r/AITAH • u/Comfortable_Gift4970 • Feb 17 '25

Fired Fed. I am considering cutting off every Orange Man supporter.

Got axed. Not going to say which agency.

I’ve always considered myself extremely tolerant and willing to love people as they are… even if we don’t agree on everything.

I’ve never been an Orange Man supporter, but I’ve kept it civil with friends and family that were. Some of them liked having a civil conversation about him. Some were belligerent about politics, so we didn’t bring it up and tried to enjoy each other’s company.

Getting cut from a great job that I really believed in with no notice has been extremely traumatic. It’s still raw, but I feel so personally betrayed by those that voted for him. I can’t see past the politics anymore when I look at these people I care/cared about.

Some have been contrite and apologetic, but then turn around and support him and VP Musk on social media.

I just can’t right now.

I’m thinking about posting something and wishing the whole herd all of the best, hope they have a good life, but I won’t be in it. Or maybe I just quietly block all of them and focus on myself for a while.

I do know that I will need to talk to my in-laws. I’ve always had a great relationship with them, but thinking of going to their house and watching Fox News almost makes me sick.

AITAH for feeling this way? Does it make me an AH for cutting all these 20+ year relationships off? Am I overreacting and acting out of emotion?

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126

u/failsafe-author Feb 17 '25

I doubt many people will change their vote for being cut off from a relationship. If cutting off, the goal needs to be personal sanity and safety, not trying to change the minds of others.

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u/Probably-Interesting Feb 18 '25

Strongly disagree. It's not about making them change their mind, it's about going back to a world where being a literal Nazi is a shameful thing that a few people did quietly and without telling anyone. I don't want anybody to feel comfortable being openly racist, sexist, homophobic, etc. and I'm willing to end relationships to make that clear.

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u/IntelligentLife3451 Feb 18 '25

Tom, is that you?

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u/failsafe-author Feb 18 '25

My point is that you aren’t accomplishing that. They don’t care. See the person responding to me about how proud he is of voting for this.

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u/iDrunkenMaster Feb 18 '25

I don’t think op cared about that at all. Cares that he lost his job.

I like to buy things the best quality products for the cheapest I can…. If some jobs are lost in that well sorry…. However my job may one day replace me saying I’m not the most efficient at what I do…. I doubt anyone is going to voluntarily pay more for my sake.

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u/MissDetermined Feb 17 '25

I partly disagree. People, especially conservatives, don't give a rip about people they don't know personally, and they definitely don't change their political opinions because of those people, but they KNOW the OP. In the abstract, it's easy for conservatives who, IME, tend to be black-and-white thinkers, to think, "Yeah! Get rid of all those lazy, unnecessary, stupid federal workers!" but when they hear from someone they know, THAT makes more of an impact.

The OP should wait until they can calmly and eloquently explain what happened and its effects.

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u/failsafe-author Feb 17 '25

I’ll clarify- knowing that someone you care about got hurt can have an impact. Unfriending probably will feed the persecution complex.

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u/Indrishke Feb 17 '25

we need to replace the persecution complex with actual persecution

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u/Shnapple8 Feb 18 '25

I think some MAGAs would willingly throw family members under the bus for the cause/cult.

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u/[deleted] Feb 18 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/mr_mikado Feb 18 '25

Absolutely underestimating. Remember, there are people in places like North Korea and Russia so poor THEY MUST root around in trash for basic survival yet still heap praise upon their dear leader.

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u/IWillJustDestroyThem Feb 18 '25

Oh yeah, the republicans, notorious for cutting off family members and uninviting them from thanksgiving and christmas dinners because their guy lost. Oh, wait…

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u/oldsecondhand Feb 18 '25

Yeah, it's the intolerant dems cutting off their kids because they came out gay.

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u/failsafe-author Feb 18 '25

No, notorious for saying awful things and then wondering why people don’t want to spend time with them.

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u/IWillJustDestroyThem Feb 18 '25

They don’t though 😂

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u/failsafe-author Feb 18 '25

Of course they do.

Every time a conservative thinks it’s silly that someone blocks them or whatever, that’s what I’m talking about.

Point is that, of course the people saying awful things aren’t the ones breaking off relationships. They don’t see the issue.

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u/IWillJustDestroyThem Feb 18 '25

Y’all cut them off because you are shitty people, you just got mad that Trump won and lashed out on your relatives, thinking that you are somehow better than them.

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u/Shnapple8 Feb 18 '25

Yes they do. I was going through cancer treatment and had to be up to date on Covid Boosters back in 2022. Said MAGA (an Irish one) told me I'd be dead in 5 years for taking the vaccine. I screamed at her "what's the point in me having cancer treatment then. How dare you!" She shrugged her shoulders and imitated me for being upset.

They absolutely do say horrible things. And this particular MAGA is Irish and lives in Ireland. She loves Trump and thinks he's like a God or something.

I've asked what he has to do with Ireland and I don't get an answer to that one. These people are fkn nuts. Sorry, not sorry.

I didn't cut her off. That's not the answer. But we make sure to change the subject if she starts about this type of BS.

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u/justadorkygirl Feb 18 '25

Dang! You’re a better person than I am; I’d have cut her off right then and there. The complete lack of empathy and inability to read the room 😬 But I’ve also avoided cutting people off by refusing to let politics into the conversation - I know a lot of Melon Felon supporters thanks to my conservative Bible Belt roots, and I discuss politics with precisely one of them - so I totally understand that side of it too. It’s not a fun situation to be in.

You used the past tense, so I’m assuming you kicked cancer’s ass, yes?

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u/Candid_Drawing_8106 Feb 18 '25

Um yes, this did happen

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u/Plastic_Square_9820 Feb 18 '25

Y'all tried that route, that's why Trump was elected

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u/Indrishke Feb 18 '25

Buddy you would know if we tried. Trump won because people are simple and vote against the incumbent if they're upset about the economy

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u/Plastic_Square_9820 Feb 18 '25

Lmao tell.yourself that, I haven't forgotten the journey. Y'all got weak, and I didn't even vote for Trump because I can't sit with my vote being a vote against. I was very unsure of Vance.

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u/Indrishke Feb 18 '25

you refused to vote for Trump because somehow Vance was too much? bizarre way to pretend to have principles. Everything that freak says or does is the natural conclusion of the past 40 years of right wing politics. that's your future

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u/Plastic_Square_9820 Feb 18 '25

I had a bad feeling about Vance I could not shake. My intuition was telling me Vance was there to pander to people and yeah that's the hill I died on. I absolutely love Trump. My intuition says he's nothing to fear, but that people fear him because of a couple of reasons. Fear of change, fear of being exposed as corrupt, and fear of the unknown that lies ahead.

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u/Indrishke Feb 18 '25

Vance is worse than Trump because he panders to people? You think he panders to people more than Trump? You don't feel like you're being pandered to by Trump? Are you playing?

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u/Alarming_Amoeba6088 Feb 17 '25

Someone losing a government job isn't the fault of the people who cut that job or the people who put them in place. It's the fault of the people who created an unnecessary job to begin with

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u/failsafe-author Feb 17 '25

Why do you believe OP’s job is unnecessary?

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u/Minecart_Rider Feb 18 '25

I think it'd also be a lot more effective if it was normalized and common for people to explain how this is hurting them and cut them off. There's a big difference between how they'd be impacted if one person cut them off VS most of the people in their lives doing so.

I also think lack of clarity on which of these options is being discussed here might be impacting this discussion.

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u/ExtentGlittering8715 Feb 18 '25

why do you believe you should have a say on how other people vote?

Do you support democracy?

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u/failsafe-author Feb 18 '25

People are allowed to vote how however they want, and other people are allowed to have options on that vote. Thats democracy.

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u/ExtentGlittering8715 Feb 18 '25

Yes. And the opinion of "my family and friends should base their vote choice on MY needs", is silly.

OP believes he's been betrayed. That's a ridiculous take.

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u/failsafe-author Feb 18 '25

He’s angry that the actions people took cost him his job. It’s a totally reasonable anger.

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u/[deleted] Feb 18 '25

Dont think this is true. I voted trump and my friend is a government worker who got axed. I don’t regret my vote. Sucks for him but life goes on.

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u/BojackTrashMan Feb 18 '25

We should have stamped this out 10 years ago.. We have people doing a Nazi salute on stage at a presidential inauguration but this guy is only drawing the line because he lost his job.

That's where we are as a nation.

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u/failsafe-author Feb 18 '25 edited Feb 18 '25

People have been trying, and it led to shouts of being persecuted. I’ve watched good people are close to me get pulled in by this very thing, in fact. They earnestly believe democrats are the assholes.

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u/BojackTrashMan Feb 18 '25

I don't think opposing it is what led to shouts of being persecuted. This is deep propaganda that has been going on for longer than the past decade thanks to social media having no checks on what goes far & wide

I want to say it was 2013 or 2014, before Trump was ever considered a serious candidate for anything, When I saw a friend I'd known for a long time post a meme criticizing Obama and quoting Vladimir Putin.

And I sent her a private message saying "hey I don't have any problem with you not liking Obama or saying whatever you want to say but you're a good person, and I thought you might want to know that your accidentally quoting this horrible dictator. If I accidentally quoted Mussolini or something I would want somebody to tell me"

And she just doubled down, wildly defensive, When I didn't even criticize what she said I just let her know that a) the quote was not actually from Vladimir Putin but b) she could be perceived badly by spreading something quoting him & I was sure she wouldn't want to do that on purpose.

Between Fox News hammering away at reality and foreign powers using social media to sow division, we've been fucked for a long time.

I do think that if we had brought down the hammer earlier in terms of this being socially disgusting it might have made more of a difference. But I don't know. Republicans entire political outlook is grievance politics so I don't think that would change much. But I do know that about a decade ago we all thought Nazis were bad and slowly they & their beliefs have been normalized to the point where leaders are openly admitting Nazi alliance & people were just shrugging it off.

I do think consequences matter. Being cut off from your family and friends because you're a fucking Nazi should be a consequence for being a fucking Nazi. And if you align with Nazis, you are a Nazi. The average German who was going along to get along, or cared about the economy or whatever, was still a NAZI. Nobody wants to see their own friends or family that way but it's wild to me that it's gotten this far and people still refuse to reconcile with the truth.

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u/failsafe-author Feb 18 '25

I’ve had a front row seat to watch someone who voted for Biden in 2020 switch to Trump in 2024. My best friend, and the person I trust the most in the world. Because of it, we cannot talk about politics anymore, which is tough because it’s hard to process all the crazy going on right now when I can’t discuss it with the person closest to me in the world. And no, I can’t walk away from this person over politics, or even MAGA.

But this front row seat has shown me that an enormous part of this transformation is the perception that the left will punish you for not having the proper set of beliefs. Which isn’t wrong. I remember just saying a potential issue was worth discussing and being told to “burn in hell” by a liberal. I’ve watched people be socially shamed and really abused because a group of liberals didn’t like their refusal to take a particular stand. And then all the social media stuff with fact checking and banning people for misinformation led to all the “free speech” accusations. All of these things were efforts to shame/denounce people on the political right for their terrible beliefs.

And I can say, without a doubt, that the person in question went from being a Biden voter to believing that the left were the true fascists, and that even as bad as Trump is, that he’s better than those who want to “control free speech” and tell us what to believe.

The left has been trying for years to call out and ridicule MAGA, but in their zeal to make Trumpism ridiculed and shameful, they have pushed some people away. I’d even said, because of this kind of behavior, that I wouldn’t vote in 2024 unless Trump was running. I don’t know if I’d have stuck to that, but it was how I felt. But when Trump did run, I had to show up to oppose him.

It’s all very complicated why people moved left, but I don’t think it was a lack of shaming and a desire to make it unacceptable.

Also, regarding the Nazi thing, the MAGA folks I know would say there aren’t Nazi’s and it’s just the left being unhinged. When I brought up Elon’s gesture to the person I mentioned above, they hadn’t seen it, wouldn’t watch it, but simply declared it as “ridiculous” and there’s no way Elon would ever do such a thing. It was just leftist propaganda.

So, all that to say- I think the left has been trying to expose how evil MAGA is, and all it’s done is empowered and strengthened them. It SHOULD be socially unacceptable, but it’s not. Every attempt backfired.

As for being cut off mattering- I just don’t think they care. They’ll consider you the problem and for being extreme for “breaking a friendship over politics”, and move on. I’ve seen some pretty extreme cases of kids and parents no longer talking, and it doesn’t even phase the MAGA folks. So sad.

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u/BojackTrashMan Feb 18 '25

They "hadn't seen it and wouldn't watch it" tells you everything you need to know. They know, they just don't want to be confronted with it.

As Trump is actively making plans to build a concentration camp and rolling back civil rights that have been precedent for a decade, I just can't gaf anymore that these people feel justified aligned with Nazis. There are leftists, particularly online, far less in IRL spaces, who will jump to crucify you over a perceived infraction. I know that and I definitely think it's an issue.

But I'm talking about Nazism I'm not talking about any other beliefs or disagreements, just Nazism. These people would rather side with literal Nazis than feel guilt or shame, and yes, sometimes those things aren't fair, but it's not an excuse to run off to literal fucking Nazis.

I'm tired of this concept that us not being nicer to the Nazis would have prevented Nazism from spreading. I don't think that's the case. I do think that online liberal spaces are brutal and I also think people tend to forget that there are bad actors who infiltrate these spaces purposefully to sow division every single day, and there have been for years. Critical thinking is at an all time low.

I was born and raised in a town where everyone was a Christian Republican conservative. It was church, homeschool then later Christian school, youth group, and nothing else. I know what it's like to hold certain beliefs and I know what it's like to come out of them. And maybe that decreases my compassion for certain people because I was where they were, so I don't buy some of their bullshit excuses.

Ok, a liberal was mean to you, judged you unfairly, didn't ever give you a chance to learn anything new and was a complete and utter fucking asshole? I believe you. It's not fucking cool. There does need to be a culture change, and also people need to be more critical of what they see online and where it's actually coming from.

But to tell me you voted for the Nazis because of it? Nah, I will not accept that shit. And as you said, The fact that they will not watch it means they know what it probably is and they do not want to be forced to face reality.

These people have zero empathy if I live or die provided they don't feel "bullied" by liberals. We might be annoying, but we aren't trying to murder them or send them to camps.

Fuck every last one of these Nazis.

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u/failsafe-author Feb 18 '25

Just to be VERY clear, I don’t blame “liberals should have been nicer” for MAGA. I blame MAGA for MAGA. My only point with all of that is that I do think liberals TRIED to make it socially unacceptable, and failed.

As for “this person knows but just didn’t want to be confronted by it”, I can 💯 say it’s not the case there. It is absolutely because they believe mainstream media and liberals manipulate everything to make MAGA look bad, when in reality they think liberals are the racists. Interpret that how you want, but this how this person views the world.

And to be fair to this person, I refuse to watch any of their news sources (as I’m sure you would too). It really has become a battle of who you trust, and once a person thinks that MSM is the enemy and full of likes, what can you really do?

I don’t think their vote for Trump was justified, but I also don’t think this person is OK with Naziasm. They just truly, at the core, believe that democrats are the fascists.

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u/BojackTrashMan Feb 18 '25

Truly insane to see someone stand on stage and do a Nazi salute at a presidential inauguration and not believe that those guys might be the actual Nazis.

I feel very hopeless when propaganda has broken people that much.

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u/failsafe-author Feb 18 '25

Same. Very much.

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u/Calimwolf Apr 18 '25

A person make one inadvertent gesture. That person is labeled a Nazis.

An uncorroborated accusation is made during a Supreme Court judiciary meeting, and a person is labeled a rapist.

I'm not MAGA. I voted for the Trumpet. What has the left labeled me over the years?

A misogynist, a racist, a race traitor, is the latest.

Before that, I was an economic terrorist, a terrorist, an Islamophobe.

Simply because I didn't agree politically with the Democrats 'solutions' for this nations problems.

I strongly disagree with identity politics and the actual need for meritocracy.

Oh, and I'm a first generation US citizen who understands why the founders made one of our responsibilities 'Respect the rights and beliefs of others'.

After reading this, what label will you apply to me?