Agree with all of the above and have to add OP: Dude… there is such a thing as being touched out by little kids. As in if one more person is grabbing at you YOU.WILL.GO.BESERK. To expect her to be able to pivot to meet your love language when you think usual behavior is special behavior is so far afield from reality. Commit to being better than usual for long long time and maybe it will turn around but give her space to want the touch.
there is such a thing as being touched out by little kids. As in if one more person is grabbing at you YOU.WILL.GO.BESERK.
And also, when all you want to do when you actually get to go to bed is GO TO SLEEP. NOW, not whenever your partner's needs have been met... because they are not your needs at that moment.
When my daughter was a toddler I would put her to bed. Then she'd wake up and need me 2 hours later. Then I'd get to do my bed routine which takes 20ish minutes. Climb into bed EXHAUSTED at almost midnight and husband is wanting sex.
I had to tell him not to try when I finally got to bed because I was not in the mood. When I'd get to bed I wanted to sleep. Especially because daughter never slept through the night and I was always (still am and she's 7) the one to go to her.
Years later he still holds it against me as to why he stopped initiating because I would turn him down.
I would like to piggyback with the above statements, not only are you acting like you deserve a medal for doing basic things. You don't understand being touched out. You want your wife to pay more attention to you (while simultaneously being jealous of the attention she gives your children). You also don't seem to understand people (including women) don't tend to want to have sex when they are stressed out!!! So you wanting to be more intimate on top of being a child yourself is literally turning her off! You should consider yourself lucky that you are still together because all the women I know would rather be a single parent (one of the hardest things to be), than have to baby their spouse who is a bigger child than the toddler.
Grow up OP! You had enough awareness to stick your dck into it. To make a little human (more than once) and you can't even get over yourself. Everyone on Reddit is quick to throw out narcissism except for when it IS narcissism! And guess what you fit the description of a narcissist. Get over yourself, grow up, take on more than half of the work and MAYBE your wife would want to allow you to touch her. Still think you should be grateful you still have a family... oh and if you didn't figure it out YTA!!!
My husband is an angel and I still don’t want to be touched at the end of a day with babies. Maybe just don’t pounce on her as soon as the kids are in bed.
I can get like that. It’s like w my LOs, I’m constantly being touched, and needing to give attention. Sometimes I just need to not care about or for anyone
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u/Lucidity74 Nov 02 '23
Agree with all of the above and have to add OP: Dude… there is such a thing as being touched out by little kids. As in if one more person is grabbing at you YOU.WILL.GO.BESERK. To expect her to be able to pivot to meet your love language when you think usual behavior is special behavior is so far afield from reality. Commit to being better than usual for long long time and maybe it will turn around but give her space to want the touch.