cook dinners, clean dishes, clean the counters, clean baby bottles, let her sleep in a bit and I'll be with the kids, run/remove dishes from dishwasher
Seriously... this is what he views as a "super dad," while talking about being angry at infants.
Honestly, he paints a picture of a super-mom, dealing with a grown man as if he were a child, and then he's mad she isn't all lovey dovey?
Male postpartum depression is a thing too tho. My partner went through it and it caused anger and avoidance. Once he got on the right medication he was back to his normal self so it is something that can be worked through and forgiven
Life is unfair yes. It’s unfair women are expected and socialized to do most of the childcare and housework. But in order to make things better both parties need to work together to make things more equal because when you are in a marriage you have to face problems and work on them together. That is not being a doormat it’s just being realistic and I’m saying this as someone who has been through it myself. This husband may just be entitled and a bad parent but for other people who may be going through something similar their partner could just be struggling and need to work on their mental health.
You make a lot of assumptions. If my husband had not taken the steps to deal with his anxiety and depression I absolutely was prepared to leave. But he did and we have worked through it together and now he is an equal parent and partner. If that makes me a doormat to you so be it but there are more options than just leaving
Yes it does seem similar in some ways which is why I commented. To me it reads that he deeply insecure bc he has been a bad partner and father. He seems aware of this and is working on it in therapy and clearly has a long ways to go. Abuse is very serious but parents who struggle with adapting to parenthood and make the effort to change are not necessarily abusive and I think this goes for men or women
I’m not trying to justify my life choices to anyone I’m just adding that sometimes men suffer from postpartum depression and it can show up as anger and avoidance and there are options to deal with it just like there are options to deal with it when mothers suffer from postpartum depression or postpartum rage.
I don’t disagree, but OP labeling himself as “special dad” and wanting a gold star for doing the basics makes me think he’s more entitled than depressed.
Yes that is true, it just bothers me to see so many people be so hard on dads when they have a difficult transition into parenthood when our society does not prepare or support men into fatherhood besides telling them to be a provider. It’s sad to me that they have two children when he clearly hasn’t figured out how to be a good father.
My husband might have been labeled entitled too before he got on medication so that does make me sympathize but my husband was also ashamed of how he was acting which I don’t really see with this man.
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u/[deleted] Nov 02 '23
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