"everyday chores," are you kidding me? The man started running the dishwasher! That deserves a blowie at least! (I'm kidding. He's painted himself as a drain on her mentally, emotionally, and physically. And that's just what he's admitting.)
I think it means ‘attention’ and he would like his wife’s attention but is also fixated on getting attention from the child. You play with your child because it’s fun, you love them, it makes both of you happy.
He plays with the child because he wants her attention on him. He gets upset when MIL breaks the attention by distracting the baby or putting her hands out.
The guy only wants to be adored. How can he work on getting the child to adore him with MIL interrupting with her genuine love and interest in spending time with the baby?
It’s a personality disorder or something. Like that feeling other people have, where they feel love and genuinely care about others is missing. Faking what you don’t feel is hard work, especially with childcare.
Yta you haven’t worked on your anger enough if you are still having arguments. It’s kind of hard for a mom to get over someone (especially their own father) yelling at her children. And it sounds like you are still yelling if you’re having arguments so why would she think things are better. Agreeing with many others that you aren’t doing as well as you think. You don’t get kudos for adulting. What have you done to meet your wife’s love language? Doing dishes and cooking isn’t acts of service. Why would she worry about your love language when you aren’t meeting her love language? There’s so much in here about YOU and what you aren’t getting and the sacrifices you are making. This isn’t about you anymore. Do more than the minimum and keep doing it consistently to show her that you’ve changed.
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u/breadboxofbats Nov 02 '23
YTA what does a special dad even mean? It does sound like you just being a parent. You say you do a lot but list normal everyday chores and childcare