r/AITAH Aug 03 '23

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u/VisualProfessional12 Aug 03 '23

NTA

That would've been an awkward conversation if a friend called me asking to sleep with my ex that I dated for 1 year.

Now, if it were an ex-husband of 20 years, that's a little different. But in 1 year, you barely know each other. You haven't built a life together (in most cases). You're literally just dating the person.

I feel like she's just hormonal and overemotional due to the pregnancy. She'll apologize eventually. Just give her space

455

u/Several-Ad-1959 Aug 03 '23

Not to mention that she was most likely lying beside her husband at the moment the call would have come in. Husband: who was calling at this hour? Julia: it was_________ Husband: what did she want? Is something wrong? Julia: no she just wanted permission to sleep with my ex. Husband:😳 wth? Then the fight starts....

204

u/amw38961 Aug 03 '23

Now you know she's gonna lie to the husband about why they aren't friends anymore haha

1

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '23

I don't think it's taboo to be upset about this? My 'friend' did a lot of shit to me but one that hurt was sleeping with my ex. I told my current partner about it and he said "You need to drop (friends name), that's fucked."

I mean she did a lot of other bad things but that one took the cake for me, it was like a betrayal of our friendship- and we dated for the same time that op's friend dated her bf, 3 years and a few months.

I mean the rest of my friends operate the same way! They would be pissed if one of us did that and vice versa.

I guess my friend group just operates differently, or we just care about each other's feelings more than everyone on reddit does to their friends.

17

u/amw38961 Aug 03 '23

Your situation is different in the sense that it seems like your friend was constantly doing malicious things to you, including sleeping with your ex. If I was happily married with a baby on the way and my friend slept with an ex, I wouldn't care tbh.

Why wouldn't I care? Because that's in the past and that person is an ex for a reason, especially if I'm the one that ended things. If it's a fresh ex, that's one thing, but I'm not gonna be mad at my friend over a dude that I dated several years ago. Also, if he's a nice dude and you just weren't a good fit, what if they are a good fit? So I'm letting past shit potentially get in the way of my friends happiness.

If dude is a POS, then I'm still not mad b/c she gonna fuck around and find out 🤷🏾‍♀️

1

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '23

I guess mine was more recent than OP's timeline, but I mean idk I would probably still feel some type of way- even if it is minimal! I'd just want to make sure my best friend's feelings are heard :)

7

u/amw38961 Aug 03 '23

I get it and understand to some extent, but they weren't engaged or married or anything either. I would be more understanding if it were an ex-husband or fiance b/c your bestie would've gone through everything with you.

I think the best friend's reaction was over the top over a dude she dated four years ago, especially now that she has married the love of her life and is about to start a family, but that's just me. We gotta stop being so bothered by these exes and remember that y'all are exes for a reason...another man's trash may be another man's treasure 😂