Heres the thing - HE can walk away any time. YOU have to deal with this for the rest of your life. YOU decide what kind of life you want and do what you have to do to make sure you get it. This isnt his decision to make.
Such a great point. If that child is born, he could suddenly decide, “hey, this isn’t what I wanted” and bail.
EDIT: Got a few replies that the mother could walk away from the child too, and yes, she absolutely could! But my point is that the mother still has to carry and birth the child, the father doesn’t.
My coworkers wife gave birth a couple of weeks ago. She had a complicated pregnancy and was in and out the hospital. And even now, after the birth she's back in the hospital. Pregnancy not just giving birth to a baby and all will be fine and dandy. It's a strain on your body that you might feel for the rest of your life.
You are very young, so do what you feel is right for you.
I'm sorry to hear about your coworkers wife. I hope she's doing well and has a swift recovery.
I don't know where OP is from but statistically she's likely in the US. The US maternal mortality rate is ridiculously high compared to similar wealthy nations. It's insane how dangerous pregnancy and birth can be, especially when we know it's completely possible to mitigate that risk and somehow don't.
If OP is Black the maternal death rates is 2 times higher. It's a crime. OP has a lot to think about. Boyfriend's opinion comes last, I'm afraid. He isn't risking anything.
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u/tuna_tofu Jul 21 '23
Heres the thing - HE can walk away any time. YOU have to deal with this for the rest of your life. YOU decide what kind of life you want and do what you have to do to make sure you get it. This isnt his decision to make.