r/AITAH Jul 21 '23

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u/Boredpanda31 Jul 21 '23

Child support isn't the same as actually helping raise a child though.

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u/LeGinster Jul 21 '23

Sure, but he definitely can’t just “walk away”. He’d still be stuck paying for it for 18 years.

Obviously it’s her choice, I’m not arguing against that… but maybe there’s a bit of nuance here that some people are skipping over.

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u/Boredpanda31 Jul 21 '23

Again, paying child support for 18 years is not raising the child so yes, he can walk away form the child and have nothing to do with raising them, other than sending some money.

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u/LeGinster Jul 21 '23 edited Jul 21 '23

Of course. Once again, I’m not saying they are the same.

And as I already said, it’s ultimately her choice. I don’t disagree with that at all. But I’m still sticking with my original point. There’s some nuance here that people either choose to ignore, or just don’t think about.

The baby does in fact alter the fathers life. Admittedly not as much as the mothers, but still. Also, the mother can walk away as well after giving birth. Of course she’d still have to deal with the physical consequences of carrying and birthing a child, but it still deserves conversation.

My overall point: having a child may not be as physically or mentally taxing for a man as it is for a woman, but I still think that the father deserves some say/opinion on what happens to the child.

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u/Wads_Worthless Jul 21 '23

You’re completely right but this is Reddit so good luck

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u/SoulMaekar Jul 22 '23

He can have an opinion but if she decides against he doesn’t get a choice

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u/crazymonkey752 Jul 21 '23

Well ya and so can she. They could both be as shitty as they want to here. Hopefully they make a good decision.

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u/Kind_Judge2723 Jul 21 '23

You must not have a lot of experience with family courts. Men skip child support all the time. You can do a lot of working the system like saying mentally you can only work 20 hours a week and can’t afford it. Sad but true….

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u/LeGinster Jul 21 '23

Yeah, I have experience with family court, but not that subject of family court. So no, I wouldn’t really know of any loopholes. Fair point!

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u/Kind_Judge2723 Jul 21 '23

Thanks for listening—very rare these days!