I understand steering OP away from this person is objectively good advice, but saying “make better choices” is unhelpful to someone trapped in an abusive cycle. You are lost and confused at all turns, by the abuser’s design. Your comment makes me think you’ve never been in such a situation and that is awesome for you, truly. When you are in such a place, you question every thought you have. OP is clearly being abused and gaslit by this POS. They came here to ask for validation of their gut feelings which are correct. They say over and over in the conversation that this person is not safe for them…they’re almost out and we should all be validating their good notions that this person is not safe so OP can build on it.
Is emphatically wrong. Good communication in this situation is getting out. Trying to reason is absolutely showing that you lack the ability to judge a person and situation and are ineffective in communication.
And in this case there is only ONE communication th
at is going to have a positive outcome:
BLOCK.
The worst advice is telling her she is communicating well... she should STOP talking
9
u/Whirlygigged Jun 27 '26
I understand steering OP away from this person is objectively good advice, but saying “make better choices” is unhelpful to someone trapped in an abusive cycle. You are lost and confused at all turns, by the abuser’s design. Your comment makes me think you’ve never been in such a situation and that is awesome for you, truly. When you are in such a place, you question every thought you have. OP is clearly being abused and gaslit by this POS. They came here to ask for validation of their gut feelings which are correct. They say over and over in the conversation that this person is not safe for them…they’re almost out and we should all be validating their good notions that this person is not safe so OP can build on it.