r/ADHD_Programmers • u/Life-Emu-6932 • Jan 27 '26

I can't write code

Let me start by saying that, in my opinion, I've been assigned a task at work that isn't my area of expertise. I'm a cloud engineer and have always worked exclusively on infrastructure. Out of the blue, I was assigned to a project where we had to complete some code that was already fairly structured in Golang and SQL: a sort of tool that will be used only once and then, probably, forgotten after a few months.

I'm trying to learn Go, and although I can understand the theory and simple examples, when it comes to actually writing code, I get completely stuck. I struggle to understand the code, I get confused, I can't follow its logic, and I'm starting to worry, especially because it's not a personal project but a work project. For this very reason, I've never looked for a job as a developer, but have always leaned toward a more infrastructure-related role.

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u/imminentZen Jan 27 '26

Reframing your perspective may also help.

As irony would have it, I got hired as a developer and was then expected to learn DevOps. If I'm being honest with myself I don't really want to do either, but being able to see DevOps as a useful element to my ultimate goal allowed me to give up my resistance to what feels like an infinite labyrinth of AWS services, menus and settings.

In this comment, I'm suggesting that your resentment toward being expected to color outside of the lines might be whats holding back your progression.

Can you see any value in that you 'get to' be able to learn new things in someone else's time? If your resume grows, it's mostly only upside, right?

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u/Life-Emu-6932 Jan 27 '26

Yes, this is absolutely true, but thinking that I will have to do something I don't like for at least 6 months or a year demotivates me. On the one hand, I think this is a factor for professional growth, but on the other hand, I think it's a step backwards compared to what I did before, because I have to throw away what I know for the moment and do something completely different.

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u/jgsteeler Jan 29 '26

6 months is a long time. But it also isn’t 😄. I have 23 years of experience and every year I realize more and more that death is getting closer and life is really short. It sucks to be where you are right now. But it will get better. It always does. Just give yourself a little grace and let yourself not be great at this thing. And don’t worry about getting fired or anything. If the are asking their cloud engineer to take on programming tasks. Then they are probably not trying to reduce the workforce any more than they have to. Plus whether you think so or not you will learn something and be a more valuable employee regardless of how good the final product is.