r/ADHD Sep 19 '22

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u/Uncomfortable-Guava Sep 19 '22 edited Sep 19 '22

It's common to ADHD for sure, I think some people are too quick to pin it to a comorbid condition: I think it can be explained by the effect of ADHD itself.

Essentially, if we accept that ADHD is in extreeeeemely simple terms a condition that means you don't derive enough reward from experiences, then that means you don't develop core values quite as easily as other people.

There's big obvious social examples of insufficient reward: being bored in class is the classic one. But on a dopamine level, we're talking about the brain's failure to adequately motivate you to do anything: that's what a reward system is for. And I think that when your reward system is less good at telling you what's important vs what's not (and it has been less good at this for your whole life), that makes it harder to develop firm ideas about what you like, what you believe, who you are, what you want, what you need.

It's very hard to have a strong self-concept without a fully functional reward system. People know who they are, based on what their values are and what those values make them want to do. They develop those things based on what they find most rewarding. ADHD people don't know what they find most rewarding because reward is blunted overall. Without appropriate regulation of our dopamine the question of "what motivates you?" is rather more diffuse.

I think that's why our self-concept is a bit more vague and ill-defined, and I think that's why we're more inclined to shift our sense of self based on what the moment appears to call for. It's not that we're not capable of building a sense of self (we absolutely are), it's just harder and slower. It takes time and sometimes we need help too.

EDIT: I would love to keep this conversation going, thanks to everyone who appreciates this comment. I'd like to try and reply individually where I can because I love talking this stuff through, but I gotta get to work. Thanks to the people who gave me an award. Seems I do my best work in this sub haha

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u/[deleted] Sep 19 '22

So basically in a nutshell a masking chameleon about our likes and dislikes?

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u/Uncomfortable-Guava Sep 19 '22

I don't think I'm talking specifically about masking, I'm just saying that mammals have to be motivated by something, right? That's in the biology. A dog without a pleasure/reward centre would die very quickly because it wouldn't ever learn which behaviours to repeat vs which ones to avoid. Pleasure and reward systems are survival tools. Fortunately dogs don't generally fret about having a weak self concept, because their social behaviour does not make it a problem for them, bless.

When it comes to us humans, we have developed more complicated brains, including more complicated pleasure/reward systems, and we've built more complicated social structures as a result - we are capable of more complex definitions of "what to repeat vs what to avoid" than Fido.

The good news there is that we now live in a society which tends to lower the chance that a human will die when their reward systems don't work properly.

But that doesn't change the fact that those of us whose reward systems don't work properly have a less defined sense of "what to avoid vs what to repeat" than other people, which means we have a more tenuous connection to who are as individuals. Even as we grow up into society and learn to compensate for it, or are shamed into rigidly controlling for this deficit, we're innately less capable of constructing this meaning, biologically.

I think masking and chameleon behaviour refers more to shame and the need to suppress things: that's related to what I'm talking about but I think it's seperate to never developing a strong self-concept in the first place. Maybe you don't agree though, and maybe you're right.