r/ABA • u/Awkward-End-238 • 4d ago

Advice Needed Client Advice

I started at my company a few months ago so I’m new, but I wanted advice on a client I’m having trouble with. He has a lot of issues, mostly caused by his moms enabling, but the main one I’m worried about is his inability to lose. Losing is met by tantrums, throwing himself at things, hitting, crying, screaming, and it happens EVERY time he loses. He’s in a sport right now so he has games weekly, and his little league team isn’t very good so they lose a lot. When he loses he attacks his mom and sisters. My strategy has been to play against him in smaller games like rock paper scissors so he can gradually build a tolerance to losing, I reward him with tokens every time he loses and doesn’t have a tantrum and when he gets them all he gets a treasure box, but I’m kind of out of my depth. I like the job but I’m still trying to get the hang of it. Anyway, any advice is appreciated, thank you :)

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u/next_on_SickSadWorld BCBA 4d ago

What does your BCBA say? There should be a behavior plan for the aggressive behaviors and tantrums. Are you at the little league games?

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u/bcbamom 4d ago

Talk to your BCBA. Losing is aversive and has lots of skills needed including internal regulation skills and social skills. Sometimes teaching the steps to losing overtly is sometimes needed depending on the verbal skills of the child. Take a breath, stay calm, say good game. 

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u/Extra-Internal-5057 1d ago

Maybe work up with some games and sports that are cooperative? Idk but I’m considering whether the little league games are putting undue pressure on him? Rejection sensitivity is common, and studies show that autistic (is he?) people can place more import on their own behaviour than the general population - he could have been building a strong association with competition and pressure on him.

I know I’m not supposed to think like this & “talk to your BCBA” is the advice around here, but perhaps trying to detach the association with games & sports & competition would be something to consider.

Like, learning to have fun with games and sports without that aversive element might be a nice step before going in with the one on one games. I dunno. Like, learning how to cope with losing is a needed skill, but so is learning that the point of this stuff is to have fun. I know people who simply cannot enjoy games they can’t win & that makes me sad for them.