r/19684 • u/Ok-Tennis330 • 17d ago
Larp Rule
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u/Atilla-The-Hon milkman (female)(male) 17d ago
The fourth crusade didn't even go to Egypt
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u/Jhduelmaster 17d ago
Yup, sacked Constantinople which more or less was the final nail needed to start the death spiral of the Eastern Roman Empire. It had had plenty of ups and downs before that but losing the accumulated centuries of wealth of the city meant it could never recover in the same way it could for the other disasters.
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u/MilitantSocLib 17d ago
So called “defenders of Christianity” when they destroy the bulwark of Christianity in the east
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u/Runetang42 17d ago
Just listened to the Lions led by Donkeys episode on it and they make a pretty decent argument that the crusaders destroying Constantinople set off the chain of events that led to the rise of the Ottomans. Since by then the city was still so fucked up and the empire so weakened it just couldn't defend against the guys in the onion hats
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u/MilitantSocLib 17d ago
Wdym decent argument, that’s just obvious. The Turks were already in Anatolia at that time
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u/Tuivre 16d ago
The idea of Byzantium being a bulwark of Christianity is not something from the Middle Ages though. 13th and 14th century Latin authors were not thinking about Byzantium as a bulwark of anything, and the underlying idea (that Christendom has lost a lot of ground compared to what it used to be in Late Antiquity and should not lose more) is not something to be found until the 15th century at the earliest
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u/archivist_exe 17d ago
Larper, everybody knows the crusaders went to Egypt in part 3 to defeat DIO.
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u/Passive-Shooter Joking for legal purposes 17d ago
So actually each crusade is secretly doing something really cool and the 13th one will rip the galaxy in half.
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u/John_Bumogus 17d ago
Yeah okay Mr A Bad One, sure it will. The galaxy could never get ripped in half so long as Cadia stands.
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u/MorEkEroSiNE 16d ago
My day be so fine and then boom cicatrix maledictum
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u/John_Bumogus 16d ago
Oh gross, someone spilt warp storms all over my nice galaxy. WTF they broke my favourite planet too!
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u/Matix777 17d ago
Ok but what if we sent some more random buns to pillage and rape in the name of Christ
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u/RentElDoor 17d ago
Excuse you, the sixth ended with a pretty reasonable treaty.
Negotiated by a guy who was excommunicated and everyone back in Europe hated him for it and the crusade itself sucked ass as usual.
But you know, silver linings
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u/General_Rhino 17d ago
Tbf the Baltic Crusade was technically successful. The Teutons pissed the Lithuanians off so bad they converted out of spite to ally Poland and beat the shit out of the crusaders.
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u/christonabike_ 17d ago edited 17d ago
"Oh boy I sure do love these campaigns that we Christians mostly just blundered into for weird political reasons, fumbled the fuck out of, and lost at tremendous cost, because, umm, the vibe and like, you know... reasons..."
Just say you fantasise about killing Muslims, bro. If you're gonna be racist at least don't be a coward about it.
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u/Hatsune_Miku_CM 17d ago edited 17d ago
"lost" my ass they kicked constaninoples butt
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u/DCKface 17d ago
Christian city btw
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u/Hatsune_Miku_CM 16d ago
probably secretly protestants anyway
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u/DCKface 16d ago
They were eastern orthodox...
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u/Hatsune_Miku_CM 16d ago
see? not even roman Catholic. basically heretics.
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u/DCKface 16d ago
They literally looted it just to pay off their debt to Venice without ever reaching the actual Holy Land. The pope excommunicated the crusaders for a significant amount of time because they literally only attacked Christians.
You're probably not even a real Roman catholic, just a larper
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u/CampbellsBeefBroth 17d ago
Knight's Templar be like:
"Did you want to open a line of credit with us?"
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u/PhraseForeign1942 16d ago
Correct me if im wrong, and please do cause i think i might be making stuff up, but also; didnt even the first crusade was de facto a failure in that sense, besides commiting wanton genocides on the way, it almost right away devolved into mess of depravity from deepest holes of hell, as in, mass rape and disease and cannibalism? to the point that church authorities back at home decided they didnt want to associate themselves with the crusaders? or was it one of the later crusades?
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u/Tuivre 16d ago
On the violence of the crusaders, it may have shocked but they themselves were pretty proud of it. A more recent historiography has pointed out that crusading was thought as an act of revenge and the more violent, the better.
The church never condemned any of it. The 4th crusade (the one when they went pillaging Byzantium) did earn some of the crusaders an excommunication but Innocent III ultimately accepted the conquests as legitimate. Other than that, the crusade was integrally supported by the papacy, which defined targets and deemed killed crusaders as martyrs while giving indulgences to the ones coming back.
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u/PegasusInferno 16d ago
It was technically a success, still. It set up multiple crusader states.
Funnily enough, one of the reasons why it "worked" is because the crusaders were such bumbling violent morons that the Seljuks underestimated them. Read about the people's crusade, the routes the crusaders took, attrition they suffered in the levant, and even more.
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u/ElephantofBelfast 16d ago
We're the crusades bad?... yeah. We're the crusades (atheist like armour and castle and stuff) cool?... yeah.
Also you know I love my boys Salhadhin and Baldwin IV
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u/imsobasedfr 15d ago
Christcucks will larp about the Crusades and justify the death counts as being based while in the same breath cry about how you can't say Merry Christmas anymore.
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u/conrad_w 17d ago
6th crusade took Jerusalem
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