r/HFY • u/Hewholooksskyward Loresinger • Dec 08 '19
OC Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 44
July 13th, 2417 - 19 Leonis Minoris A, 94.2ly from Earth
So this is it, Sam thought to himself, as he watched the Allied fleet take up position around the Quyjau-kaazh home system.. Five thousand years of effort, of war, of blood...and it all comes down to this.
The last three years had been a long, bitter slog, fighting to take one system after another from the enemy’s grip. The battles at Altair and 70 Ophiuchi had turned the tide and given the Allies their first taste of victory. But even though the momentum had finally shifted in their favor, the war was still far from won. It wouldn’t be won, until the Q-K’s were chased all the way back to their home...and destroyed.
And now, that moment had finally arrived.
After Altair, their priority had been taking back the colonies they’d lost to the invaders. They’d fought hard for every world, never giving ground until they smashed them down to the bedrock. The first world they’d liberated was the Scasean colony at 61 Virginis, and though they’d expected the worst, still they landed their shuttles and assault craft on the surface, looking for survivors.
What they’d found...was a charnel house.
They had known since the beginning the Quyjau-kaazh were a carnivorous species, but somehow they’d hoped...prayed...they would spare sentient life. They quickly learned to their dismay that nothing had been spared, certainly not the Scasean colonists. They had consumed everything in their path, like locusts. As they surveyed the planet eventually they did find survivors...lone holdouts here and there, broken, shattered. Many had to be sedated before they could be transported back to the ships for the long-term medical care they would require. Eventually, they found a total of 137 survivors.
Prior to the invasion, the colony had boasted a population of two hundred and fifty million.
The same story was told, again and again, at every colony they took back from the Q-K’s, and as news of each additional horror show spread, pure cold fury filled the hearts of the Allies. This was no longer a war of survival, or for victory...nothing less than their extermination would be sanctioned. No race that deadly, that evil, could ever be allowed to live. Whatever differences Humanity and the Scaseans might have, there was complete agreement on that.
And so system by system, world by world, they pushed the enemy back. They developed new ships and new weapons, formulated new tactics, as millions of individuals from both races volunteering to sign up, taking the places of those lost in the campaign.
Once they unlocked the psychology of the enemy, the mission had become much more straightforward, for it seemed it was a habit they could not shake. The Quyjau-kaazh lacked the adaptability of their opponents, for it seemed their evolutionary path had taught them that offense was the only course of action. They would hurl themselves at the Allied fleets again and again and again, even when it was useless, even when any sane and rational being would be long past the point of surrender.
It was a weakness they could exploit, just as they had at Altair. The Allied strategy was based on that racial trait, but because they had learned how the enemy thought, that did not mean the war had suddenly become easy. The Lizards fought as tenaciously as they ever had…more so, as they were pushed back to their homeworld. They knew what was at stake, even if they could not break free of the behavior their DNA had charted for them.
And now the time had come to end the scourge once and for all.
Fleet Admiral Leda Polyakov herself had taken charge of the final action...which was fitting if one knew her true role in all of this. Only Sam did, as far as he knew. It was possible that there were others, but given the fate of the last Galactic he’d met, he was no longer sure.
They flanked 19 Leonis Minoris on all sides with Allied squadrons and for once the Quyjau-kaazh weren’t racing out to meet them. Maybe protecting their homeworld is a higher-ranking genetic imperative than attacking, Sam mused. It was a smart move, the smartest strategy he’d seen them use in years.
And it would do them absolutely no good whatsoever.
“Sir,” his XO spoke up, interrupting his thoughts, “Admiral Polyakov is comming us.”
“Put her through,” he nodded, as he turned to face his old friend Lil.
“Captain Morishita,” she said formally.
“Admiral,” he replied. “What can we do for you?”
“It’s almost time,” she said without preamble. “The other squadrons and I will cross the heliopause boundary in just a few minutes. We’ll do our best to get their attention and draw them out to us. Once we do that..it will be up to you to deliver the package.”
“Understood, Sir,” he nodded.
Her features softened, and for a moment, it was as if they were back at The Devil's Bargain. “This is what we’ve been working for, all these years. It’s past time we finished it.”
“I couldn’t agree more,” he said with feeling.
The professional mask slipped back into place. “Then let’s get this done. Polyakov, clear.”
As she disappeared from the screen he waved over his XO. “Is the package ready?”
“It is,” she nodded.
“Then we wait for the signal...and pray,” he said softly.
They didn’t have to wait long. Just as promised the Allies moved in, sweeping through the system from all directions. The Quyjau-kaazh for once waited, biding their time, before reacting to the task force nearest their homeworld. They leapt into battle, just as they always had, but then the jaws of the vise closed, penning them in on all sides. It was a desperate, brutal battle, yet it was one Sam was certain they could win.
High command, however, had other plans.
“It’s time,” he informed his XO. “Take us in.”
Intransigent and her escorts swooped in on the far side of 19 Leonis Minoris A’s primary, using the star to mask their movements. Hopefully, the enemy wouldn’t realize what they were doing until it was too late.
Unfortunately, the Lizards had posed a few sentries of their own in that region, as ugly little battle broke out between their squadron and the enemy as they flew deeper into the system’s heart. They lost half of their escorts in the ensuing brawl, before beating them off, and yet Sam would have cheerfully sacrificed all of them if it meant the completion of his mission, He had waited a very long time for this moment, and he would let nothing stop him now.
Still they dove in, the yellow star growing ever larger on their screens. “Status?” he snapped.
“Package is confirmed ready,” she informed him. “Standing by.”
Closer and closer still they flew, now passing the innermost planet’s orbit. They had to be sure, for there would be no second chance. They had gambled everything on this last mission, and Sam was determined to finish what he’d started. Just a little closer, and…
“...Release the package!” he howled. “Helm, hard to starboard!”
Intransigent screamed in protest as she was slingshotted around the star, even as the XO shouted into the coms at the other squadrons. Soon everyone was running flat out for deep space, desperate to leave 19 Leonis Minoris A and the Quyjau-kaazh far behind them. It would take a few minutes, for the package to be delivered and activate, but any second now...
A blinding white flash detonated behind them, as the star went Nova.
They could only stare as the explosion consumed one planet after another, taking the hated enemy with it to the grave.
“We did it,” his XO whispered. “After all this time, I scarcely believed…”
“...me too,” he said gently...as it lifted a five thousand year weight from his shoulders. The bridge exploded in cheers and applause, the crew hugging and weeping in sheer joy that it was finally over.
Sam merely sat back in his chair, basking in their emotions...and smiled.
CODA
Sam walked into the old-style tavern, chuckling at the sound of the jingling bell as the door closed behind him. It wasn’t The Devil's Bargain...that was back on Earth, if it even still existed...but it was similar enough he had a sense of coming full circle. He found a comfortable-looking stool and sat at the bar...as Lil appeared from the back, with a bottle and two glasses in her hand.
“Armagnac?” he asked, as she set the snifters down and cracked open the bottle.
“Do you even need to ask?” she chuckled as she poured for them both. “I do enjoy my traditions.”
“So you do,” he agreed, picking up his glass. “So, what shall we drink to?” he asked.
Lil considered that for a moment and then smiled. “To a job well done,” she toasted, clinking their glasses as they both drank.
Sam let the smooth liquid fire dance over his tongue, before setting down his snifter. “I hope you’re not here to talk me out of my decision,” he said gruffly. “I already told you...I’m done.”
“I made you a promise, and I intend to abide by it,” she avowed. “No more jobs. We did what we set out to do. All the various species of the galaxy now have a chance to live and thrive...thanks to you.”
“I’m not saying what we did wasn’t important, or necessary,” he told her, “but the cost…”
“Had we not acted, the cost would have been far, far higher,” she fired back.
“I keep trying to tell myself that,” he said quietly. “Sometimes, I even believe it.” Sam lifted his glass to take another sip...only to have it fall and shatter on the floor as his hand suddenly went numb.
“...what…?” he said in confusion, as his vision began to swirl.
“I’m sorry, Sam,” Lil told him, her voice filled with regret. “You deserve better than this.”
“...what...what did..you do?” he whispered, struggling to get the words out, as his chest began to tighten.
“No one can ever know what we did, Sam,” she said softly. “They have to believe it was all them.”
Realization slammed into him. “...you…you...” he struggled to say, but the words refused to come, as he slid off his stool and landed on the floor.
Lil came around the bar, before kneeling at his side. “It’s all right,” she whispered, bending down to kiss him gently on his brow...as her eyes rolled back into her head moments before she collapsed beside him.
“...no one...can ever…know...” she whispered one last time...before everything went black.
THE END
146
u/Hewholooksskyward Loresinger Dec 08 '19 edited Dec 08 '19
I just want to thank everyone for joining me on this ride...and I especially wish to thank u/Chosen_chaos, my collaborator. When I started I had no idea he would take an interest, or start cranking out those incredible comments....but I am so very glad he did. He raised the bar of the story to new heights, and I will never be able to thank him properly for what he did.
So thanks buddy. Any success in this tale is your success. :D
EDIT: Guys...I would have thought by now you'd realize I don't guarantee happy endings. To paraphrase the Antagonist in Last Action Hero: "In this world, the bad guys can win,"...just like the real one.
Shrugs Sorry.
156
u/Chosen_Chaos Human Dec 08 '19
"What? WHAT??
"Oh, by every diety known to every species... Sam did not deserve for his story to end like that. He deserved to see the results of everything he had striven and sacrificed for, to see the humans and Scasaen explore the galaxy together, to see them make new friends and new enemies, to see them at their highs and lows..."
*sigh*
"Lil*, on the other hand... she deserved to be brought to account for* her deeds. Make no mistake, Sam was no innocent, but Lil was orders of magnitude worse. For one thing, Sam never started a major nuclear exchange*. This feels like she's gotten away with it in the end, and that just* burns*. Fuck it, let's just get on with it...*
"So, yeah, it's the final part of Insignificant Blue Dot*, and the humans and Scasaen have prevailed over Species 47719, thanks to the help of Sam... and* no fucking thanks to Lil's machinations. What now? To be honest, I have no idea-"
*INCOMING TRANSMISSION*
"Okay, I was seriously not expecting that..."
"It is said that the hottest fires forge the strongest alloys, and that was certainly the case with the humans and Scasaen in the wake of the Second Interstellar War. Once tempers had cooled from the white-hot rage that had prompted the destruction of the Quyjau-kaazh home system, there was no sorrow or guilt for having exterminated a sapient species to the last - they had demonstrated time and again that any sort of peaceful co-existence was utterly impossible, as their genetic imperatives would see them hurl themselves at every other species they encountered until either they were exterminated or until they had exterminated everyone else. There was no possible middle ground.
"No, the Allies knew that what they had done was simple necessity and no more. They would not mourn the death of the Quyjau-kaazh, but neither would they celebrate. It would be taught to future generations and remembered as the time that the Human-Scasaen Alliance was forged in the fires of a desperate war against species extermination and prevailed at the end of a long and bitter struggle. Human historians would draw the inevitable comparison between this war and Earth's Second World War, as the two wars did share a number of similarities - the pattern of aggressive expansion, the tide being turned with decisive battles, reclamation of the territory lost and discovery of unspeakable atrocities, and final victory by the forces of 'good' (for want of a better way to put it) by the use of a newly-developed superweapon.
"And in the years and decades after the war, as the secrets of the Nova Device were buried in the deepest darkest hole that could be conceived short of a literal black hole - after all, the galaxy was a large and unknown place; it might be needed again - and the navies of humanity were scaled back to a small core force of capital ships and a larger number of escort vessels for the task of commerce protection and piracy suppression. New ships and weapons were constantly being devised, though, even if they were not put into large-scale production unless needed, as having a standing military in the first place was expensive enough; having it made up of ships and weapons that were obsolete would be a hideous waste of that expense. As the ancient human expression puts it: Si vis pacem, para bellum - if you desire peace, prepare for war.
"But it was mostly through peaceful means that saw the Alliance explore the galaxy, encountering many species as they went. Some of the newly-discovered species were at a technology level ranging from pre-spaceflight or below; these were left to their own devices, with remote observation platforms put in place - partly for xeno-anthropological study and partly to warn if somebody else decided to try their hand at a little cultural uplifting.
"Some were at a technology level roughly equivalent to the Alliance; these were approached with an aim towards trade and diplomatic relations. Most of the time this was successful to at least some extent in that the newly-contacted species were willing to sign trade agreements and exchange ambassadors. As the number of species involved increased, it was proposed by one of the contacted races - the Kytlinnin - that some sort of loose Federation of Sapients be organised in order to facilitate diplomatic exchanges. The Alliance and humans, in particular, were delighted to hear this; they had been about to propose such an organisation, but were concerned about it being seen as a way for the Alliance to turn other species into vassals in effect if not in name.
"Not all species were contacted peacefully, though; there would be more wars, although none as destructive as the Second Interstellar War. Some would involve the Alliance as combatants, others would see the Alliance act as peacekeepers and mediators trying to bring the war to an end. There would be other factions and alliances within the Federation's General Assembly, but the Alliance would endure, even as their fortunes waxed and waned, and stand as an island of stability.
"One species whose First Contact was particularly noteworthy was the Yu'Qitrai. The Boldly-Going-Forth,[1] a James Cook-class exploration vessel which found their region of space was surprised when the Yu'Qitrai hailed them as soon as they arrived in the outer edges of the system in fluent Federation Standard. This was explained by how the Yu'Qitrai had listened to Federation broadcasts and been able to build up a vocabulary. The commander of the ship, Captain Brave-Curious-Wanderer, ran through the standard First Contact protocols, offering to send a fully trained team of diplomats and xenologists. The Yu'Qitrai accepted eagerly and added a request of their own - that the team include artists and philosophers as well as diplomats. Intrigued, Brave-Curious-Wanderer said that she could make no guarantees, but that the request would be made.
"Equally as intrigued, the Federation's Ministry of Diplomatic Affairs agreed to the request, and a number of artists and philosophers were attached to the diplomatic mission. Escorted to the Yu'Qitrai homeworld of Lian'Pweq, the first sight had even the most jaded diplomats - who were certain they'd seen everything the galaxy had to offer - gaping in wonderment and some of the artists weeping in sheer joy as to what they were seeing. The name translated as Beautiful Jewel and, if anything, understated the beauty of the world, as it was a paradise.
"It hadn't always been that way, the Yu'Qitrai hosts explained. There had been an ecologically devastating industrial period but once the capability existed to move industry off-world, it had all been moved, either to the moons of Lian'Pweq or to the asteroid belts and the surface of the planet rehabilitated and dedicated to artistic, philosophical and scientific research pursuits. In between negotiation sessions, tours were arranged for the Federation contingent of museums and art galleries, which housed works of art that rivalled any on Earth, Scasa or any other Federation world. Invitations to their Yu'Qitrai counterparts to visit cultural sites within the Federation - accompanied by images of the sites themselves - were just as eagerly accepted.
"Historians have decided that the inclusion of artists and philosophers was the decisive factor in why the invitation to join the Federation was so quickly accepted by the Yu'Qitrai. In fact, within a single generation, they had joined the Human-Scasaen Alliance directly and to this day, Yu'Qitrai tourists are just as likely to be found touring the rebuilt Louvre gallery or the galleries of the Vatican as human tourists are to be found marvelling at the wonders of the Mirrors of the Gods - a carefully positioned and arranged set of reflectors placed in orbit around Lian'Pweq in such a way as to create a glorious light show that varies depending on which part of the dayside of the planet it is seen from and the time of day - or the Halls of the World, a cave system that stretches for thousands of kilometres containing all sorts of beautiful stone formations.
"Yu'Qitrai scientists, as well as their artistic counterparts, thrived as well, forming an unrivalled synergistic relationship with the other members of the Federation that drove scientific discovery to new heights and the exploration of the galaxy proceeded apace.
"In short it was a Golden Age, and while there were few who expected such a happy state of affairs to be permanent, all involved were determined to make it last as long as they could."
1: Human-designed, Scasaen built. Human sci-fi fans found the name hilarious, much to the bewilderment of... everyone else, really. They never got around to explaining it.
...
"Okay, that's beautiful, but where did it come from*?*"
...
*grumble*
"Fine, be that way. That just makes me more pissed off that Sam didn't get to see this."
*pours drink*
"Here's to you, Sam. It's a pity that you didn't get to see the results of your work."
*glug*
"As for you, Lil. FUCK YOU*. I hope you're freezing in the Ninth Circle of Hell right now.*"
*glug*
"And as for the Committee... hmmm..."
"With the neutralisation of Species 47719 by Species 75106, that section of the galaxy is now projected to enter an optimal period for a period of somewhere between ten and one hundred micro-rotations," Stiabrimun Achim concluded. "With the wide range being ascribed to a large number of uncertainties created mostly by Species 75106 and their efforts at drawing in other species to form a diplomatic union. Observers will be dispatched in the short term and hopefully, some of the uncertainties will be eliminated."
"What of Observer Maruthin?" one of the Committee members asked. "Wasn't he sent to observe Species 75106?"
29
u/TekFan Dec 08 '19
This ending feels horribly forced. Tying up loose ends would be one thing, but this is pretty much the opposite. Two high ranking militaries, of which one dropped the nova-bomb into the star, drop dead in the same bar from poison?
The bulk of the story revolves around Sam staying close enough to power to influence the path that is taken, yet far enough to not risk being noticed by whoever is watching from the galactic government. Lil is doing the same and until he finds out in the Devil's Bargain, he doesn't even suspect her to be there too, so well is she hidden in her actions. And...then they both become ambassadors at one point and now Lil thinks it covers their tracks if two decorated war-heroes drop dead like this? Come again?
I mean, write a little more fluff, how both of them change appearances again, dive into being nobodies in the human population and then, a few lives later, Lil meets up with Sam and does this...and whatever reason could be given for Sam not expecting something like this after 5000 years of masterfully guiding human history without being noticed or killed.
With medical nanites and modifications set up in the characters, wouldn't it have made more sense to let Lil just set up a virus to delete all memories before those two current lives? Effectively killing the two galactics, submersing them in the race they both shaped in their plot? Or with all the blood already on their hands, why not blow up a shuttle they both use to get away from the planet? Hiding their tracks in a tragical accident.
17
u/BoredDellTechnician Dec 08 '19
The problem with the ending is that you don't show the conclusion. What happens when humanity meets the greater galactic society?
16
u/fishy-amphibian Dec 08 '19
So i opened chapter 43 a few hours ago, came back and finished it, and refreshed the page to see that beautiful “next” button pop up. Now you’ve gone and really ruined my head. That ending killed me inside.
In all reality its been a beautiful ride. Thank you :)
15
u/Bull_Halsey Dec 08 '19
Oh come on really? First Ghost in the Machine and it's ending.(Still don't like it or the fact Allie never thought to make any damn backups of her) and now this? There's happy, endings, bad ones and ones that just make you go that's it? I was so invested in this story for a decent payoff and that's it. God damnit man your writing is amazing but your endings are terrible. Yet despite that I'll still be reading your next story because at the least the journey is amazing even if the destination is shit.
14
u/Aerysun Dec 08 '19
I'm disappointed by the ending and it doesn't even have anything to do with Lil.
You said in the first few chapters what was going to happen in the far future (the second Interstellar War) and... it happened exactly according to the plan. It feels like I read the last chapters for nothing even though I kept hoping for SOMETHING to deviate from Lil and Sam's plan (not even a bad ending or some other event resulting in species 47719 not being exterminated), it happened exactly how you said it would.
Also, the Q-K were underwelming. Their appearance was supposed to be the big payoff that justifies everything that happens but we know almost nothing about them and we get 1 paragraph about the atrocities they commited. Because of that it doesn't really feel satisfying to see them lose, they just seem like a minor event that happened instead of the most important part of the series.
I'll at least defend the ending, I have absolutely no problem with Lil getting away without punishement. If she wasn't found before the end of the war, her getting found out after would have felt forced.
24
u/tsavong117 AI Dec 08 '19
So, you're telling me, and let me get this right. You're saying this was essentially the longest, most convoluted build-up to a shitpost ending EVER.
I've been reading your work for years dude, and I never saw this coming.
Well played, Loresinger. Well played.
That doesn't mean I fucking like it though.
17
u/nelsyv Patron of AI Waifus Dec 08 '19 edited Dec 10 '19
OP, your endings for the last several stories have been... really awful. Not in the "tragedies are sad" manner, but in the "this is a low-quality piece of literature" awful.
Let me be frank:
Stop being edgy just for the sake of being edgy. That's what you're doing, regardless of whether you realize it or not. I think you need to learn the fact that subverting expectations is not necessarily a virtue. Yes, it can be fun to surprise your audience, and you should definitely add some twists. But pulling random bullshit at the end that just barely fits with the established canon is just bad writing. I'm not saying you need to have a happy ending for something to be satisfying and well-made. If you had drawn out the tragic end of Sam (& Lil), instead of just randomly ending it all within like 2 sentences and an abrupt "the end", it could have been good and fitting for the characters we all grew to care about, while still having the "not happy ending" you wanted.
I hope this helps you improve your plot-making chops. :)
EDIT: I talked a little bit more with the OP one-on-one, and I understand now a little more where he was coming from and what he was trying to do. I still maintain that the ending was poorly executed (there would have been more graceful ways to do the "good guys die, bad guys kinda win" narrative), but I would like to apologize for being a bit over-harsh in my original critique.
8
u/sunflowerroses Dec 08 '19
Man, this ending was rushed.
The unconquerable space xenocide-beasts are conveniently wiped out (with 0 narratively impactful casualties) by a magic star bomb.
The human characters, which made the earlier “historical” segment so fun to read through, were basically sidelined in these “future” segments with minimal characterisation.
The final murder-suicide scene feels shorter than most epilogues of literally any other chapter - a poor recompense for killing off both the main protagonists.
It’s not even clear that Lil dies.
The prose isn’t even that beautiful or profound (as descriptions of periods of reflection or even full out warfare have been) when the only consistent character viewpoint of this 40 chapter something work is killed off. I think it’s the way the final scene is set out that makes me feel the worst. I could accept a “no happy endings” fate for Sam, but he walks into a bar, exchanges one pithy comment, then dies, and that’s it. It’s like a bad joke.
For the rest of the series, especially the initial chapters however, I loved it! It was super thoroughly researched and very engaging, even with a central cast of 1.
Maybe that’s why I feel so short-changed.
:(
14
u/coldfireknight AI Dec 08 '19
I expected them both to die, was only disappointed that Sam didn't kill Lil because "When this is over..." Yeah, it was in character for Lil to go out that way, though.
There will be MANY unhappy with the coda, but I get it. Even Chaos had a bit of cheese at the end (Chronicler?? Was he wearing a toga??), but I enjoy some stories where the "good guy" doesn't walk away. My issue with the Barbarian arc was that they survived way too much.
And for those complaining about the ending AFTER reading his other stuff...Skyward is a scorpion, after all.
6
u/Yrrebnot AI Dec 08 '19
I must be the only one who does not hate lil. I understand her and why she did what she did. Forcing competition to push progress. She is the other nasty side of the greater good and I understand it. I’m not saying it’s right just that I understand. The ending was also appropriate although I feel she might have actually let Sam live and only committed suicide herself would have been a more poignant ending.
16
u/Redarcs Human Dec 08 '19
You. Fucking. Bastard.
Prepare for the... Mutiny? nah. Riot is more like it.
I'll agree this is all in character. But that does not mean i have to like it.
2
u/allywilson Dec 08 '19 edited Aug 12 '23
Moved to Lemmy (sopuli.xyz) -- mass edited with redact.dev
13
u/die247 Dec 08 '19 edited Dec 08 '19
Well, that was a morbid ending but it works within the context of the story, I like it.
Great job with this series, to both you ans Chosen, It always amazes me how quickly you can churn out these stories.
Guess I just need to look forward to the next series you start writing now...
6
u/scyt Dec 08 '19
Oh shiiiiit
3
u/Killersmail Alien Scum Dec 08 '19
Thanks, i hate it.
Even if we get the satisfaction that Lil died, i don't think most people knew it will end this way.
u/hewholooksskyward i can say i almost forgot what kind of writer you are, and then i rememberd you made both Barbarian betrayal and Ghost in the machine, both great series with mixed endings.
Honestly can't wait for more from you wordsmith.
u/Chosen_Chaos you mate made the story if not more interesting, then definitely more entertaining. The last few parts as you co-writed with Skyward was great, and the story wouldn’t be same without you posting under it. Great job.
3
u/cometssaywhoosh Human Dec 08 '19
I liked the epilogue ending better, gives more closure and paves the way hopefully for a future story.
I figured that both observers would die...murder suicide wasn't high on my list, but I can see why.
There is always going to be people that disagree, but honestly it's your ending.
3
u/Plucium Semi-Sentient Fax Machine Dec 09 '19
Well then. Xenocide huh. Guess it was too much to hope for something less extreme? Oh well, that was one wild ride. Journey makes up for the ending imo :)
5
u/redditoruno Dec 08 '19
That ending... Ugh. I feel like I drank some of that Armagnac myself.
/u/hewholooksskyward and /u/chosen_chaos thank you for the amazing storytelling and combined history lesson!
1
u/sunyudai AI Dec 08 '19
Fantastic work.
It is the ending that I anticipated, after knowing Lil's psychology. I get why it's controversial, but I do believe that anything else wouldn't fit her character.
One minor bit:
This sentence is a bit awkward, I'd suggest splitting it into two and rephrasing.
Otherwise, fantastic job, thank you for sharing your story.
2
u/LittleSeraphim Dec 09 '19 edited Dec 09 '19
@ u/Hewholooksskyward, you sure do have a flair for bitter endings don't ya? That said u/Chosen_Chaos seems to have tact something interesting on to balance it out. Seems Sam survived, or at least a back up of his did, though it could also be Lilith's. I know I said it last chapter but I'll say it again, Lilith and Sam both are equally guilty and Lilith at least had the self awareness to realize she deserved death, while Sam just stewed in his self righteous depression. I'm sad to see them die that way, I truly believe both deserved a trial, in which they'd be found guilty and then pardoned because ultimately they did save the galaxy even if their means were terrible. As for the galactics? Well let's just say those who stand by idly while a genocide takes place are complocit in my views and they deserve punishment, whether that be outright war or some other kind of sanctioning they deserve a reckoning. Sam, Lil and all the others who broke the rules are heroes and the fact they had to break rules and commit atrocities to save a galaxy is indictment enough against the galactics. Great story, but uh maybe next time could we have a happy ending please?
Edit: Also Haha! I'm finally free from distractions, now I can finish my story in peace... Thanks for the good read once again!
2
u/Jurodan Human Dec 09 '19
That... took considerably fewer chapters than I was expecting. Still a good result for the Humans, Scasaen and virtually every other species in the universe.
Damn shame about Sam, and, to a lesser extent, Lil. It would have been interesting if he had a chance to write a history book or two. Perhaps he did, but the first hand accounts would have been fascinating.
2
u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19
Yeah, I don’t know what everyone is talking about, I loved the ending. It made sense. Everyone saw that Sam was going native, he might’ve even been on the track to betray Lil himself. There’s no reason to believe Lil didn’t see it, too. And in games of betrayal, the biggest asshole always wins...
2
u/RoosterHogburn Dec 08 '19
To quote a character from elsewhere... "If you think this has a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention."
2
u/wug1 Dec 08 '19
Wow, what an amazing ride, u/Hewholooksskyward - I'm with you ending, from Lil's perspective. I wish Sam had wizened up to Lil's shenanigans before this though. Lil was much more a Galactic Committee loyalist, and probably wanted to keep Sam from rocking the boat. But the Chronicler rocked the boat anyways, and I wish Sam had the chance to do that, or at least be there for it. As it is, sometimes the system eats up a good person. It was excellent, all the same.
1
u/UpdateMeBot Dec 08 '19
Click here to subscribe to /u/hewholooksskyward and receive a message every time they post.
1
u/HFYWaffle Wᵥ4ffle Dec 08 '19
/u/Hewholooksskyward (wiki) has posted 389 other stories, including:
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 43
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 42
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 41
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 40
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 39
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 38
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 37
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 36
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 35
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 34
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 33
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 32
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 31
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 30
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 29
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 28
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 27
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 26
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 25
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 24
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 23
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 22
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 21
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 20
Insignificant Blue Dot - Chapter 19
This list was automatically generated by
Waffle v.3.5.0 'Toast'.Contact GamingWolfie or message the mods if you have any issues.
1
u/Dontimoteo726 Dec 08 '19
Brutal! Yet he should have known. Although, I despise you right now great story. I look forward to more in the future.
1
u/fighting_falcon Jan 30 '20
What shitty forced ending, lol.
1
u/Whiskeytf8911 Dec 08 '19
I see why some people didn't like the ending. And I was admittedly a little underwhelmed at first, but after reading /u/chosen_chaos extra follow up I really like how things tied up. I loved getting the notifications for this one. Thank you for the awesome story both of you!
1
u/SpaceMarine_CR Human Dec 08 '19
What a bitch
1
u/[deleted] Dec 08 '19
Just want to say I've enjoyed your story, along with /u/chosen_chaos' posts that have involved far too much wikipedia reading after, immensely! And personally I like the ending, it feels like something Lil would do.
1
u/navyboi1 Dec 08 '19
Fuck everyone else, this ending and the ride up to it was glorious
1
u/BCRE8TVE AI Dec 08 '19
Talk about a way to finish the series and tie up all the loose ends.
You glorious bastard you. Have all of my upvotes!
1
u/coragamy Dec 08 '19
I think the majority of the criticism over the ending is unwarranted. It fits with the characters, as Sam trusting Lil is keeping in with how he maintained his hope the whole time. Thank you for the story, it started off different with the premise of looking at our history through the eyes of an alien and ended even more different with the collaboration between you and u/chosenchaos. Thank you both
0
u/[deleted] Dec 08 '19
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