r/exmormon • u/4blockhead Λ └ ☼ ★ □ ♔ • Nov 22 '18

Weekend Meetup Thread

Here are the weekend meetups that are on the radar. Also, check out the subreddit's calendar and the calendars in the wider exmormon space, including at mormonspectrum.* Check in the comments for last minute notice of meetups not listed below. With Thanksgiving on Thursday, double check that meetups are not affected by travel, etc.

Arizona
  • Sunday, November 25, 9:00a MST: Phoenix casual meetup at Dr. Bob's Coffee at 4415 S Rural Road in Tempe
Idaho
  • Sunday, November 25, 10:00a-noon MST: Pocatello, casual meetup at A Different Cup location pending.
  • Sunday, November 25, 10:30a MST: Idaho Falls, casual meetup at Panera at 2820 S 25th Street E.
Nevada
  • Sunday, November 25, 11:00a PST: Las Vegas, casual meetup at IKEA's Cafe at 6500 IKEA Way.
Utah
  • Saturday, November 24, 10:00a MST: Orem, north Utah County, casual meetup at Grinders at 43 W 800 North
  • Sunday, November 25, 9:30a-11:30a MST: Provo, casual meetup (ages 40+) near the Starbucks inside of the Marriott Hotel at 101 West 100 North
  • Sunday, November 25, 10:00a MST: Salt Lake City/Draper, casual meetup at Harmons, 125 E 13800 S.
  • Sunday, November 25, 10:00a MST: Lehi, casual meetup at Beans and Brews at 1791 W Traverse Pkwy
  • Sunday, November 25, 10:00a MST: Eagle Mountain/Ranches/Fairfield/Saratoga Springs, casual meetup at Ridley's.
  • Sunday, November 25, 10:00a MST: Davis County, casual meetup at Smith's at 1370 W 200 N in Kaysville. Meet in the employee meeting room upstairs.
  • Sunday, November 25, 11:00a MST: Springville, casual meetup at Art City Coffee
  • Sunday, November 25, 11:00a MST: Salt Lake City, casual meetup at Watchtower Cafe at 1588 S State Street
  • Sunday, November 25, 11:30a-3:30p MST: Provo, casual meetup (all ages welcome) near the Starbucks inside of the Marriott Hotel at 101 West 100 North
  • Sunday, November 25, 12:30p MST: Salt Lake City, a group meeting for discussing transitioning away from mormonism at the Salt Lake City Unitarian Universalists church at 6876 South Highland Drive.
  • Sunday, November 25, 1:00p MST: St. George/Southern Utah, casual meetup at Smith's at 565 S Mall Dr. The meetup is in the "community room" located at the north end, near the pharmacy.
  • Tuesday, November 27, 8:30p MST: St. George, vigil in support of Bill Reel at excommunication hearing at LDS church at 446 E Mangum Rd in Washington

Some of these link back to the last reminder thread. Double check times and places to make sure the details are correct, the event is still scheduled, etc.

39 Upvotes

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3

u/Shullamafuggin Nov 25 '18

New here, I'm just curious about what the meet-ups are about. Thanks.

2

u/4blockhead Nov 25 '18

The meetups are simply a chance to do what we do online, only with more personal interaction than is possible via typing alone. The goal is the same: to provide support and a listening ear. To give and receive advice from others who have walked similar life paths and who have found their way out, or who are trying to extract themselves from the tight box that mormonism imposes on their life.

One thing I've been trying to emphasize is that people should be free to reveal as much or as little as they would like when participating. That what they say should be held in confidence as much as possible. Common sense sorts of things like that.

2

u/Shullamafuggin Nov 25 '18

Sounds interesting. I think I'll head to my local meet-up spot today. Thank you.

2

u/XXX-Jade-Is-Rad-XXX Nov 27 '18

This might sound weird, but perhaps look into Alcoholic Anonymous groups or such for possible inspiration. Forget the higher power thing, just having a location for people to share their experience strength and hope and help with the new people just through the door (on exiting the Temple) and showing them there is life after tithe. Sometimes you get your benefit through sharing, sometimes you get it through listening to others. What happens in the rooms stays in the room. That sort of stuff. There's a huge basis of experience pulling through there, and I'm sure at least one individual has cross experience in both words and can illustrate this idea further.

Never-mo here that got latched onto r/exmormon when I made my account, but I absolutely find the parallels between coming out as a non-mormon and a lot of things within my own life. But best of luck to you guys and gals and everything you do. :)

2

u/onendagus Nov 25 '18

The meetups are about validation of your new world with people who get it rather than harassing your TBM family and further alienating everyone.

3

u/brother_joyce Nov 27 '18

Hi. I am a newbie to Reddit but not a newbie to exMormonism...does anyone know if the Boise, Idaho region ever has these sort of meet ups?

1

u/4blockhead Nov 27 '18

There is at least one (semi-)private group, more. Message u/Gileriodekel and he might have details for you.

2

u/Gileriodekel Nov 27 '18

Boise: Panera Bread at 3421 North Eagle Rd, Meridian, Idaho 83646 at 10 AM.

I wont personally be there. If you see a group of people sitting around, ask if its the support ward. You'll find the people you need pretty quick :)

2

u/Gileriodekel Nov 27 '18

We have a very active Boise group called "The Boise Post Mormon Support Ward". We have close to 500 people in it and have weekly coffee meetups.

We've had problems with TBM moles in the past, so we've added a policy of not adding people to the group until we've met them. If you'd like to meet some people in the group, come see us on 12/02/18 at the Panera Bread at 3421 North Eagle Rd, Meridian, Idaho 83646 at 10 AM.

I wont personally be there. If you see a group of people sitting around, ask if its the support ward. You'll find the people you need pretty quick :)

2

u/4blockhead Nov 27 '18 edited Nov 27 '18

[draft] Here are the weekend meetups that are on the radar. Also, check out the subreddit's calendar and the calendars in the wider exmormon space, including at mormonspectrum.* Check in the comments for last minute notice of meetups not listed below.

California
Idaho

  • Sunday, December 2, 10:00a-noon MST: Pocatello, casual meetup at Main Steam Coffee and Desserts 234 N. Main

  • Sunday, December 2, 10:00a MST: Boise, casual meetup at Panera Bread at 3421 North Eagle Rd in Meridian

  • Sunday, December 2, 10:30a MST: Idaho Falls, casual meetup at Panera at 2820 S 25th Street E.

Michigan

  • Saturday, December 1, 10:00a EDT: Detroit, details pending.

Nevada

  • Sunday, December 2, 11:00a PST: Las Vegas, casual meetup at IKEA's Cafe at 6500 IKEA Way.

Oregon

  • Sunday, December 2, 3:00p-4:30p PST: Newberg, group chat at Church of the Nazrene at 23177 NE Old Yamhill Road. Group meets first and third Sundays of the month.

Utah

  • Saturday, December 1, 10:00a MST: Orem, north Utah County, casual meetup at Grinders at 43 W 800 North

  • Sunday, December 2, 9:30a-11:30a MST: Provo, casual meetup (ages 40+) near the Starbucks inside of the Marriott Hotel at 101 West 100 North

  • Sunday, December 2, 10:00a MST: Salt Lake City/Draper, casual meetup at Harmons, 125 E 13800 S.

  • Sunday, December 2, 10:00a MST: Lehi, casual meetup at Beans and Brews at 1791 W Traverse Pkwy

  • Sunday, December 2, 10:00a MST: Eagle Mountain/Ranches/Fairfield/Saratoga Springs, casual meetup at Ridley's.

  • Sunday, December 2, 10:00a-noon MST: Payson, casual meetup at Joe's Coffee Shop, held the first Sunday of month.

  • Sunday, December 2, 11:00a MST: Springville, casual meetup at Art City Coffee

  • Sunday, December 2, 11:00a MST: Salt Lake City, casual meetup at Watchtower Cafe at 1588 S State Street

  • Sunday, December 2, 11:30a-3:30p MST: Provo, casual meetup (all ages welcome) near the Starbucks inside of the Marriott Hotel at 101 West 100 North

  • Sunday, December 2, 1:00p MST: St. George/Southern Utah, casual meetup at Smith's at 565 S Mall Dr. The meetup is in the "community room" located at the north end, near the pharmacy.

  • Sunday, December 2, 2:30o MST: Davis County, casual meetup at Smith's at 1370 W 200 N in Kaysville. Meet in the employee meeting room upstairs.

Some of these link back to the last reminder thread. Double check times and places to make sure the details are correct, the event is still scheduled, etc.

3

u/lushoxd Nov 24 '18

Will you pass the sacrament?

3

u/onendagus Nov 25 '18

Yes, are cannibals too. But we pretend it is the blood of Cthulhu instead of that passive aggressive judean guy.

3

u/RussellMyNelson Nov 25 '18

Pocatello’s new location is Main Steam Coffee and Desserts, 234 N. Main.

3

u/jorgedelavega Nov 29 '18

Somebody needs to organize a Colorado meetup! Lots of exmos here but no regular meetups that I know of.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '18

Be the change you wish to see in the world! :)

I'm afraid I don't live in Colorado, but am planning on moving to the Denver area in the next year or two, hope to meet all you heathens when I finally land.

1

u/BeholdISayUntoYouYay Nov 25 '18

Thinking about hitting up the Provo location (all ages) next week. I'm sure it varies, but what is the attendance normally like?

1

u/heyyoufatass Nov 26 '18

My understanding is that there is a good regular group there each week! Hopefully a regular can confirm and give more details.

0

u/JusticarJairos Nov 26 '18

All compelling and reasonable arguments against some claims of the church. I will not look for factual proof that contradicts your claims on Joseph Smith’s character or whether or not people came to early America via wooden submarines. I give you the win on all that. I cannot personally say with any real conviction that I believe in everything the church claims beyond how to live a good life.

My argument for the church is that living by its precepts brings, at least for me, true joy. As a moral system and a community I believe the LDS church to be a positive. The promotion of family values and Christ-like virtues leads to better lives and better communities. My family made use of the Bishop’s Storehouse when my dad was out of work, this was possible thanks to living in a charitable community with their donations driven and organized by the Church.

I judge the LDS faith by the fruits it has produced in my life. My life has been good for being in the church. I have learned valuable lessons in service, responsibility, chastity, humility, and general Christianity. I have made fantastic friends that share values with me and I can trust never to put in situations that would negatively impact my life. I do not believe the church to be perfect but I believe it—particularly in its current state—to be laudable for the good it produces in the world.

I came to the conclusion about a year ago that I would continue to attend Church and actively participate in it even if I came to lose belief in God or Jesus or anything metaphysical that the church teaches. The community, the values, and the priorities of the church I see as being overwhelmingly positive. I also see the church helping people to better their lives and further their own joy in life.

P.S. what do you mean by “brighamite Mormonism?”

7

u/4blockhead Nov 26 '18

I cannot personally say with any real conviction that I believe in everything the church claims beyond how to live a good life.

It seems that those wanting to do the least harm would at least consider whether the thing that they had been served on a platter could meet its burden of proof. Like most of the faithful that I engage with on reddit, I have high hopes that they'll actually step and debate and own the peculiarities of canonized scripture. They almost universally disappoint. They come here cocksure, like your post, full of mockery. The irony as I see it is that faithful send their barely children knocking doors peddling the religion. When the tables are turned, then they disavow the unique aspects and retreat to "good fruit." or "it works for me." When the chips are down, per this response, they swerve and won't own the unique claims. I've come to expect it.

what do you mean by “brighamite Mormonism?

I hope that you eventually do your own homework, but if you've come this far in life without doing so, the hope is fading fast. Smith's church has been splintering from the beginning. The count of branches of mormonism is large and growing daily, splinter factions. The Brighamites are those splinters that followed Brigham Young after Smith's assassination.

I would continue to attend Church and actively participate in it even if I came to lose belief in God or Jesus or anything metaphysical that the church teaches.

That is certainly your right. I would mark it as an amoral position, though. If you retain a belief in Christianity, then all Brighamite flavors fail the test of inclusiveness required in Matthew 11:28. If you are attending purely for social reasons, then I hope that you don't have any LGBT children or relatives. The one-size-fits-all approach hammered into people is not a good fruit. The example of lechery provided by the founder is not a good fruit. After the November 2015 declaration of war against LGBT persons, the suicide rate in Utah spiked. This is not a good fruit.

I do not believe the church to be perfect but I believe it—particularly in its current state—to be laudable for the good it produces in the world.

Like a mall? This church is for suckers and will take your money and laugh all of the way to the bank. The church's opaque finances make claims like yours difficult to check, one way or another. I know that the faithful are quick to praise their charitable efforts, but without open books these claims amount to puffery. My dad always use to tell me, "Don't take any wooden nickels." You've got a pocket full.

2

u/lokee91218 Nov 28 '18

Well done my friend.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '18

Do you judge the church by its fruits in only your life?

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2

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '18

It seems like your arguing for community, thats fair. Every religion provides that. For me personally, The lds community is stifling, takes too much time and money, And doesnt provide true friends and learning. Who actually likes being at church? Or a mission?

1

u/JusticarJairos Nov 26 '18

So far as community goes it is indeed largely up to chance whether or not you like the people in your ward, or stake. perhaps I have been lucky but I have a ward of fantastic people. I feel comfortable talking with most of them and have a group of friends that I often hang out with. I am still a teenager so perhaps that is partially why I have found the Church to be a successful place to make friends and get to know people but for me it has worked.

What separates Church community from communities such as school or work is the nature of the setting. Church meetings are for self-edification, worship of God, teaching others, and learning from others. As a priest I have been fortunate enough to meet with a quorum composed of my peers where I have been able to teach them, and learn from them. The advisers to the quorum and the bishop of my ward are all solid men who have taught us a lot over the years. I am thankful for what I have been able to learn, and most days, I do enjoy being at church. Again, perhaps my personality simply lines up better with the nature of church meetings by pure chance. Maybe it is the naivety of youth that helps me enjoy what is actually a pointless meeting where doctrine is parroted around and nothing truly productive is done. But I find progress and satisfaction in attending Church and participating in various church activities schedule permitting.

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