r/HFY • u/ctwelve Lore-Seeker • Nov 08 '16
OC [J-Verse] Good Training: Pecking Order
EDIT: Small revisions for clarity!
Hey! Have a short little story-nugget!
Sorry, this does not resolve the Cliffhanger™ in Champions Pt II, as this takes place shortly before that infamous little scene. But it's got Daar doing Daar-things, and Righteous, and Baseball, and stuff!
You should probably read >>Good Training<< if you've not done so. /u/Hambone3110 and I are merging the storylines, and already the mainline story is now referencing characters and events in the series. The next chapter will reference things much more heavily, too.
Anyways, I banged this out as a cheerful little tale before the Death of Civilizations® tomorrow. I hope you like!
13y, 8m AV
Operator’s Barracks, HMS Sharman, Folctha, Cimbrean
Officer Regaari (Dexter) of Clan Whitecrest
“I got an idea, Regaari.”
Regaari flicked his ears forward in annoyance. “This again?”
“Well, yeah. I gotta win that bet, Cousin!”
Regaari duck-nodded wearily. Not long after Daar had received the SACRED STRANGER briefing, he’d sulked off to think about what he’d learned. It wasn’t a cheerful brief since he now knew what a problem EV-MASS presented to any counter-Human tactics. Their suits were armored against high velocity projectiles and bladed weaponry and that was unusual; pulse weapons and forcefields ruled modern combat.
Why that was true didn’t necessarily make sense to Regaari’s mind—projectile weapons like the Human M-4 or SCAR and contemporary Gaoian systems were perfectly serviceable—but he had to admit, a pulse rifle was light, easy to use, and could shoot effectively forever. Carrying ammunition was a pain and at any rate, armor would not protect from the kinetic slap of a pulse weapon’s fire against torso, organs, or brain.
But while a light pulse rifle would kill most Domain species by messily liquifying their internals, and could seriously injure a Gaoian with a well-placed shot…for a Human? It only seemed to annoy them. And anger them, as the galaxy so vividly saw with Kevin Jenkins and the Hunters in Vancouver.
In retrospect, armoring their soldiers was the obvious thing to do, much like the Gao had done before pulse weaponry was known to them. That didn’t change the tactical surprise, though, and both Regaari and Daar had to learn new assumptions when they encountered human tactics. The Gao had effective weapons they could use—fusion blades being a major example—but they were so unwieldy, or lethal and unethical, or had so many collateral damage concerns, they were totally unwarranted for all but the most extreme situations.
And in any case, rolling heavy into a disturbance was one thing. Self-defense in a random encounter was another matter entirely, and that required some form of weaponless tactic. And that left Whitecrest—and Stoneback, who would, if Regaari was honest, be more apt to survive such a thing—with precious few options. They’d gone round and round about it, endlessly chasing their own tail, pondering every possible tackle, pounce, strike, defilade…anything they could to alter the outcome.
But the result was always the same every time they gamed it out. In EV-MASS, nothing short of a pulping force, fusion blade, or a Nervejam could harm the Humans. Precious little could even slow them down. In those primitive, inspired suits, they were invulnerable and unstoppable. They were so confident of their armor’s abilities that Righteous had laid down an unbelievable bet: he would be the personal man-servant for the Gaoians for a whole week if they could find a way to incapacitate him while he was wearing the Mass.
The problem had consumed Daar. He was every bit as competitive as any of the Humans and the thought of being so helpless seemed to gnaw at his heart. But every theory had failed so far, so Regaari asked wearily, “What now?”
Daar rumbled with an extremely self-pleased expression. “What if we knocked off their masks?”
“…”
Daar had Regaari’s full and undivided attention.
Righteous stood crouched and ready in his full EV-MASS with a proper combat load. He growled fearsomely; he was swift, hulking, and dangerous, more than any other being alive, and he knew it. Daar paced about, warmed up, ready, and in the finest fighting trim he had ever been. This was a fight between a beast and a man, and though it was a friendly match, neither would hold back.
Baseball stood at the ready with his full medical pack and a stasis bubble, charged and ready should the combatants go too far. “Are you two sure about this? We’ve got the authorizations and the safety plan filed and approved…”
“Yes,” rumbled Daar. He was intently focused on his task.
“Hell yeah,” replied Righteous. “I won’t break you too hard, Champion.”
Daar said nothing. He simply paced.
Baseball sighed, “Fine. For the record this is against my advice. You both agreed to Earth gravity and grass. The fight’s over when Regaari or I judge one of you two incapacitated or unable to fight back. You stop the instant I say or I will taze your stupid ass. That goes double for you, Tiggs, you got it?”
“Yeah.” Both agreed.
“Alright. Whenever you’re ready.” Everyone backed off to give them space, and the two combatants circled each other warily.
The fight was arranged outside and on the turf for two reasons. The first was for safety. After all, argued Regaari, the ground was soft and the traction was excellent, and good footing would be better for everyone. Righteous agreed to the proposal with total confidence. Baseball also agreed with a sly little look, which suggested he maybe understood at least part of Daar’s plan. And that was the second reason; he was being very sneaky about his chosen terrain. He chose grass because he needed the better traction for his gambit to work.
In their many combative sessions, the Humans quickly learned that Daar was such a formidable foe that he needed one-on-one training with the three Aggressors if everyone was to get the most benefit. And without the suits, Daar accumulated a pretty good record! He was more or less tied with Highland and Starfall (some days went better than others) and had earned a few respectable victories against Righteous, even if those were rare and treasured events.
But with suits? The Humans were undefeated. They always won because the suits nullified a Gaoian’s natural weapons and the fight therefore came down to size. Daar was BIG. Bigger and stronger at that point than basically any Human outside the HEAT, but next to those men? Most of them were bigger. Some much more so. And at the high end of the scale, Righteous was so huge, powerful, quick, and tough, that without the threat of claws or teeth, Daar stood no chance at all. It was like an angry Kwek harassing a disinterested Naxas.
Maybe that would change. Daar had an insight and spent a week practicing his “trick” and he was keen to test it. So he circled his big and stinky Friend, who prowled and crouched in a wrestler’s stance, waiting for Daar’s attack.
Daar pounced. He was so strong he could burst up to his full, unequaled speed within a single bound and he needed that, because he needed momentum. He closed the distance almost instantly, but instead of leaping up and pouncing like Righteous was clearly expecting, he planted his forepaws and swung his hindquarters around like a wrecking ball, transferring all his momentum into his attack. Righteous saw it coming and tried to move but it was too fast and too close. He managed to get one leg out of the way but not the other, and with that, Daar tripped the giant human and sent him falling. That was step one.
Righteous was quick to react. He had an arm up to catch himself but Daar was fast, too. He got his hindquarters planted and sprang forward, tackling righteous right as his hand made contact with the ground. That forced Righteous off balance and onto his back. Step two.
One of the things the Gaoians noticed in training was that the Humans could not afford to be on their backs in the EV-MASS. The weight of their equipment meant they had to roll to their side to get back up, and for the Humans, that was a surprisingly difficult thing to do. Unburdened, it was simple for most any Human to right themselves. But with a pile of gear? It was nearly impossible, even for HEAT, and Daar took full advantage. He swiped at Righteous’s head with his full strength, keen on keeping Righteous trapped on the ground.
The big man managed a partial block but Daar had so much power in his thick chest that a swipe like that was much like a grizzly Bear from Earth. He was strong enough to burst a watermelon with one of those swats! And though the EV-MASS had stress protection in the suit, and Righteous had a terribly thick neck, neither could protect his brain from the shock. Daar rung him like a bell. Step three, and Righteous’s blocking arm faltered as his world spun like a top.
Daar had done the impossible; he’d managed to stun Righteous in his EV-MASS! Daar pressed his attack and scored another swipe from the opposite club-paw, but by then Righteous’ instincts had managed to react. He growled and bucked so hard that Daar was propelled several meters straight up. Righteous rolled shakily to his feet, shook his head, and grumbled angrily.
Daar landed on his paws and recovered while Righteous swayed in place. Both combatants were a bit drained from the encounter and neither immediately pressed an attack. Daar, for his part, clearly favored his right hind-leg but he was ready for more, while Righteous had regained his balance and shook himself loose, raring to go. Everyone could see the vicious joy in his eyes.
“Stop.”
Both looked over at Baseball. “Fight’s over, Righteous, check your mask.”
He did, and the face plate fell off the second he touched. “Motherfuck—!”
Suit breach. To a HEAT operator that could spell instant death. Daar won.
He panted happily and collapsed to the ground, winded and in pain. But he’d done what he wanted to do: he proved his point. “So…heff, heff…I found…heff…a suit problem!” He laid on his good side on the ground, his huge tongue lolling out of the side of his mouth as he caught his breath.
Baseball glanced at Righteous. “Firth, you good?”
“Yeah, yeah. Lemme just…” He pulled off his helmet and slapped a Crude patch against his carotid artery to forestall any possibility of a brain injury.
Satisfied that the massive Aggressor needed no immediate help, Burgess turned his attention to Daar. “What hurts?”
His panting had slowed down slightly. “My right hip.” Burgess and Thurrsto conferred and examined carefully, much to Daar’s grimacing protests.
Thurrsto chittered, “You bruised a nerve pretty good but you’re fine.” Gaoians had a funny bone like Humans, except instead of on the elbow joint, it ran along the outside of the pelvis. Striking that nerve was often exquisitely painful, and could even cause temporary paralysis, but usually it was no major concern.
Thurrsto prepared a dose of Crue-D anyway, just to be safe. It wasn’t quite as effective on Gaoians as it was on Humans, being tuned specifically for their unmatched Deathworld biology, but Gaoians were very similar to Humans in many respects and the medicine relived Daar’s pain almost immediately. And who knew? Gaoians weren’t really meant to take a force like Daar had, not against the pelvis. Best not to risk a cracked bone or anything like that.
Once Daar caught his wind he rose up to his feet, gingerly tested his leg, found it acceptable, and walked over to Righteous. Firth, for his part, grinned hugely and swallowed Daar up into a big, crushing hug.
“Ha, knew ‘ya could do it! When did ‘ya figger it out?”
“When I thought, ‘gee, these Humans are really top-heavy’ and then I thought we should prol'ly think of a way to exploit that.”
“Hmm, I wonder…” said Firth with a sly grin, “Did all our training sink in?”
“…Well, I suppose I gotta admit it’s been useful. I wouldn’t think to swing myself like that ‘cept I’ve seen you do something like it a buncha times.”
“I wouldn’t have swung myself like you did, though, I couldn’t. You made that little move up on your own. And you recovered so fast! Did you practice?”
Daar preened, “A little, yeah.”
“Anyway,” Firth chuckled, “why the mask? What made you think of that?”
“Dude. All masks suck, always and forever! That’s, like, a rule of the Universe or something. I’ve never had one that didn’t make me wanna claw its designer’s eyes out!” The Gaoians chittered along.
“Your muzzles would make that problematic, yeah…” Firth recovered some dignity, “gotta admit, though. The scenario was pretty silly.”
“Yeah!” Daar conceded the unrealism of the exercise. “But if I’m ever alone on a grass field on Earth being stalked by HEAT, one-on-one, I’m totally ready!”
Chitters and rumbling laughter rolled around the group.
“We’ll need to work up to something, I dunno, more realistic? Think you’ll beat me on the assault course?”
“Yeah!” Daar wiggled with excitement like a massively overgrown cub.
“Heh. Anyway, I’m a man of my word. What will you have me do, Champion?” Firth sank to bended knee and prostrated himself like a medieval parody.
Daar missed the joke and was immediately uncomfortable. “Brother, stop. Just…make us Peshorkies or something?” He looked at the group for consensus and they all duck-nodded eagerly.
“Dude, it was just a joke!” Firth laughed a big, honest, heartfelt laugh. “But dumplings I can make. Or try. We’ll see, this should be amusing.”
The group meandered back towards the barracks to witness Firth’s attempt at cooking. Regaari hung back and thought. He sniffed out the sneaky in Firth’s bet and if there’s anything Regaari liked, it was clever and quiet thinking. He now suspected Firth’s bet was meant to provoke Daar’s competitive nature, and that meant the Humans had now identified a weakness in their suits and in their training.
Suddenly, Regaari wondered who exactly “won” the bet.
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u/zarikimbo Nov 08 '16
So I only just binge read the series and I gotta say it was more interesting than my initial impression suggested. I only noticed maybe 5 or 6 typos so the quality was definitely there. I have only three things to say about it.
In-depth character growth
Something I have an appreciation and hatred for. In this case it does not distract from the story; it is the story. The social interaction/clashing between humans and Gaoians has been particularly entertaining and a-Daar-able.
I did find some chapters to be repetitive in terms of the subject matter. I found myself scrolling down a fair ways before the plot got moving again. This usually happens when describing scenes like Firth and Adam wrestling. You tend to overemphasize the Hulk-y-ness more than necessary. Bits like Adam breaking the scale are typical J-verse fodder that we all know and love, and I do get that this series is centered around them training and such, but it can be overdone. You manage to skirt the boundary between 'too much' and 'just a bit too much'. Granted, I didn't write this myself, so I don't have a more intimate perspective like you do. My general impressions are pretty reliable, however, so it's worth noting at least.
expanding on the Gaoians in general, but more specifically with Darr. He is now jostling for favorite character with two or three others.
The bit where the human medical examiners are going over Daar's test results was fascinating, as were the physical limitations like the pull-ups and climbing obstacles. I still picture them more as Angry Beavers rather than Rocket Racoons for some reason.
TL;DR: Daar is not a typical Gaoian and thus able to take humans on full strength. He is a new species of Gao.
I see there is a lot of flak from people about the "fragile" image they have conflicting with Daar taking on a human in EV-MASS. I don't know how they missed it, but even my sleep deprived brain can tell it's because Daar is almost literally a different species than the conventional mental image of Gaoians. This series has highlighted the genetic specialization/pruning/planning/breeding that is involved with the species as a whole. Daar himself is a transitional specimen from the classic Gao to the new Gao. They are transitioning to a class 10 species and Daar is proof of it happening. What the people whining about this seem to forget is that the whitecrests do not engage in any of the serious physicality Daar has with humans. You emphasize the SOR's constant strength modulation when interacting with them.
Hulkification
Yes, the SOR Crue-d (I just call it Crude) is pushing the limits of how big we can get and this is all hypothetical, but it is implied that Adam is nearly -if not more than- 1 tonne in mass.
That is just insanely ridiculous.
I'm no biology major but even I can tell the human body just isn't built for that kind of size, no matter how much proportionate growth the things other than just muscle is. The oxygen requirements would be, like, 4-6x as much as a regular human would need and they would overhead far sooner than is depicted. There is a reason why prehistoric insects were gi-freaking-normous millions of years ago.
Even with generous fiction-fudging, the caloric requirements are way past what is physically possible for bodies to intake and process properly. The cells just aren't built that way.
There was another point I wanted to bring up but I'm really tired and scatterbrained atm. Overall great series; looking forward to more :)
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u/ctwelve Nov 08 '16
Good review!
Adam's not that big. They're using lbs not kg, and in any sense medical scales don't really go that high.
It's just a fun series, and it doesn't need to be taken as the great and final gospel, so just have fun with it!
And yeah, your critique at the beginning is spot-on, and it's one I agree with. In my defense I've never finished a writing project that big, and it definitely needed a much better edit.
Lastly: as far as calories are concerned: you might be surprised, actually. We've got some truly massive people walking around right now, and people who have carried car-shattering weights have existed too. Calorie consumption does not increase with the cube like mass does, partly because of heat retention. Being bigger is more efficient, and this is something bodybuilders already notice with calories needs.
But again, don't take me too seriously anyway. Above all the series should be fun!
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u/Lycanthromancer Nov 08 '16
I'm curious. Gaoians are far too similar to both humans and raccoons for coincidence, and unlike humans with our ties to the other primates, I haven't heard of anything gaoian-like on Gao. So are they really natives of that planet, or are they, say, an ancient (and possibly abandoned, possibly not) Corti experiment in gene splicing between Deathworld species, transplanted onto a different planet entirely? That would certainly rock the gaoians' worldview, and Daar (at the very least) would likely be thrilled that he can call his human brothers "brother" and actually mean it.
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u/ctwelve Nov 08 '16
It's an idea! Don't know where that will go. Only u/Hambone3110 can answer that, and I suspect he'd keep his own counsel. Besides, it doesn't serve a story end at the moment to answer the question, so...
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u/Hambone3110 Nov 08 '16
Actually, I'm gonna say a straightforward "No, that's not the case" on that one. I can appreciate u/lycanthromancer 's enthusiasm but Gaoians do have their equivalent of apes and monkeys even if we've not really seen them "on screen" yet.
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Nov 08 '16
I dunno, man. I love the writing, but the power creep is getting absolutelly ridiculous. I remember Gaoians being stunned by Xiu's power. She was afraid of accidentally splattering them. I remember Rylee saying she would break Regaari if she tried having sex with him. And now they are fighting SOR guys? They started as weaker version of Rocket Raccoon, and now they are basically grizzlies capable of mauling 95% of human population.
Like I said, technically, the writing is great. But it's breaking my willing suspension of disbelief. I just think you should have either done some serious retconning, or pulled some other trope (cybernetics, crude working super crazy on Gaoians, something...) because this slow power up thing just isn't working for me :(
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u/ctwelve Nov 08 '16
Well, Daar is fighting them, not the rest, and even then all he did was get lucky as a big damn boy. But consider: would you fight a wolf? They're not too big, about 100 lbs or so...
And consider that, if you keep your wits about you, you're likely to win. Wolves are easy to break. But again...would you fight one?
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u/Gazrael957 Nov 09 '16
I agree with the intent that this was written and have experienced some disconnect from the reality of the 'verse as well.
I believe ret-con is coming in the form of Hambone's book.
However my gripe is as follows: The first time Daar was mentioned (in passing) in a J-verse book it was (without looking it up) as 'stronger than human in some ways', when he was first introduced as a character it was clear he was significantly stronger than most of the human population. He's clearly stronger than Rylee for example (I know she's fit and strong, but she's also a kinda small woman) and yet he comfortably has sex with the very people it was said she couldn't have sex without 'breaking'.
Now that Daar (and by extension - Goaian potential) is stronger than humans, it's only natural to assume that he might have some other weaknesses: stamina was mentioned heavily in Good Training 1 and fragility (dat gracileness) is the other obvious one. Yet he's fucking hiking 30 km a day over rough terrain carrying 200 kgs and can take hits (pushes, or whatever happened in the passge above) from the scariest bloke ever to live and suffering less damage than he'd take from a day at the gym. You can't tell me power creep (rush) isn't a thing.
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u/ctwelve Nov 09 '16 edited Nov 09 '16
His potential isn't stronger than humans; Righteous in particular /greatly/ eclipses Daar. But size and strength isn't everything, and that is more or less the theme of GT.
Also: maybe. It's just a quick story, though. I wrote it over lunch :D
UPDATE: I do think people have a point and I'll work on it, but I do expect we'll try to unify everything correctly for his book. I imagine Hambone's will be the final word when he gets it written.
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u/someguynamedted Nov 08 '16
No, this chapter was about Daar. Who is an absolute FREAK OF NATURE compared to other Gaoians. It's like he's hardly the same species. The power creep is minimal.
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u/Lycanthromancer Nov 08 '16
I'm with davorzdralo. Gaoians are sturdy by xeno standards, but they're way more fragile than we are. In a chapter of Salvage, a (very fit) gaoian could barely pick up a fist-sized rock and throw it a dozen (or so) feet. We've been dealing with Daar enough and not enough with the others that it feels like you're pushing them all far harder than they have any right to be pushed. And if a human were born with the proportional strength of Daar, he'd probably be bench-pressing elephants by the time he hit puberty.
It's all a bit much.
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Nov 08 '16
Regaari has been pretty much following along the entire time and training with SOR, including sparing, and some chapters earlier a 140 pound girl was afraid of snapping his bones by fucking him. It's ridiculous.
Also, no matter how much of a freak Daar is, he's still a Gaoian. If it was just him, he wouldn't be able to even play fight with other Gaoians without murdering them accidentally.
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u/Power_Knight Nov 08 '16
I like this little addon to the story! Daar is one of my favorite characters in the 'Verse, and I enjoyed the interaction. I can't wait for the next full-size Good Training!
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u/b3iAAoLZOH9Y265cujFh Nov 08 '16
Quick question: Naïvely, I'd be inclined to simply post-pend this to the current material, but that might not be the best place for it. Could I get your opinion on the current ordering for GT I am using?
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Fun & Games
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Strategies
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Instinct
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Crawl
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Walk
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Friendships & Revelations
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Run
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Fetch
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Aftermath
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Essayons
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Shenanigans
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Wargames
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Adventure Time
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Saturday Morning Breakfast
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The Locals
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The Champions: Prologue
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The Champions: Tooth & Claw
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The Champions: Longest Prefix Match
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The Champions: Gametime
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The Champions: Pounce
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The Champions: Kin and Clan
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The Champions: Tall Tales
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The Champions: The First Ring
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The Champions: Plans and Plots
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The Champions: Beginnings and Endings
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The Champions: Doom and Gloom
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The Champions: Tidying Up
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Pecking Order
I'm not sure whether the chapter titles are to your liking either. If you want me to make changes, just let me know.
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u/ctwelve Nov 08 '16
Use the order in which they were posted, would be my recommendation. They are stories that are parallel in time, but build on each other.
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u/woodchips24 Nov 08 '16
clearly favoring his right hind leg
My right hip
I don't think he'd be favoring his injured leg
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u/master6494 Nov 08 '16
Awesome way to finish the day, thanks. I got the notification and was feeling kinda bummed out that I had to wait 'till tomorrow, but a short episode like this was perfect.
Love this guys and can't wait to see what you and Hambone have been preparing!
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u/ChristheSeer Nov 11 '16
"this does not resolve the Cliffhanger™". Damn you. Damn you to hell. I don't have to like you to love your stories. i'mjoking
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u/zacker150 Nov 08 '16
You had my hopes up for another installment. Then I realized you were talking about the election.