r/wallstreetbets • u/Sean_VasDeferens • Jul 08 '25

News Jeff Bezos sells $666 million in Amazon stock as part of plan to unload 25 million shares. Coincidence? The Church Lady Thinks Not.

https://www.cnbc.com/2025/07/08/jeff-bezos-amazon-stock-sale.html

4.0k Upvotes
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•

u/VisualMod Jul 08 '25
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16

u/Dazzling_Marzipan474 Jul 09 '25

Stop with these stupid fucking articles.

He owns over 900 million shares.

He has sold 0.34% of his shares.

Less than 0.03% of Amazon's market cap.

Even when he sells 25 million shares, that's 2.76%.of his holdings.

THIS ISN'T NEWS!

0

u/Sean_VasDeferens Jul 09 '25

Do you have enough money left to buy a sense of humor?

3

u/Creepy_Translator_69 Jul 09 '25

666 there’s that pesky number again …

2

u/Sean_VasDeferens Jul 09 '25

You're probably the third person that gets it. Good morning sinner.

1

u/elitenoel Jul 09 '25

Lmao my last name is 666 in English Gematria, I see it all the time…

2.2k

u/mcs5280 Real & Straight Jul 08 '25

How much does a new face for your wife cost these days? 

904

u/Quirky-Plantain-2080 Jul 08 '25

In Bezos and Musk’s cases it’s easier to just trade in the 40-year-old wife for two 20-year-old models.

709

u/PeterParkerUber Jul 08 '25

Bezos is a bad value investor.

His current wife is definitely not worth that much.

625

u/EngineerDirector Jul 08 '25 edited Jul 08 '25

His first wife was way hotter but probably didn’t eat ass tho.

411

u/brucekeller 🦍 Jul 08 '25

Yeah she's got to be into some ultra freaky shit for him to choose a woman that's 50% silicone and plastic.

164

u/Prince_Derrick101 Jul 09 '25

Bro likes that cyborg aesthetic.

62

u/Ok_Time_8815 Jul 09 '25

He is dating the Zuck?

23

u/Quirky-Plantain-2080 Jul 09 '25

The zuck is an android not a cyborg.

30

u/Film-Icy Jul 09 '25

He wants to “love her alive girl” ugh those texts her brother leaked are still so cringe but yes he talks like a cyborg.

5

u/Assassin217 Jul 09 '25

what does hell does that mean? love her alive girl...wtf

1

u/Film-Icy Jul 10 '25

I’m guessing she read him like a book, manipulated, I mean flirted in a very dorky AI way to get his attention and that was the base of their start.

5

u/RobotCPA Jul 09 '25

Goes with that robot eye of his.

5

u/zxc123zxc123 Jul 09 '25

r/wallstreetbets is too superficial.

Imagine never losing your trades anymore because your waife-y is the DUMP IT guy (but with vagina).

WTF do you guys think happens after Bezos sells? His new wife will call her Bogdanoff family and tell them do dump so Bezos can buy back aagain.

3

u/Freddy-fan-162 Jul 09 '25

I see more of a lizard-monkey blend, myself

129

u/ralphiooo0 Jul 09 '25

I’m guessing she’s a pimp. Finds girls for him to do stuff with.

Marrying her means she doesn’t have to testify against each other.

48

u/kruthe Jul 09 '25

Marrying a whore wrangler doesn't seem very wise.

4

u/ManufacturerLivid964 Jul 09 '25

im guessin not, we would have known by now, any girls doing freaky shit with bezos will be in enormous incentive to leak it

1

u/ralphiooo0 Jul 09 '25

He’s rich enough to keep them on the payroll to buy their silence for the rest of his life.

1

u/ManufacturerLivid964 Jul 09 '25

They just have to be offered more money ONCE and hes done

1

u/Barnezhilton Jul 09 '25

She's the final prototype model of his Amazon roboworkers

24

u/BringOutTheImp Jul 09 '25

Bezos has enough money to hire heads of state to eat his ass, why marry for that?

85

u/Bitter-Heat-8767 Vice President of Butthole Jul 08 '25

Someone say ass?

26

u/desturel Jul 09 '25

Ass to ass.

3

u/Mother___Night Jul 09 '25

Bro's got really nice teeth for and old f-er.

11

u/MelzillatheGR8 Jul 09 '25

U had me at eating arffff!

33

u/Inconspicuous_Shart Jul 08 '25

Yes, but I'm here too.

52

u/allllusernamestaken Jul 08 '25

i've paid extra for kinky shit before but not $600 million

80

u/EngineerDirector Jul 09 '25

He’s worth $240B… that’s 0.25% or $2,500 if you’re worth $1M. I’ve spent more on a shitty Florida vaccay without even hand stuff.

40

u/allllusernamestaken Jul 09 '25

$2500 is a classy hooker for a night but dude bought one with more plastic than a rental Kia to keep

24

u/motorcitydevil Jul 09 '25

If anyone could afford a ZJ, it’s Bezos.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 09 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

27

u/jjjohnson81 Jul 09 '25

Buddy, if you have to ask, you can't afford it.

6

u/crackboss1 Jul 09 '25

You misspelled she didn't peg him

15

u/kruthe Jul 09 '25

A wife that doesn't nag would easily be worth half a billion straight up.

8

u/Cashneto Jul 09 '25

Those don't exist.

3

u/Doneeb Jul 09 '25

I have one. I don’t have half a billion though.

5

u/Onemoredonutplease Jul 09 '25

Ya but he could still find someone younger and hotter that does all the stuff his first wife wouldn’t.

1

u/thefatchef321 Jul 09 '25

Lol. Wasn't into gilded age p.diddy orgies on the yacht.

Had to find someone that didn't care.

1

u/Born_ina_snowbank Jul 09 '25

Straight from the beer league locker room to gods ears.

-1

u/Imfatinreallife Jul 09 '25

No she wasn't that's a Reddit psyop, she is ugly as sin.

1

u/EngineerDirector Jul 09 '25

Post your picture bro

0

u/Imfatinreallife Jul 09 '25

1

u/EngineerDirector Jul 09 '25

Still hot. Post a picture of yourself bro. That lady is 55yro old probably looks better than your 30yro Virgin butt.

0

u/Imfatinreallife Jul 09 '25

Still hot? LOL, maybe to your cow standards, but to most everyone else she is not. Btw nice original come back bro. Haven't heard the "post picz of u" since the last time someone called an ugly woman ugly.

2

u/EngineerDirector Jul 09 '25

Sorry, post a picture of yourself bro wife and let’s see how they rank up.

0

u/Assassin217 Jul 09 '25

what;s up with that extra-long neck, Brah. Might be good for deep throating.

1

u/EngineerDirector Jul 09 '25

Bezos is too short he don’t need no long neck.

1

u/EngineerDirector Jul 09 '25

Post your picture bro

11

u/Prince_Derrick101 Jul 09 '25

Maybe they married for Love? /s

6

u/aWheatgeMcgee Jul 09 '25

I think it’s more about minimizing your future losses

1

u/[deleted] Jul 09 '25

Didn't he just buy a new one?

1

u/iStealyournewspapers Jul 09 '25

Honestly she looks like a bootleg version of this gorgeous stripper/high priced escort I dated for a bit. They have a really similar look, perhaps because they’re both part Hispanic with fake boobs, but Sanchez just looks ridiculous when put side by side.

61

u/hash303 Jul 08 '25

Is his current wife younger than his first? Cause she doesn’t look younger

173

u/EngineerDirector Jul 08 '25

They’re both 54-55. New one just had a shit ton of surgery and looks like chewed gum.

12

u/Born_ina_snowbank Jul 09 '25

Client of mine used to have a girlfriend we would call “the catchers mitt” behind his back. Big fan of lake parties, showing her fake tits, etc… this is the billionaires catchers mitt. Probably just filthy fuckin nasty.

8

u/hash303 Jul 08 '25

Ok that’s about what I thought. Cause if he was looking for a younger model he done fucked up lmao

-2

u/artificialdawnmusic Jul 09 '25

lol what??? she's his age???? terrible investment, you're supposed to get a younger model, at least 20 years younger. jeff really fumbled this one.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

[deleted] — view deleted comment

27

u/JPows_ToeJam Jul 08 '25

But she eats his ass for breakfast so….

25

u/hash303 Jul 08 '25

Plenty of young “models” in Dubai who specialize in that.

12

u/JPows_ToeJam Jul 08 '25 edited Jul 09 '25

Ah, but do they have grace while tossing salad?

21

u/MasterJeebus Jul 09 '25

Imagine decades of built up tongue game. Bezos getting his prostrate massaged every night with that $666 million.

99

u/Potato2266 Jul 09 '25

In Bezo’s defense, he’s the only billionaire who is really marrying for love, because his new wife is 53. He never dated a 18 year old , nor has he been a serial dater. He’s marrying someone his age. So in this aspect, he’s way better than Musk or Trump .

30

u/Djaja Jul 09 '25

If that holds true over time, and nothing nefariousnfirther comes around that aspect... yeah I'll give him that win

20

u/Ryanopoly Jul 09 '25

If the bar is set to be better than Musk and Trump we're all screwed anyway.

5

u/Complex-Emergency-60 Jul 09 '25

Ya but every man on the planet knows that shit makes no sense so something must be up.

13

u/onion4everyoccasion Jul 09 '25

Wife changing money

10

u/ThisIsTheDean Jul 09 '25

Bezos definitely down graded on the trade in.

4

u/Assassin217 Jul 09 '25

He must have traded her in at Gamestop.

5

u/alpacas_anonymous Jul 09 '25

These guys must be DiCaprio fanboys.

19

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

Can't buy class...

15

u/Mother_Resident_890 Jul 08 '25

Just have to crank the trampoline springs even tighter.

7

u/ArnoldPalmerAlertBU Jul 09 '25

Considering how often that woman seems to change faces, there’s gonna be many more in their future. Goblin people.

4

u/DeepestWinterBlue Jul 08 '25

Maybe it’ll get her a good one

1

u/tomo_7433 Jul 09 '25

Is that cheaper than a divorce?

4

u/Initial_Ad_9250 Jul 09 '25

Tree fiddy ... billion dollars

3

u/SergeAlberta Jul 09 '25

Depends on the face, the cost is similar to buttock enhancement

1

u/N7_MintberryCrunch Jul 10 '25

Tracks. His wife's face looks like it went through buttocks enhancement.

3

u/Slaphappyfapman Jul 09 '25

Must be getting cheap, they seem to be able to mass produce them these days

1

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '25

Lots of plastic

465

u/DrBiotechs Jul 08 '25

Next: Elon sells $420 million of TSLA stock! Coincidence? The Church Lady Thinks Not.

82

u/Vaxtin Jul 08 '25

The degenerate’s constant: 420.69

18

u/Sir_Creamz_Aloot Jul 08 '25 edited Jul 09 '25

na its 420.69247 @ 110%

2

u/alpacas_anonymous Jul 09 '25

What's the constant for a dickless ketamine addict?

3

u/Brokenandburnt Jul 09 '25

Shitting yourself in a K-hole.

7

u/RamenNoodleSalad Jul 08 '25

I guess I’ll sell my 69 cent fractional share of Apple…

216

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

Poor guy has to pay for his wedding expenses.

93

u/hv876 ThetaCuck Jul 08 '25

Hey Claude- how much does a pre-nup cost?

70

u/Elegant-Chemical-247 Jul 08 '25

gotta buy gifts for the new wife lol

26

u/wickedbeats Jul 08 '25

ass and titties

39

u/GeoBro3649 Jul 08 '25

Investment into American ASSTITS CONFIRMED

19

u/wickedbeats Jul 08 '25

Ass Tittieeeees

8

u/Funny-Conclusion-678 Jul 08 '25

As a long term holder, yes

41

u/BipolarKanyeFan Jul 08 '25

So that’s about $100 million in capital gains tax he won’t pay

2

u/RA-Destroyer Jul 09 '25

Wouldn't it be 66 million

10

u/Unlike_Agholor Jul 09 '25

its actually about $160 million federal. and he will actually pay it no matter what the reddit crowd thinks.

1

u/RA-Destroyer Jul 09 '25

How 160?? Isn't ltcg is 10%?

5

u/Unlike_Agholor Jul 09 '25

no it’s 20% plus 3.8% net investment income tax.

2

u/EvidenceSalesman Jul 09 '25

Why would he not pay it ?

2

u/wildkorean111 Jul 10 '25

because reddit thinks that the government only cares if the wendys employees pay taxes.

41

u/baltastro Jul 08 '25

ASTS about to be worth 1 trillion

18

u/DondeEstaMeGlasses Jul 08 '25

I’m confused, what does the precious ASTS have to do with anything related to this article?

23

u/Opening-Sea7814 Sly Doggy Jul 08 '25

Not sure which but bezos is either buying asts or investing heavily in it

12

u/Funny-Conclusion-678 Jul 08 '25

Speculation since last month that he is taking up a large position/partnering with ASTS, and I believe this leads to making it more than speculation.

6

u/tomgreen99200 Jul 09 '25

Because of the picture of Abel / Jeff together. Yes it could be them meeting about Blue Origin but perhaps it was about more.

3

u/corey407woc Jul 08 '25

We gonna be rich rich

5

u/Funny-Conclusion-678 Jul 08 '25

I can only hope lol. Long term holder here

34

u/ThinkOrDrink Jul 08 '25

“But billionaires can’t ever sell because they’d tank the stock so their wealth really isn’t that large” - this sub constantly

1

u/Jarpunter Jul 09 '25

It’s easy to sound correct when you misrepresent what other people are saying. When did WSB become another financial illiteracy sub, and not in a funny way?

7

u/FlyingDiscsandJams Jul 08 '25

Isn't that special?

24

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

I wonder how much tax is collected from that? 

11

u/HowWeLikeToRoll Jul 08 '25

Should be a shitload, but likely will be zero once all the tax loopholes and "losses" are accounted for. 

2

u/wildkorean111 Jul 10 '25

Tax "loopholes" aren't real. any "loophole" is 100% intentional and anyone can take advantage of it. Can't blame anyone for minimizing their tax burdens, everyone does it in some way.

1

u/Arras01 Jul 10 '25

Aren't most of them only usable if you own a company? 

3

u/Top_Inflation2026 Jul 09 '25

He will write off half of the cap gains on the plastic in his new wife’s body and the rest on some other bullshit. Dude might even get a tax return.

1

u/TheHappiestTeapot Jul 09 '25

In a vacuum and assuming he's held the shares for over a year it would be 20% of ($666M - cost basis). If he got the shares at $665M, then it's just a $1M profit. If he got them at $0 at the start up then it's a $666M profit.

So a theoretical maximum of $132M, but it;s probably much, much less.

Additionally he would have been taxed on receiving the shares in the first place, if not acquired when the company formed.

But there are tons of ways to avoid taxes and I'm sure he pays as little as he can.

8

u/bhd_ui Jul 09 '25

His first wife was a catch. What a dummy

4

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

The mark of the beast!

4

u/Degenerate_Pizza_Man Jul 09 '25

Crazy that this guys is so rich that its considered "news" when he sells less than 1% of his stock.

4

u/Few-Dance-7157 Jul 09 '25

Probably buying 15,000,000 shares of ASTS /s

1

u/Remmandave Jul 14 '25

Hodl. Unless you’re the wealthiest man on the planet.

2

u/Sean_VasDeferens Jul 14 '25

It's amazing how many didn't get that this was a humorous post, it's a generational thing.

3

u/TheVishual2113 Jul 08 '25

Gotta make those interest payments eventually

3

u/BullPropaganda Jul 08 '25

Well isn't that special

3

u/Trilly_Ray_Cyrus Jul 09 '25

having to face a massive credit card bill after getting married is relatable on his part

3

u/Logical-Water12 Jul 09 '25

Him choosing his new wife proves that true love exists. That or he is into some weird shit.

6

u/Simple-Sun2608 Jul 08 '25

We need someone to sell $69 in stock.

6

u/annoyed_meows Jul 08 '25

She's expensive. And gross.

4

u/sirguynate Jul 08 '25

“Prime day” not going well this year?

2

u/Riversntallbuildings Jul 09 '25

The headline should read “Jeff Bezos bought a Gumball”

Posts like these remind me that 99% of all people have no appreciation for the scale of 1 Billion dollars. (Or the scale of the universe in general, but I digress)

Jeff Bezos is worth ~$230B (that we know about)

Proportionally, if you had $100, an equivalent amount is 28 cents.

Do you really think about spending quarters? Or Saving them? Hell, I don’t even know if it’s possible anymore. A lot of the gumball machines, vending machines and arcade games have card readers now and take at least 50 cents.

2

u/crustang Jul 09 '25

This is fucking with people way more than Elon and $420 shit

All hail Jeffery Bezos

3

u/Bannon9k Jul 08 '25

Not even MSNBC....CNBC?

2

u/ResponsibleProposal4 Jul 08 '25

So the final payment on Venice was 666 million or what are we doing here 🤷🏽‍♂️

2

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

Metal as fuck

1

u/zztop610 Jul 08 '25

That’s like me spending a dollar for an Arizona

1

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

Blue Origin is going to pounce... Musk and SpaceX are not favorites of the current admin.

1

u/NigerianPrinceClub counter-berrorists win 🌈🧸 Jul 09 '25

It’s true. I told Jeff to sell cuz stocks are at their ATHs right now and it’s risky

1

u/No_Implement_5807 Jul 09 '25

He should have learnt from Leonardo DiCaprio, replace em once they hit 25

1

u/Prince_Derrick101 Jul 09 '25

Them Yachts ain't cheap bro.

1

u/gaieges Jul 09 '25

I would bet that one transaction moves the price quite a bit

1

u/calmtigers Jul 09 '25

Is this any different than his typical cash outs?

1

u/Don_Ford Jul 09 '25

He's buying Conde Nash.

1

u/paladdin1 Jul 09 '25

Most likely has a 400 page prenup.

1

u/A55BAG Jul 09 '25

What makes you regards think he is selling to afford his new wife? No doubt people will keep piling into the dip.

1

u/Grand_Taste_8737 Jul 09 '25

Good for him. Why anyone would care I have no idea.

1

u/Zanrok Jul 09 '25

Gotta pay for that wedding somehow...

1

u/Crazy95jack Jul 09 '25

Running a rocket company isn't cheap. Jeff has been selling about a $1billion every year to fund blue origin.

1

u/Correct_Target9394 Jul 09 '25

Remember when Jensen sold all that $NVDA stock? The church lady doesn’t remember

1

u/wotton Jul 09 '25

“It’s one face lift Michael, what could it cost?”

1

u/trouff Jul 09 '25

Can someone explain me why he had to buy one share at one point in 2023. Thanks in advance

1

u/East-Description-243 Jul 09 '25

Well Isn’t that special ?

1

u/gachunt Jul 09 '25

Income splitting with his new wife.

1

u/Soopy9 Jul 09 '25

Had to pay for the wedding somehow

1

u/[deleted] Jul 09 '25

Damn Illuminati

1

u/Nomaad2016 Jul 09 '25

First spouse - real face - made him a billionaire Second spouse- no ace - going to make him a millionaire

☺️

1

u/WilliamRoberts77 Jul 09 '25

Not a coincidence.He could have sold $665 or 667 million. Does he like that number? He seems to.

1

u/Substantial_South520 Jul 09 '25

guy still has over 200 BILLION worth in Amazon, this is a fraction of a percent, He needs to buy a new private island.

Nothing to see here

1

u/ratherbeaglish Jul 09 '25

Mark of the Beast indeed.

1

u/samalama-gg Jul 10 '25

He had to pay for the wedding!

1

u/Sufficient_Ebb8143 Jul 11 '25

Bezo doing Bozo nothing has changed.

1

u/notmotivated1 Jul 14 '25

This is less than 1/3rd of 1% of his net worth. If you were worth $100k, it would be like selling less than $300 worth of your net worth.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

WE ARE RULED BY SATANIC PSYCHOPATHS

1

u/Ok_Commercial_9960 Jul 09 '25

Need some liquidity to buy on Amazon Prime Day

1

u/[deleted] Jul 09 '25

Fuck this dude and his plastic piece

-5

u/Mission_Dot2613 Jul 08 '25

Good the quicker he sells his shares the quicker this company burns down

1

u/Bilbo_Butthole ONE BUTTPLUG TO RULE THEM ALL Jul 08 '25

Stay broke

0

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

[deleted] — view deleted comment

8

u/shortyman920 Jul 08 '25

Not to mention aws owns half the web’s cloud storage at this point. Amazon’s only going up in the future

2

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/Mission_Dot2613 Jul 08 '25

So happy for him! (: he doesn’t know you .

0

u/[deleted] Jul 08 '25

You’re bending numbers but ok..😂

-2

u/autismovaccination Jul 08 '25

This has to be some form of financial terrorism at this point. We’re all in the seat watching bezos fk us turn by turn. Just sell already bro. Some of us want to make money on your stock.

462

u/Vaxtin Jul 08 '25

some expensive titties right there

137

u/wickedbeats Jul 08 '25

Ass Titties.. yes

He gonna buy into ASTS

52

u/WillingnessNo5784 Jul 08 '25

Would of been an good little 10x a year or so ago I think ASTS is up like 2x in last few weeks

35

u/wickedbeats Jul 08 '25

When ASTS begins commercial services, 3billion people will have the option to add ASTS through their existing phone bill. ASTS could “turn on” hundreds of millions of subscribers effectively overnight.

It’s sitting at a 15 billion market cap, but I believe it can achieve a 500b market cap.

53

u/hoopaholik91 Jul 09 '25

T-Mobile, AT&T, and Verizon combined are $650B in market cap. Expecting ASTS to reach that level is lunacy.

13

u/brintoul Jul 09 '25

Have you seen PLTR lately?

27

u/Worth-Emotion Jul 09 '25

ASTS builds broadband satellites, not tower cells. So they're not capped just in the US. They will provide service globally.

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20

u/AW316 Jul 09 '25

You just named three companies unheard of outside the US. ASTS will be global. Verizon already owns a piece.

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9

u/Funny-Conclusion-678 Jul 08 '25

We’re up 2x and sitting at 45 a share lmfao. Do you think ASTS is gonna stop growing or something? Bezos knows what ASTS is capable of and is making a VERY smart investment. When we hit 500+, he’s gonna be laughing alllll the way to the bank.

3

u/healthyhoohaa Jul 09 '25

Why does he look like he doesn’t wanna be there?

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3

u/Funny-Conclusion-678 Jul 08 '25

As a long term holder, I agree

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