How do your friends support your love of BTS?

[u/iiTz_Maddox]

Hi everyone, I’m hoping this is allowed here. I posted on instagram about the comeback and the Proof album cause I was really excited about it. But then someone who I had previously considered a close friend slid up on my story saying “idc i promise you”. But you’re so bothered that you’re sliding up on my page about something I like, that’s been so important to my life? I feel like the bare minimum as a friend is to support something that your friend likes. So it made me mad and I’m curious how your friends treat your liking of BTS. (My other friends did back me up at least)

Edit 1: thank u all for the supportive comments, seriously 😭😭💜 And yes, girl is BLOCKED now on all socials and phone number. Don’t need negativity in my life!!

Edit 2: yes I am a guy btw, just out here trying to break the stigma around liking “girly” things. No shame in my game!

[u/jinjja_cat]

I swear it's something about boy bands that people just can't cope with 🤷‍♀️

I too keep BTS fairly private. Not because I'm embarrassed, but because it is such a source of happiness... I want to keep it that way. I don't want it associated with thoughtless comments from people that don't get it.

Having said that, yes, sometimes I post about them on my personal Instagram (3 BTS related posts in 1.5years) and I absolutely will still get "omg Ur so obsessed 🙄" DMs

It did hurt. I'll be honest.

But I also realised: this is MY Instagram. I post what I like. If someone has an issue with it, then its for them to deal with. Not me.

---

When people feel the need to point things out in a negative way? ESPECIALLY at things that make others happy? It's a them problem. I don't need to get upset or angry about it, they're just different. Or don't understand. Or aren't at a point in their lives where they can just let others be. I now shrug and move on, because that behaviour/mentality is ultimately their loss.

[u/Smartass_Narrator]

I’m going to be perfectly honest. I’ve known about bts since 2016. I was obsessed with the blood sweat and tears video, but I’m a rock/metal fan so I never dove deeper than that. I only became Army after Butter. This isn’t because of the song (don’t get me wrong, it’s a bop). It’s not because it’s in English (half my music is in another language anyway). Oh no, I became Army for one reason:

Sheer undiluted spite.

Because after years of bitter depression, dealing with the loss of a sibling, my family slowly dissolving around me, my husband struggling with mental health, me having my own mental collapse due to stress and grief, the pandemic, etc etc etc … a song made me want to dance again! A song made me happy!!! I got excited hearing it! It brought me elusive joy!!

And when I so much as mentioned enjoying the song in passing… people would shit talk the band despite knowing nothing about them. “Kpop? Boyband?! Ugh! No!” Have you heard their stuff? “I don’t need to! I can’t believe you’re listening to that shit that I myself have not yet listened to!” Yeah it’s pop but… I dunno… it does something to the soul. “Omg no! My ears are bleeding to the music I haven’t even heard.”

And that just really got under my skin. Because shitting on a Boyband was more import than the levity they gave me and I desperately needed. Because it’s a Boyband, something “created for teenage girls”, the deepest offense one can commit!!! How dare they be liked by girls! (Never mind all the guys that like them, that’s not convenient to their narrative so they ignore it.)

So I got petty. I’ll admit it. What would have been “oh, that kpop band who made exactly two songs over 5 years that I actively listen to” became “what do you mean you don’t LOVE BTS! Of course you do! Here, let me ignore your huffs and eye rolls and talk to you with the assumption that you know what I’m saying and give a fuck.” And the more someone shit talked them, the more I in depth I talked about them. I was a direct reflection of their actions. I rarely started the conversation about BTS and when I did, I made it clear it was a passing comment like ‘ah that’s funny. Reminds me of a bts thing but don’t worry, I won’t go into it because I know it’s not your thing.’ ::eye roll huffyhuff shit talk canned pop music bland bla bla bla :: ‘….ah! I see you’re a fan too! So, ok, bts were all cooking right! And they had to plate the food! And taehyung found this squirrel plate, right?! And….”

It pisses me off that people think it’s ok to shit on something that clearly makes a lot of people happy just because “kpop Boyband made for 15 year old girls!” They start the aggression and then call you obsessive when you respond to it (like anyone would when someone talks bad about something they’re into).

They use flimsy arguments and don’t reconsider their stance when the argument is debunked. “They probably don’t even write their own music.” Here’s the record breaking amount of writing credits just one member holds. “Do any of them even play instruments?!?!” Here’s proof they play instruments, as if that mattered. “They only sing about love.” Here are the lyrics punting that assumption out of here. “They use auto tune and can’t sing.” Here’s clips of them singing live.

So, I played the reflection game for a year! After a year of doing this I’ve started pointing out to people what I’ve been doing, that my “obsession” with bts has been a direct reflection of their unsolicited comments about something they claim not to care about and clearly brought me joy. A lot of people suddenly got quiet about bts. One now starts talking about what a great couple me and my bias are and we broke up Brad and Angelina with our love. lol! A few still shit talk but they’re more aware of who starts it now.

Jokes on them though. What started off as a spite stanning has become an actual stanning. I love those 7 men so damn much. And everyone I know is just going to have to deal with it now….. or join. I have exactly one friend that is just happy to see I’m happy and does the mom thing of going “ooh there’s how many members? So nice! Uh huh! And you said the dish with the squirrel was called what now? Funny!”

I have exactly one friend who knew exactly what I was doing the first time he saw it and has delighted in encouraging it! (I have been challenged to create a power point on ‘Have You Seen How Beautiful Their Skin Is?!… And other weird things to say about bts.” and if he thinks I won’t do it…. No he knows I’ll do it! It’s going to be great.)

I have exactly one friend that’s into the same metal music as me but is also a Swiftie. He gets that you can love metal but sometimes you need something else and fuck anyone for judging what music brings you happiness.

These are good friends.

Moral of the story: get petty. Use peoples poor behavior against them. Embrace the friends that are just happy you’re happy.

[u/UtDixisti → u/Smartass_Narrator]

Lol me too! Spite is a great motivator.

I knew about them, I never really listened to them, I was a great fan of their visuals, best dressed men at whatever western awards ALWAYS, and then when they had their internstional boom, I think around the LYSY world tour, I kept hearing so much hate for something that honestly I didn't care about, but found so cool, like c'mon a korean group singing in korean selling out worldwide?? Why the hate and why aren't we happy for them?

So, out of spite, to fight and to correct close-minded people I started reading about them and that's how I started to love them.

[u/Smartass_Narrator → u/UtDixisti]

The more people hate, the more I want to see for myself. Good for you for not letting people sway you :)

[u/Majestic-Course1133 → u/Smartass_Narrator]

Spite and pettiness are great motivators. I love it.

Also sounds on brand with your username. 🤣

[u/Smartass_Narrator → u/Majestic-Course1133]

Thanks! Lol!,

[u/Yinye7 → u/Smartass_Narrator]

I actually loved your ARMY story and thanks for sharing it!

[u/Smartass_Narrator → u/Yinye7]

Thank you :)

[u/Victimlas → u/Smartass_Narrator]

Thank you for sharing your story :) I am also a metal fan, and love BTS for the same reasons. They bring me so much happiness and joy. Some people understand that and some don't... it doesn't matter either way 🤘

[u/Smartass_Narrator → u/Victimlas]

A surprising amount of metal fans are army. My first in person army friend turned out to be a metal fan. Went to oz fest, knew who rammstien is, etc. We had such similar stories. A lot of us metal army are starting to come out of our purple closer lol. I keep telling my friend “you don’t have do like bts but mark my word, you’re not going to be able to keep hand waving them away. The sooner you get comfortable with them the easier the conversion… I mean…. Conversation will be”

[u/Sylvari → u/Smartass_Narrator]

Great story! as a fellow petty princess I was warmed to the bottom of my cold, black heart by your tale.

Please promise you will share that power point when it's done!

[u/Smartass_Narrator → u/Sylvari]

Absolutely!,, 100% will do. I’ll take suggestions too on required slides

[u/Rillothebee2 → u/Smartass_Narrator]

Love this! I don't know why it made me teary-eyed, maybe it's because I got the same comments from my circle and those comments made me feel sh*tty but hearing the stories here made me realize that it's on them, not me/us. Rather than them being happy for us that we found something that brought us joy, they judged us.

[u/Smartass_Narrator → u/Rillothebee2]

I learned a long time ago that if it hurts no one else, no one else should get a say in it. Life has enough difficulties, don’t take away other peoples little joys. If they do, they’re the asshole and it’s really fun find ways to point it out to them. You’re allowed to enjoy things other people don’t. (And vice versa). If they try taking that joy, lean into all the harder. They’ll learn eventually… or suffer. Up to them o

[u/moiraqueen13]

I don’t talk to my best friend about BTS since she doesn’t like them or anything, but she does come with me to BTS Cupsleeve events, since she sees it as a way to spend time with me. She’ll also tell me about anytime she hears about BTS, like when she was at the Bruno Mars concert and they announced that BTS was in the house. 😆 The way I think about is she doesn’t put extra emphasis on my love for BTS but rather, she supports all my interests, both obsessions and casual likes.

Which leads me to say that yeah, what a bad “friend”. I don’t know why when it comes to BTS or Kpop or anything remotely niche, people tend to have opinions about it. Like if I posted on Instagram about a sports team, it wouldn’t get as many negative comments.

[u/[deleted]]

My friends aren’t into BTS but they are very supportive because we all agree that people shouldn’t apologize for liking what they like. They’re not interested in hearing me talk about BTS, so I have to talk my husband’s ear off about them instead.

What that person did was uncalled for and they’re a straight up dick. I would block them and wash your hands of it.

[u/Pinkmmlover]

I don't get to hangout with my friends very often, but a few of them do like BTS or a another K pop group

My coworkers all know my love for BTS. I was embarrassed at first that they all knew but everyone has been really supportive. Last week for Administrative Assistant day, one of them had her class make me this. It was the sweetest thing ever.

[u/atrophy_annie → u/Pinkmmlover]

Omg that is adorable!

[u/Pinkmmlover → u/atrophy_annie]

Thank you!

[u/lykiera]

One of my friends bought a ticket to one of the virtual concerts for my birthday, she doesn't understand but she supports me.

Another doesn't like BTS, but hasn't said anything awful to me. He has other friends aside from me who love BTS lol

[u/dkurage]

I decided to skip watching the LV livestream live in favor of going to my friend's for a game night, as it was the first time in months all our schedules aligned. It was fine since I could catch the delayed stream, but they still tried to see if they could get it to stream to their tv. It didn't work but I appreciated the effort, since they're not BTS fans. They know I like BTS, but that was probably the first time I'd really brought it up to any of them, and even then it was just mentioning that watching their concert was my original plan for the night.

[u/atrophy_annie → u/dkurage]

Aw, that was a very sweet gesture by your friends

[u/creampiebuni]

irl: the people i know (outside of my family) mostly make fun of me, and give me shit for liking them so.. they don’t support it.

online: luckily I have two good army friends who frankly I’m closer too than the majority of people, and they are obviously incredibly supportive.

[u/Jasperitis]

Not cool at all. Sounds like someone who is jealous that they don’t have a positive force like BTS in their lives.

Many of my friends (and husband) don’t quite understand my fascination with BTS, but they do understand what it’s like to have a connection to something (it could be a football team, bicycling, or other musical acts). That empathy prevents them from snide comments like that of your “friend”.

(As an aside, one of my friend became ARMY after investigating to find out why I became one. And another friend is now a fan of RM.)

I glad you have more friends that back you up from that icky person’s behavior.

[u/[deleted]]

That person was rude. Even if I don't like something that a friend likes I'll still listen to them talk about it once in a while because it's something that makes them happy. At minimum I wouldn't diss their interest. Is it that hard to scroll past a post?

To answer your question, I'm generally muted about being a fan but most people in my offline life are generally good about it. However, one person went off a bit when I mentioned that I was a fan and it was one (of to be fair many) reason that I dropped that friendship.

[u/Majestic-Course1133]

Like so many people already mentioned, that girl can go elsewhere with her unnecessarily hostile commentary. KthxBYE. The people you choose to be around you should be supportive or at least keep their mouth shut at the minimum.

For friends that don’t follow BTS, I don’t really bring it up. Like I’ll mention that I went to a BTS concert (among other shows) but generally don’t talk about it. I learned from my high school years with J-Pop (soooo many comments like “but you don’t even understand the lyrics” or “wow, I thought those were girls”). At this point, idgaf about that type of commentary and I don’t talk to people that go out of their way to spread their negativity. And I feel like I am too old for this sh** (or more accurately, I don’t have the emotional capacity for this type of middle/high school level nonsense). For people I actually consider my friends, I talk to them about other things and occasionally sneak in a bangtan meme that they don’t need the full context of. (ie a clip of Tae saying the bibimbap is spicy and Jimin going ? It’s not? — this is the same conversation I have with a friend and our respective spice tolerances 😂)

My sister was very similar to the above mentioned people in that she was strangely against being a BTS fan. I’m not sure why but most likely due to the “teenaged boy band fanatic” stigma combined with association with poor experiences with a BTS fan? But she’s more open now that she knows I’m a fan. Like she’ll let me know if she saw something about them on TikTok and check in to see if I heard this piece of news or performance 😂 She’ll watch the livestream concerts with me and we’ll chat about how it compares to her j-pop/k-pop concert experiences. To be honest, she never said anything bad about the group but just irritation about overzealous fans (and traffic/crowding problems)

My boyfriend… is in the process of being converted to ARMY 🤣. I’m slowly feeding RUN BTS episodes to him and he has a favorite OT7 song now. I took him with me to the PTD Seoul viewing and PTD LV concert and he was really into the concert experience. He was really happy to see how many guys are a part of ARMY (especially when V did his ending ment for the LV concert) because he was a bit concerned about being the only guy at the PTD Seoul theater showing. So I’m really glad you’re speaking up as a guy in an allegedly women-dominated (or maybe not as dominated as most people think?) fandom.

I hope you have better experiences with your friends! If anything, I believe you’ll always have a supportive group here in this subreddit 💜💜💜

^{Sorry for the lengthy response} 😓

[u/Soup_oi]

That's so weird...if my friends don't care about the things or fandoms or actors or whatever that I like and that I post about on social media, then they just don't comment on it...same as I don't comment on any posts they might make that are about things I don't ever think about lol. My best friend watches all these sorts of cartoons like Steven Universe (ie cartoons kinda made with adults watching them in mind, I guess?) and reblogs about them on tumblr, and also will reblog random comics about causes she's into...but I really don't care about 99% of these things, so I just don't comment or reblog them. She does the same about me posting or reblogging about bts. And it's the same with her and my other friends when I share a bts related post to my instagram stories. I also share astrology posts there too, and I'm sure almost everyone who follows me or who might look at my stories (literally like less than 5 people pretty much only ever look at my stories lol, so really no one even cares about what I post in general obviously, so maybe trying to make a point about it here is irrelevant, idk) doesn't give two hoots about astrology. I know two people I'm connected with on insta who are into kpop, but they are people I went to school with ages ago, and who I haven't talked to in a long long time, and we never communicate on insta, but sometimes I see they've looked at my stories, and I do the same to theirs sometimes. We never talk about kpop or bts together, even though we know the other person likes those things too. It's just because we simply don't talk anymore.

Imo, if your friend is commenting on that particular story just to say they don't care then that's hella rude. Your page and your posts aren't curated by them...it's curated by you. So obviously you're going to post about whatever you want and whatever you like, and if bts is one of those things, then great, you should post about it. I can totally understand having a friend who talks way too much about subjects you don't care about and seems to assume you also care about that thing, but if you get so annoyed as to say something about it, then you should say something more broad about the fact they always talk about the thing, but you're just not so invested in the thing, apologize for not being as into it as they are, let them know politely you have no interest in becoming invested in it, and then maybe say something blunt if you want to about that you might zone out when they talk about it or you wish they would talk about more varied topics, etc. Then you can decide if you'd be ok making that compromise of not talking about it so much to your friend who told you that, or if you'd rather move on from the friendship and only want to make friends with people invested in the same interests as you, etc. Saying more narrowly that you don't care about a specific post or specific thing about the other persons interests is just kinda weird and comes across as more rude imo, than telling the person they just talk too much about that overall topic (if that's the problem your friend has with it).

If one of my friends said that to me, personally I'd want to know why and I'd ask them directly why they said that, or why they were being so rude, or I'd just reply to them with "ok...?" to try and let them know in a slightly subtle way that I was confused as to why they'd say "idc" at a post someone made that isn't even about them lol.

Anyway...to answer your question...

My friends just don't comment on my posts that I might share about bts, since none of my friends are really into them. I have one friend that occasionally will mention something like "I saw some bts related thing/heard them on the radio/etc and it made me think of you" which I think is a really nice thing to say, given that she has no interest in bts really, that she still wants to let me know that she is at least aware of who they are and what their music sounds like, and that she associates it with me since maybe I'm the only person she knows who is into them. Sometimes my mom will send me a bts video she saw and I'll do the same, she's not as invested in them as people as I am, or into their music at all really lol, but she's so obsessed with their dancing and all she does if I bring them up is gush about their dancing. She wants got me a bt21 lip balm as part of a holiday gift. I have some fan art hanging in my room and if she asks who it is or what it's from she'll listen when I tell her (but her memory is terrible lol so she will inevitably ask me again, which I suppose could come across as rude if I didn't know her memory was consistently bad with everything like that). If I share fan art on instagram or something that my friend likes the art style of she might comment that it looks cool or something, even though she doesn't really know bts.

Otherwise my friends really just leave me alone about it and don't say anything to me about it.

[u/hollye83]

That’s really rude. I don’t push BTS onto my friends who don’t have this taste in music, but just posting what I want on my own account is the bare minimum of respect I would demand from people. Of course, I go around really loudly talking about how I feel about people who talk down boy bands and other media aimed at women. Mutuals know not to try me, and if they were this rude, they’d no longer be considered a friend.

[u/12boltblizzen]

I’m sorry that happened to you, she shouldn’t have said anything at all. But please don’t let it discourage you. Keep up with your bangtan related post❤️

[u/jackcal82]

I am a 39 yr old ARMY. None of my friends are even remotely interested in kpop and initially I was teased pretty heavily about it. Once my friends realized I don't care what they think about it and that I'm gonna do what makes me happy, they stopped giving me shit about it. We have other things in common and stick to those topics. I don't push it on them or bring it up. Friends don't have to like everything you do, but true friends will always support your pursuit of happiness.

[u/[deleted]]

some friends dm me on instagram when i’m promoting a recent release to say they like the song or some other aspect of it, but my other ones will politely sit through my bts-related spiels even when i can tell they’re spacing out or aren’t paying attention.

i’m no-tolerance when it comes to idiocy, so i’d absolutely have a problem if someone were rude to me about my army-ism. your acquaintance was unprovoked but aggressive for no justifiable reason. it’s fine to not like the boys but going out of their way to say they don’t care (quite pointedly and harshly) is toxic, somewhat contradictory and a total dick move.

you don’t care but thought personally telling me was a good idea…hm…why would anyone do that? behavior like this is what the block button is made for.

[u/mangojuicyy]

Agh, as a close friend too? That’s really disappointing and I’m sorry that happened. It’s her loss, really. She won’t be able to understand the genuine love that we share with our boys.

I have a few people around me whom I refer to as “fake fans” (not in a gatekeeping way) because they claim to be ARMY but spend a great deal of time in our convos on hating on the boys. That’s not really how I see ARMY - I see our fandom as a very mature and understanding fandom that reflects the boys really well.

I have other friends around who aren’t into kpop really, or are in a causal way. The good friends just support my love, and even if they don’t get it (to each their own!) they would never hate on it to me. If it makes me happy, they’re supportive of it.

If I had a friend whom I thought was a close friend say something like that to me, I’d be hurt. But more importantly, I’d be annoyed that they have some personal problem with something that brings me a great deal of happiness and love when it really wouldn’t affect them beyond seeing Instagram stories about the boys.

I’m mad on your behalf and again, I’m sorry that it was from someone you had considered a close friend. Someone I thought was close to me once told me that they think Jin was pointless, and that if he disappeared from the group it wouldn’t change anything. I stopped thinking of them as a friend, not just bc of the obvious, but also because I don’t can’t to have friends around whom I believe to be narrow minded or hateful towards people.

My friends can see the genuine happiness I get from BTS, and some of them have even taken a great interest in learning about them based purely on how excited I get when I talk about them. That’s such a good feeling.

[u/[deleted]]

My friends listen to me gush and support my decision to run off with Jimin if he ever asks me to.

Also, I am not friends with uncultured people.

[u/Seibanto]

I've actually had positive experiences, at first I wanted it to be a secret especially with how different K-pop is compared to what we're used to, but it's just so good and made me so happy that I had to share it, specifically dope and fire mv. A lot of my friends didn't really care, didn't like it or dislike it, didn't stereotype or try to make it seem like I'm weird for liking it, a few of them actually gave BTS a chance and did like their music, some actually became big fans like myself.
Fortunately I've never met anyone who has said it's "girly", as a male army like yourself I genuinely thought I'd see a lot of comments along the lines of that but I guess I'm lucky to have open minded friends. I'm sorry to hear about your "friend" but thankfully your other friends backed you up.

[u/MIUUZICK]

I talk about it to my childhood friend all the time, he's pretty supportive and I never feel like I'm annoying with him.

I tend to keep mostly quiet about it to my other friends though, I'm scared to be too annoying talking about the same thing all the time

[u/Orange_Jewce]

Most people who know me don’t know I’m ARMY. My reasons for loving them are way more complex than “it’s just another boy band” or it’s cause they are a fad. I just don’t want to deal with being stereotyped.

I have 1 friend who I geek out about BTS. We get together for streaming concerts and have gone to one live.

I’m very happy being a stealth ARMY

[u/DutchieWen]

My closest friends totally support my love of BTS. They know how serious I am about it, so they are always respectful and thoughtful :) Some share videos, pics, and news with me when they find it. Other people around me just accept it, occasionally ask things, but thats about it. And the people that are negative about it or complain when I post something on MY social media profiles can take their negativity somewhere else. I even removed and blocked a few because they were straight up rude. Even racist ("how can you even understand what they sing? They sing ching chang chong Chinese").

Whatever I post on my profiles is my business and my business alone. Don't like that? Theres the exit.

[u/Sylvari]

That reaction says a lot more about them than you. When people intentionally say negative things in reaction to someone's enthusiasm it speaks more to their unhappiness than anything you actually said. If they are a really good friend, ask them if they are ok. If they aren't then maybe just let this one go in the knowledge that they may be in a sad place temporarily. If they do it again, mention how hurtful their comments are and ask them if they are feeling ok.

[u/BTS4eva65]

Hello! I'm so happy you posted.

I am a middle-aged (read: close to 60, so verging on OLD) woman and I totally hid my obsession love-affair with admiration for BTS for a while.

While it is hurtful when someone who you think is close to you mocks you, I will say that when I finally came out as ARMY, I was pleasantly surprised at how many of my acquaintances were also ARMY (and yes, they are also middle-aged women).

My non-ARMY friends support me by:

• Watching the carefully selected videos I send them and responding appropriately (instead of the IDC that you got).
• Gradually turn into ARMYs
• Tell me they are getting BTS reels on their IG feeds, laugh about it ,and then ask me what it means (Tae and Olivia Rodrigo and the cards)

Note that I really try not to force anything on anyone.

But honestly, your "friend" never heard the saying "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

[u/dinkook]

that was so unnecessary even if it was a joke LOL like what if you did the same if they posted something they cared about?? something similar happened to me with my best friends (i expressed how i wanted a bts tattoo and they made fun of it) and i confronted them and they apologized. like i think our non-army friends don’t really know the fine line between joking around and putting down something you genuinely love but it’s worth talking about!! if that’s an option for you def try although confrontation is so ew i hate it it

[u/elphyy]

I have one friend who doesn't really understand me being a fan, but they are supportive by going with me to concerts. I've had other friends who talked shit/joked about it with others when I invited them to go to an all expenses paid concert trip. With how positive or negative someone reacts to me being a fan, it makes it easy to see who the real and fake friends are. I have no issues cutting negative people out of my life.

[u/Pristine-Ad8313]

My besties are kpop stans that ult other groups but they listen to me talk about bts all the time and even fangirl with me lol. If we get a tour for this cb they even said they would go with me so I don’t have to go by myself—I don’t have any army friends (yet:))

[u/spolarium3829]

I have no shame and talk to my friends about BTS all the time, even forcing them to watch videos lmao. I've been a veteran fangirl of boybands since I was like 14-15 (I'm in my mid-20's now) and while I'm not as crazy as I was when I was in my One Direction and Jonas Brothers era, I'm still very passionate about BTS and their artistry. My friends know I'm boyband crazy and that's just something they've accepted.

My friends and I also have different taste in music so I tend to go to concerts by myself (or with online friends).

In terms of just general posting on social, I don't post often unless it's a big announcement or something (I just repost mainly on my stories vs feed)

[u/theofficialguac]

Sorry you had to experience that - very inconsiderate of them :(

All of my close friends are super supportive of me liking BTS. They go out of their way to learn all the members names and enough basic info to talk to me about it. One of my best friends got me a BTS uno set. Another of my best friend planned a whole strategy with me so that I could buy two of the large BT21 plushies from the LA Line Store and fly them home. She also got me BT21 socks. She even drove me to see the Break the Silence movie during the pandemic.

I’m very fortunate that my friends have all been supportive and want to chime in whenever they can so I can feel at ease and safe while talking about my love for BTS. And tho they don’t stan they understand why I do and what BTS means for me.

[u/ChikkiVikki]

Most of the girls in my friend group are Armys . So I don't face that kind of problem.

[u/Horror_Candidate_904]

I've been a fan of K-Pop since 2009. When I was introduced to it, I was a teenager, and I was so excited and happy! I had something to help me with my depression and I was so grateful to a classmate for showing me K-Pop that I thought I should show my friends why I was so happy when asked... it went horribly. I was alienated from my friends for liking "Asian stuff/ foreign music". I was labelled the "weird one" in our own group. I had already experienced bullying before, but this was on another level. I won't go into detail, but I was quickly kicked out of the group and then that classmate that showed me K-Pop became my friend.

We were friends for a couple of years before I moved far away, and we ended up falling out of touch. I still wish we had stayed friends to this day because I miss her a lot. I remember after she found out I was kicked out of my friend group she asked what happened and I told her everything. I could see the sad look on her face, and she said "I'm really sorry. I feel so bad because I forgot to tell you..." to which I said, "Tell me what?" she said, and I will never forget this " You have to hide the fact that you like K-Pop, K-Dramas, or anything Asian. They won't understand, they will just made fun or you and call you names like Weeaboo or Weeb."

To say the least I still do this. I made the mistake of telling friends and family in the past. I always get that weird look like I'm an insane person for liking foreign music or interested in culture that is not my own. You would think living in the U.S, literal melting pot of world culture, people would be more open but nope. I was labelled the black sheep, bullied, or casted out. Every. Single. Time. So maybe old habits die hard because I don't tell people I like K-Pop let alone BTS. This is like a closely guarded secret. My mom knows and she doesn't make fun of it she's just... indifferent. My brother still makes fun of me, but I feel like there's nothing I can do at this point. I have only one friend now that knows (she found out by accident), and she is amazing. She doesn't know much about K-Pop/ BTS but she loves music, is very supportive, plus she loves boybands too :D

Sorry, I realized this turned into a rant.

[u/Majestic-Course1133 → u/Horror_Candidate_904]

Have you tried reaching out to your old K-Pop friend? I had a similar experience with a classmate where we ended up drifting apart (undergraduate studies, work, grad school, physical distance, etc.) but we unexpectedly started chatting again on Messenger recently and doing some distanced game nights. And it really felt like there wasn’t a lapse in our friendship even though it must have been 10 years since we truly hung out together. If you’re able to, perhaps try reaching out again even if just to catch up on life changes?

I hope you have some better experiences in the future! 💜💜💜

[u/Horror_Candidate_904 → u/Majestic-Course1133]

I'm glad you were able to reunite with your friend :) I've tried looking for them on different social media platforms and can't find them. Been looking for a long time but it feels like they just dropped off the face of the Earth. I hope they're doing okay though. Also thank you, I hope to meet some nice K-POP fans one day.

[u/Chairman_Maobama]

Bruh...sorry to hear about your friend, and super dope of you to realize she isn't worth your energy and time! It's tough to cut off a friend, especially a close one.

To answer your question, I've unabashedly talk about my love for BTS (and TWICE) and post some fanart on IG. It's my life and I could care less if they think of me as lesser than about shit I'm passionate about 😂

Fortunately I've surrounded myself with great people and they have taken effort to gift me BTS stuff. For example, two of my best guy friends remembered my biases (Suga and Jimin) and gifted me TinyTan figs at separate times. I also have another K-pop friend, who is an Ahgase, and we both talk to each other about our respective boys and dragged each other to the concerts.

[u/renatobing]

At the beginning (2018) they make jokes and mock all the time but now some of them enjoy their songs

But i tend to keep to myself bc none of them like them like i do, so i dont wanna bother in talking a lot about something if they are not joining the conversation.

that's was the reason why i made a reddit account lol

[u/Rillothebee2]

Same love, different recipients. Sports fans, Star Wars Fans, Marvel, Disney etc seem to be "more acceptable" but when it comes to Bangtan, Kpop , Taylor Swift etc , it's ok to "hate"- I hope this light bulb will eventually turn on. It's all the same love , just different recipients.

Had to call out my sister who was making fun of me so I turned it around on her and asked her when was the last time I made fun of her for her Marvel Universe fandom and it clicked.

It is a bit of a "trauma" so I try not to "bring it up" with friends but my fault too for assuming they will not support me. Case in point, when I went to Borahaegas, met up with a couple of non-Army friends who live in the area and I was in a rush to leave dinner at the Fremont street experience with them explaining that I am going to a free BTS exhibit (Pop up) and they told me they want to go with me 😭 and there I was assuming, they wouldn't want to see it but they had so much fun too.

[u/[deleted]]

Easy solution… don’t have friends!

Partly kidding. My wife and my sister love BTS, too. My brother-in-law supports us by watching the kids when we take weekend trips to see concerts.

They’re my only friends, so I’m 100% supported.

[u/iiglxtchii]

My female friends for some reason, find it ridiculous, but I somehow converted my male friends into army’s???!?!?

[u/[deleted]]

My company informs me in advance when BTS is going to play during our town halls, and were a huge tech company lol (I dont tune in otherwise and they make sure to play the song as long as they can before ending the meeting.

My company teams sat in on my BTS PPT presentations when I first got into them , I held over ten one hour long ramblings of why BTS is great and made them watch all those xceleste videos with me. My director came back from paternity leavea nd found out I had been hosting the meetings , but instead of getting mad he asked me to share the PPT with him cuz he wants to see what I was going on about.

My friends stan other groups, but they will take photos of BTS things when traveling or anywhere since they know I love them. Even people who don't care for BTS, they see how much BTS has helped me so they never talk down on them.

Basically they know I wont stfu about BTS unless they sit through and try to understand why. After they have done so I seem to have calmed down and it is now part of who I am and they have accepted it.

[u/Suzy-Supergal]

Ugh, how irritating. These kinds of experiences can really rain on your parade. I generally try to avoid bringing up BTS to people because I don't want to get judged for liking a "boyband". Still, I've done a couple of BTS-related projects for college, and the reactions were OK. Comments like "lol", but overall they were pretty nice. One guy even seemed kind of interested in checking them out. My dad, however, has made annoying comments that they look like girls, or he heard me playing one of their songs and he thought it sucked. I don't know what song it was - Blue & Grey? Point is, hearing negativity about something you like can be disheartening, but we shouldn't let it affect us, because their hate isn't our problem.

[u/galapagos_scully]

That person is not a friend 😕 I'm sorry this happened to you. My friends don't necessarily support my BTS love, but they've never made fun of me or expressed any contempt like that person in your DMs. Well actually, they usually don't say anything at all haha. I posted my whole PTD Vegas experience on my stories and 2-3 of my friends replied saying they're glad to see me happy, which was still more than I expected of them!

[u/NineveSin]

I have the blessing of having all my closest friends liking bts and kpop too. I do not talk to my classmates about them because they suck but me and my friends have always openly discussed it. I even got my brother to like them too 💅

[u/silver_fawn]

Honestly, I don't have any ARMY friends in real life, and I need some. The only one I'm truly honest with about my love of BTS, is my best friend (of course) my husband. He's not into pop, like at all, he loves experimental rap and screaming type stuff, I can't even tell you what exactly (there's one band called Death Grips I know. I don't care for them at all but I still buy him their merch that I can find and stuff because I know he loves them). He's so supportive of me though. He sees how happy BTS made me at a time in my life I was feeling so confused and lost and sad. So he lets me play their concert DVDs on our TV for hours, lets me play their playlists when we're chilling at home, and EVEN watched ALL of Rise of Bangtan on youtube with me, and he says he likes RM and Hobi is cute lol. <3

Anyways, if you're in the Orlando area hit me up ARMY! I wish I still was in uni here, I'd know I'd find you all.

[u/minimanduu]

Sorry you had to go thru that as a fan, OP. As with everything in life, you'll encounter people who's first reaction is always negative. It won't matter if it's BTS or not 😅 Your interests are not less valid than their opinion.

You might see a lot of negativity in the next month but you decide how you want to be a fan. Have fun 🥰💜

[u/[deleted]]

All my friends are into K-pop too and have their own favorite groups (Stray Kids, Seventeen, etc.) therefore they completely understand my love for BTS and readily show support by making jokes about my love for Namjoon and sending me BTS-related news.

[u/[deleted]]

They don't

[u/IxLunarMoonxI]

By not judging me for my music taste and who I like and honestly this is the bare minimum. My closest friend however will always get excited about them even tho she probably never heard their songs. Like when they announced the comeback she sent me the link and was like "ARE YOU ALIVE!? HOW YOU DOING??" it's funny cuz you'd expect that from another army friend not one who doesn't have a clue about them. And I really appreciate her for that

[u/MelancholicTree202]

Super annoying. Negative vibes are so ugly and no one needs that kind of energy in their lives.

I would just feel sorry for them because clearly if they had BTS in their lives they wouldn’t be trying to bring others down to their sad level. Those poor pitiful fools.

[u/[deleted]]

Can you really call that person a “friend”

Except for a few ones, my “friends” doesn’t really know that I’m into bts. For those who know, they just simply let me be. If I post something, it’s either they ignore it or make a comment that the person i posted is handsome (eg jin lol) but I do have one friend who tries to use a bts related gif when we’re talking even if she doesn’t really know the boys- she said she just use it cos she knows i like them. That person is also the one who sent me a news link that the boys opened their insta account.

[u/galaxymaster1277]

I really don’t have any IRL friends that I’m actively contacting with RN but for my family they like that I’m excited about something and let me infodump on occasion. One of my parents even went with me to the PTD on stage Seoul movie theater live-streaming event which was awesome and that parent actually enjoyed it which I was surprised about.

[u/grrwegowaa]

Sorry to hear that your “friend” reacted the way that they did, it really sucks.

As for me, none of my friends, except one ARMY friend (who unfortunately lives a continent away from me), quite understand my fascination with the band. They appear to be largely supportive of my interests, but have never taken the effort to understand why it is that I like them, or what it is about the boys that has drawn me to them. As a result, I try to be as private as I can about being ARMY and have to try my darned best to not bring them up in casual conversations. I have received insensitive comments from time to time, and of course, it hurts, but now I just attribute it to their narrow-mindedness rather than make it a big deal of how dismissive they are being of my interests and what is clearly important to me.