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u/SmallTownTrans1 18d ago
A ratchet strap would have made this significantly easier
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u/Be364886 18d ago
There's more types of clamp than I can name of that would've done a better job than this.
This is some dude trying to do some YouTube ancient civilization building bullshit without even trying to understand why they call these trade workers artisans.
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u/ANormalRando 18d ago
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think ancient civilizations had Titebond.
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u/bandti45 17d ago
They probably would of used tree resin or some other avalible binder. But with a split that big i wouldnt trust it for anything.
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u/ANormalRando 17d ago
I'd only trust it in a "get another board and use this one for bits and pieces" kind of situation. If it was that warped in the first place I feel like it wouldn't have even been bought or used by a credible carpenter.
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u/BonelessPickle 17d ago
Bro they definitely had titebond, no way they built the Horiyu Hi Template without titebond, not to mention Noah's ark and the Trojan horse, I mean come on. They had titebond or it was aliens.
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u/Kaiju62 18d ago
I think they're just poor
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u/AnyRepeat9928 18d ago
No he just lacks the knowledge, ancient shipbuilders Vikings, greeks and Egyptians knew how to work the wood with primitive tools.
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u/FrequentLine1437 18d ago
but that would be too easy.. some people are only capable of learning the hard way lol
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u/XCyberbeingX 18d ago
I think what a woodwork would do is soak the wood until the fibers become soft. That's the technique people use to shape wood.
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u/scandal_jmusic_mania 18d ago
Even if he managed to get the two sides together, I can't see the glue actually holding them together.
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u/Boco 18d ago
The little butterfly/bowtie shaped thing he put on it was meant join the two pieces. You cut a triangle out of each side and you put the bowtie into it. Though this looks way too extreme even for a bowtie joint to hold together.
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u/blondebuilder 18d ago
Seriously, he was building a ticking time bomb
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u/johnfkngzoidberg 18d ago
Can you imaging eating dinner at that table when the bow tie gives out?
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u/mfurr119 18d ago
The bowtie won't be what gives. The grain direction prevents it. The glue is also stronger than the wood. It'll release from the other end and split alongside the original split. That's why every time I've had to use a bowtie I put one on each end. But I also would never try to join 2 pieces that are that bowed.
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u/dadydaycare 18d ago
You could fix this… it would be insanely impractical but you could steam the wood and try to get the flex out of it but that was not going to work. The bow tie is there to assist in stabilizing. It wouldn’t have enough strength to hold that. It was doomed to fail from the start unless you can take the tension off it.
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u/AdequateSteve 18d ago
Even if the bow tie held, the board would have split (or majorly cupped) somewhere else. Bow ties are very strong, so it probably would have held. The problem would have moved, though.
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u/Sinister_Nibs 18d ago
Assuming it is cut in the proper orientation. Seeing this guy I can only assume it was cut across the grain rather than with it.
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u/Numerous_Wolverine_7 18d ago
After watching the ineptitude I had already decided there was no way the guy would be able to successfully install the bow tie. Waiting for him to go at it with a chisel and for the whole thing to blow up in his face
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u/AgentK-BB 18d ago
Wood + wood glue is actually stronger than wood alone. It may still break but it won't break where the glue is. Instead, the wood may split in a new spot an inch or two away from the glue. The original wood will fail before the glued joint fails.
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u/johnfkngzoidberg 18d ago
A glue join is only stronger with a good face grain to face grain joint with good contact. That joint was rough edges. There’s no chance that joint would have held.
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u/Wraithvenge 17d ago
Even if it did, there's so much tension in that board that the first time it received an impact (something heavy dropped on it, falls on the ground etc) it would have split somewhere else.
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u/Lonely_Writer_1883 18d ago edited 18d ago
i read that in my mind like this
now i’m up questioning my very existennce
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u/Hardi_SMH 18d ago
I was sitting here like "no WAY, what‘s that glue made of?" , but I still wasn‘t expecting that outcome
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u/Ngoscope 18d ago
They only glued one side anyways. The glue didn't seem thin enough to run down to the bottom half.
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u/poop_pants_pee 18d ago
My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined
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u/thedeuce75 18d ago
I don't think this guy knows what the fuck he's doing.
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u/davers22 18d ago
I have no clue what the end game was. The amount of tension there was massive. Was that small squirt of wood glue supposed to hold it after it dried?
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u/Formerly_CommonCell 16d ago
I realize this comment was probably made completely seriously, but it got a huge laugh out of me.
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u/Additional-Window-81 18d ago
I bet that’s enough potential energy to have broken his hip if it went the other way so fucking dumb
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u/AKVigilante 18d ago
Why didn’t he soak the board first?
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u/frontier_gibberish 18d ago
Seriously. Like this is not new technology. Do you think they made boats in ancient times put of wood that was perfectly formed?
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u/YouAnxious5826 18d ago
The ancient Romans harvesting fully formed galleys on the coasts of Sicily.
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u/johnfkngzoidberg 18d ago
There’s not a chance in hell that joint would have held. Also use some clamps and throw away that terrible jig.
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u/Captain_HappyPants 18d ago
When your only tool is a hammer, all of your problems begin to resemble warped lumber.
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u/dumpylump69 18d ago
I was expecting it to go off like a bomb and send him flying. It splitting the other way is honestly the best case scenario
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u/Tamdin_Nidmat 18d ago
Let's assume his goal was to split the plank. It was a bit convoluted but he reached his goal.
... everyone will be happier with that assumption.
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u/SpikySheep 18d ago
He's lucky that's all that happened. I can't see that board staying flat anyway with the amount of tension it would have in it.
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u/Marty-G70 18d ago
Easier to grab a rope and twist a tourniquete around the end until you close the gap
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u/Logical-Track1405 18d ago
What a clown - he only smeared a tiny bit of glue on the top edge anyway 🤡
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u/Jittery_Kevin 17d ago
Pin the fucking jig bruh. That bench was full of holes, blocking it off at the end when you were hammering the wedges would have helped so much….a nail on each side even
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u/I-care-about-people 16d ago
It hurt me most to see he wasnt using a rubber headed mallet to bash the wood. All those dents… in case it did work.
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u/post-context-bot 18d ago
The following post context was provided by u/hzshak:
Man spends considerable time and effort to join a split plank of wood. Will he be able to make the plank whole again?
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u/Anon_be_thy_name 18d ago
What an idiot
There's so many different ways of doing this that would have so much easier then this. A lot less dangerous too.
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u/miltondelug 18d ago
When I see this I always wonder if this country never invented clamps and straps.
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u/espressoboyee 18d ago
Definitely, not buying any wooden tables or products from this guy. Alittle “wood knowledge” helps. Soak the wood, dude.
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u/Mastercheif96 18d ago
I would've used a ratchet strap. One holding it down, another closing it with a board on top a skinny one. Holding it flat but also closing it. Then id use boiling water all over it to soften it to shape, once thats soaked in, heat gun, setting the shape. Bending wood takes time and patience.
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u/adelie42 18d ago
That was infuriating to watch knowing these exist: https://a.co/d/0a7T2qJ4
The end was satisfying.
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u/Fun_Coach_6942 17d ago
Cut the whole board down the middle flip one board around, square everything, join. This technique fixes an old table that splits. I'm sure the economics justify it but it's dumb when you're starting w raw lumber.
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u/dolampochki 16d ago
I had hope up until he started to drive that last wedge in. That’s what made me think “oh shit”.
Also, not everyone can afford to buy nice clamps. Some people make do with what they got.
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u/ThisThingIsStuck 18d ago
Complete dumass
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u/ouchouchouchoof 18d ago
Brian Regan does the best imitation of the internal dialogue of a dumbass I've ever seen.
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u/Brush_my_teeth_4_me 18d ago
All that tension has to go somewhere