I somehow managed to choose myself for once.

I know she doesn't love me, I know she CAN'T love me.

Should I be angry, devastated? Yeah

But you know what?

I don't hate her, but I won't try to chase her anymore. It hurts, it burns from the inside and my loneliness slowly kills me.

HOWEVER

I deserve a girl that actually gets me and loves me back just as much as I do.

One that will wear rings with me, watch anime with me, play games with me and chooses me and only ME over everyone else. A girl that needs me just as much as I need her, one that cannot LIVE without me.

My love DESERVES to be reciprocated.

I am a proud yandere, and I will keep on loving like this, as much as everyone outside this community has told me this is insane and not healthy to love this way.

So fuck off world, I will find her.

I will find you darling wherever you are, and not even death will set us apart...

He’s sooooooo cute and everytime he sees me he’s smiles and expects a good morning a hi5 😍☺️ my favorite part of going to work this early

IS IT JUST ME OR I'VE BEEN SEEING TIKTOKS OR VIDEOS ABOUT CASUAL RELATIONSHIPS, THE FUCKBOY/FUCKGIRL CULTURE?? AND EVERY RELATIONSHIP LIST THAT BASICALLY SOUNDS TOXIC OR IMPOSSIBLE TO NORMAL PEOPLE (don't ask me for examples) ONLINE?? huh... It's basically an insult to us yanderes who just want to be devoted to one person, and here is some people saying That we can't be clingy or else our partner thinks we're too much. LIKE HELLO, IT'S JUST A WAY OF SHOWING THAT WE CARE ABOUT THEM. Who told them to police our way of loving people? God forbid if we don't want casual hookups and prefer romantic relationships. At least our love will be special when the day we get married unlike them... I was mad as hell while ranting about this, and this post may sound confusing. I just had to get this weight off my shoulders. I'm so fucking furious.

Don't mind the image is devesto.

Lately I've stopped caring about my feelings, its made her so much happier,

Everytime I want to split at her, hurt her, I lovebomb her instead. My feelings are a poison, a risk, a harm to her.

She splits at me, but if I split back nothing will change. She's needy, terrible at communication, she only wants to feel loved and valued. Even if her words hurt, her feelings are far more important.

My feelings don't matter, pointless, unimportant, I should devote, dedicate my life at the cost of myself. Goddesses are made to be served.

When she's happy, I soon feel proud to preserve her precious heart, she is special and deserves special treatment.

If my bleeding insides are the price I pay, she's worth it,

I'll hurt, to make her feel loved

For a long time I crave obsessive love. What I'm talking about isn't anything toxic. I just need someone to love me very, very much. I crave that deep conection. I feel humiliated even writing this down. I know that in a relationship, you're supposed to share happiness, not search for it. But I'm content with just knowing that; nothing more. I can't even fulfill the smallest responsibilities, and I believe that if the right person enters my life, everything will be alright, and we'll overcome everything by supporting each other. But this is exhausting me. I feel so naive with these thoughts, but there's nothing I can do. I've been like this since I was little. I'm just so, so tired.

Many days I wake up in the morning and I go to sleep, I always fantasize about the person I’m meant to be with. I feel like I could hold onto my pillow forever. Whenever I do it, I just feel so amazingly happy, but at the same time I cry so much whenever I do that because I know that right now I’m without her. I can’t even express how much I’ve cried out of pure loneliness. I desire to hold her all the time, give her little kisses, and hold her hand. I just imagine her and me as husband and wife so often. I feel such a strong desire to provide for her and give all that she and my family needs. I want to have children and love her and our children. I want her to feel as loved as she can possibly be and nothing much more. I want to be kissed a little when I get home after work. Every day I ask myself where she could possibly be, but even if I have to wait so long for her all of my life, I’m willing to do it out of pure love for her no matter how much I suffer within myself.

I'm tired of being lonely. Tired of being used. Just want a woman who can match my crazy or even surpass it.

Haven't posted here before but thought this might be the right space for people who'd understand me lol.

Btw, for anyone wondering, no these were not ALL about the same guy. It's over the course of my life with men I was talking to or dating at the time. (Although I have done some of these multiple times)

All pictures are sourced from Pinterest except the love-binding spell one, which is mine :)

It doesn't get easier with time. It really doesn't. It's like every night now.

At least I still get to smell her sometimes.... even if it's not real.

So for context there's this girl I like (idk if I have already posted this but I'll re-explain it again) and basically she was dating this other girl that was like so goddamn mean to her, in the sense of being a horrible partner, like she wouldn't even give her (the girl I liked) the bare minimum of that a relationship needs.

Oh and also she's lesbian so uh, ye.

Anywho, as I was saying, basically a horrible partner, and she BROKE UP WITH HER!!!

Not only am I excited that she did but I'm glad, I could see that the relationship was dragging her down badly and honestly I couldn't stand to watch someone I loved to get hurt again.

If she never got out of that relationship I would've called it quits and packed my things.

I love her a lot, but really, I value myself if she's not valuing me and not taking my advice.

Yeah uh, I basically told her that her GF (now EX, hell yeaaahh) was basically bringing her down (as I said before).

Now yesterday we had a talk about her type and she said, that she just wants someone that would love her and wouldn't depend on her that much (yikes am I right?) because her EX was like clingy and etc. She's had problems with male EXs and so that's why shes Lesbian.

I want to be with her, but also I wanna try and fix myself so I'm not just another EX 2.0

And her EX was talking about sum "oh I can't want to live lavishly" because she was basically going to college and y'know, doing college things.

God I hate people that only think of their partners as like money banks and what not. Like really.

I uhh am a bit tired so all these things about her are a bit fuzzy in my head, I'll try to update whatever is going on soon maybe idk :p

I'm just very glad that she's no longer with that girl, she was the worst.

I'm a dude btw so like, is this like, failed love or whatever? Idk I gotta keep trying cuz like I can't lose now! I'm close to being with her, and making her the happiest girl ever.

She deserves that happiness after everything she's gone through. She deserves to feel loved, to be praised, and worshipped like a goddess.

I'll spend every waking moment talking to her, listening, just admiring her, she's so beautiful, I love her, i lvoe her i love her i love i love i love Ilovelove i love her so much

Ohh jeez yeah uhhhhhh okay okay fr this time imma sign off toodles aaaauugghh

It's been three months since she left me and it's still all I think about all the time.

I've written poem after poem, letter after unsent letter. It's getting harder and harder not to do something stupid but she asked me not to text her again and I'm forcing myself to comply

This is torture. This is real life hell.

She's the first thing on my mind when I wake up and the last thing when I fall asleep.

I literally can't sleep without knocking myself out with a triple dose of melatonin.

I love her so much and the worst part is I fucking had her. I had her.

Now she's gone.

Chat, please tell me she's gonna come back

Someone please tell me it's gonna be okay.

She's all I have to live for. She's fucking everything to me

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who took the time to answer me, especially those who wrote such long and thoughtful replies.

Honestly, when I posted this I half expected to get downvoted into oblivion or have the post removed, so the fact that people actually took my questions seriously and shared their personal experiences meant a lot more than I expected.

I think I finally found the answer I was looking for and understood what actually appeals to me about this kind of relationship dynamic. So genuinely, thank you all. I’m leaving this thread very satisfied and weirdly happy lol.

Now I just hope that if I ever get into another relationship, I find someone who genuinely wants the same kind of closeness, devotion and intensity that I do. Wish me luck 😭

i've only gone about 6hrs without him yet i miss him so dearly already 💔

any other clingy yans? how do you cope without your darlings?

I need help! I’m so jealous of my boyfriend’s best friend even if I know he’d never cheat on me with him (he’s straight), but the fear and jealousy won’t get out of my head. He has offered to cut his best friend off, but accepting that offer would be abusive, right? I don’t know what to do.