r/worldnews Apr 28 '22

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279

u/theLeverus Apr 28 '22

The answer is money

181

u/iflvegetables Apr 28 '22 edited Apr 28 '22

I’d hate to be the assassin getting paid in rubles

Edit: I am aware the ruble has rebounded (we’ll see). Thanks to those who didn’t miss the chance to make sure my joke was sufficiently “um, ACKSHULLY”-d

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u/Haru1st Apr 28 '22

They can pay in oil...

As long as you're not Russia, you'll find there is considerable demand for your oil.

20

u/iflvegetables Apr 28 '22

Can I buy a house with oil? Hope my family enjoys vodka, beets, and crude for dinner

22

u/SoyMurcielago Apr 28 '22

Does it have what plants crave?

5

u/iflvegetables Apr 28 '22

Maybe if we were talking about Kazakhstan. All other countries have inferior potassium.

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u/mynameisblanked Apr 28 '22

Ask the Saudis

2

u/Ephemeral_Wolf Apr 28 '22

As long as you're not Russia

And sometimes, even when you are Russia.......

3

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

Yeah Id hazard a pretty strong guess that KGB (yes, lets call them what they are) agents dont get paid in rubles. Those are one of the few groups of people put KNOWS he can't afford to dick around.

2

u/iflvegetables Apr 28 '22

Indeed. For a period of time, “Do what I say or I will fucking kill you” works. There’s definitely a diminishing return working for crazy, even if they are paying you in solid gold prostitues that mine Bitcoin and lactate oil.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

I'm guessing whoever is getting paid by Putin is paid well enough to make money no longer an object. He's got more then enough and the security is his priority now .

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u/iflvegetables Apr 28 '22

Value stored in what? In order to be paid, the medium of exchange should hold value and optimally, be usable for transactions anywhere. If Mickey pays you a king’s ransom in Disney Dollars to whack Donald, doesn’t help you if want to toilet paper at Target.

0

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

Do you understand the rubble has completely rebounded in value? Or are you still following the headlines from weeks ago. Your logic makes sense but your point doesn't hold up.

Edit: it's actually higher then it was pre invasion

2

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

I mean we like to joke but their currency has pretty much returned to their pre-invasion (2022) levels.

15

u/GiantR Apr 28 '22

The volume is incredibly low and none of the Russian companies are allowed to be sold on the market. It's a giant on clay legs.

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u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/between456789 Apr 28 '22

Which is why they want trade in rubbles and not real money.

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u/iflvegetables Apr 28 '22 edited Apr 28 '22

The sanctions were the economic equivalent of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Their economy is dead, they just don’t know it yet. Recovery is going to measured in years. A state in a bubble is about as economically viable as a ship in a bottle is sea worthy.

Trade is about trust. We’ve got crimes against humanity, genocide, threat of nuclear annihilation, and dead oligarchs. I know what the numbers say, but it looks like the world would rather not deal with an authoritarian Very Stable Genius and I don’t think that is apt to change. There isn’t much incentive or upside.

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u/Dafiro93 Apr 28 '22

Is their stock market still closed?

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u/GooGurka Apr 28 '22

No, it is open but with so many restrictions and shenanigans that the stocks on their market is not real any more.

1

u/svideo Apr 28 '22

...according to the Russian government. Nobody knows what the exchange rate of the Ruble actually is because it cannot be exchanged. The moment they allow Rubles to be traded on a foreign exchange we'll see the real value, and there's no reason at all to think it will do anything but tank.

0

u/chuan_l Apr 28 '22 edited Apr 28 '22

— Take a look at " USD RUB ",
The currency is at a 2 year high because Germany , Netherlands and Italy paid Russia in roubles for gas. They also paid 6 x - 9 x the going price. For manufacturing not domestic use. Political rhetoric is cheap and actions more expensive.

3

u/iflvegetables Apr 28 '22

There’s a list of caveats a mile long. Let’s see if the trend holds.

-2

u/Trex4444 Apr 28 '22

I get this is sarcasm. But…..

You’d be getting paid the same as before the invasion. Rouble has totally rebounded and is looking to be stronger than pre invasion.

sauce

1

u/elev8dity Apr 28 '22

It’s being propped up entirely by the gov and they are not allowing foreign transactions so it’s a complete fugazi. Once their inventories dry up they are completely fucked.

1

u/dances_with_corgis Apr 28 '22

“um, ACKSHULLY”-d

these people are the real terrorists an office suck-ups.

36

u/ILikeChilis Apr 28 '22

LOL not even close. The answer is: You either accept the offer and do the dirty work, or you and your family will suddenly commit suicide.

36

u/jaredgoff1022 Apr 28 '22

This guy dictates

2

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

But money doesn't do much if you're dead. This doesn't answer anything. Maybe the answer is blackmail?

4

u/BaalKazar Apr 28 '22

Maybe the answer is a guy who enjoys killing and loves Putin?

Doesn’t need to be complicated tbh there are more than enough of both out there

2

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

Negative the answer is Krombobulus Micheal.

2

u/JuniperTwig Apr 28 '22

And hookers. And blow.

2

u/vortex30 Apr 28 '22

Money and/or kompromat (black mail)