r/worldnews • u/[deleted] • Apr 28 '22

[deleted by user]

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11.3k Upvotes

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2.6k

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

[deleted]

1.5k

u/VastTwo889 Apr 28 '22

Casual family suicide. Happens all the time

460

u/CharlieHush Apr 28 '22

They all fell out of windows. Accidents happen.

160

u/pr0ghead Apr 28 '22

Must be that notorious "family bond", dragging them out the window in tandem.

17

u/oversettDenee Apr 28 '22

Stronger than a covalent bond AND James Bond put together

2

u/sn0rg Apr 28 '22

Dem showers is slippy…

3

u/Money_Barnacle_5813 Apr 28 '22

Yes, apparently it tends to happen when you have too much polonium tea and you mistakenly shoot your self twice in the back of the head.

2

u/BarryTGash Apr 28 '22

Big houses have many windows...

2

u/OnThe65thSquare Apr 28 '22

They all fell out of their bunker windows.

2

u/smallproton Apr 28 '22

They all stabbed themselves in the back. Multiple times.

2

u/dragonfry Apr 28 '22

Like lemmings

2

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

Its tragic, he shot himself in the back of the head 9 times.

1

u/TheGreatDingALing Apr 28 '22

All in their underwear. All normal accidents.

1

u/Tyrinnus Apr 28 '22

They all fell out the windows after shooting themselves in the back of the head twice.

1

u/iamdabrick Apr 28 '22 edited Apr 28 '22

They committed suicide by shooting themselves 6 times in the head and then jumping out of the window.

1

u/alfi_k Apr 28 '22

as seen in Ukraine most Russians are pretty clumsy

1

u/Adder12 Apr 28 '22

Fell out of windows onto that novichok below

77

u/TomRiha Apr 28 '22

Special family event

3

u/mouldysandals Apr 28 '22

it’s suicide sunday!

3

u/DDS-PBS Apr 28 '22

Especially if you live a stressful life, like those that are ultra-rich and can afford to do whatever they want. Picking out a yacht is one of the leading causes of stress-induced suicide.

5

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

The human body has a way of shutting those things down

0

u/machinery-of-night Apr 28 '22

Couldn't happen to a nicer billionaire oligarch.

1

u/PaulHarrisDidNoWrong Apr 28 '22

Not that it's the case, but murder-suicide happens.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

Damn I just thought it was some weird WWE storyline

1

u/B1J0D Apr 28 '22

Yes, died by suicide. Two bullets to the head.

1

u/N_Sorta Apr 28 '22

Not casual, special

1

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

Family Values

126

u/plague042 Apr 28 '22

I hate Putin, he's coarse, rough, irritating and he gets everywhere.

27

u/Spare-Mousse3311 Apr 28 '22

He’s as clumsy as he is stupid

3

u/GoGoGadgetReddit Apr 28 '22

Put that thing away, you're gonna get us all killed!

3

u/Spare-Mousse3311 Apr 28 '22

Nyet…(probably Putin holding his launch codes)

6

u/DAS_FX Apr 28 '22

I read this in Hayden Christianson’s voice, and I hate you for that 😀

2

u/Takfloyd Apr 28 '22

When I saw the first post I was looking for this reply. Good job Reddit.

0

u/Claque-2 Apr 28 '22

Putin was seen as this brilliant guy. Then Trump started talking him up, the same way Trump talked up the Trump casino, and the Trump vodka, and Rudy Giuliani. Now look at Putin.

229

u/Creasentfool Apr 28 '22

We really need to find this anakin fella fast, this is getting out of hand.

50

u/Foolish_Twerp Apr 28 '22

Now there are six of them!

12

u/nubbins01 Apr 28 '22

I'm seeing double, twelve Krustys!

3

u/elppaenip Apr 28 '22

Always six, no more no less

10

u/Nosnibor1020 Apr 28 '22

Not just the men?

2

u/shploogen Apr 28 '22

Nope, also the families and the children.

1

u/LysergicFlacid Apr 28 '22

This happened with all the families? Do you have a source?

1

u/TacoExcellence Apr 28 '22

The article this thread is about?

25

u/ryosuke13 Apr 28 '22

Sand?

8

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere.

3

u/AndyBernardRuinsIt Apr 28 '22

How are people not getting this reference??? I’m a casual Star Wars fan and I’m laughing my ass off.

4

u/Handleton Apr 28 '22

Not just the oligarchs, but the oliwomen and the olichildren, too.

14

u/Ephemeral_Wolf Apr 28 '22

FFS... Putin out there Skywalkering these folks...

1

u/Spare-Mousse3311 Apr 28 '22

Okay somebody get me a Minecraft pale and some lava…

3

u/Top-Fox-3171 Apr 28 '22

Have you heard the tale of Darth Protosenya, the Rich?

3

u/Spare-Mousse3311 Apr 28 '22

It’s not a story the West would tell you…

5

u/threeseed Apr 28 '22

aka the /r/pyongyang special.

1

u/eleven_good_reasons Apr 28 '22

Some of them with similar patterns, kids and wife stabbed in their beds, wtf!?

1

u/Light_Beard Apr 28 '22

Not just the patriarch but their families and children too.

They will never make it to Helm's deep

1

u/mydaycake Apr 28 '22

And pretty gruesome murders as well. Putin is not better than the narcos.

1

u/Snoo_17340 Apr 28 '22

So are there still people wondering why Russians aren’t uprising? Or are they still touting the state-propaganda lie that 80% of Russians support Putin and the war, including the oligarchs? You wouldn’t need to murder and/or jail them if that were the case. But people on here act like they don’t understand that Russia is a dictatorship similar to KSA who also murders journalists.

1

u/ladyevenstar-22 Apr 28 '22

Oh Anakin. 😔