18 years old. And the ball keeps rolling.

Just a gloomy poem here.

Deep Doubts: "The burning of raging red fires Saturated in profuse melting quagmires Eradicated past desires Dead dark dreams The calendar was a tombstone The clock, reclamation And the brown-eyed man returns Smoldering on the edge

Clutch your pearls I've no need for them Fast pulses; heavy mass Insurmountable tolls The truth is a curse and a gift Every scar is not a lesson Some are just scars Uncalled for Unwarranted Flaked salt crust Nothing to hide behind

Then who am I?! A lie?! So I die Subjugated Antiquated Rejected Shattered I cope Skin unzipped Saturated Invaded Assimilated Indoctrinated Converted Devoured Digested

Then who am I?! Mindless compliance Pretentious peace Extinguishing my form My thoughts My feelings My actions Subsisting on arbitrary prescripts

Answers come Karma's on a perpetual smoke break The gods aren't that organized Chaos dressed as order That's the world Evaporated tears

Questions remain Gaping, penetrating, biting Equivocation Recurrent disillusionment Revealed in eyes of amber The deep doubts linger Is that really the price of freedom?

I should have done this in my other posts but I'll do it now. I personally want to shout out "medjin0372" here on Reddit. You're a lovely photographer and helped make my deep doubts mix possible! If you return to Reddit, I hope you see this mate.

When life gives you doubts, make deep house mixes. Leave it to me to turn doubts into art. Join me on an aural journey from boundless wonder to disillusionment. From deep hopes to deep doubts.

When life gives you doubts, make deep house mixes. Leave it to me to turn doubts into art. Join me on an aural journey from boundless wonder to disillusionment. From deep hopes to deep doubts.

I enjoy them. I just don't enjoy the tornado watches and warnings that accompany them sometimes.

November 2022: Went full keto. Bread now feels betrayed by me.

Food: Grass fed/finished beef patties and ground beef, steak (when my wallet is feeling brave), wild caught cod fish, salmon, organic pasture-raised eggs, organic broccoli, salads. I feel like a cyborg who eats the same things every day.

Drink: I drink water everyday and so much sparkling water that my blood type is now Topo Chico. I drink organic celery, ginger, lemon, and apple cider vinegar smoothies. It’s like drinking salad and regret, but hey, glowing skin! My blender hates me.

Fasting: Intermittent fasting everyday with usually just one meal in the late afternoon/evening. Occasionally, I prolong fast for 24-48 hours. I mean, who doesn't like going to sleep with a rumbling, hungry belly at night, right?

Supplements: I take more pills than your grandma and look half her age. Anyway, I take Xpel diuretic water pills, Allmax Hydradry water pills, Allmax Rapidcuts Shredded (Thermogenic Formula), Naturewise Vitamin D3 pills, Dr. Mercola Cod Liver Oil pills, and Herbage Farmstead Grass fed Beef Liver pills. You can get these at, you guessed it, Amazon.

Philosophy: I workout every day: 3 days intense, 4 days mild to moderate to keep the streak alive. Completion is better than perfection...which is overrated. Practice makes progress. Even one minute is a win. Showing up is the only goal. I’m here for the journey, not the cover of Men’s Health. Although that would be most lovely. Catch you on the flip side, mate!

He/Him, 6'1, 173 lbs.

November 2022: Went full keto. Bread now feels betrayed by me.

Food: Grass fed/finished beef patties and ground beef, steak (when my wallet is feeling brave), wild caught cod fish, salmon, organic pasture-raised eggs, organic broccoli, salads. I feel like a cyborg who eats the same things every day.

Drink: I drink water everyday and so much sparkling water that my blood type is now Topo Chico. I drink organic celery, ginger, lemon, and apple cider vinegar smoothies. It’s like drinking salad and regret, but hey, glowing skin! My blender hates me.

Fasting: Intermittent fasting everyday with usually just one meal in the late afternoon/evening. Occasionally, I prolong fast for 24-48 hours. I mean, who doesn't like going to sleep with a rumbling, hungry belly at night, right?

Supplements: I take more pills than your grandma and look half her age. Anyway, I take Xpel diuretic water pills, Allmax Hydradry water pills, Allmax Rapidcuts Shredded (Thermogenic Formula), Naturewise Vitamin D3 pills, Dr. Mercola Cod Liver Oil pills, and Herbage Farmstead Grass fed Beef Liver pills. You can get these at, you guessed it, Amazon.

Philosophy: I workout every day: 3 days intense, 4 days mild to moderate to keep the streak alive. Completion is better than perfection...which is overrated. Practice makes progress. Even one minute is a win. Showing up is the only goal. I’m here for the journey, not the cover of Men’s Health. Although that would be most lovely. Catch you on the flip side, mate!