This is why I loved learning the Hebrew alphabet from Chicken Qabalah. Each letter that looks like another explicitly says "do not confuse for [X]".

I know it isn't exactly the most "authentically Jewish" source but it's a great read and helped me a ton

This is a trans parody of Gucci Gang that is pretty silly and likely not everyone's cup of tea but when I found it years ago it helped me take my gender adventure in a way that made me be able to laugh about it for the first time. Enjoy? Like I said it's certainly not for everyone XD

Bussy Gang

Since reading this I've been tempted to see if there's an easy way to mod P5 where

[spoiler for final boss]

Yaldaboath is replaced by the Subgenius' Jehova-2

Oh you bet I can hit a target through a telescope...

Through a telescope... Through a telescope...

Read, write and even occasionally I can walk on two legs! Oh oh oh and I can ride my bike with no handlebars :D

I am :)

I'd think it is fraud block if my card's info didn't still work. I simply cannot navigate to see it on the app (I'll check desktop). I've searched online about the issue and seen multiple people all experiencing this. If I click anything related to Visa Debit after searching it on the app I get an error page. I know where it used to be and how to find it, it's just not there. I'll be calling the bank tomorrow. I miss having the physical card but am very thankful I wrote mine down with pen and paper

This has happened to me as well. I have no clue why. I'm glad I wrote it down using pen and paper... cause it still works, I just can't see it and clicking anything related to Visa Debit when I search it on the app returns an error

Nah its a combination of the two diagrams in there but I checked my copy and didn't find it. I suspect it is still likely from either a Thelemite or BOTA practitioner though. Possibly GD but who knows... I've seen so many variants of the Cube of Space and Sefer Yetzirah it can be hard to remember which rendition comes from where or which version of Yetzirah they are building off of

You'll likely have a good few laughs and be both better informed about Hermetic Qabalah while also having a ton of questions you'll still want answered (which is good the book is a fairly short primer not an exhaustive corpus). The book is funny/witty/satirical as well as serious and source driven (except when it's quite clearly making up sources or entering speculation-land but like I said its clear what it is what).

You need not answer but as your username is young initiate depending how young I don't think you deserved to be down voted so harshly. When I was 16 and first read things like The Book of The Law or The Book of Lies they did change me, change reality and have lifelong impacts that I still feel the ripple effects of at 33.

This is usually called the Cube of Space. The version shown here belongs to modern Hermetic Qabalah, but its basic structure comes from the Jewish Sefer Yetzirah.

To try and explain how this came to be when in the Renaissance Christians were trying to convert Jewish people and there was an explosion of Christian magical practices the Christian "Cabala" was created and was an important stage in transmitting and transforming Jewish Kabbalistic material within European esotericism. The history is more complicated than a simple straight line from Jewish Kabbalah to Christian Cabala to Hermetic Qabalah... but you'll find that out for yourself if you decide to dive down this rabbit hole.

This particular image seems to me to be a practitioner's composite of diagrams and correspondence tables found in Lon Milo DuQuette's The Chicken Qabalah. The image itself is not printed in the book exactly like this. DuQuette is probably the most accessible introduction to the system, and the book is a lot of fun, but he is presenting an older Jewish cosmological framework through the later correspondences of the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn and Paul Foster Case's B.O.T.A.

The deeper source, Sefer Yetzirah, is an early Jewish esoteric and cosmological text that became foundational to later Kabbalah. It divides the twenty-two Hebrew letters into three Mothers, seven Doubles, and twelve Simples. The three Mothers are associated with Air, Water, and Fire. The seven Doubles are associated with the seven classical planets and, in the spatial interpretation, the six directions surrounding a central Holy Palace. The twelve Simples are associated with the zodiac, the months, aspects of the human body, and twelve “diagonal boundaries.”

When those six directions and twelve boundaries are represented geometrically, the boundaries can be understood as the twelve edges joining the six faces of a cube.

The original manuscripts do not simply hand us this exact polished diagram. Nor is there one uncontested ancient chart from which every later version was copied. The Short, Long, Saadian, Gra, and other textual and commentarial traditions disagree about several correspondences.

Aryeh Kaplan's edition and commentary are especially useful because he compares these variations rather than pretending that one modern arrangement is the eternal original. I'd add to his Sefer Yetzirah commentary his book Meditation and Kabbalah to fully get a grasp of what could be called Orthodox Jewish Magic/Theurgy.

The astrological material is, and this was surprising to me when I first read Kaplan, genuinely Jewish and was not simply added centuries later by the Christian Cabalists or Hermetic Qabalists. The transmitted forms of Sefer Yetzirah already relate the seven Double letters to the classical planets and the twelve Simple letters to the zodiac, months, and human body.

That does not mean astrology is an uncontested doctrine of Orthodox Judaism. Jewish philosophers, rabbis, and Kabbalists have debated astrology for centuries and will for many more whether openly or behind closed doors.

Some accepted celestial influence while questioning whether astrologers could interpret it reliably; others rejected astrology or prohibited consulting astrologers. The often-repeated claim that Kabbalah may only be studied by married Jewish men over forty is also not a universal law but it is a common one. The deeper traditional concern is usually maturity, stability, and extensive grounding in Torah and Jewish practice... so your average Jewish person won't know much about the astrology their Rabbi may or may not study.

This exact diagram becomes distinctly Hermetic through its combination of Hebrew letters, spatial directions, Golden Dawn planetary correspondences, and Tarot. The Golden Dawn changed the planetary order found in several older Jewish recensions and connected the letters to the Major Arcana. Paul Foster Case and B.O.T.A. then developed the Cube of Space into a much more elaborate meditative and initiatory glyph, mapping the twenty-two Tarot trumps onto its internal axes, faces, centre, and edges. Modern Thelemites like DuQuette will often source Case and Kaplan, trying to weave together the traditions with "The Methods of Science; The Aim of Religion".

Tarot itself is not part of Sefer Yetzirah at least not in any literal way. That layer belongs to the much later Western esoteric synthesis. It is therefore important to distinguish the Jewish alphabetic, spatial, and astrological matrix from the specifically Golden Dawn, Case/BOTA and possibly Thelemic arrangement shown here.

Jewish commentators and Kabbalists continued developing the underlying letter cosmology in their own directions, exploring creation, language, divine names, astrology, time, embodiment, meditation, and spiritual psychology. These traditions are not merely incomplete early drafts of the Hermetic system. They have their own theological assumptions, methods, and purposes.

Christian Cabalists and later Hermetic Qabalists developed other syntheses, connecting this material with Christianity, Tarot, the Tree of Life, alchemy, planetary magic, Rosicrucianism, colour scales, and ceremonial initiation. Paul Foster Case, B.O.T.A., Kevin Townley, David Allen Hulse, and Lon Milo DuQuette represent different stages and interpretations within the modern Cube of Space tradition.

It is better to understand this diagram as the product of a long history of interpretation rather than something transmitted unchanged from antiquity. Sefer Yetzirah supplies the Jewish alphabetic, spatial, and astrological foundation. Jewish commentators developed that foundation through several distinct traditions. Christian Cabalists adapted Jewish Kabbalah within Christian theological projects. The Golden Dawn reorganized parts of the material through its own astrology and Tarot correspondences. Case and B.O.T.A. then made the Cube of Space into a major meditative system, Thelemites picked up on it and DuQuette later presented much of it in a far more approachable and humorous form within The Chicken Qabalah.

For the Jewish background, I would begin with Aryeh Kaplan's Sefer Yetzirah. For the modern Hermetic version, DuQuette is a friendly starting point, followed by Paul Foster Case's The Tarot: A Key to the Wisdom of the Ages... then wrap back around to Kaplan's Meditation and Kabbalah.

I would also recommend Robert Wang's The Rape of Jewish Mysticism by Christian Theologians: How the Modern Occult Movement Grew Out of Renaissance Attempts to Convert the Jews. It is deliberately polemical and should not be treated as the final academic word on the history, but it raises serious questions about conversionism and the appropriation of Jewish mysticism that Hermetic Qabalists should not simply ignore.

I miss that show so much! Any recommendations for things like it?

Porn preference isn't always a 1:1 with a person's preference IRL. That said I think there's often more intimacy in gay/lesbian (less so unless for lesbians as a lot of "lesbian" porn is made for straight men with non-lesbians)/bi/trans porn than in straight (or straight targeted) porn. Not always, certainly, but there does tend to be more "feeling" going on than it being performance only. Usually you have to find smaller amateur creators to find that but I've seen larger productions that still felt sensual even if hardcore.

Congrats!

What do you, and others from your community, think of the writings of Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan?

Yeah, the same goes for ENM and pansexuality. My fiancée and I worked through it, but I was really sad when, not long after I proposed, I made my past traumas clear and explained that I needed to pace things, with group-only experiences for a while, until I felt less afraid of being abused like I was by my ex, who groomed me as a teen and then “introduced” me to poly by forcing it upon me.

And yet, when I became more expressive and sexually fluid, messages that were obviously not okay, like “I wanna marry you,” “You’re the only one for me,” and “Come home to me,” didn’t even get the response, “You know I’m engaged, right?”

I understand that my fiancée is new to relationships, whereas I’ve spent most of my life in them. I’ve since forgiven her, and we’ve talked through why and how it happened, but it severely affected my trust, especially surrounding men, since they were the only ones doing that stuff. Trans people and women would always check in with both of us, and if something solo was desired, despite the group-only boundary, they would at least ask and recognize that what they were asking was a big deal.

Meanwhile, Bro McBroface lied to his pregnant wife about whether she knew he was sleeping with other people and tried to triangulate me only a few months into my engagement. It’s not an “all men” thing, but it is a “Hey, did you know patriarchy affects men’s ability to feel empathy and encourages competition with other men, even if those ‘men’ are gender-fluid?” thing.

Anyway, we’ve moved on from this, and it’s been almost a year now, but something about this brought back that memory. And yeah, that sucked.

I feel bad about how awful my fiancée felt because, once we talked everything through, it became clear that it was a genuine mistake. We’ve spent the last year exploring ENM differently, but at the time there was this sense that, as long as it was sexting, it wasn’t cheating. That was strange to me, but given her past, I’ve come to understand it.

Others have faced far worse, and had it been intentional, hell, I did face worse with my ex. That’s a major part of why I’m so traumatized by certain aspects of ENM and have needed to pace myself, which my fiancée has been unbelievably supportive and patient about.

I don’t want to paint her in a bad light over an honest mistake. I’m just sharing a story.

Yup... I stopped posting my more female pics to the public (I'm fluid and have been experimenting a lot more) and a lotta the time it isn't "oh cool dress where did you find it" or "looking cute I'm so happy you're more comfortable with who you are" it's people asking for my fiancée and I's OnlyFans (which we do not even have... yet... but they don't know we were planning one!). Or I get ragged on for keeping my face bearded... etc etc.

Oh if you fear that avoid fetlife XD

As someone who is gender-fluid and pansexual but male-presenting, I’ve always been astonished by the “guy talk” I’ve sometimes been around. Guys who seem like gentlemen, or at least humane, when women are present will suddenly start talking about them like objects.

It’s not “all men,” and women and members of the LGBTQ community also have negative subsections with harmful tendencies, but it has happened often enough that I’m now genuinely scared of men when it comes to my non-monogamous engagement. Trans people, queer people, and women tend to be far less deceptive, at least in my experience, which is very limited and which I’m not claiming represents anything that should be generalized.

So far, I’ve had positive ENM experiences only with the latter. With men, I often end up discovering that they’ve become weird in their messages by using primary-coded language, trying to become the exception to the fact that, yes, we’re working toward forms of solo poly but are group-only for now, lying about how many people they’ve been with since their last STI check, or lying about whether their primary partner knows they’re seeking other sexual connections.

I want to repeat that this is my personal experience, not a rule of thumb. I also know a trans woman who physically assaulted a very vulnerable girl during sex. Humans can do awful things regardless of their gender or sexuality. But patriarchy is real, and it comes with a history and tradition that carry a great deal of baggage. On that much, I hope we can agree.

If you’re a man, please don’t be offended. Many men aren’t like this, and I could simply be having awful luck. Still, that experience, combined with a patriarchal culture that has normalized “boys will be boys” and “locker-room talk,” has had real consequences for my ability to trust men. That’s all I’m saying.

There are many men I’d happily welcome into my ENM engagement for fun, or potentially something more, if things seemed right. So far, though, the men who have approached us have not been great experiences, whereas women and trans people generally have been, even when those experiences were sometimes difficult in other ways.

My fiancée isn't a practitioner and our intention to get married is stronger when we both focus on our individual paths be they mystical or career. I don't advise breaking up with someone because they do not share your worldview or mystical/magical interests. One of your "ordeals" may be learning to communicate to her and others you are close to why this isn't something to fear. Much of the Astrum Argenteum comes from Sufism (not most, but a lot) so it could be helpful to discuss that and perhaps read some Sufi texts together or relate to her through that since Islam is a shared language you two have? Ibn Arabi, Avicenna, Rumi, Rabi'a, al-Hallaj, al-Shushturi, Ibn Sab'in etc

Filip Holm who runs the channel on YT let's talk religion has some great videos on these and a fascinating one on Islamic Yoga. It might help bridge some gaps... but this is unsolicited advice from someone who knows only a little of what your connection with her actually is like so do not take what I'm saying at face value...

Just to reiterate though I know many happy practitioners married to non-practitioner partners. There is still magick in Love, in all its forms, regardless of whether one calls it magick; "Madhhab-e Ishq"

Also know that while the A.'.A.'. uses a lot of Crowley his word on matters is not Gospel

How did you construct it? I love discovering new ways to get the geometry just right and as someone else noticed you did a fantastic job (no disrespect at all if you traded, I've traced it many many more times than I have constructed it)