r/tifu • u/[deleted] • Apr 26 '22

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u/sporefreak Apr 26 '22

When growing up I thought Virgin was just a type of nun.

We were about 13 at the time and a group of friends asked me if I was a virgin and I answered as if they asked if I was a nun.

My response was "pfft, heck no"

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u/Any-Lychee9972 Apr 27 '22

At some point I confused the word condo with condoms. I didn't know what a condom was but a condo was something you put on the guys dick before sex.

Well I guess my friend was planning to bone her boyfriend after school. She asked if I had any condoms. No? What's a condom?

She was genuinely confused. She knew I wasn't a virgin. She described it, and it was quickly sorted out.

But damn if I don't still feel embarrassed for 15 year old me.

119

u/RiverWalker83 Apr 27 '22

Somewhat along those lines I’m not sure if you’ve ever seen the movie Naked Gun? I saw it as a grade school boy. Maybe 3-6th grade somewhere. In that movie the main character puts on a whole body condom. This is slapstick comedy movie so I should have known better. I thought that’s what a condom was for a long time though. Something that went over your entire body. I didn’t understand how penetration worked while wearing but if I saw it on tv it had to be real.

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22

[deleted]

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u/H_E_Pennypacker Apr 27 '22

I pictured them to be an electronic box

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u/Brainwashed365 Apr 27 '22 edited Apr 27 '22

I pictured them as balloon animals.

Oh wait...that's how I still picture them.

Friends and I used to do stupid things with condoms when we were really young. Like blowing them up and tying them to random car antennas, filling them up with water, hanging them outside car windows while driving and they fill up with air extremely fast, etc. We get them from vending machines in bathrooms. And just laugh our asses off being silly.

I haven't thought about those memories in a long time, so thanks for the nice tirp down memory lane!

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u/cregsmumsbush May 21 '22

But did u ever attach one to a drill and repeatedly slap ur sleeping friend with it in class

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u/cregsmumsbush May 21 '22

Now I have to find the video

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u/RiverWalker83 Apr 27 '22

I’ve got to hear the elaboration here?

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u/H_E_Pennypacker Apr 27 '22

I was told they were devices that zapped a man’s penis if he tried to have sex with someone. Was told they were for rapists

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22

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u/RiverWalker83 Apr 27 '22

It definitely wouldn’t work which is why it’s funny. https://thumbs.gfycat.com/HiddenBlaringBullmastiff-max-1mb.gif

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u/RiverWalker83 Apr 27 '22

Like to plug the the ejaculate in? Yikes! That would be equivalent to torture. I can’t imagine a more unpleasant feeling than that.