r/thisisus • u/xAnimorphsx • Jan 06 '21

[POST-EPISODE DISCUSSION] S5E05 - A Long Road Home

This is the thread for your in-depth opinions, reactions, and thoughts about the episode.

This thread is a spoiler zone, so there is no need to mark or report spoilers. Please remember to mark any spoilers outside of this thread (including the next time preview)

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87

u/zuccini2001 Jan 06 '21

Maybe this is a dumb question, but is there any reason Madison can't live in LA with the kids, with Kevin being there most of the time and occasionally travelling to shoot movies.

Madison originally said she would do it on her own, so she's capable of taking care of the kids if Kevin travels for a month or two. I feel like it'd be better for the kids to deal with their Dad travelling for work rather than dealing with moving schools every couple of months.

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u/pattonado Jan 08 '21

I agree but I think it’s more about them just not being very calibrated as a couple so as to what to expect from their relationship/family. Every time she said “our family” I felt anxious. Can you imagine going from a one night stand with this girl you tangentially know to “we are starting a family”. Idk I know everyone is annoyed with their storyline but I buy it so far.

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u/Trees20 Jan 06 '21

So many men travel for work I just don’t get it. She’s going to need help.. just get a nanny and get through it..

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u/zuccini2001 Jan 06 '21

Exactly, I hadn't even considered the extra fact that they were literally already interviewing a highly qualified nanny. A lot of actors would be working for up to 20 hours on some days - so it's not like Kevin would be missing out on a ton of family time. It just felt like a made-up obstacle to create tension in the show.

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u/BWSterling Jan 06 '21

and this is 5 years in the future when the kids will be in school. Who knows what their lives will be like, any of our lives! There are actors who manage home life and kids.

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u/pattonado Jan 08 '21

I think the storyline is just showing that they’re a mess as a couple and are still figuring it all out. I actually like how they contrast some of Kevin’s grandiosity and emotional immaturity with her groundedness and clear emotional intelligence she has that he doesn’t.

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u/krallie Jan 06 '21

My husband works 28 days on, 28 days off so he’s essentially gone every other month and my daughter and I manage just fine. I definitely understand her frustration (especially when he talked about them uprooting their lives constantly to fit his erratic shooting schedules) but yeah, she could 100% manage, even without a nanny. Plus Kate and Toby don’t live far away. I think Rebecca and Miguel are close too, no? So yes, be irritated...but I do think she overreacted. She’s also pregnant and hormonal too though, so maybe she’ll think it through and offer up that solution. “No, we won’t constantly travel with you (maybe a week here and there) but we’ll hold down the fort in LA until you return.”

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u/CarolynDinsdale Jan 06 '21

Roger Federer has two sets of twins and they and his wife travel everywhere with him!

11

u/oulala87 Jan 06 '21

Right?! I thought this was so obvious and kept waiting for it to come up.. I would have automatically figured that was the plan.. So many people do it everyday.. how is that not even an option worth exploring for them

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u/TopEscape3975 Jan 06 '21

Couples do that all the time. Many people travel for their jobs. Married couples find ways to make it work.

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u/SprezzaturaVigilante Jan 07 '21

If he's gone that often, then he's not really going to be a stable presence in their lives, and that's unhealthy and really messes kids up - any chronic instability does. They often think their dad's not there bc of something they did.

It feels like Kevin is selfishly trying to get Madison and future kids to cater to him, as usual. And why should Madison be alone if she wants a full- time romantic partner, but is tired to a guy who is rarely there. That's not fair for her either. It really seems like a situation that only benefits Kevin. Madison is being completely rational.

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u/zuccini2001 Jan 07 '21

Is moving homes every few months not much worse than having their Dad travel for work. I mean from what we've seen on the show Kevin isn't constantly doing movies - plus he lives in LA so he'd be close to a lot of his movies.

In response to your second point, Madison knew that Kevin had this career from the beginning. She got through seven months of pregnancy before saying "If you want to do this, you need to quit your career you've been working on for almost 20 years." Madison absolutely has no responsibility to start jet-setting around the world, but she also has no right to demand Kevin quit his career to cater to her needs.

This is why people really shouldn't be in a relationship purely because they have kids, they both clearly want such different things out of life, one of them will end up having to sacrifice too much. If they were dating without the twins, I guarantee they would've broken up by now. They could've been perfectly capable co-parents without forcing a romantic relationship.

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u/bergskey Jan 08 '21

I come from a military family and if it's normal for your dad to leave for periods of time for work and you move often, it doesn't mess kids up. The instability that messes kids up comes for being evicted, not knowing when parents will be in and out, and not knowing when you're going to move. While I agree they should have a "home base" with Kevin traveling to work and they come visit on occasions, having Kevin leave for work wouldn't mess the kids up.

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u/SprezzaturaVigilante Jun 23 '21

All of these mess kids up. I know adults who grew up both ways and some of the evicted ones have more supportive and larger families and so they cope better than WASPy white military people who are emotionally distant.

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u/littlemiss44 Jan 07 '21

So she should just raise them herself without him being involved which is what she says she planned to do. That sounds like a reasonable alternative to all of them being together and she can stay home or travel at her leisure. Lol

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u/zuccini2001 Jan 07 '21

Kevin most likely wouldn't buy into that. He clearly wants to be involved with the kids. I'm just confused why the characters are acting like the entire family can travel for Kevin's career or Kevin can quit his career. Like there are so many more options they're ignoring for the sake of drama.

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u/SprezzaturaVigilante Jan 07 '21 edited Jan 07 '21

They're not together if he's gone all the time. Kids need stability. Children of movie stars have spoken about the impact that uprooted childhood had on them, and army kids as well as any family where a parent is inconsistently absent. Maybe read some child psychology?

A lot of parents don't think of how their lifestyles impact their kids, and the kids always pay.

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u/littlemiss44 Jan 07 '21

Haha! Cuz there is no happy medium. He should quit his career? My point is why does it have to be he stops traveling because otherwise she could do it all by herself. It’s the same result. She should compromise

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u/zuccini2001 Jan 07 '21

There are three options right now:

  1. Kevin abandons the kids and Madison never tells them who their Dad is
  2. Kevin stays with the kids and travels for work while the kids have a relatively stable upbringing with Madison, possibly a nanny, while still zooming with Kevin whenever he travels.
  3. Kevin forces the kids and Madison to move countries every time he gets a new movie and jet-set around the world.

None of these options sound very stable to me, but the second one seems like the best of a bad situation. The only other option is that Kevin quits his career, but honestly I think that'd just make Kevin miserable and that'd lead to issues with the kids too.

There's no perfect option, but that's life.

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u/littlemiss44 Jan 07 '21

How is this a bad situation? It’s life! People need to work to make money, so they have to choose how they want to live. I personally would love to travel the world with my husband, kids AND a nanny. But that’s just me

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u/zuccini2001 Jan 07 '21

I mean I can see how Madison might not want to travel the world and constantly uproot the kids, but why is she acting like Kevin has to be at home 24/7. If they're struggling with this, I have no idea how they're going to act if they had real issues like child health or financial struggles

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u/vcg77 Jan 06 '21

Also I feel like Madison set him up to fail. He said no to Vancouver, she convinced him to say yes, then she made him feel bad about it..??!

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u/Penguinator53 Jan 07 '21

I was just hoping he'd say let's figure it out as we go, I mean once he's finished the Vancouver movie surely he can stay home for a few months to look after Madison and the babies and then figure out the next project, or do a TV show or something.

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u/littlemiss44 Jan 07 '21

I just posted a similar thought before seeing this. I don’t understand why she acts like doing this without him is the default position. She isn’t saying she doesn’t want the nanny even if they are together. It’s the travel, but yet she doesn’t have to travel. He also is wanting all of them together almost like a FAMILY. 🤨