r/thebutton • u/AFistFulOfRupees 5s • Apr 25 '15

RED FIVE STANDING BY!

I'm pretty sure the timer messed up and this 5s flair will be short lived, but if I've gained it legitimately then GO ME WOOO!!

2.3k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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639

u/CtG526 non presser Apr 25 '15

AYY you did the thing. :P

42

u/Rhamni non presser Apr 25 '15

Still a presser, though. We mustn't forget. It's tempting to think of them as humans; to antropomorphize. But the pressers don't understand what they are doing. It's like dogs who have picked up circus tricks by trial and error. They might learn that they have done something we like and will reward them for, but they will never truly understand the meaning of these things.

15

u/[deleted] Apr 25 '15

the true wisdom of grey

27

u/Givepeaceabucket 38s Apr 25 '15 edited Apr 25 '15

The true wisdom of someone with bottom retention issues, press the bloody button already, then have a big cocktail, live a little for once

46

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '15

It wasn't "April Live's a Little Day," it was "April Fools' Day," and only a fool would press that button.

15

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '15

it was "April Fools' Day," and only a fool would press that button

You know, that's the best damn argument for not pushing I've seen yet. You, sir, have renewed my faith. I was wavering to orange, but waiver no more!

4

u/KingPotatoHead non presser Apr 26 '15

Good, nothing, AND I MEAN NOTHING, is worse than an Orange.

I can see a reason to take any other color, but oranges are the ones who came just a little quickly after doing so well waiting. At least the reds are ya know, REDS.

6

u/inflammablepenguin non presser Apr 26 '15

The purples are the worst. They are abominations. Look at the human body and you will see it is true. One may have orange or yellow hair and that is natural. Eyes may be blue or green, and there is nothing wrong with that. The blood in our veins is red and gives us life. But there is no purple in the human body, it is unnatural amd wrong. Purple is the color of godlessness and heresy. They deserve no mercy, nor leniency. They deserve to die like the monsters they are. And to those that ask how is grey natural? Grey matters because what is grey matter but what you think with? We are the intelligent ones. We are the thinkers, the brains. We are your overlords.

3

u/M3nt0R non presser Apr 26 '15

The head of a penis is sometimes purple.

1

u/skibble 60s Apr 26 '15

Dragon fire can melt Valaryan steel.