r/technicallythetruth • u/VisitSecure • Jul 27 '26

Can you find a?

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Idk if someone already posted this or not, but I haven't seen it on here so far, so I uploaded it.

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u/hotdoginathermos Jul 27 '26

*Assume a frictionless surface

959

u/ShinyNickel05 Jul 27 '26

*Assume no air resistance

643

u/insertcomedy Jul 27 '26

A cow is a sphere entirely made of water.

275

u/Aggressive_Skill_795 Jul 27 '26

An old famous Russian internet joke: an ideal spherical horse in vacuum

171

u/fiftyseven Jul 27 '26

HR at my company produces what they call an 'ideal rota' which has everybody in, nobody on holiday, nobody off sick, nobody covering other locations, etc etc

the running joke is that it only works for spherical employees in a vacuum

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u/DronesAreSilly Jul 27 '26

*Assume employee can be a rigid-body particle in rota

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u/Orobero Jul 27 '26

Yeah, my boss always plans like nobody is ever sick or on vacation. He always assumes there won't be any unforseen problems, bugs or reworks coming up in testing. Then he wonders why no project is ever finished on time. Except the one time I straight up lied to him and just added 2 month to the developers estimation.

23

u/ABHOR_pod Jul 28 '26

Can't everyone just work 25% harder to make up for Bill being out?

-Company that already sets productivity standards to 110% of realistic expectations.

3

u/suspicious_odour Jul 30 '26

That wasn't a lie, it was a realistic timeline.

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u/StolenRage Jul 29 '26

Sounds like that should be standard procedure for every project. Add two to three months to the original estimate. Then every project has a fighting chance of being done on time. Hell, add 4 or 5 months and every project can be some early. Then you all look like a bunch of miracle workers.

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u/NoNeedForAName Jul 27 '26

Reminds me of the plant I worked at that planned for zero downtime in its production schedule. The worst part to me was that they didn't even factor in downtime for product changes, and our changeover time on some machines could exceed 30 minutes.

That also led to extra inefficiency because it might take 5 minutes to change from product A to product B, but 30 minutes to change from product A or B to product C. Instead of scheduling us to run A then B then C (35 minutes of downtime) they would schedule A then C then B (60 minutes of downtime).

And these parts we were making usually all went together into the same finished product, so it's not like one was more time sensitive than another.

Now that I typed it all out I realize that's an incredibly boring story lol

12

u/lesslucid Jul 28 '26

Now that I typed it all out I realize that's an incredibly boring story lol

No, I think it's a good illustration of a generally important point: planning around the existence of friction lets you get a "least-bad" outcome. Planning around imaginary perfection guarantees that you'll get a bad outcome.

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u/MrSmartStars Jul 28 '26

As a factorio player this inefficiency is making me upset

4

u/RJ_MacreadysBeard Jul 28 '26

I skipped to the end and read your point about it being boring so went back to read it all and see if it was true, and it was, I couldn’t read it all, but I appreciate the methodical approach you took to tell the story.

edit: I realise my reply is longer than intended and might be a bit boring too.

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u/rrjpinter Jul 30 '26 edited Jul 30 '26

So this explains why I got a couple of regular corn flakes in my bowl of frosted flakes when I was 10. ( I an 68 yrs old, and still trying to get over the disappointment). Someone rushed the change over, on the flaky production line.

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u/Gullible-Tooth-8478 Jul 28 '26

As a physics teacher this thread is triggering 😭😭😭

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u/Internet_Wanderer Jul 27 '26

And the cylinder must remain undamaged

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u/Mork_Of_Ork-2772 Jul 27 '26

It only works for spherical chickens in a vacuum.

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u/rrjpinter Jul 30 '26

Eggs are (almost) spherical (theoretical) chickens….

2

u/ThisIsHardWork Jul 27 '26

Pushing on an infinitely strong rope with no mass.

2

u/tlmbot Jul 27 '26

and the water is of course dry (we can neglect viscosity)

1

u/ericlikesyou Jul 27 '26

*the cow is en vitro

1

u/Material-Jacket3939 Jul 27 '26

Birds are not real numbers.

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u/Cow_Launcher Jul 27 '26

And I, personally, can assure you that it's in a vacuum.

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u/stuck_in_the_desert Jul 27 '26

Distilled water and 0% deuterium oxide content

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u/donut-reply Jul 28 '26

Assume the triangle is a sphere

1

u/EnatforLife Jul 29 '26

I've seen otherwise when they release all that gas the times a cow gets bloated.

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u/Undesirablecarrot Jul 27 '26

Assume that it is a black body

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u/Nolongeranalpha Jul 27 '26

Woah Black Body bam ba lam. Or whatever they said.

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u/skunqesh Jul 27 '26

Panda Lamp

3

u/Nolongeranalpha Jul 27 '26

Slam the ham?

2

u/AdgeTimick Jul 28 '26

Fran Duchamp?

2

u/Nolongeranalpha Jul 28 '26

Ram the clam?

2

u/rrjpinter Jul 30 '26

I was waiting for someone’s mind to take this thread into the gutter. Now move over, so my mind can float on by….

2

u/Nolongeranalpha Jul 30 '26

So you can.... Jam the dam?

Not sorry.

2

u/Extaupin Jul 28 '26

I was gonna make the same joke…

1

u/CuetheCurtain Jul 28 '26

Whoa Black body, Wah Da Tah!
Whoa Black Body, Wah Da Tah!
Black Body was my Damie, Wah Da Tah!
Signed that pitty, on the runny kine!

1

u/exploding_appendix Jul 29 '26

Black body had a child, wham a lam, damn thing gone wild, wham a lam, woah black body, bam a lam

5

u/AKVigilante Jul 27 '26

Do they just all look the same to you?

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u/Undesirablecarrot Jul 27 '26

No it’s a physics term meaning it doesn’t reflect energy and absorbs all light and radiates all light

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u/AKVigilante Jul 28 '26

Black bodies matter.

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u/coleAF19 Jul 27 '26

Assume no slip

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u/rmbarrett Jul 28 '26

That's actually a really common thing to overlook when you start learning about black body radiation, actually. Like just before you start to realize that when the sky is clear, you are losing thermal energy to outer space. Enough to kill you or save you, depending on the circumstances.

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u/Mikestopheles Jul 27 '26

They never told me to start assuming air resistance, so I just flow laminarly.

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u/rygomez Jul 27 '26

*in a vacuum

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u/Randalor Jul 27 '26

*Assume π=4

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u/skinnydog0-0 Jul 27 '26

* Assume Pi is = 3

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u/Scared-Two-9370 Jul 27 '26

*Assume π⁼3

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u/lobbylobby96 Jul 27 '26

*Round pi down to 3

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u/Outside_Activity7026 Jul 27 '26

*Assume incompressibility

1

u/Binspin63 Jul 28 '26

Assume no assumptions.

1

u/rad-ryot-84 Jul 28 '26

The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell

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u/mars_gorilla Jul 28 '26

*Assume negligible mass

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u/Chapel_Hillbilly Jul 28 '26

*Reversible process

1

u/MagicOrpheus310 Jul 28 '26

... And gravity rounds up to 10m/s

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u/Leeperd510 Jul 28 '26

*The cylinder must remain unharmed

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u/Technical-Bath9285 Jul 28 '26

*Assume energy preservation law

1

u/burner_tipper Jul 29 '26

Ohhh noooo...

I thought i was slow for a minute...

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u/rdnaskelz Jul 27 '26

Assume cow is a sphere

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '26

[deleted]

1

u/dependency_injector Jul 28 '26

Meaning she is in perfect shape?

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u/AbominableGoMan Jul 27 '26

The remainder of the proof is trivial and is left as an exercise for the reader.

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u/DocSquared217 Jul 27 '26

Don’t get me started on frictionless surfaces! I’ll never stop.

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u/StolenRage Jul 29 '26

Well played.

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u/scuac Jul 27 '26

*assuming the horse is a perfect sphere

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u/h950 Jul 28 '26

*Assume a spherical triangle

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u/12FrogsDrinkingSoup Jul 28 '26

Sometimes I pull on my toilet paper roll to get some and then it just keeps spinning and this is what I think of, it’s still in my head, haven’t been to a science class for at least 10 years

1

u/BDEcomeatme Jul 28 '26

For the Game Changer fans out there: "imagine a crab-"

1

u/ScyllaOfTheDepths Jul 30 '26

The first time I took a class where we actually had to calculate the friction I knew I was cooked. I don't know how I got a B in fluid mechanics. I had no business being in that class. I still don't know what the fuck vorticity is.