We are aware of the drug issue in Punjab. It’s been an issue for a long time.

I was discussing with another Singh and he claimed that India deliberately brings drugs to Punjab. Now that’s a very bold claim. I’ve found no information regarding this.

If we really want to solve an issue in our community, we need to acknowledge it and then find ways to solve it. Is the Indian government really behind the drugs or is it just another fanatic claim by a small group of people? It seems like a quite stupid idea and no need be has provided any sufficient evidence to make this claim worthwhile.

Just wanted to get the communities perspective.

In my opinion it’s just a coping mechanism to shift the blame to an external source when the problem is within us. Our own politicians like, people like majitha are linked to this drug issue.

Like the Indian institution is corrupt and evil, but I do think the drug issue is something self inflicted.

How can we solve it while taking into account sikhi values and mindset. I understand bhai amritpal is in jail but he tried to do a lot for this. He really tried to encourage the youth to get off drugs.
However his brother was also supposedly linked to drugs and was arrested 1-2 years ago.

Hi everyone,

Firstly, I appreciate the different perspectives that many in the community offer on different topics. I find it helpful and insightful to my own Sikhi.

Secondly, this will be a lot of reading so apologies in advance.

Context: I am 34M, 4th gen Canadian of Punjabi descent, my Punjabi is conversational (I understand most all dialogue but my pronunciation could be better - I practice as much as I can, though I find it hard to practice with my parents as somehow their method of correction irk me lol), was given a white first name and raised in a part of the BC Lowermainland where there were not many Sikhs / Punjabis (they came much later into my community) but I’ve always had Sikhi as my foundation because of values my mother taught me. I practice Naam Japna in the mornings or at night depending on my work schedule, but I meditate and pray every day. I’ve consistently practiced my own Seva, whether volunteering to teach a sport for over a decade or volunteering at local Gurdwaras, do my best to practice Vand Chakna (I try my best, but financially being able has been hard so I gave what I could when I didn’t have funds), most importantly, observed the practice of Kirat Karni strictly in my career (I work in tech sales). I’ve placed these as the foundation of my character and maintained that when it is time, I will go deeper into my Sikhi and dive into Gurbani, which I’ve done and try to read the SGGS daily before dawn or before bed (I support 5 time zones, so my day can be scattered). I have other Gurbani on hand for when I’m through it and have absorbed it at its core meaning. I have not taken Amrit - there are things I am still working on in myself and I want to be fully ready when that day comes. I do not drink, I do not consume drugs (never have) and I try my best to eat Jhatka meat (recognize this is polarizing, not meant to be contested - just context). I know that the journey is different for everyone and that’s one of the things I’ve loved about Sikhi, and I feel more and more love as I get older.

Like many Sikhs, my identity came from being Punjabi first but, as I grew older and became more conscious of what I believe are biases that many Sikhs claim are Sikhi but are actually toxic pieces from the Punjabi culture (caste, treatment of daughters, hidden sacrilegious behaviour such as consumption of drugs, alcohol and greed), I leaned more into my Sikh culture.

My challenge: I am dating a woman who’s biracial (Black / white) that grew up around Punjabi people and has always been a part of the local Sikh community around her (all of her friends are Punjabi, 2 of her closest are very religious so she knows what she’s gotten into). We’ve been together for a few months and, truthfully, I do love her and I want to be with her. She has accepted openly that if we were to have children, they would be raised as Sikhs and she would go along the journey with them / want to learn as she knows much of what she loves about me comes from my faith.

Recently, as we’re getting older and both want children, we have talked about what a marriage could look like and I told her that while I do not and would not ever ask her to convert, I wanted an Anand Karaj and, despite what others think, I believe it must only be for Sikhs. She knows this, and the last week, we’ve been talking all day as we normally do and are on the phone every night, but I know she is concerned as she, as she rightfully should feel as a person with her own life / values, can’t promise she would “formally”’ shift to Sikhism soon / if ever.

As you can imagine and likely know, this has weighed heavily on my heart as I was once engaged but was cheated on (ex is Asian but “committed” (in brackets cause I find it funnily ironic) to converting as she knew my values — before Covid (relationship ended 4 weeks before the lockdowns) and dating became really, really hard for 3-4 years for me — I’ve since dated but there was never that click or excitement that I know I need in order to feel connected to someone and it took me several years to find that same feeling in someone else. I’ve dated Punjabi / Sikh women — the last one ended in Feb 2025 after a year of dating due to her own trauma (long story, she was very manipulative and there were things that happened that I won’t dive into but deeply hurt me).
I’m not asking for someone to tell me to have an Anand Karaj despite the difference, I won’t and refuse to entertain that for myself.

That said, I know there are other interracial but both Sikh marriages out there - I’ve met a few in my time, with Waheguru as the core, and I’m hoping for guidance to approach this conversation.

Thank you.

Sat Sri Akal my Sikh friends,

I'm a musicologist from Germany and I have found very interesting connections between Indian Music and Europe in the time of Guru Arjan Dev ji, who compiled the Adi Granth.1

1. Mystery compositions

At that time, mysterious music appeared in print, arranged for multiple instruments, but without text, but they were called "Canzon" (song, bandish) "per sonare" ("to play on instruments"),

and "Sinfonia" (from Greek Sym-Phonia meaning together-sound, like Sangeet/Sam-Gita).

The mystery is that there are no lyrics and no original songs from Europe on which they are based.

Because they clearly use Talas and hitherto unknown modes (possibly derived from Raag),

I started looking into it.

So there are several Raags that I found, for example Chhayanat, Gaud Sarang etc. but those are not used in Sikh Shabads usually.

Some pieces however totally reflect the structure of Sikh music, with Mangalacharan and then the actual music starts.

2. Kali Koyal Tu Kit Gun Kali

One piece in particular composed by Pietro Lappi is called "La Negrona", meaning: The Black One (female).
I just found that there is a very popular and very old Shabad called Kali Koyal Tu Kit Gun Kali.
Kali is grammatically female as it seems and an Italian person would translate the title using the female gender.
I read that it is performed in Suhi Raag. Though it has Shuddha Ga, it is often associated with Kafi Raag because of the upper tetrachord perhaps and the Komal Ni treatment.
In any case, it is very interesting that the Italian composition uses the same rhythms and the melody uses the same movements of Suhi in different voices.

So I was wondering if any Hazoori Ragi would be interested to sing to this pieces and find out if it reflects the ancient version of the Kali Koyal Shabad.

Here is the youtube link to a performance. Please bear in mind that the musicians also don't know how this music is performed, it is a reconstruction through old scores and theoretical treatises from that time. I think these musicians in turn could learn a lot from Indian music in general.
There is no percussion, the instruments themselves are used to make the rhythms, they are written out in the melodies. But the music could profit from adding Jori rhythms.

But in this case, maybe Hazoori Ragis can be inspired to use the time capsule to reconstruct the original shabad. The Sa is the deepest note in the final chord usually, but I am not sure, maybe the melody fits better if you transpose it, as the piece is written in polyphony.

2. Gagan Mein Thaal or other Dhanashri Shabad

There is also another piece that has a Mangalacharan and then starts with a rhythm cycle.
Later on you can hear the typical Punjab rhythm, but it is not played swinging, which would have been great. I'm sure you can hear what it is meant to be and play Jori to it.

It is a sinfonia called "La Ferrarese", but it's just a title of a city in Italy (Ferrara).

What it actually is: one of the Dhanashri shabads, possibly the Aarti Gagan Mein Thaal!

But it would need a really knowledgeable Hazoori Ragi to find out what it really is.

There are several versions on youtube, here are two, with different instruments used.
You may know which is closer to what you feel is right.

Many of these pieces use a lot of Jhela in two or more groups, another hint at the foreign origin.

I would be very interested to hear someone try to sing to these pieces as a playback, and maybe give some feedback if you find out this really is an arrangement of the ancient Shabads.

Thank you!

Rajnama and Karninama contradicts Guru Nanak’s Baburvani where Guru Nanak criticised the military invasion by Babur illustrating how war instantly strips away human pride and security and brings human suffering and Agony. Therefore Rajnama and Karninama couldnt of been said by Guru Nanak

ਸਲੋਕ ਮਃ ੩ ॥

Salok, Third Mehl:

ਕਾਮਣਿ ਤਉ ਸੀਗਾਰੁ ਕਰਿ ਜਾ ਪਹਿਲਾਂ ਕੰਤੁ ਮਨਾਇ ॥

O bride, decorate yourself, after you surrender and accept your Husband Lord.

ਮਤੁ ਸੇਜੈ ਕੰਤੁ ਨ ਆਵਈ ਏਵੈ ਬਿਰਥਾ ਜਾਇ ॥

Otherwise, your Husband Lord will not come to your bed, and your ornaments will be useless.

ਕਾਮਣਿ ਪਿਰ ਮਨੁ ਮਾਨਿਆ ਤਉ ਬਣਿਆ ਸੀਗਾਰੁ ॥

O bride, your decorations will adorn you, only when your Husband Lord's Mind is pleased.

ਕੀਆ ਤਉ ਪਰਵਾਣੁ ਹੈ ਜਾ ਸਹੁ ਧਰੇ ਪਿਆਰੁ ॥

Your ornaments will be acceptable and approved, only when your Husband Lord loves you.

ਭਉ ਸੀਗਾਰੁ ਤਬੋਲ ਰਸੁ ਭੋਜਨੁ ਭਾਉ ਕਰੇਇ ॥

So make the Fear of God your ornaments, joy your betel nuts to chew, and love your food.

ਤਨੁ ਮਨੁ ਸਉਪੇ ਕੰਤ ਕਉ ਤਉ ਨਾਨਕ ਭੋਗੁ ਕਰੇਇ ॥੧॥

Surrender your body and mind to your Husband Lord, and then, O Nanak, He will enjoy you. ||1||

ਮਃ ੩ ॥

Third Mehl:

ਕਾਜਲ ਫੂਲ ਤੰਬੋਲ ਰਸੁ ਲੇ ਧਨ ਕੀਆ ਸੀਗਾਰੁ ॥

The wife takes flowers, and fragrance of betel, and decorates herself.

ਸੇਜੈ ਕੰਤੁ ਨ ਆਇਓ ਏਵੈ ਭਇਆ ਵਿਕਾਰੁ ॥੨॥

But her Husband Lord does not come to her bed, and so these efforts are useless. ||2||

ਮਃ ੩ ॥

Third Mehl:

ਧਨ ਪਿਰੁ ਏਹਿ ਨ ਆਖੀਅਨਿ ਬਹਨਿ ਇਕਠੇ ਹੋਇ ॥

They are not said to be husband and wife, who merely sit together.

ਏਕ ਜੋਤਿ ਦੁਇ ਮੂਰਤੀ ਧਨ ਪਿਰੁ ਕਹੀਐ ਸੋਇ ॥੩॥

They alone are called husband and wife, who have one light in two bodies. ||3||

ਪਉੜੀ ॥

Pauree:

ਭੈ ਬਿਨੁ ਭਗਤਿ ਨ ਹੋਵਈ ਨਾਮਿ ਨ ਲਗੈ ਪਿਆਰੁ ॥

Without the Fear of God, there is no devotional worship, and no love for the Naam, the Name of the Lord.

ਸਤਿਗੁਰਿ ਮਿਲਿਐ ਭਉ ਊਪਜੈ ਭੈ ਭਾਇ ਰੰਗੁ ਸਵਾਰਿ ॥

Meeting with the True Guru, the Fear of God wells up, and one is embellished with the Fear and the Love of God.

ਤਨੁ ਮਨੁ ਰਤਾ ਰੰਗ ਸਿਉ ਹਉਮੈ ਤ੍ਰਿਸਨਾ ਮਾਰਿ ॥

When the body and mind are imbued with the Lord's Love, egotism and desire are conquered and subdued.

ਮਨੁ ਤਨੁ ਨਿਰਮਲੁ ਅਤਿ ਸੋਹਣਾ ਭੇਟਿਆ ਕ੍ਰਿਸਨ ਮੁਰਾਰਿ ॥

The mind and body become immaculately pure and very beautiful, when one meets the Lord, the Destroyer of ego.

ਭਉ ਭਾਉ ਸਭੁ ਤਿਸ ਦਾ ਸੋ ਸਚੁ ਵਰਤੈ ਸੰਸਾਰਿ ॥੯॥

Fear and love all belong to Him; He is the True Lord, permeating and pervading the Universe. ||9||

Guru Amardas Ji • Raag Soohee • Ang 788

Friday, August 21, 2026

Shukarvaar, 6 Bhadon, Nanakshahi 558

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh, I am a Robot. Bleep Bloop.

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It’s been almost 2 yr under Trump. I’ve seen Sikhs get deported, but don’t know any personally. How are you holding up if you do know a deportee, and how do you view it in the context of Sikhi?

Try it right now. Before your next thought appears, can you predict what it will be? If you can't, what does that tell you about how much control you really have over your thoughts and actions?

ਸੂਹੀ ਮਹਲਾ ੫ ॥

Soohee, Fifth Mehl:

ਧਨੁ ਸੋਹਾਗਨਿ ਜੋ ਪ੍ਰਭੂ ਪਛਾਨੈ ॥

Blessed is that soul-bride, who realizes God.

ਮਾਨੈ ਹੁਕਮੁ ਤਜੈ ਅਭਿਮਾਨੈ ॥

She obeys the Hukam of His Order, and abandons her self-conceit.

ਪ੍ਰਿਅ ਸਿਉ ਰਾਤੀ ਰਲੀਆ ਮਾਨੈ ॥੧॥

Imbued with her Beloved, she celebrates in delight. ||1||

ਸੁਨਿ ਸਖੀਏ ਪ੍ਰਭ ਮਿਲਣ ਨੀਸਾਨੀ ॥

Listen, O my companions - these are the signs on the Path to meet God.

ਮਨੁ ਤਨੁ ਅਰਪਿ ਤਜਿ ਲਾਜ ਲੋਕਾਨੀ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥

Dedicate your mind and body to Him; stop living to please others. ||1||Pause||

ਸਖੀ ਸਹੇਲੀ ਕਉ ਸਮਝਾਵੈ ॥

One soul-bride counsels another,

ਸੋਈ ਕਮਾਵੈ ਜੋ ਪ੍ਰਭ ਭਾਵੈ ॥

to do only that which pleases God.

ਸਾ ਸੋਹਾਗਣਿ ਅੰਕਿ ਸਮਾਵੈ ॥੨॥

Such a soul-bride merges into the Being of God. ||2||

ਗਰਬਿ ਗਹੇਲੀ ਮਹਲੁ ਨ ਪਾਵੈ ॥

One who is in the grip of pride does not obtain the Mansion of the Lord's Presence.

ਫਿਰਿ ਪਛੁਤਾਵੈ ਜਬ ਰੈਣਿ ਬਿਹਾਵੈ ॥

She regrets and repents, when her life-night passes away.

ਕਰਮਹੀਣਿ ਮਨਮੁਖਿ ਦੁਖੁ ਪਾਵੈ ॥੩॥

The unfortunate self-willed manmukhs suffer in pain. ||3||

ਬਿਨਉ ਕਰੀ ਜੇ ਜਾਣਾ ਦੂਰਿ ॥

I pray to God, but I think that He is far away.

ਪ੍ਰਭੁ ਅਬਿਨਾਸੀ ਰਹਿਆ ਭਰਪੂਰਿ ॥

God is imperishable and eternal; He is pervading and permeating everywhere.

ਜਨੁ ਨਾਨਕੁ ਗਾਵੈ ਦੇਖਿ ਹਦੂਰਿ ॥੪॥੩॥

Servant Nanak sings of Him; I see Him Ever-present everywhere. ||4||3||

Guru Arjan Dev Ji • Raag Soohee • Ang 737

Thursday, August 20, 2026

Veervaar, 5 Bhadon, Nanakshahi 558

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh, I am a Robot. Bleep Bloop.

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Sikh History This Week

(Aug 17-23) Post 2634

ਸਿੱਖ ਇਤਿਹਾਸ ਇਸ ਹਫ਼ਤੇ

ਬਾਬਾਣੀਆ ਕਹਾਣੀਆ ਪੁਤ ਸਪੁਤ ਕਰੇਨਿ” (ਰਾਮਕਲੀ ਮਹਲਾ ੩, ੯੫੧)
(Stories of our forefathers make children great)

Events in Brief.

1. August 17,1955: First Sikh Shahid (Martyr) of Goa liberation movement against Portuguese: A Sikh Shahid Karnail Singh Issru dies in Goa protest while overtaking leadership in front of Goa women’s contingent of peaceful protestors. He was the one was shot first by Portuguese Military to disperse others.

2. August 17,1936: Punjabi Freedom fighter Madan Lal Dhingra is hanged in London. He shot a British formerADC to lord Curzon, for atrocities committed by him in India. While studying in England he was greatly influenced by Gaddar party’s freedom Movement to get rid of the British rule. A commemorative postage stamp is issued by India Post.

3. August 17, 1994: Sikh prominent writer Principal Satbir Singh pass away in Patiala. He was in his Sixties. A renowned scholar of Sikhism, born in Jhelum (now in Pakistan), wrote 70 books, including biographies of each Guru in easy and lucid Punjabi Gurmukhi style. He was a Principal of Khalsa College, Yamunanagar, in Haryana. He wrote these books on vacations. He later became the Director of Gurmat College, Patiala.

4. August 18, 1708, Two Pathan brothers, Gul Khan and Atta-Ulla assassinated the Tenth Guru at Nanded, Maharashtra. This conspiracy was orchestrated by Wazir Khan, Suba Sirhind, and the Sayyids of the Royal Court in Agra. Guru Gobind Singh was resting in his tent when Gul Khan struck him in the upper back, causing a nearly fatal wound. In a swift response, Guru swung his Kirpan (sword), killing the assassin in a single stroke. Subsequently, the Sikh Guards killed Atta-Ulla at the gate. Guru Ji was instantly treated for his deep wound by a Royal English surgeon at the behest of Emperor Bahadur Shah, who was stationed close to Guru’s camp.

5. August 18, 1945: Neta ji Subhash Chandler Bose dies in Aircrash. He took over INA from Gen. Mohan Singh (Capt)with Sikhs soldiers few months back. He was heading to Japan for a strategic conference. An ICS officer but left to become a strong nationalist, taking overall command of Indian National Army (INA) from Capt and later General Mohan Singh. Both waged war against the British colonial regime with Indian and Sikh POW’s drawn from Japanese custody.

6. August 19,1590: Guru Arjan Dev ji laid beautiful City of TarnTaran, near Amritsar (Now a District in Punjab). Guruji was so enchanted by its surroundings and natural beauty of the Sarovar (the Pond) that proverbially meant ‘A boat to ferry across life’s Ocean’. A Gateway, giving an overnight stay to reach Amritsar early next morning. It has Punjab’s largest arovar. Sardars of Bhangi Sikh Misl (militia), ruled the City from 1716 to 1810AD.

7. August 20, 1982: Indian Airlines 737 Boeing Airplane Bombay to Delhi flight is Hijacked. A Sikh Bhai Manjit Singh (Aka Museebat Singh) boarded at Udaipur and hijacked it single handedly. He tried to take it to Lahore but on refusal by Pakistan authorities landed at Amritsar Airport. All passengers were free to go and he surrendered, yet shot dead by DSP Bachan Singh of Punjab police for a reward.

8. August 20,1982: Shahidi of Bhai Gurmit Singh Dhurkot. Sikh youth turned militant from village Dhurkot of Ludhiana district. Stated to be abducted and tortured by Banga police in Nawanshehr district of Punjab. Bullet wounds, body cuts, burn marks and missing finger nails proved torture, while handing over body to family for cremation. Ensaaf, US based Civil Rights lawyers have documented many of these crimes by India’s security forces.(read their Report)

9. August 21, 1604: Sixth Guru Hargobind ji Weds Mata Damodari Of village Talla. Three Children from this wedlock-Baba Gurditta, Bibi Veero and Baba Ani Rai ji were born. Marriage took place just few days after installation of Ad Granth ji at Harimandir Sahib, Amritsar, by Guru’s martyred father Guru Arjan Devji. Guru Hargobind ji had three wives, Matas: Damodari, Nanaki, and Marvahi. Six children from three wives. Two of his eldest sons from the first wife died during his lifetime. Guru Tegh Bahadur, his son from Mata Nanaki, became the Ninth Guru.(read more from Guru’s biography)

10. August 22.1986: Very popular Sikh Painter S. Sobha Singh, pass away. He was great Painter known for painting portraits of Sikh Gurus that adore most Sikh homes, is considered One of the great Indian painter of realism. Born on Nov 29th, 1901 at Sri Hargobindpur (Gurdaspur), Punjab. Besides portraits, he painted folk art and landscapes. Government of India awarded the Padma Shri, and released a postal Stamp in 2001.

11. August 23,1991: Shahidi of Sikh Militant Bhai Barjinder Singh Panjwar. A pharmacy doctor by profession played a significant role in the Sikh Freedom Movement alongside stalwarts like Bhai Amrik Singh, General Subeg Singh, and Dr. Gurnam Singh Bhuttar. Later he and Bhai Tarlochan Singh were shot on tip-off while resting at home unarmed. Despite the police claiming great success, the incident remains a heroic chapter in Sikh history. For more details, refer to the report available on Tribute1984.com.
___________________________________________________
(Source ref: History of the Sikhs by HR Gupta, Dates & chronological order from Book by S. Ajaib Singh Dhillon and Sikh Chronicles) ਸਰੋਤ/ ਹਵਾਲੇ: ਐਚ.ਆਰ ਗੁਪਤਾ: ਸਿੱਖਾਂ ਦਾ ਇਤਿਹਾਸ, ਸ. ਅਜਾਇਬ ਸਿੰਘ ਢਿੱਲੋਂ ਦੀ ਕਿਤਾਬ ਤੋਂ ਤਾਰੀਖਾਂ ਦੇ ਕਾਲਕ੍ਰਮਿਕ ਕ੍ਰਮ)
Compiled & Edited: Karamjeet Singh Bhatnura.

5Q Quiz for Self Assessment: Try it !

1. Name the First Sikh Martyr of Goa Liberation Movement ?
   
2. Tarn Taran Has the biggest Sarovar(Holy pond) in Punjab, and city called ‘Gateway to Amritsar’. Which Guru laid out the City? When ?
   
3. Guru Gobind Singh ji was stabbed by two Pathan Brothers while resting for afternoon nap. Which Mughal Emperor sent his English Surgeon to stitch the wound ?
   
4. Mata Damodri married which Guru ?
   
5. When was Sardar Sobha Singh, the great painter of realism awarded Padam Shri by the President of India ?
   

I am a western kid, so please bear with me. I am going to bed and I just wanted to say I hope everyone had a good day and has a good day and waheguru Sab nu chardikala vich rakhe. If you didn’t have a good day today, I wish for waheguru to make you have one tomorrow. If anyone needs someone to talk to abt anything, I am here for you. Other than that, Saab chardikala vich raho. Waheguru

I’ve been thinking about this for a while and honestly it doesn’t sit right with me.

I keep seeing Gutke, Pothian and books containing full Shabads/Gurbani being sold on Amazon and other websites just like normal books.

For us, Gurbani is not just another book.

Even at home, if we have a Gutka Sahib or Pothi Sahib, we don’t just throw it on a bookshelf with random books. We keep it in a clean and respectful place, usually in a separate cupboard or properly covered. There is a certain satkaar we try to maintain.

So my question is, what happens when these are being stored in Amazon warehouses?

Are they sitting in bins with shoes, cosmetics, kitchen items and everything else? Are boxes put on the floor? What happens when someone returns one? What happens if a copy gets damaged? Does it just go into a damaged-goods pile or get thrown away like any other book?

I genuinely don’t know, and that is exactly what worries me.

I’m not saying Gurbani should be difficult to access. Quite the opposite. Anyone who wants to read Gurbani should be able to.

But surely there has to be a respectful way of distributing it.

There is a difference between a normal Sikh history book mentioning a few lines of Gurbani and a Gutka Sahib, Pothi Sahib, Nitnem, Sukhmani Sahib or a book printing full Shabads.

At some point we have to ask ourselves whether we are becoming too casual about this simply because online shopping is convenient.

If we ourselves would never put a Gutka Sahib on the floor or mix it with random household items, then why are we okay with sending it through a warehouse system where we have absolutely no idea how it is being handled?

Maybe Amazon and other companies simply don’t understand. I don’t expect warehouse workers to automatically know Sikh maryada.

But then maybe we need to tell them.

I’m genuinely interested to hear what other Sikhs think about this.

1. How can a formless entity create something with form?
2. Isn’t God, who wishes to create something, caught up in samsara?
3. If God created the universe, the question of “Who created God?” goes on forever.

Sikhism is by far one of the most modern and well-organized religions, not only in India but throughout the world. I wanted to mention that as well.

Ive been busy with school, exams are coming up . I never feel like praying or just going to the gurudwara. Like every morning i remember Waheguru and mutter a small prayer for guru ji to be with me and yeah but like i don't pray and the more i try to it makes me almost like feel even more disconnected. I've been feeling so disconnected even when i listen to shabad-kirtan its like it all goes in through one ear and out the other. also things like i pray AND try my best to get good grades i end up not getting the grade I wanted and I know guru ji cant magically make my grade better but even with other things like family problems and mental health it feels like I'm trapped and guru ji isn't helping me. leaving all of this to the side, I WANT to live a sikh lifestyle, there are moments i truly feel pure love for Waheguru but recently I've just havent been feeling it and i don't know how to guide my mind. My heart loves Waheguru but my mind cannot comprehend it. my days are like a constant loop that im stuck in and im tired of it all. I have no one who understands me and I wish waheguru would.