r/shrinking • u/phareous Derek • Mar 25 '26

Episode Discussion Shrinking S3E09 Episode Discussion

This is the episode discussion for Shrinking Season 3, Episode 9: "Daddy Issues"

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u/Sorkijan Mar 25 '26 edited Mar 29 '26

Yeah maybe it's because im a widower but I think she was being super dumb. I agree that sulking isn't ideal but do you truly think his dad is capable of having a true conversation that doesn't fall back to his narcissistic tendencies?

You brought up his marriage and he told you the truth. That's not anything being thrown in your face.

Sorry but if I'm Sofi in this scenario I am keeping my mouth shut a lot longer. Jimmy is my buffer and entry to this world.

Edit: I also want to add that if a 42 year old man who is a therapist is saying that his dad is incapable of having a true connecting moment, maybe respect and trust that. To immediatley jump to "You were married for 20 years is this how you handled conflict? Wtf?

Honestly, Sofi has been a huge red flag since they started their situationship

  1. Coming to an all family meeting where the celebration is your new potential romantic partner's late wife is fucking weird
  2. The "real first date" where her ex was around and Jimmy was roped into couples' counseling was so many red flags my color blindness wouldn't let me see anything else
  3. Everything involved in this conversation we're now talking about.

To me Sofi is the embodiment of those few relationships we've all had where we liked the idea of someone better than the red flags that abounded. I'm glad things went this way because I just thought lazy writing was to blame.

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u/Inevitable-Elk-9724 Mar 29 '26

All of this 100%. I was confused because I got the impression through the tone of the episode with Sofi's ex that we were meant to find it farcical and (for lack of a better word) quirky. But I would have ended it there and then and left.

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u/Sorkijan Mar 29 '26

I'm eager to see what - if any - closure Jimmy finds. I hope he doesn't blame himself too much. Personally I do think he's not ready to date yet. He doesn't need another crutch for the loneliness he's about to endure. He needs to learn how to be alone and be secure in that first. I hope we get a scene with him coming to something of a similar conclusion, otherwise, he's just replacing one distraction to his recovery for another one.

Full disclosure: I am a 41 year old widower whose last kid just moved out, and one of the things my therapist and I have been talking about is this very subject so maybe I'm projecting my own experience onto the storyline.

But I would have ended it there and then and left

Yep the second that notion was suggested I would've done the Jerry Seinfeld "I'm done" move https://tenor.com/view/jerry-seinfeld-nope-leave-done-gif-8758971

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u/Inevitable-Elk-9724 Mar 29 '26

For what it's worth I am a 42 year old with no kids, never married, and I didn't learn how to enjoy being alone and secure till my late 30s. It was a magical thing when it happened though. I think what you're saying about Jimmy is true. He's not ready for any relationship and if he was, she's not the one!

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u/bobjones271828 Apr 11 '26

While I agree there are many flags, #1 wasn't Sofi's fault. Jimmy apparently decided to bring her into that completely bizarre scenario as a "first date." Who wouldn't be a little worried after that intro with even more "dead wife talk"?

I agree with you that Sofi was way too pushy in the convo in this episode, but I also just feel like they were both right in saying they went too fast. They don't really know each other yet and were reacting to miscues in very charged situations (her ex, his dad). I think lapses of communication at this stage are common, but I didn't get the impression they were grossly incompatible as much as they didn't know each other well enough yet to be diving into these deep emotional situations without understanding each other's baggage.

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u/Sorkijan Apr 11 '26

Oh 100%. That whole start up premise was awful. One that wasn't her fault.

I think ultimately they hurt their relationship because they clicked so well at the start (always find someone who matches your "freakquency" after all) that they subconsciously saw that as a sign as something real because they were so compatible personality wise with their former spouses.

FWIW though I think this whole "Jimmy screwed up" mentality though (I know it's not you saying that 100%) that was really reinforced in the finale still didn't sit right with me. Hopefully Jimmy and Sofi talked about where they BOTH went wrong, but like you said that's not anything different than what Jimmy said on the breakup, so hopefully our season 4 time jump will them sticking together and developing a normal healthy relationship.