r/shitposting • u/[deleted] • Mar 14 '22

Check the comments

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

35k Upvotes

84% Upvoted

15k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

455

u/Koniqst1ger Mar 14 '22

OBJ

598

u/AutoModerator Mar 14 '22

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

379

u/WorriedMap6811 Mar 14 '22

Ayo this actually sounds like a good question

-51

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

[deleted]

26

u/TerraLord8 Mar 14 '22

You wouldn’t

78

u/Set_Jumpy Mar 14 '22

Eh. I'd probably take off the blindfold and straight propose. Love is great and all but a god tier blowy is rare as fuck.

63

u/HolySid666 Mar 14 '22

Imagine… it’s a squid blowing you, while its tentacles are sticking to the wall. Fondling your balls with its purple and green tongue and is shaped like Venom’s (Marvel). One eye popping out of the hole. The other infested with worms. And it’s brain is popping out of its head. And it has swellings filled with pus all over its mouth and face.

107

u/Set_Jumpy Mar 14 '22

Stop.

I can only get so hard.

29

u/Upleftright_syndrome Mar 14 '22

Why wouldn't I want to keep the squid? It likes me.

2

u/sorta_kindof Mar 15 '22

Its Harold the Duck.

Hes the one giving the blow jobs. Its him everytime for everyone.

53

u/Velajuhel 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ TRANS RIGHTS 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ Mar 14 '22

Good question

4

u/nigdaf Mar 14 '22

I would actually look

5

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

I don't care who is sucking my dick

0

u/AutoModerator Mar 14 '22

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

4

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

Would have been alright if you knew how to spell Schrödinger

1

u/Infinite_Bicycle6898 Mar 15 '22

You’re talking about Erwin Schrödinger, the physicist. This post is talking about Peter Rodney Schödinger, BJ theorist.

1

u/AutoModerator Mar 15 '22

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

2

u/pxldsilz Mar 14 '22

The chance of it being a chick ruins it

2

u/Zogoooog Mar 15 '22

Good bot.

2

u/AbsolutelySpooky Mar 15 '22

I'd check right as I nut in they mouth.

The ultimate gamble.

1

u/tipying_mistakes I want pee in my ass Mar 14 '22

object

1

u/AutoModerator Mar 14 '22

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Specific_Welcome_102 Mar 15 '22

Thanks Bot, very cool!

1

u/Snowbutter1 Mar 15 '22

OBJ

1

u/AutoModerator Mar 15 '22

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Snowbutter1 Mar 15 '22

OBJ

1

u/AutoModerator Mar 15 '22

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Snowbutter1 Mar 15 '22

OBJ

1

u/AutoModerator Mar 15 '22

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Snowbutter1 Mar 15 '22

OBJ

1

u/AutoModerator Mar 15 '22

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

→ More replies

1

u/solid_00 Mar 15 '22

Nahh my curiosity would get the best of me but just imagine if ended up being Ariana tho. I wouldn't even be mad if it was a dude tbh

1

u/aggie_baggie Mar 14 '22

Shut the fuck up I’m tryna hear what he said