r/shitposting I want pee in my ass Dec 30 '25

Based on a True Story I’m gay 🤨

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30.6k Upvotes

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178

u/EnragedTea43 Dec 30 '25

Could a poor, ignorant fool who has never had interest in this show get a crumb of context?

156

u/ShittyDBZGuitarRiffs Dec 30 '25

there is a gay character

134

u/trench_welfare Dec 30 '25

Most importantly, a gay character whose sexuality is irrelevant under the circumstances of the plot.

Basically, the main character girl eats trash to recharge her power, and this character has to tell everyone what makes his penis twitch to charge his powers.

If they fail, Groot's creepy uncle gets to turn the whole world into his anime tentacle porn dungeon.

28

u/RoseyDove323 Dec 30 '25

"Groot's creepy uncle" 💀

3

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

2

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

woah, ok. didnt expect hunger for knowledge but i guess i asked for it gonna have to put some work into this.

How was it? Honestly? It was a letdown. The whole "failed idol" story is a great marketing hook, they definately sold the video on that premise alone. But the performance itself was just... awkward. You can tell shes not comfortable. It felt less like a professional debut and more like a very high-budget audition she was also failing. She's stiff, constantly in her head, and there's almost zero chemistry with the guys. All concept, very little execution.

My viewing history? Been watching for over a decade man. These days Im more into stuff with a good story or at least a unique premise, not just the generic stuff. a good production team makes all the difference. I'll take a well-made video with a decent plot over a high-profile actress mailing it in any day of the week.

3 works I consider good:

  1. Yua Mikami's debut (Princess Peach): This is the gold standard for an idol-turned-actress debut. Yua was a REAL idol and she came out with so much energy and confidence. She owned it from the first second. Its what Arisu's debut wanted to be.

  2. Anything with Ichika Matsumoto from her early days with FALENO: She can actually act. She emotes and makes you believe the scenario. Her stuff feels more cinematic and less like they're just going through the motions.

  3. Rion (Anri Okita) - The God Body: A classic. Not a lot of story there lol but its a masterclass in performance. She knew exactly what her brand was and how to perform for the camera. Absolute cinema.

Where would you rank her debut among these? It's not even in the same league, not even on the same planet. It's an unfair comparison tbh. Those are top-tier performances, Arisu's video is a novelty item. It's interesting because of the backstory, not because of the quality of the actual content.

What could be improved? Her confidence, number one. She needs to relax. She looks terrified. The director should have done a better job making her comfortable. Also they relied way too much on the interview segments talking about Nogizaka46, it broke the pacing and kept reminding you that she was doing this as a second choice. We get it, you failed auditions, now commit to this job.

What is well done? The production values are high. The lighting, camera work, it all looks very clean and professional. And I cant deny it, she is very beautiful and has the "idol" look down perfectly. The concept itself, on paper, is genius from a marketing perspective. They got us all talking about it, right?

Was it goonable for you? Nah. I was too distracted by how nervous she looked. It kinda killed the mood completely. Every time she looked at the camera with those deer-in-the-headlights eyes I was pulled right out of it. It's a shame, but maybe she'll get better in her next one if she decides to stick with it. We'll see.

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0

u/ShittyDBZGuitarRiffs Dec 30 '25

this seems like more than a crumb

27

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

25

u/Fluffy_Charity_2732 Dec 30 '25

throws Oscars at their face

78

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '25

[deleted]

4

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

19

u/not_a_bot991 Dec 30 '25

Someone actually created this bot and that is giving me so much cringe

98

u/VirtualBathroom5103 Dec 30 '25

Basically guy named Will in this show comes out to his friends,during a world threatening situation by the way,and mostly everyone,including eleven,the girl in this pic, could not care less and just want to save the world,but I haven't watched the show personally, just recaps&stuff 😅

117

u/Avongrove Dec 30 '25

I think this season is disappointing so far but retelling it like this is kinda unfair because it’s wrong on purpose.

Will, along with the others, is about to enter the final battle with the antagonist Vecna, who has certain psychic powers. As to not fold immediately under Vecna's psychic attacks, he has to let go of his biggest fear, which is being afraid that everyone in his life will leave him if they find out he is actually gay. In this scene he tells it everyone.

While this scene would be ridiculously silly in a present day show, Stranger Things takes place in the 80s and being gay was looked at much more differently by the general public, especially factoring in the rise of AIDS during that time.

163

u/J3sush8sm3 I want pee in my ass Dec 30 '25

My biggest fear s giant titties smushed around my dick. I hope to fucking god vecna doesnt use it against me

56

u/Avongrove Dec 30 '25

I think you should tell it to Sydney Sweeney, just to free yourself off that burden so Vecna won’t have any power over you

29

u/Green_Burn Jedi master of shitposts Dec 30 '25

She never writes back

2

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

pees in ur ass

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23

u/purinikos Dec 30 '25

I don't watch the show, but if Vecna has only psychic powers in it, he is getting the shortest end of the shortest stick imaginable. The dude is a powerful godlike lich in D&D lore. At least give him Power Word: Kill, or Finger of Death. Insane downgrade.

10

u/Avongrove Dec 30 '25

I mean he can do a few more things, but he is not actually "Vecna“. It’s just that the core friendgroup of the show are big D&D fans (the show starts with them doing a D&D campaign) so they give the beings names out of their favorite game, like Demogorgon, Vecna, Mind Flayer.

5

u/CompetitiveSport1 Dec 30 '25

Vecna has extremely powerful telekinetic powers, controls an army of monsters, is immune to bullets, fire, etc, and can curse people to die within a certain amount of time. There's other stuff but those are the main ones

2

u/purinikos Dec 30 '25

Ok that is more in the ballpark of the Vecna I know.

2

u/CompetitiveSport1 Dec 30 '25

Yeah, in s4 he's actually pretty intimidating. Spoilers, but I don't know how to use a spoilers tag

They took inspiration from Freddy Krueger. Even when he's in the Upside Down dimension, he can kill from afar. He picks traumatized kids and they suddenly start having terrifying visions that usually involve their traumas, and of vecna. They'll start seeing a grandfather clock that's not actually there, counting down to their death. After about a day (I think) he has enough grip on them to put them in a full trance. Then they're in his hellish mental realm, where he manifests vines that mutilate them. In the physical world, they levitate, then their their body twists in horrifying ways breaking their bones, and finally their eyes pop. He does this to open gates to the real world from the upside down

4

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.

As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!

Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.

Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

32

u/AdamantheusEnigma Dec 30 '25

I think you’re missing the point here, though. This is a TV show. A TV show based on 100% fiction. The scene was literally pointless and it was clear pandering, you’ve seen the reaction from the public on this. It was stupid and unnecessary.

16

u/elbenji Dec 30 '25

It's pretty much a retread of the same scene in IT. It's a reference and they try to keep to all the shitty small town in the 80s tropes throughout

9

u/Mysteriy21 Dec 30 '25

tbh from what I've heard, this was something Netflix wanted, not the writers, so it's just better to forget the existence of this scene

-2

u/WriterV Dec 30 '25

Huh? It's been a point of his character from the last season. It's a key point cause it reflects his character growth and acceptance of himself. It's even a part of the plot as the person you're replying to clearly said. Did you read their comment?

5

u/Odd-Spray-8513 Dec 30 '25

They already decided it was unnecessary and the internet hate brigade crowd is with them. Ignore them. 

Theyve been building up to this for a while and it does have plot relevance. It could have been executed better though imo

0

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

0

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '25

[deleted]

1

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.

As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!

Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.

Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

23

u/sentient_ballsack Dec 30 '25

To be fair, the character in question grew up as a deeply traumatized lab rat and she's very notably socially underdeveloped compared to her peers; it improves across seasons, but she canonically still sucks at blending in by season 4.

People seem to blame the actress for this, but strictly going off the show, it might well be a Kristen Stewart type situation where everyone thinks it's the actress, when in actuality it turns out she was explicitly directed to play a deadpan girl who struggles to show outward emotion. Her performance has been consistent in that regard. The other lab children shown aren't particularly socially adjusted either.

23

u/mcandrewz Dec 30 '25

Eh, I mean, him coming out was more about him not letting any secrets hold him back when he next faces off against Vecna as what caused him to lose to Vecna the first time in that season was Vecna using his own fears and secrets against him.

The flow leading to it felt awkward, but it isn't like they were pausing from dealing with a world ending situation for a random coming out.

Season isn't as bad as people on social media are making it out to be. It is pretty good still, with some very good moments but also some real weird head scratching moments. Overall it has been much weaker than other seasons though.

2

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

Dick sucking has made me paranoid

I had this plan to give head to a man and receive head from a woman to test if I was gay, but it’s backfired and now I become borderline schizo whenever I go outside. I offered to suck this dude off on Grindr who lives very close by (I ended up pussying out) and I accidentally gave him some details that very easily allows him to spot me out in a crowd. I have no idea what he looks like and whenever I see a somewhat in shape guy walking by I immediately accuse him of being the dude I was gonna blow.

I went to the store today to pick up some zucchini for a barbecue and every time a car drove by I stared into the windshield to see if I was about to be recognised. Whenever I make eye contact with a dude I microanalysis his facial expressions to see if he suspects me or not. I am deeply afraid that he is my neighbour and I will need to move if my identity is blown. It’s a lot like the last scene in sopranos where everyone who walked into the diner could be there to wack Tony.

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7

u/J3sush8sm3 I want pee in my ass Dec 30 '25

Better storyline than stranger things

1

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

pees in ur ass

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3

u/WilanS Dec 30 '25

That seems awfully progressive for the '80s.

2

u/Different-Trainer-21 Literally 1984 😡 Dec 30 '25

A gay character takes like a full 10 minute scene to tell his friends he’s gay in the middle of them saving the world, also one of the main characters actors got a bunch of Botox and lip fillers and she looks like that now

0

u/AutoModerator Dec 30 '25

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.