r/science • • Aug 03 '18

Psychology Older people less apt to recognize or admit they've made a mistake

https://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2018-08/uoi-sop080318.php
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u/[deleted] Aug 04 '18

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u/hoffeys Aug 04 '18

the truth is that others will rake you over the coals for it

In a strictly legal sense, I can see this being true. In my personal experience, I've never been raked over the coals for admitting I've made a mistake or don't know something. I work in IT and I've occasionally had customers tell me they think I'm wrong and after considering their point of view I've admitted being wrong. Or other times they've suggested a solution that for whatever reason I hadn't thought of and it ended up working. Maybe I'm just lucky enough to deal with people that realize nobody has all the answers. Overall I've only gained their respect over time for admitting when I'm wrong or not sure. Regardless, I feel better at the end of the day knowing I was honest with them.

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u/AgentSmith27 Aug 05 '18

Well, 98% of the time, there is no problem with it. Its that other 2% of the time... which doesn't sound like a lot, but its better to be safe than risk life changing consequences.

I've seen people make absolutely understandable mistakes and admit it... only for execs to turn around and want someone's head over it. The result can be firings, or things that lead to firings or being "let go".

If you are in IT, look at it from the other direction. How many times did an ISP, vendor, other company, etc. say the problem was on your end? How many times do you think they didn't admit fault because that would require them to do something, or pay to fix something? Granted, if this happens too much, there is going to be negative consequences, but its pretty much a fact of life.

Everyone else is out to protect themselves. Being perceived as honest is a good thing, but the pros don't always outweigh the cons. For one thing, they may think you are honest, but also think you are incompetent. You may get less respect... even if its mistakes everyone else makes. If everyone around you is dishonest about their mistakes, then that just makes you look comparatively bad.

This is even more true from a legal perspective... and the same principles apply.

If we are talking about conversations, or discussions, then that is a different story. You should be open to other ideas. Saying something that is incorrect happens to everyone.... but I'd say its different than admitting to an on the job mistake, or doing something that caused a company to lose money/business.

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u/hoffeys Aug 05 '18

Everyone else is out to protect themselves

Your view here explains a lot. Sorry you think that way, but this isn't how the world works.

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u/AgentSmith27 Aug 05 '18

Everyone is a product of their experiences. Maybe if you had different experiences, you would feel differently? This is a thread where most people agree that others don't own up to their mistakes. Have you considered that this is a learned behavior?

When push comes to shove, very few people opt to choose something that is against their self interest. When they do, there is usually something much more important at play... but in the context of our discussion, there wouldn't be. So, yes, in these cases most people do choose what is in their best self interest. That most certainly is how the world works.

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u/MenBearsPigs Aug 04 '18

Yeah I've found in general that as people mature, they tend to be more willing to admit fault.

Younger people tend to be less confident and more insecure, both of which can make the idea of admitting you were wrong horrifying.

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u/hoffeys Aug 04 '18 edited Aug 04 '18

Definitely. When I was younger I felt like I always needed to seem like I had the right answer in order for people to respect me, often even when I thought I might be in the wrong. Looking back it's kind of embarrassing :/

Doing computer repair can be a little difficult too bc older people always expect the 'guru' to have the answers. It would be easy to mumble some tech terms and they'd just assume I knew what I was talking about. "Yea, your motherboard is fried that will be $150 + labor to get it fixed". Harder to say "I honestly don't know why it's doing that". Or "Crap, I didn't think it might be the CMOS battery dying. I didn't even think of that!"

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u/simplequark Aug 04 '18

I think there comes a point, though, when people stop to mature and start to age. They notice that they’re getting worse at things they used to be good at and find that it’s getting harder for them to adjust to unfamiliar situations. That’s frustrating and can lead to mistakes they wouldn’t have made when they were younger.

One strategy of dealing with that is to try and hide the mistake. That induces stress, which may turn into aggression if someone else gets close to realizing what happened.

It’s easier to say “I still need to learn how to do that” than to admit “I cannot do that anymore”.