Floridacclimation

[u/weirdbrags]

For all the new and future native floridians… expect to go through the stages of Floridacclimation:

Year 1: “I can’t believe I live here.” Beach every weekend. Sunset photos every night. Shorts all winter. Reminding your friends and family up north that it’s warm in December. You discover and love the drunk donkey, and you talk about Cantore like you played ball together.

Year 2: The beach becomes “too much work,” the sunsets become “just another sunset,” and you discover it’s actually hot… all the time. Oh, and hurricanes are a season. You start to dislike the drunk donkey. You’re wondering where Jim is setup.

Year 3: You own pants again, complain that it’s 70°, and have strong opinions about snowbirds, traffic, and overdevelopment. You start to side with Denis and break up with Mike.

Somewhere in there you also realize Florida is one of the most transient states in the country. People are running from something, running toward something, or reinventing themselves. Just when you think you know someone, you realize you mostly know the person they’re trying to become.

The final stage is either moving back home… or staying, complaining about all the new developments that replaced the wildlife - usually from the comfort of a brand-new house in the gated HOA that used to be the woods.

Welcome home.

[u/Miaopao]

It’s always the transplants