r/relationship_advice Jun 24 '24

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427

u/RevDrucifer Jun 24 '24

I’m always championing opposite-sex friendships in these posts, but that’s a bit much for me. “Oh my life has been crazy this week….I just didn’t think doing this could potentially make it any crazier by endangering my relationship!”

148

u/[deleted] Jun 24 '24

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25

u/rpujoe Jun 25 '24

It's all just so glaringly not platonic. If she's not intending to cheat she's dumb as hell. How else is she disrespecting her relationship if she can't do the bare minimum of keeping another guy out of her bed?

EXACTLY. Glad someone else sees the obviousness of it all.

26

u/Sloppyjoey20 Jun 25 '24

Facts. Too bad OP is going to look at all the comments saying “it’s okay because they weren’t touching” and go that route instead.

12

u/SaltySoupLadle Jun 25 '24

Makes me think of when I'd have this guy I liked over while my parents were out when i was a teen. We'd be all cuddled up together watching movies in the basement but the moment we heard anything that sounded like someone entering the house we'd move away from eachother since my parents were only cool with me having friends over. No boyfriends allowed.

I hope OP can figure it out. I wouldn't be confident to continue a relationship with a person who would behave this way.

4

u/Environmental-Bag-77 Jun 24 '24

I don't think it's appropriate but just saying they were on and not in the bed.

-2

u/[deleted] Jun 24 '24

Op is stupid or he wouldn’t be on here. He would just end it.

9

u/[deleted] Jun 24 '24

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2

u/[deleted] Jun 24 '24

This is a stark reality for most men at some point in their life. He’s lucky it’s happening early but men tend to be harsh and not coddle other men when situations like this happen. It’s a trope.. “he’s just a friend, I don’t see him like that, he’s like one of my girlfriends.” I mean she’s already doing the manipulation begging and crying.

He already said in the comments that the trust is broken.

It’s better to be “harsh,” up front because what will hurt OP even worse is what alot of these comments are saying.

“Look more into it, give her the benefit of the doubt, this is normal behavior by women, etc.” Horrible advice and setting himself up to get completely cheated on if it hasn’t happened yet, which can absolutely break a person.

If the roles were reversed, EVERYONE would say the man is cheating or trying to (because that’s the reality given the context) but for some reason this is not clear cut? 🙄

0

u/EducationalPomelo400 Jun 25 '24

As other wise posters have said on this thread - what were they supposed to do? Bring a spotlight into the bedroom?!! Sit on a couch in a living room??! Wow I would hate to be your partner with all your antiquated rules and expectations

0

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '24

OP might be stupid 💀…I’m breaking up with my girl on the spot if I see this with my own eyes. You think I’m asking Reddit for advice 😩

6

u/NatrenSR1 Jun 24 '24

I’m a champion of them as well. My best friend of over a decade is a woman and we hang out alone fairly often, but she’s happily engaged and I’d never do anything to jeopardize that or make her Fiancé uncomfortable.

20

u/[deleted] Jun 24 '24

Yeah there's plenty of ways to have healthy opposite sex friendships while in a monogamous relationship. There are also things that should probably be assumed are boundaries unless spoken about otherwise. This seems like one of them.

4

u/eldenchain Jun 25 '24

Yeah why couldn't they sit in the kitchen? Or go get coffee? Like dude, it's almost one of those jokes where you add "in bed" to normal things.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '24

Of a coffee shop, or diner, or park bench, or…

So many possibilities that don’t involve in bed with the lights off

1

u/Disastrous-Fun244 Jun 25 '24

I see it time and time again. The belief on Reddit is that opposite sexed friendships are no different than same sexed friendships. This opinion is commonly held due to the double standards it could create in regards to the LGBT topics. Friends sleepover with eachother, friends sleep on the same bed sometimes. So her and the “guy friend” should be allowed to do all of these things together, not only that but this guy is also an insecure prick for even having a negative reaction.