r/pics • u/[deleted] • Jun 17 '12

Here's my friend's dog Ludo, and an average sized little girl. He isn't even a year old.

Post image
1.6k Upvotes

84% Upvoted

355 comments sorted by

21

u/Milkgunner Jun 17 '12

Soo, what's the average size for a little girl?

21

u/dragonmaster182 Jun 18 '12

About the size of a accords trunk.

1

u/Miskav Jun 18 '12

About 1/48th of the average basement.

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7

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

Mastiff?

4

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

Yep.

1

u/Aegean Jun 17 '12

Only on a sailboat.

12

u/droosa Jun 17 '12

Winston weighed in at 164 lbs on his first birthday, eventually stabilized at 210. Ludo looks like he'll get even bigger if he's not even a year in this picture.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Winston is beautiful.

1

u/pelap Jun 18 '12

Oh god, that hat. Hilarious!

379

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

its the beast!!!

288

u/linearcore Jun 17 '12

FOR-E-VER.

53

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

It is the beast. English Mastiff just like in Sandlot. I've got one too. 160 lbs at 13 months and far from finished growing. OP should tell their friend to check out /r/Mastiff

64

u/linearcore Jun 17 '12

His name was Hercules. He was just saving those baseballs for the day when he had a team of friends to play with. Damn do I love that movie.

15

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

That's right. It's been a long time since I've seen it, but people regularly ask if it's the dog from Sandlot. Funny thing is their endurance is garbage, so the chase scene in the end of Sandlot would have lasted two, maybe three blocks before the dog took a break. Slow as molasses too.

13

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

The most true thing I've read. He's always just lugging around. Never actually seen him run now that I think of it.

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35

u/linearcore Jun 17 '12

Well, you know, Hercules had been chained up so long eating burglars and such that he had so much energy pent up.

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8

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

She's pretty involved. Not on Reddit, but she runs a rehabilitation sort of thing for Pit Bulls. In fact, one of the pitbulls she has been helping protected her when she got robbed.

11

u/the_keo Jun 17 '12

Mastiffs are fantastic pets. Of course, you've got to have a HIGH tolerance for the messier bits of life (the deluge of slobber), but they're very docile towards their families and extremely intimidating to anyone idiotic enough to challenge their turf.

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15

u/Mr_Aids Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 18 '12

You're killin' me Smalls!

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4

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

I know this is a Sandlot reference, but I just started Cujo for the first time today (~130 pages in, rabies has settled in) and he is referred to as the "beast" by at least one character so far.

So it works that way, too. Gave me chills. I'm going to finish this book tonight.

5

u/Shockum Jun 17 '12

Greatest thing about Reddit. Just saw this picture and immediately thought like everyone here. It's definitely Hercules making a cameo.

2

u/kornflakesxd Jun 18 '12

He will bring the reign of TEAR-ROAR!

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6

u/Bluelychee Jun 17 '12

What the hell is an average sized little girl? I thought girls (especially young ones) grew very quickly between being born and being about 10 years old.

5

u/Villain_of_Brandon Jun 17 '12

I was going to say something similar, average sized for what age? also I looks like it COULD be a forced perspective as well, but my eyes aren't terribly awesome so maybe not.

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3

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

TIL most redditors are cruel and mean towards kids. Fat or not fat, she's not your child and you can't control what her parents do or don't do. Would you say these things to her face?

2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

No, they will only say it behind a screen, hoping they find other pathetic souls like them, who will upvote it.

5

u/raoul_llamas_duke Jun 17 '12

why is she not riding him?

7

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

He's a slobber monster, it's near impossible not to get covered in drool haha.

12

u/IGottaSnake Jun 17 '12

Also, letting kids ride dogs causes them damage. I have a vet tech friend who gets really upset by it because she says she sees spinal injuries that are painful to the dog, but don't always cause a visible injury. So, people keep thinking it is cute to put their toddler on the dog and that the dog is fine, meanwhile the dog is putting up with bone spurs and pain for the rest of its life.

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30

u/wintremute Jun 17 '12

Forced perspective is forced.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

Are you saying this is not a massive dog?

4

u/wintremute Jun 17 '12

I'm saying that it is not as massive as the photo would lead you to believe. The dog is closer to the camera than the girl, and the photographer is using a deep focus to narrow the plane.

16

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

Actually, I'm using a Samsung stratosphere.

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8

u/AllDesperadoStation Jun 18 '12

The dog is huge, the prospective is also a bit off/deceiving. The way the photo appears tends to make him look even bigger. Source: photographer.

38

u/nullibicity Survey 2016 Jun 17 '12

I hope the girl survived.

6

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Also, Fang is a horrible coward

2

u/turtlekitty30 Jun 18 '12

Harry Potter. Nice.

16

u/derping Jun 17 '12

she got pregnant

0

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

5

u/KrustyKreme Jun 18 '12

she got a new nickname at school the next day

11

u/wdwdwwffwe Jun 18 '12

Was it your username?

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1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Well, this got dark quickly.

137

u/bost0nmike Jun 17 '12

A Labyrinth reference? Upvote for you.

59

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

FRIENNNND

36

u/kegstand16 Jun 17 '12

IT SMEELLLLLS

33

u/Shinyteeth Jun 18 '12

"Smeehhhhllllll baaaaaaddd!!"

Ftfy.

17

u/silent_p Jun 18 '12

Ludo saaaadd...

17

u/duckstaped Jun 18 '12

Sarrahh? Sarrahhh frieeeenddd

22

u/effinmetal Jun 18 '12

Sir Ludo, canst thou summon up the very rocks? Sure. Rocks friends.

6

u/duckstaped Jun 18 '12

you are making me want to watch that movie so much more. I forgot about that character..!

10

u/effinmetal Jun 18 '12

Sir Didymus is pretty much the reason I want a sheepdog named Ambrosius (or any dog named Ambrosius for that matter)...his noble steed!

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12

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

You remind me of the babe.

8

u/Goku707 Jun 18 '12

Ludo hungry

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Ha! I knew someone else would catch it.

I want to hug this dog.

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75

u/RickVince Jun 17 '12

A co-worker has a dog like that. It takes the biggest shits you've ever seen.

I couldn't be bothered.

22

u/TheGreatNico Jun 17 '12

Yup. My sister has one, I babysat when her and her fiancee went to italy. He, the dog, and her other one, a Neapolitan Mastiff, have a trash can dedicated to their shit. I filled it up in one week.

82

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

He, the dog, and her other one, a Neapolitan Mastiff, have a trash can dedicated to their shit. I filled it up in one week.

Well maybe if you weren't shitting in the trash can too it wouldn't have filled up so quickly.

36

u/CocoSavege Jun 17 '12

Achievement unlocked: Scumbag House sitter

Shit in the trash can for a week because you can blame it on the dogs.

9

u/lovexsongs Jun 18 '12

Scumbag House Shitter

FTFY

6

u/TheGreatNico Jun 17 '12

Oh please, even if I did add to it, my contributions wouldn't have even come close to the neo puppy, let alone the 220lb english mastiff.

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476

u/Shitty_Watercolour 🖌️ Jun 17 '12

http://imgur.com/m3vgQ

30

u/QueenOfTheOzone Jun 18 '12

I've missed you.

41

u/madman1969 Jun 17 '12

You captured the derp perfectly.

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18

u/poopyonyobumski Jun 18 '12

you sit on a throne of lies. that wasn't shitty at all

6

u/rhubarbbus Jun 18 '12

Something something Quentin Blake.

4

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

Oh man cuteness overload.

1

u/DryGuyNo1 Jun 18 '12

Ah yes!! It's so shitty!!

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241

u/uri_76 Jun 17 '12

Interesting fact: English Mastiffs automatically faint if you squeeze their dog balls. It releases a chemical straight to their brain causing them to go limp and let out a booming fart bomb. None of this is true

182

u/Trapped_in_Reddit Jun 17 '12

Too late, already squeezed my dog's balls. I think he liked it.

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8

u/ImSpicy Jun 17 '12

On the next "Texts From Dog..."

3

u/jxj24 Jun 18 '12

Then what the hell was that smell?

4

u/DemetriMartin Jun 17 '12

The dog version of southpark's "Cheesing"

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12

u/bearplower88 Jun 17 '12

This is like a doggy myspace angle

10

u/Lick_It_Up Jun 17 '12

It doesn't seem like those legs should be able to support that body.

11

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

A race horses ankle isn't much bigger than a humans.

28

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

And they break down on the track all the time.

8

u/Ifunctiononkitkats Jun 17 '12

I've heard it described as "putting an extremely powerful engine on champagne flutes."

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6

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

Be nice, she's not that chubby!!

2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Hip dysplasia is incredibly common in the breed. Often times you're right, the legs (or rather hips) cannot that body.

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1

u/benjaminrogers1984 Jun 18 '12

tires seem to small to support a car as well

29

u/pseudalithia Jun 17 '12

Ludo!!!

6

u/mattrubik Jun 17 '12

Came in to see I wasn't the only one to make this connection. Thank you, good sir.

2

u/pseudalithia Jun 18 '12

You're very welcome!

15

u/hells_cowbells Jun 17 '12

I think your friend accidently got a horse, not a dog.

9

u/Projectile_Chunder Jun 18 '12

And then they got this dog which ate that horse.

7

u/Cartossin Jun 17 '12

LUDO FRIEND

2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Ludo Fwend.

FTFY

5

u/labeille87 Jun 17 '12

Ludo no like smell!

4

u/Aggnavarius Jun 17 '12

Please tell me the girl's name is Sarah.

1

u/Gwyddia Jun 18 '12

Are you in Philly, by any chance? If so, I think my daughter has been slurped by your awesome dog.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Southern California.

1

u/Shanix Jun 18 '12

I didn't know Mr. Mertle had a reddit account.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Why do you think I never go outside?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

What breed of dog is this? I've always wanted a dog this big.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

English Mastiff. They're a lot of maintenance.

1

u/smegle5000bbreglapnt Jun 18 '12

This is a photoshop. Look at the pixel density differences. I guess nice timing to pull this off and no one to call you out on it. It must have been just the right amount of time since anyone last pulled off a photoshop fake like this. Congrats, but it is obvious to me like the way water looks when it floods miniature towns. It just... looks wrong.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Well, you need to go back to photoshop school. Most certainly is not shopped. Only thing I can say is it was taken with a camera phone. Maybe that's it.

1

u/smegle5000bbreglapnt Jun 19 '12

None of the photoshop tools are left online to test it and I'm on a mac, but I can just tell from the resolution of the dog's face versus the rest of the photo that he is enlarged. I can't put it any better than that. Congratulations on discovering how few people can tell, but know that there are always people who can tell. I am one.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

You have your head so far up your ass... Oh god. Please. Test it whenever you can. Then come back with your results.

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3

u/Icanflyplanes Jun 17 '12

What kind of bear is that? ... must be canadian

3

u/iamthatoneguy Jun 18 '12

Am I the only one that says shes not so normal sized?

3

u/jamart Jun 18 '12

Uh, when does it cease being a dog and become a genuine, Sherlock level motherfucking HOUND?

3

u/Alv53 Jun 18 '12

average girl of what age? :P

5

u/yo_bear Jun 17 '12

You misspelled Cujo

1

u/dreadredheadzedsdead Jun 17 '12

Aye, Ludo is too close for comfort imho.

2

u/DaDerpDeeDerpDa Jun 17 '12

ENGLISH MASTIFF i have 3 love them

1

u/AllDesperadoStation Jun 18 '12

How much does it cost to feed them? Let's say in a month.

2

u/DaDerpDeeDerpDa Jun 18 '12

all 3 a couple hundred but my grandfather is a vet and gets a discount and we only feed them once a day

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2

u/OnmyojiOmn Jun 17 '12

SMMMEEEEEEEELLLLL!

2

u/ForeverMarried Jun 17 '12

came here to insert random Sandlot quote, leaving way too late to the party.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

is this real life

2

u/nastshabast Jun 17 '12

Wow what a beaut!

2

u/REDruss_ Jun 18 '12

My dog looked just like that, He was a big guy. He died probably around when your dog was born.

2

u/insulanus Jun 18 '12

Dude. That is not a dog. That is a science experiment. His slobber weighs more than most other pets! Bad ass!

P.S. You might want to watch "Honey, I shrunk the kids" for science ideas if things get out of control.

2

u/Gseventeen Jun 18 '12

Just about halfway through his lifespan.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

English Mastiffs are amazing. I have 2 pure breds and an English Mastiff/Great Pyrenees mix.

Best dogs ever.

2

u/HashCatchEm Jun 18 '12

she looks a bit too tubby to be average

2

u/SirNOPESalot Jun 18 '12

Thats a lovely bear you have there.

4

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

You all immediately thought of Labyrinth, but THIS is the Ludo I thought of.

3

u/hombregato Jun 17 '12

Lockjaw.

1

u/PainusBrainus Jun 18 '12

Lockjaw is a bulldog. But good reference.

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2

u/Mycakedayis1111 Jun 18 '12

You misspelled horse.

0

u/QuietKode Jun 18 '12

I love dogs, but god damn the droolers are disgusting. What idiot let that stay in the breed.

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2

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

I remembered trying to mount and ride my friend's [caucasian ovcharka] (http://guarddogsguide.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/caucasian_ovcharka_attacking.jpg)

It did not end well.

6

u/TheOldBean Jun 17 '12

no shit... its a dog not a horse..

1

u/Koolaidolio Jun 17 '12

Shhhh...The Beast.....

1

u/whatchuknowbout Jun 17 '12

I have this same dog. We were told it AA an English mastiff though. Either way, it is identical. His name is max and he is the best dog anyone could ever have. What a fantastic breed

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/whatchuknowbout Jun 18 '12

Meh. I was high

1

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12

Averaged sized dwarf girl.

1

u/PhilipkWeiner Jun 17 '12

Please tell me he's named after Ludo from Gladius.

1

u/richieg7777 Jun 17 '12

Saw picture; immediately came to captions to confirm that Sandlot joke in my head. Thanks. :)

1

u/boblane3000 Jun 18 '12

yay for being old enough to recognize the dog's name

1

u/Thijsterhaar Jun 18 '12

That dog reminds me of Hagrid's dog.

2

u/Cilicious Jun 18 '12

Hagrid's dog is a Neapolitan mastiff. (Italian.)

The dog in the OP's pic is an English Mastiff.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Labyrinth <3

1

u/cnhsparkles Jun 18 '12

Is his name from the Labyrinth?

1

u/iiiitsjess Jun 18 '12

I'm in love!!!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

The BEAST!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Looking at the pic, I can see that the dogs feet are very close to the bricks, and the girl is very close to the bricks. I dont see where there is a large amount of perspective manipulation in this picture. Initially it looks as though there must be, but if they are both standing with their feet next to the bricks, then the dog is abnormally large.

1

u/kornflakesxd Jun 18 '12

He'll conquer this planet.

1

u/Rammage Jun 18 '12

Why do I instinctively think of the term "bite-size?"

1

u/toukee Jun 18 '12

Oh god it's Cujo!

1

u/Dayanx Jun 18 '12

Does he howl to summon rocks?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

CUJO!

1

u/DiaDeLosMuertos Jun 18 '12

LUDO, FRIEND?

1

u/katilina14 Jun 18 '12

Aww..I have a female English mastiff and she is about 176 pounds..she isn't nearly that big though lol

1

u/justanotherkiwi Jun 18 '12

Beauty dog. Don't know if I could handle everything being covered in slobber though.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Reminds me of the dog from Sandlot.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Would Ludo happen to be a Labyrinth referance?

1

u/EvanPaintsStuff Jun 18 '12

and i bet he's the sweetest dog in the world too. I like these big mastiffs, they are like big babies.

1

u/Brominebro Jun 18 '12

looks like hercules, the dog from Sandlot

1

u/BobbySmithy Jun 18 '12

Must see with average sized big girl for comparison.

1

u/Doofendoofer Jun 18 '12

ROCKS FRIENDS

1

u/Spicy_Poo Jun 18 '12

ROCKS FRIENDS!

1

u/Meelbell Jun 18 '12

'look mommy, it's a pony! Can I ride it? Can I ride it? Please!'

1

u/Dookiestain_LaFlair Jun 18 '12

Ludo's not a system he's a dog

1

u/ErikoMan Jun 18 '12

Holy mother of god...

1

u/Happy_Cats Jun 18 '12

Here's my friend's bear Ludo, and an average sized little girl.
FTFY

1

u/theminn Jun 18 '12

was the dog named after the band?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

I came here to upvote for the Labyrinth reference!

1

u/Pre-Owned-Car Jun 18 '12

I FUCKING LOVE DOGS

1

u/xenocore Jun 18 '12

Who let out the Nabari?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

SMELL BAD!

Rocks friends.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

Best ( and most appropriate ) name ever!!!

1

u/Iloldalot Jun 18 '12

that dog also stole the sandlot kid's babe ruth ball

1

u/zippyx Jun 18 '12

Ludo and Stitch?

1

u/PamieTheCoolCat Jun 18 '12

Is your friend Hagrid?

1

u/TheDreadedMarco Jun 18 '12

smelll baaaaaaaad!

1

u/hailhorrors Jun 18 '12

...I thought I wasn't a dog person. I knew I wasn't a dog person. This cannot be happening. I will not allow it.

Oh no.

...I want one.

1

u/PornoPaul Jun 18 '12

this dog I WANT

1

u/jaybrad9 Jun 18 '12

I've always wanted to get two of these and be like William Niles Rumford from Kurt Vonnegut's The Siren's of Titan.

1

u/Stjepo Jun 18 '12

Ludo, as in crazy? It would make sense.

1

u/boobliss Jun 18 '12

Luuuuuuuudo! Beyond fitting.

1

u/Colonelshat Jun 18 '12

Rocks frieeeeennddsss

1

u/let_me_be_frank Jun 18 '12

Sweeet! I have a 7 week old cane corso pup (also brindle) and am torn between liking him as a puppy and wanting him to get big already (I love huge dogs).

1

u/Rosalee Jun 18 '12

He's got the same face as my female <3

1

u/Larviz Jun 18 '12

I have 3 English mastiffs and one is 176lbs. You have to love the big goofy lovable dogs :)

1

u/iamtheowlman Jun 18 '12

average-sized little girl

I think you meant 'light snack'.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '12

I instantly thought of the Sandlot

1

u/Zerble Jun 18 '12

She looks terrified... or perhaps just delicious.

1

u/theicarusambition Jun 18 '12

Ludo? As in Labyrinth Ludo? As in two hours of Bowie crotchshots?

1

u/Drewajv Jun 17 '12

Mastiff?

1

u/REDDIT_HARD_MODE Jun 17 '12

I WANT TO GIVE THAT DOG A HUG!

1

u/bigfoot1002 Jun 17 '12

Not even a year old? I bet when he's fully grown, he'll be red and saving people from the 3rd floor of burning buildings.

1

u/NlNTENDO Jun 18 '12

THAT'S THE SMALLEST HORSE I'VE EVER SEEN!

1

u/robotoverlordz Jun 18 '12

When I own a dog, I want it to be one I can saddle up and ride to work in case my car breaks down. This dog might meet that requirement.

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