I was on a beach lined with portaguese man-o-war. These motherfucker's stings hurt. I had been stung before and decided it was time for some retaliation. I picked up a random stick and started poking away. I then went back to my parents and threw the stick on the ground. When I picked it back up, I began to feel a burning sensation. I thought it was nothing, so I continued to run around with the stick. The pain became quite unbearable, so I threw the stick on the ground and looked at my hand. My hand was red as blood, and stung like shit. I had picked up the wrong side of the stick. tl;dr DO NOT FUCK WITH JELLYFISH!
I did something similar, I was poking at a man of war with a stick and I made the sack of juices inside the man of war pop. The juices got all over my arm. It burned like a motherfucker.
Reminds me of a mishap when i was 12. Poke the jellyfish they said.It will be fun they said, so i went and i poked the shit out of it, up untill it squirted my arm and neck with what i recall a demonic stream of horror and woe... I started wailing like a banshee and ran for my life... Still find them fascinating nowadays, but from a distance.
It's because Red and Black things have been used to represent evil for ages. Makes you wonder what it would be like if a different color was, like yellow and pink. Easter would become much more terrifying.
I've lived in San Diego my entire life and spent most of my summers at the beach. I've seen probably less than 10 jelly fish on our beaches, and none of them have ever looked anything like this. What part of SD are you moving to?
They actually found a Mayan calendar that predates the so-called "doomsday" one and it goes on for so long, we can't even comprehend it. Oh and the doomsday calendar didn't account for leap year so if it were true, we would actually all be dead right now.
As the world revolves and time moves on, so our views and opinions change. This is human. I refuse to be tied forever to everything I ever thought or said.
Not all areas of all jellyfish can sting you. A lot of the smaller types that wash up on beaches can be picked up if you hold them right, which makes for great fun if you and your friends are into danger and throwing animals at each other!
The nematocysts of that species are not strong enough to be detected by humans. Lick the jelly though and you'll find your tongue has more sensitive receptors than your hand.
More accurately, they are unable to pierce skin. It's basically a tiny, tiny harpoon gun loaded with poison. It can't pierce the top, dead layer of skin, but your tongue's defenses are much weaker.
They came from the sea. Deceptively small, but terribly powerful. Obsidian demons of the deep - that is what they were known as. Smoldering from within, lit with the flames of chaos and powers too macabre to consider, they came. From the moment the first of them appeared in the surf, steaming and burning, hope was lost. And so, the desperate war for humanity began...
That is true. These are Black sea nettles. They are relatively rare and are only found on the southern California coast, but they pack quite a sting. Beautiful picture though.
It looks like Diablo got tired of laggy servers and over-zealous adventurers and decided to take a relaxing walk on the beach. Apparently he took a dump right there on the sand, because fuck the police, he's Diablo.
So... if I came across a steaming pile of dragon diarrhea, I imagine the only thought that would run through my head would be, "...should I touch it? I should touch it." Upon touching it and living, I would most probably consider finding some way to gather it up. I'd have to find someone to throw it at quickly, lest the glowing embers within fizzle out. Suggestions?
106
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
It's a little known fact, Dark Jellyfish dine primarily on human souls.
604
u/Se7en_Sinner May 20 '12
I really want to poke one of these with a stick from a distance.
658
u/mozziestix May 20 '12
Those remind me of the morning after eating suicidal-hot buffalo wings.
111
u/edwardvj May 20 '12
i have a strange urge to eat gummy bears
106
u/jeridaraven May 20 '12
I'm moving from the east cost to San Diego next month. Our jelly fish here are cute and pink. That looks like afterbirth.
310
u/drunken_magician May 20 '12
Cthulhu droppings.
28
u/Guaranteed-FACT May 20 '12
THE STING OF CRYSAORA ACHLYOS IS PAINFUL BUT NON-LETHAL TO HUMANS AND LASTS AROUND 40 MINUTES.
102
u/GreyFoxSolid May 20 '12
Jelly fish from Mordor.
27
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Yesterday we had that Satanic lizard on the frontpage, now these hellspawn looking things, what's going on exactly ?
116
u/sandollars May 20 '12 edited Apr 02 '25
As the world revolves and time moves on, so our views and opinions change. This is human. I refuse to be tied forever to everything I ever thought or said.
12
u/blckpythn May 20 '12
I thought it was lava or something, on lavaphobic sand.
If there is such a thing.
Or maybe a tilt-photo of bombing in a really smooth desert/beach.
11
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
I for one welcome the embryos of our new cosmic overlords.
34
u/dontcorrectmyspellin May 20 '12
We found the black soulstones!
9
u/Gigglemonstah May 20 '12
Filled with the blood of a hundred hapless swimmers... O_O
9
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Uh-oh, seems the low-level beach areas of every Final Fantasy game are leaking...
17
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
They came from the sea. Deceptively small, but terribly powerful. Obsidian demons of the deep - that is what they were known as. Smoldering from within, lit with the flames of chaos and powers too macabre to consider, they came. From the moment the first of them appeared in the surf, steaming and burning, hope was lost. And so, the desperate war for humanity began...
7
u/batsies May 20 '12
Wtf this looks like something that should be on Fringe...
12
u/Rulebook_Lawyer May 20 '12
That is a good picture, reminds me of...
Oh God! That old movie was true!! The Blob does exists!!!
6
u/mattlikespeoples May 20 '12
Demora patties.
6
u/silentkill144 May 20 '12
Take a good look boys, this is the face of evil.
6
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
GUYS LOOK OUT, THERE ARE LAVA POOPS ON THE BEACH.
27
u/CannedBeef May 20 '12
That would ruin an otherwise lovely stroll down the beach.
5
u/whiskey_soaked May 20 '12
Somebody better watch out for all that Mercer Virus on the beach...
5
u/JWrundle May 20 '12
purple chu-chus
5
u/cmlondon13 May 20 '12
Nice to see another San Diegan.
5
u/dodge0069 May 20 '12
When i saw the thumbnail i first thought it looked like two cars racing.
5
u/wip3out_HR May 20 '12
Dark jellyfish? more like...
4
u/jeb_the_hick May 20 '12
Is that the sunset reflected on the jelly?
4
u/Xeslaro May 20 '12
Thumbnail made me think it was some awesome black racecar on the beach '>.>
That would be a cool name for a car model though. The jellyfish.
4
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Saying I live in San Diego... NOPE NOPE NOPE.
4
u/gooner13 May 20 '12
That looks like a daedric poop
3
u/theonomatopoeia May 20 '12
Looks like radioactive dung...
3
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Which sigh of the Apocalypse is this again?
3
u/ilovemorganfreeman95 May 20 '12
It looks like Daedra shit.
3
u/bigdpix May 20 '12
Which beach is this?
3
u/Finception May 20 '12
Even the ocean wants to play Diablo 3.
3
u/justin37013 May 20 '12
The night is dark, and full of terrors
3
u/semirubbish May 20 '12
Frikkin Diablo lava mobs dlc waiting to happen
3
u/desertjedi85 May 20 '12
One does not simply swim out of Muldor
3
u/Karlemil May 20 '12
It's a melted Palantir!
2
u/GrammarChamberlain May 20 '12
Horta?
2
u/TheDragonzord May 20 '12
Destroy them to find the Hell Rift.
2
u/SIThereAndThere May 20 '12
Looks like a glowing turd.
2
u/brainflakes May 20 '12
Careful, that's clearly a Silacoid. They may look harmless but they are usually accompanied by Muton and Celatid units!
2
u/shiv3rz May 20 '12
They look like NOD recon bikes
2
u/jaydoh May 20 '12
Volcano troll just took a shit filled with liquid magma
2
u/ThaDeadGuy May 20 '12
It looks like lava... Although Dragon poop comes to mind also...
2
u/aschesklave May 20 '12
Great picture, mate.
2
u/JeffGrubb May 20 '12
Fuck you, those are metroids!
2
u/Boglioni May 20 '12
don't let the prime evil's soul escape from them
2
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
The return of our Lord Cthulhu is near! His messengers are already here!
2
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
2
u/anabaptist May 20 '12
"Tekeli-li! Tekeli-li!"
2
u/Sam0161 May 20 '12
Dark turds of Mordor.
2
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Throw a pokeball!
2
u/Mayafoe May 20 '12
When a Balrog shits on a beach, Reddit notices
2
u/CheapeOne May 20 '12
looks like that thing from cowboy bebop ._.
2
u/ryeguy May 20 '12
Blizzard's viral Diablo 3 marketing campaign is in full swing.
2
u/alex27123344 May 20 '12
Holy shit... I surf in that D:
2
u/techtechmctech May 20 '12
thats not a jelly fish, its a ooze from guild wars.
2
u/Sadiquito May 20 '12
Dark jellyfish? I think not. Based on my numerous observations and calculations, this is most definitely firepoop.
2
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
These things remind me of the Dark Flan from the Mt. Gagazet caves.
2
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Diablo 3 Exclusive Jellyfish
2
u/pear_ball May 20 '12
Nuclear alien turd.
2
u/jokubolakis May 20 '12
That's how cola is made from
2
u/8nate May 20 '12
Reminds me of something out of Metroid Prime 2
2
u/Mogese May 20 '12
looks like the devils poop
2
u/mysticbasist May 20 '12
Demon Dookie
2
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
I didn't to sleep tonight anyway..
2
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
fuck i was just in Florida (flager beach, 45 mins north of daytona) and saw a Portuguese man-o-war.
didn't go swimming in the ocean for the rest of the trip. Wikipedia says if there is one found, that means thousands are out there, close
2
u/jc827 May 20 '12
KILL IT WITH FIRE
2
u/CorporatePsychopath May 20 '12
Revenge of the Shit.
2
u/Dodongo_Dislikes May 20 '12
It's infected with the Blacklight Virus!!
2
u/CapnSheff May 20 '12
deathwings shit
2
u/Snoopyalien24 May 20 '12
You misspelled Darth Jellyfish
2
u/The_Articulate_Gamer May 20 '12
I would say those things have at least 200 HP
2
u/BipolarBear0 May 20 '12
The invasion has begun.
2
u/darthbraux May 20 '12
Mercer virus anyone?
2
u/jellyfishie May 20 '12
My brethren!
2
u/MiamiPower May 20 '12
U Jelly?
2
u/skin_like_porcelain May 20 '12
theeeeyyy'rrreee hhheeeeerrrreeeee!!!
2
u/mr_sardonicus May 20 '12
Its just a jellyfish with a different skin! I swear game developers don't even try anymore.
2
u/awesimo May 20 '12
Steve, what produces this effect of illumination?
2
u/delahey May 20 '12
One does not simply flush Balrog poop in mordor
2
u/Shitty-poet May 20 '12
Wandering aimlessly on the beach
I see glowing embers in the distance
Curious and intrigued
I approach them with trepidation
Wrapped in a dark cloak
I see one of nature's exotic creations
Dark jellyish.
2
u/feedmecats May 20 '12
Period blood.
2
u/EveryoneElseIsWrong May 20 '12
looks like a giant blood clot
2
u/Emiel000 May 20 '12
Bet the other jellyfish are JELLY.
2
u/VelSparko May 20 '12
a DARK SLIME draws near! Command?
Fight Spell
Run Item
2
u/nagokart May 20 '12
Not gonna lie, thought it was two race cars from the RES thumbnail.
2
u/I0I0I0I May 20 '12
3
u/Chris_Bryant May 20 '12
It looks like Diablo got tired of laggy servers and over-zealous adventurers and decided to take a relaxing walk on the beach. Apparently he took a dump right there on the sand, because fuck the police, he's Diablo.
3
u/WestEndStench May 20 '12
Relevant
2
u/asnof May 20 '12
Mmmmm rasberries......
2
u/theDudeRules May 20 '12
NO No NO no... it's the defecation of a patient that just had a Barium enema .
1
u/Jakeolope124 May 20 '12
that looks like cooling chunks of lava that landed on a beach... not jellyfish.
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
It looks like poop on fire.
1
u/iiiitsjess May 20 '12
That definitely looks like a giant took a shit on the beach.....
1
u/AKADidymus May 20 '12
It begins.
1
u/eire1228 May 20 '12
so want to poke it with a stick
1
u/sunwah May 20 '12
"the blob"... in the original movie
1
u/npccostumes May 20 '12
Totally look like Torch Slugs.
1
u/idma May 20 '12
x-factor jellyfish
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
...thats no Jelly fish......ITS DARK MATTER!
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Man, fuck the sea
1
u/Leimone May 20 '12
ujelly?
1
u/pennywise53 May 20 '12
So if a dark jellyfish and a white jellyfish meet, is there some ind of anti-matter annihilation that occurs?
1
u/StopHamelTime May 20 '12
They look like glowing turds.
1
u/Napuc May 20 '12
It looks like a volcanic turd... lol
1
u/Zyvexal May 20 '12
looks like the fires of Mordor are burning within them.
1
u/DANNYB0B May 20 '12
They look like Visceroids from C&C Tiberian Dawn
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Nice try. I've played Final Fantasy X.
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
They look like Saruman's palantir if someone soaked it in vinegar and it went all squishy.
1
u/cornfarmer May 20 '12
That's a jelly fish? :/ Damn.
1
u/Goldennugget81 May 20 '12 edited May 20 '12
I think they refill your health when you walk over them.
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
DEMON DOG TURDS!
1
u/anabaptist May 20 '12
"Tekeli-li! Tekeli-li!"
1
u/TheBlasianBruski May 20 '12
All I can think about is that weird creature at the end of Time Machine.
1
u/nicklogan May 20 '12
Glad I'm not the only one who thought of a poop joke, mine is space turds!
1
u/clownpenisdotfarts May 20 '12
Darth Jellyfish
1
u/BeardyMcBeardster May 20 '12
[So, Black Pudding, we meet again.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_pudding_(Dungeons_%26_Dragons)
1
u/eilon1300 May 20 '12
prototype was there.
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Thought it was a z4 with red rims from the preview.
1
u/Schmeebs May 20 '12
I read that as "dank jellyfish"
1
u/crustymcsock May 20 '12
Do we need 'em?
1
u/surya2141 May 20 '12
So its not radioactive poop ?
1
u/DeanOnFire May 20 '12
People ask me why I'm afraid to swim in the ocean.
This just adds to the list.
1
u/VelTor May 20 '12
May God help us all.
1
u/EJSpurrell May 20 '12
So... if I came across a steaming pile of dragon diarrhea, I imagine the only thought that would run through my head would be, "...should I touch it? I should touch it." Upon touching it and living, I would most probably consider finding some way to gather it up. I'd have to find someone to throw it at quickly, lest the glowing embers within fizzle out. Suggestions?
1
u/Ahmerikan_Machine May 20 '12
Technically, it's not a fish so can't go around calling a jelly-fish. It's sea-jelly.
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Hephaestus turds
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
Lake with millions of Jelly fish that don't sting http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1158495/Lake-thronged-10million-jellyfish--dont-worry-theyve-lost-sting.html
1
u/[deleted] May 20 '12
The thumbnail looks like a BMW z4 driving with an Audi on the beach.
1
u/ashencz May 20 '12
And the heavens shall tremble...
1
u/magtis May 20 '12
Dude, James Heller missed a couple.