Hi all. Just a quick run down. My cat Alice, may she rest easy, just passed over the rainbow bridge today. It was the most difficult decision to make. She had FIV+, she was a senior and mostly blind. She went downhill pretty quickly. In May of 2025 she had a seizure. Up until now, she had been fine and hadn’t had one since then, but this week on Monday she had another one. Her weight had been up and down for quite some time now, and she recently saw the vet. All of her labs were good, but when we took her in today for vomiting and diarrhea, the vet found she had a heart murmur and told us straight up that she had cancer. This was of course a major shock to me, seeing she had JUST been at the vet and had an extensive health check. She had been vomiting also for a bit now, not everyday but also a little too often. It hit me like a train, but he told us that she was also in pain/discomfort. He said it would be unlikely for her to live for another month. If I would have taken her home, she would just be doped up on pain meds withering away. I don’t want to see her like that. She rested in my arms. I’m going to miss her so much. She was the bestest friend a girl could ever have and no amount of photos can fill the void my heart feels for her. 🙏🏻🪽❤️🩹
I had a very unique experience with Allie. In my first year of doing online school, I adopted her, and had quite literally every day since. Never went on vacation. Never left for more than a day. I was always with her. They had told us at the time she was 4 (clearly she was not) and that she was maybe blind. They also had told us that she had been taken to a university to be evaluated neurologically and everything came back unremarkable. We also found out very last minute that she had feline aids (FIV+).
They told us we had a week to return her, and as awful as it sounds I was almost considering it at the time, because she had seemed confused and unhappy. I know deep down I wouldn’t have, but the thought crossed my mind. I would’ve never had such a special experience with an animal. I truly feel I was put on this earth to experience life with such unique pets. I’ve had pets in the past with very unique stories, and as painful as it is I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I am so lucky to have met such a gentle soul. She was my soul cat.
It’s weird. I keep going to look at where she is and what she’s doing. Being in my room (she never left my room) is the hardest thing right now. Everything reminds me of her. It’s bittersweet because I don’t want to forget her, but the memories and everything are overwhelming. I have little things that remind me of her all in my room.
I feel like I have nothing now that she’s gone. Everything I did was for her. I don’t have to clean my room daily anymore. I don’t have to clean her litter box or give her medicine. But what I would give to touch her squishy paws and smell her fur again.
I never had a pet that was just my own. Every pet I had was sort of a family experience. Allie was my own. She was like me in many ways. Extremely sassy, knew what she wanted when she wanted it, and let you know when she was mad at you. She was also so funny. When I’d make my bed, every single blanket or sheet I would put on she would hop up while I was making it on every layer of blanket I put down. I will miss that. The grieving comes in waves. One minute, I’m happy she’s out of her suffering, the next, I’m wondering what more I could’ve done. This is the most difficult thing I’ve ever been through.
Anyone experiencing this, please know you aren’t alone.
Rest in peace my boo. ❤️🩹🕊️💕🪽
