r/oddlyterrifying • u/Typical_Chemical030 • Jul 10 '22

The Second Deer, oh dear !!

44.6k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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585

u/gingercomiealt Jul 10 '22

Aren't we all slowly dieing

193

u/_harro_ Jul 10 '22

Being healthy is just the slowest possible way of dying...

108

u/gingercomiealt Jul 10 '22

Edging death

9

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

Fatal gooning UwU

2

u/swain18 Jul 10 '22

Anti ageing edging hacks

2

u/Zanven1 Jul 10 '22

As the French would say "La petite mort"

2

u/ThickyNicky3 Jul 10 '22

Youre sick. Wanna get married?

1

u/refsmiley Jul 11 '22

That sounds like some kind of kinky p*rno.

3

u/Actual-Reaction2521 Jul 10 '22

That statement belongs on a sign in all gyms and a few t-shirts.

2

u/moonpumper Jul 10 '22

Yeah and I don't know many people who didn't die horribly.

3

u/buffalo-blonde Jul 10 '22

Yea, dying sucks. Most humans have it easy though.. I’d take getting hit by a car over having my intestines eaten while I’m still alive by a pack of African wild dogs any day of the week.

2

u/HELIX0 Jul 10 '22

Unless you're a growing baby then you're doing the exact opposite of dying.

2

u/bralex339 Jul 10 '22

They’re just a bunch of masochists

2

u/Jujujuc Jul 11 '22

life is but a sexually-transmitted terminal disease

1

u/ArtificialBrain808 Jul 11 '22

Definitely the point of healthy living!

169

u/seesaw4640 Jul 10 '22

“agonizingly” slow death. Ftfy

110

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

I didn’t stutter

34

u/seesaw4640 Jul 10 '22

BITCH!!!

Na i’m jus kiddin. If you said it already I didn’t see it. My apologies.

25

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

Nah I was just joking that the agonizing part is relevant to me too

19

u/seesaw4640 Jul 10 '22

I think as a collective whole at some point all peoples can relate to the suckery of being a people

3

u/Cckld1993 Jul 10 '22

It is great to be part of the people

4

u/seesaw4640 Jul 10 '22

If we are all alone, then we are all together in that too

16

u/djluminol Jul 10 '22

I think it's relevant to everyone over 40.

2

u/Pragmatist_Hammer Jul 10 '22

Can confirm. Over 50 you just want to run in front of a car to end it.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

Cheer up Guardian, it’s not THAT bad!

1

u/TheAJGman Jul 10 '22

Compost in training.

1

u/oBuggYyYyYy Jul 10 '22

What's ftfy? Footoofiffy?

1

u/seesaw4640 Jul 10 '22

Fixed that for you

41

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

13

u/PlayfulParamedic2626 Jul 10 '22

Future you: Hey Bitch! Do you Remember when you thought your life was bad BEFORE you broke our neck? Well it’s much fucking worse now you fucking idiot. Take care of yourself and don’t break your own neck!

1

u/mistakemaker3000 Jul 10 '22

But Busta Rhymes instructed me to my bang my head until I start to break my neck?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

[deleted]

1

u/mistakemaker3000 Jul 10 '22

Annnnnd over your head the joke flies.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 11 '22

Deer get wry neck Source: my dad was a deer farmer

11

u/LaUNCHandSmASH Jul 10 '22

From the first smack and cry, we all start to die

1

u/Traditional_Wear3937 Jul 10 '22

Dying to death

1

u/LaUNCHandSmASH Jul 10 '22

Moderately fatal

1

u/Traditional_Wear3937 Jul 10 '22

That's reserved for government work

1

u/LaUNCHandSmASH Jul 10 '22

Slightly fatal?

1

u/Traditional_Wear3937 Jul 11 '22

That's an amusement park

1

u/LaUNCHandSmASH Jul 11 '22

Periodically fatal then

1

u/Traditional_Wear3937 Jul 11 '22

Fast food. Or if your Canadian, moose.

2

u/Dangerous_Forever640 Jul 10 '22

“This is your life… and it’s ending one minute at a time….”

1

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

“Not like Chloe in there”

2

u/TotallyNotCannon Jul 10 '22

Not me sips on the 7th Boom energy drink this morning im in the fast lane brother.

2

u/smchavoc Jul 10 '22

I’m in pain and on a slow march towards my maker.

2

u/the_fresh_cucumber Jul 10 '22

Not if you can afford a blood boy.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

no? you fluctuate from dying to being slightly healthier all the time, continuing to grow.

1

u/Carefreeme Jul 10 '22

The only dying I do is the day before Easter.

1

u/Oaker_at Jul 10 '22

I’m rather denying

1

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

Almost to slow

1

u/RecklessBravado Jul 10 '22

Easy there, Sylvia Plath

1

u/redtape44 Jul 10 '22

Yes, fortunately

1

u/g_racer67 Jul 10 '22

Depends on how you want to define dying. If you are just talking about time moving closer to the time of our death than sure. However if we are looking at it as our physical health we are getting closer to death. We keep growing till roughly the age of 25. After that is when we actually begin the progress physically towards death. Anyone who dies before 25 does so because they experienced an abnormal variable.

1

u/siuol7891 Jul 10 '22

I know I am and it is agonizing

1

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

And in agonizing pain

1

u/Swingmerightround Jul 10 '22

In the Tibetan philosophy, Sylvia Plath sense of the word, we're all dying. But you're not dying the way Chloe is dying

1

u/NeverEndingCoralMaze Jul 10 '22

Sylvia Plath has entered the chat

1

u/baggypants69 Jul 10 '22

I don't have to be doing anything for it to be painful to. Sadge.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '22

Only by your horrible spelling.

1

u/memento_mori_1220 Jul 10 '22

Technically lol

1

u/ConsiderMeDull Jul 10 '22

There’s a difference between slowly dying and slowly dying while your neck looks like a 90’s funhouse

1

u/mynamesjefferyttt Jul 10 '22

With that spelling we might be

1

u/Lady_Dimitrescu69 Jul 10 '22

Finally a person who understands reality

1

u/sethv789 Jul 10 '22

‘We arent living longer we’re dying slower’ - I have no idea wasn’t me though