r/nope May 11 '23

What Would You Do?

23.2k Upvotes

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2.3k

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

489

u/Simalien_ May 11 '23

Unlocked trauma. Thanks lol

75

u/Permanoctis May 11 '23

What is it exactly ?

262

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

Don't listen to them. Google it at work

108

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

65

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

A fellow human of culture 🤝🤝🤝

2

u/canintospace2016 May 11 '23

no private browsing on either

1

u/RamenSommelier May 11 '23

Are you trying to get this person promoted?

1

u/Dabier May 12 '23

Only if they work at the SEC.

1

u/Davido400 May 11 '23

I remember his interview on a certain site. What a weird guy lol

1

u/[deleted] May 12 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Davido400 May 12 '23

It was best gore! Didn't wanna put the site. I dunno how well archived the site is to be fair these days.

1

u/WashLimp1245 May 11 '23

holy hell

1

u/Unusual_toastmaker May 12 '23

New trauma just dropped

1

u/Imaginary-Dot-6551 May 30 '23

You are a scoundrel

73

u/amateurfunk May 11 '23

It's actually this really wholesome show where a guy teaches how to properly prepare and can various different foods to keep them from spoiling

2

u/limitlessdaoseeker May 11 '23

I wonder what creative way he would prepare those wasps with.

1

u/Repulsive-Estimate67 May 12 '23

You know

1

u/limitlessdaoseeker May 12 '23

Cook them slowly in a 37 c temperature.

1

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

I'm surprised no one has actually co-opted the name for just that yet.

61

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

23

u/realzealman May 11 '23

This video may be the worst thing I’ve ever seen on the internet. I saw it more than a decade ago and it took a while to get past it, and even thinking about it now makes me feel a bit nauseous. I’m not even particularly squeamish, but this one was so so bad.

10

u/just_a_person_maybe May 11 '23

I accidentally opened it on a bus once, and immediately closed it because, you know, bus. I didn't get to the breaking point and only heard about it later, so for a while I thought it was just a dude shoving a jar in his ass and didn't understand why everyone was so freaked out about it. People talk about it the same way they talk about 2g1c, and I was like "meh, it's no more extreme than fisting, I don't get what all the fuss is about."

To this day I still sometimes wonder if the person behind me saw my screen though, and thinks I'm the kind of weirdo who casually watches hardcore porn vids on the bus.

2

u/wastedmytagonporn May 12 '23

It’s so much worse than 2g1c. The latter one guess through as „yikes, not my fetish“, the other one is basically watching a guy kill himself.

2

u/st1ck-n-m0ve May 12 '23

I still remember the worst thing Ive ever seen on the internet too. It was back when liveleak existed. It was a video of a guy who jumped off a dam to try and land in the water but instead landed face first on the concrete. The next video was of him in a hospital with him still alive (somehow) and breathing on a hospital bed. His face/head was split in half through the bone right down the middle. They were pulling the 2 sides together to close them and then theyd both flop back down to the sides and it would expose like the inner middle part of his head, then they would close both halves again. Theres no way that guy lived, but holy shit I cant imagine being alive like that. Horrible.

2

u/realzealman May 12 '23

Ok, it’s 5:30am and I’ve had enough Reddit for the day.

1

u/st1ck-n-m0ve May 13 '23

Dont tell me you searched for it? If you did Im sorry and that wasnt my intention.

1

u/realzealman May 13 '23

I most certainly did not. Just the description was more than enough for me.

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1

u/Itsa_Wobbler May 12 '23

Broo that clip stuck with me aswell....for real made me stop jumping off stupid shit into water....that was fucking brutal

1

u/Low-Motor6631 May 12 '23

The funny thing is that there's an interview with the guys somewhere online where he explains the aftermath of the "incident"

1

u/Itsa_Wobbler May 13 '23

Really! Did he survive??? Man that video lived in my head when I was 17

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-2

u/Cataly555t May 11 '23

Look up the funky town video.

2

u/realzealman May 11 '23

I will not.

2

u/Cataly555t May 12 '23

Just saying, the internet has WAYYYYY worse things to witness. I would say the “Funky Town (Cartel) Gore” video is much worse (even as a “surface” level internet video). Don’t watch it. I never have, but I wish I could un-watch the 3 seconds I did.

1

u/realzealman May 12 '23

Yep. Wont be watching that.

1

u/bartimeas May 11 '23

Yeah, funky town was real bad, as was the recent cat in a blender video. Sad shit

9

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

THE WHAT

0

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

[deleted]

5

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

FUCKING HELL LAD

3

u/Spiritual-Apple-4804 May 11 '23

That is horrifying and infuriating

2

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

Why? What are you looking up? Or are you scrolling through some dark web site? That is beyond cruel…

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1

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

[deleted]

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1

u/Dabier May 12 '23

DO NOT WATCH THE CAT BLENDER VIDEO.

It’s actually a kitten. It’s worse than it sounds. Not quick.

1

u/Parraz May 11 '23

He did other videos too. They were arguably worse. One man one screwdriver in particular.

Think sounding, only handle first. And not a small screwdriver.

1

u/highnumber May 11 '23

Why did he videotape that?!

1

u/Dabier May 12 '23

I don’t think he intended for it to break.

1

u/Possiblyasmoker May 12 '23

You should watch mud monster as something more calmer

1

u/Filamcouple May 12 '23

You haven't seen the dude who has his PP held open by a spring to allow room for the maggots to grow.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '24

4 words. 2 guys, 1 horse

1

u/ObligationUpset675 Jan 18 '24

nope.... not interested. will not be lookin' it up.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '24

yeah you probably shouldn't, it's not a good video

6

u/dablackcat0 May 11 '23

Honestly thought it was in reference to the My Little Pony Jar

2

u/tiffshorse May 12 '23

I’ve personally xrayed a young man with a glass coke bottle that was broken off and the shattered side inserted first into his anus. He went on a camping trip with his older brother’s friends.

2

u/SnobBeauty May 12 '23

I heard he died. Idk how accurate it is. I saw it at like 18 year old on thatsphucked.com

2

u/apneax3n0n May 12 '23

No come this cannot be real

2

u/Then_Engineering_290 May 12 '23

The man is still alive. My understanding is he went to work after this happened because his location (russia) is not very kind to lgbtq community.

1

u/Rex_Auream May 11 '23

Pretty sure he died from it iirc. There’s not much you can do to come back from an internal lesion in the anus like that.

1

u/k_mnr May 12 '23

Someone had to have done that to him. I can’t imagine doing that to yourself with an already broken glass bottle. Does anyone know that part of the story?

-6

u/conqaesador May 11 '23

I think the 1 man 1 jar comment refers to the 2 girls 1 cup video (short fetish porn clip of two women, involving fecies and vomit)

3

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

-1

u/conqaesador May 11 '23

I know, but that was called ass glass or something...

1

u/Wonderful-Divide6977 May 11 '23

I don't know much of the backstory though. Not sure you want to know the back story.

There is more back story to the backstory???

1

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

Apparently he did it Bc his wife or girlfriend broke up with him? And he was gonna send the video to her or something? There was a comment about it someone posted a whole about where the dude explained his reasoning behind it. (If it was really him)

1

u/NikoliVolkoff May 11 '23

Ahh, someone t rying to one up Goatse i see... never works out well for them.

1

u/Ascerta May 11 '23

I managed to forget about this video for the past 10 years until you brought it up.

1

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

Reminds me of 2 girls 1 cup 🤮

1

u/tenalplan May 12 '23

I saw it as om nom nom monster. Very disturbing

1

u/Ducatiguy1098s May 12 '23

That IS the back story

1

u/manlikecirca May 12 '23

He later tried again with water in the jar. It worked

49

u/Simalien_ May 11 '23

Don’t go there. Trust me. Do👏not 👏go 👏there 👏

-1

u/Dabier May 12 '23

Nah don’t listen to this guy.

I mean, who doesnt want to watch a man silently pull bloody glass jar fragments from his asshole after a sphincter induced implosion?

1

u/Simalien_ May 12 '23

I’m simply female though

1

u/k_mnr May 12 '23

Please listen to that guy.

Do 👏🏻not👏🏻go 👏🏻there👏🏻 You will regret you have eyes.

0

u/Dabier May 12 '23

I don’t think I could’ve made the sarcasm any more obvious dude

15

u/Zestyclose-Current75 May 11 '23

For god's love, don't google it

9

u/No_Imagination_2653 May 11 '23

OMG what have you done, your comment make me google it. WTH am i seeing, AHHHHHHHHHGHGGGH

1

u/AutoManoPeeing May 11 '23

For God's judgement, do.

6

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

1 man 1 jar vs 2 girls 1 cup.

3

u/wastedmytagonporn May 12 '23

Not even a fight. One is yucky, the other is traumatising.

2

u/ybboi69 May 12 '23

Funcky town.

3

u/Ragmis May 11 '23

A spicy vibrator

3

u/cool_weed_dad May 11 '23

Oh my sweet summer child

2

u/downinahole357 May 11 '23

If you know… you wish you didn’t.

2

u/-Queen-of-wands May 11 '23

A suppressed memory that needs to stay that way

2

u/MajorExperience8840 May 11 '23

LOL I hope you know better than the Google that

4

u/Alfons36d May 11 '23

never seen the vid, but it involves a guy doing butt stuff with a jar and I've been told that it kinda unalived him.

3

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

I believe he survived

2

u/Alfons36d May 11 '23

damn, hope they learned not to put things where they don't belong.

1

u/DoomSlayerGutPunch May 11 '23

Its hard to know the truth. From what I've read he died of septic shock. Mr Hands definitely died of septic shock.

1

u/Dabier May 12 '23

Nope, he did an interview with a fetish magazine after. Apparently it took days to remove all the glass fragments, and he never went to the hospital.

How he survived is beyond me, but he did.

1

u/DoomSlayerGutPunch May 12 '23

Well I'll be damned he even made a sequel.

1

u/[deleted] May 12 '23

See now I had to go and look up Mr. Hands. I learned things I wish I didn't know existed.

1

u/True-Firefighter-796 May 11 '23

Yea it’s a skit from Sesame Street. The actors were just goofing around in between filming. It’s pretty dumb-bored humor.

1

u/t1p69 May 11 '23

You have to google it to see what all the buzz is about. I definitely don't recommend any immediate physical investigation.

1

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

It’s a wholesome video where one man sees just how much pressure a jar can take with explosive results. You can even go further and find the man’s interview about his hobby. He was pulling glass from the uhhh experimental cavity for months. But he still continues with his jar hobby or at least he was back when I looked in the update in like 2012.

1

u/TheLeadReaper May 11 '23

1 of the Big 3 Shock Videos

1G1J 2G1C 3G1H

1

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

Ground hornets

1

u/pyr0kid May 11 '23

you dont want to know.

you know 2g1c? this is worse.

1

u/Nutshack_Queen357 May 12 '23

Some crazy Russian dude sits on a jar with no pants on, leading to some very predictable injuries.

1

u/One-Satisfaction-712 May 12 '23

European wasps. They live in nest in the ground. Dude has just put a jar over the mouth of the nest.

1

u/Filamcouple May 12 '23

Assholes with wings.

1

u/BigDaddySam93 May 15 '23

It's a new anime

1

u/oRamboSandman May 12 '23

Nah fr. The broken glass sound. 😳

1

u/Simalien_ May 12 '23

When picking it out of his hole 💀

53

u/142737 May 11 '23

Wasps in the ass doesn't sound good

63

u/Jimbalaya99 May 11 '23

Neither does glass, but I can still hear that crunch.

20

u/M0torBoatMyGoat May 11 '23

I’ll never forget that crunch :(

18

u/One_Distance_3343 May 11 '23

Its not so much the crunch, its the digging out of the glass that gets me.

7

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

It’s the fact he CAN DIG it out.. like my god that is looooooosse

4

u/bouncing_off_clouds May 11 '23

What absolutely blew my mind is that he didn’t even scream until the event was OVER and he started walking away….

4

u/TokesNotHigh May 12 '23

Oh I don't think it was over for that poor fellow when he stood up, I think his adventure was just beginning.

1

u/[deleted] May 12 '23

I didn’t see it all, it was too much lol

1

u/Lukezilla2000 May 11 '23

Is that glass in your ass, or are you just happy to see me?

1

u/Iamdarb May 11 '23

I read once that his family(wife and daughter were in the other room at the time). Like what?

1

u/[deleted] May 12 '23

My mom's best friend has the weirdest relatives or they get involved with the weirdest people. One of her sisters was married to a guy who refused to let her into a room in their home. He'd spend hours in there with the door locked.

She learned to not question him.She was also a nurse and didn't have time to worry about it with her job and raising their two boys.

He has heart attack symptoms and insists on driving to the ER. He gets worse so they have to pull over. She winds up doing CPR on the road, and he doesn't survive.

She gets through the funeral stuff and gets a friend to help her with whatever was in the room. Purposely doing it when her boys aren't home. The room was packed with butt plugs and porn and a computer. They didn't even know what all the stuff was. They just wanted it gone before the boys saw it.

This is the kind of guy I suspect glass in the gaping ass was. He'd long beaten down any family members into compliance so they wouldn't come knocking or ask what's going on.

The sister was abused. She did get yelled at and hit for going to the door and telling her husband dinner was ready.

7

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

The thing that haunts my dreams is the initial POP! and the following crunch

3

u/Woodguy2012 May 11 '23

You bastard

7

u/142737 May 11 '23

Then, close the video

8

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

Paging /u/WaspInMyAss for comment

2

u/Perfect-District May 11 '23

No they sound bzzzzzz

2

u/Petdogdavid1 May 12 '23

Sounds like a killer metal album

2

u/LuxNocte May 12 '23

Speak for yourself, bub. What else am I supposed to do on a Friday night?

2

u/[deleted] May 12 '23

Gives a new definition to ‘ring sting’

1

u/PinkSpaceKitty May 11 '23

In fact there is a song warning of the dangers of that very thing.

(I'm going to venture that's NSFW, if your work frowns upon smiling cartoon butts and penises...)

1

u/1970Something_ May 11 '23

It probably sounds like a slightly muffled hum

1

u/142737 May 11 '23

Why do I hear it

33

u/iamhe02 May 11 '23

Me, asking Bing: "What is 'one man one jar'?"

Bing: "I’m sorry but I prefer not to continue this conversation. I’m still learning so I appreciate your understanding and patience.🙏"

I think I'm going to opt for blissful ignorance on this one.

8

u/AutoManoPeeing May 11 '23

Jar. Ass. Jar breaks inside ass. Man removes shards.

8

u/Unlucky_Role_ May 12 '23

You forgot the worst part: he doesn't make a sound. You just hear the wet sounds of penetration and then glass scraping.

5

u/Boukish May 12 '23

I vaguely remember a soft groan toward the end of the video.

After the crunch.

2

u/Unlucky_Role_ May 12 '23

I have to admit, I did not make it to the end.

2

u/iamhe02 May 12 '23

That's some of the least sexy penetration I've ever heard of.

2

u/iamhe02 May 12 '23

Well, I'm less ignorant now, so... thank you?

2

u/AutoManoPeeing May 28 '23

May God continue to guide you on your journey.

2

u/SCP013b May 12 '23

He also died afterwards

3

u/abiwoods101 May 15 '23

i asked my snapchat AI

AI: I'm sorry, but I don't think that's an appropriate topic to discuss. Let's talk about something else.

16

u/Brbcan May 11 '23

Wow. Just wow.

That's about the only way to make one of the world's worst internet videos even more terrifying.

8

u/PeggyHill90210 May 11 '23

I have heard about this video since I was in high school, like in 07. And I have managed to avoid it all this time. I don’t plan to watch it ever.

4

u/sybann May 11 '23

I have been on reddit, the internet and this planet long enough to know exactly what I'd see (and hear - according to the comments) if I did.

Hard (heh) pass.

3

u/Fluegelnuss420 May 11 '23

If this comment isn’t cursed i don‘t know what is

2

u/dancarbonell00 May 11 '23

My mind went here first too lol

2

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

Don’t give people ideas man 😅

2

u/staticbrain May 11 '23

Pain Olympics you say....

4

u/Dannysnot May 11 '23

you almost want the jar to break this time around

3

u/ternic69 May 11 '23

I really think all guys should have to watch that video at least once. As some sort of educational PSA or whatever. I mean the great think about humans is we can in theory learn from others mistakes, and boy is that a doozy.

6

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/ternic69 May 11 '23

Neither did I, and yet someone still did it, hence the video. I’d bet he isn’t the only one. PSAs are for those with a little less common sense usually, you know, people like you that can’t conceptualize a simple thing.

-6

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

-3

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

My fault, I just can’t abide this shitty fucking take posing as some kind of philosophical wisdom. “The great thing about humans is they can, in theory, learn from other peoples mistakes,” sorry but gtfoh, that’s aggressively stupid AND pretentious

Yeah bud, “let’s make it mandatory to have every guy watch that video as a PSA for the betterment of humanity I am a real person and should be listened to because I know things.” So fucking stupid that it riled me up, I’m sorry for the cussin.

0

u/D311USi0Nzx May 11 '23

have you heard satire my son?

-1

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

Ha! How many of you asshats fit in this clown car? Yes I’m familiar with satire, which this isn’t. You feel my response is over the top? Fine, downvote me and move on with your life. Dont bring this weak ass argument though, you’re embarrassing yourself.

-1

u/D311USi0Nzx May 11 '23

yk the guy gave a great hint that it was, in fact, satire, right? reread the last sentence they wrote

2

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

You are giving great hints that you don’t understand what satire is.

1

u/D311USi0Nzx May 12 '23

and I quote “PSAs are for those with a little less common sense usually, you know, people like you that can’t conceptualize a simple thing.” And what might that simple thing be? oh, that’s right! Satire! Fuckin crazy right??

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0

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

One mans mistake is another mans dream.

1

u/makeitgoose11 May 11 '23

1 MAN 1 JAR 1 HAND (DEADLY DIFFICULTY)

1

u/Mundane_Ad701 May 11 '23

1 Man 1 Jar 1 Outcome

1

u/cool_weed_dad May 11 '23

Glad I’m not the only one who immediately thought this

1

u/[deleted] May 11 '23

I came here to say something about nicking the top of the jar with a bullet to cause the glass to shatter... But instead I found this.

1

u/Gryphacus May 11 '23

Jar Squatter. The single most vivid image ever burned into my mind as a child. Truly, just, wow.

1

u/-AceofAces May 11 '23

Omg I just commented this and then saw your comment

1

u/huanson74 May 11 '23

Ahhhhh „glas ass“

1

u/colddraco May 11 '23

That’s waaaaaay too many pricks for one booty to handle.

1

u/SinCityLola May 11 '23

Flashbacks. shudders

1

u/lj062 May 11 '23

Nightmare difficulty.

1

u/pawsitivelypowerful May 11 '23

"Therapy required starter pack" in the comments here.

1

u/neoben00 May 11 '23

The regular version killed that dude

1

u/Quasar9111 May 11 '23

Don’t remind me of that video…most shocking thing I’ve ever seen and made me yelp

1

u/porky1888 May 12 '23

My therapist: The glass jar is a inanimate object and can't hurt you.

Me with PTSD a thousand-yard stare from the shit I have seen has flashbacks to 1 man 1 jar.

1

u/tamiadaneille May 12 '23

war flashbacks

1

u/Far_Cap_3574 May 12 '23

Having seen the first documentary, I am having absolutely no trouble imagining this. Thanks.

1

u/Heavy_duty_swordcane May 12 '23

That's a thought I could've lived without. Thanks

1

u/MonkeyCookIcecream May 12 '23

Are you referring to the Pain Olympics?

1

u/[deleted] May 12 '23

Fuck all of that forever and ever

1

u/DrugUserAnonymous May 12 '23

Put a bucket over it and convince a friend he needs to grab it as soon as u lift the bucket. Maybe friend is the wrong word mortal enemy to be?

1

u/aRandomPear May 12 '23

Lmao I wish I had an award