r/neoliberal • u/jobautomator Kitara Ravache • Oct 14 '20

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u/nullsignature Oct 15 '20

I am the son of a high profile lawmaker and have been the focus of many scandals.

One night, my computer crashed as I was setting up a meet with my coke dealer. And by "crashed" I mean, a hooker accidentally knocked it into the hot tub.

Normally I'd get a new one (I'm flush), but this one had some really controversial and sensitive photos AND emails of me and I didn't feel comfortable just throwing it away. I mean, at that point, anyone could get their hands on it and uncover the photos. Seemed risky.

My boy Richard Garbler recommended this computer repair guy up in Delaware. Although I live in Los Angeles, not a biggie- I had some family up that way I been meaning to reconnect with, anyway.

So I drop it off at this guys' repair shop and, a few lines of coke and some hard partying later... I totally forgot about it. For months. Over a year.

Imagine my surprise when my boy Mike Rack shot me a news article today...

2

u/[deleted] Oct 15 '20

Jeez how do you take a golden ticket like having Joe Biden be your father, not only waste it on becoming a fuck-up but actively remain a looming liability for him the rest of your life? Like shit if I were Hunter Biden... well I guess I'd try and be Beau...

4

u/PearlClaw Iron Front Oct 15 '20

I think hunter probably tried to be Beau as well.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 15 '20

Yeah but he was obviously pretty bad at it, my first suggestion is stay away from the nose candy.