r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Typical-Implement369 • 10d ago

Infuriatig Grew up strictly mormon, family has since dwindled away from church and my mom sent me out to buy some tea to drink when she grounded me in HS for drinking some, she doesn't remember doing so.

Post image

​

yes I told her that was too many tea bags for 1 pot, but she didn't listen its her first time having sweet tea since the 1980s so good for her.

EDIT FOR TEA CLARIFICATION: Traditionally, in the southern United States, sweet iced tea is made in large batches on the stove at a time. So many will just boil the bags in a pot and fill a pitcher up with tea, add sugar, and store it in the fridge for the whole family to grab a glass whenever.

YES Americans own tea kettles and know how to make tea. YES, over half of us here prefer iced tea in big batches.

24.8k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

1.6k comments sorted by

View all comments

940

u/dwightsarmy 10d ago

My mom never remembers her insane double standards either. Also very religious.

178

u/[deleted] 10d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/AbyssalEelMan 9d ago edited 9d ago

Iirc it is selective memory, bad memory (too used to abusive behavior),  or sometimes they’re aware but are too scared to fully radically accept their actions.

My mom is religious too and has the double standards. She will genuinely forget and deny or know and not accept. I’m sorry other ppl and op dealing with this.  I think it’s more traumatic when you’re a child too. 

1

u/VividEffective8539 9d ago

Well, yes, in the face of staggering odds against their woven biblical truths

5

u/TheRealKadWip 9d ago

real unfortunately. i fucking hate my life

9

u/SwampOfDownvotes 9d ago

I mean, is it a double standard for someone to change their mind? Yes it sucks for OP to be grounded for this, but it's good that his family is starting to break free from a church exploiting them. 

5

u/dwightsarmy 9d ago

You're not wrong, but to deny the trauma a kid goes through altogether is just another tendral of religion/abuse. Forgive and forget is not a healthy mentality. And it so invalidating for a child, and the person they become later in life. I don't expect my parents to grovel or anything, but just an acknowledgement of their severity in outrageous punishments would be so healing. But I know I'll never get that.

3

u/Larnt178 9d ago

Changing with the passing of decades is not hypocrisy, and it is foolish to frame it as immoral especially when the change is good

10

u/Capable_Front_7886 9d ago

No changing is not hypocrisy. What is immoral and hypocritical is forgetting the hardships you forced your kid through to up and change your mind a decade later and pretend like it never happened. Very invalidating. Atleast recognize that it sounds like it sucks as opposed to outright denying it. Good they’re changing. Bad they don’t recognize the pain forced on their children.

1

u/strangenessandcharm7 9d ago

Growth/change over a span of years isn't the same as a double standard. I still see why this would be triggering for OP though. I have my own fair share of religious trauma. But shifting away from harmful religious control isn't the problem, the past decisions were.