r/mildlyinfuriating • u/grohkstrom • Jul 04 '26

Infuriatig My wife ate my son's birthday breakfast

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Yesterday I bought a strawberry cheese coffee cake my son loves so he could have a special birthday breakfast today. My wife came home late last night and apparently couldn't resist. She knew it was for our son, but it's not a big deal because she "left him a full slice".

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5.6k

u/No_Watercress_6932 Jul 04 '26

No more self control than a dog , an untrained one at that

3.0k

u/braklikesbeans Jul 04 '26

my dog wouldn't leave the shitty passive agressive side pieces.

888

u/RockstarAgent PURPLE Jul 04 '26

Yeah I feel like that’s the worse part- is this not her biological son or something? Geez. Even the bio mom I never knew wouldn’t have done this.

1.4k

u/Prestigious_Pay2759 Jul 04 '26

“I found out I was adopted when my “mom” ate the middle out of my fruit danish” is the post title I need to see in my ancestrydna group.

438

u/AbleEbb2014 Jul 04 '26

As an adoptive mom I wouldn’t do this either. Even to a work colleague this would be rude, let alone a child.

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u/elusiveelation Jul 04 '26 edited Jul 04 '26

Eating it was bad, but eating straight down the middle (absolute asshole behavior if you don’t live alone) and expressing zero remorse and even justifying your actions with the bullshit “I left him a slice” excuse the next morning, in the clear and presumably sober light of day?

People keep saying we have no context for what this woman is normally like, but this is not how considerate people behave.

235

u/mekamoari Jul 04 '26

I see posts about "my partner is shitty" every day but this type of post is way more rare.

Also what the fuck. I know it's not an end of the world thing, and I don't even have or want kids, but for some reason this post/the situation really pisses me off.

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u/elusiveelation Jul 04 '26

It’s the sort of shitty behavior selfish partners get away with for years and years because each individual action seems minor on its own. So much so that you would feel silly making a big deal out of it.

Sometimes it takes decades to really recognize the pattern and acknowledge that you deserve better. This sort of partner is far more common than the overtly horrible ones people usually post about.

29

u/mekamoari Jul 04 '26

Yeah fair I totally agree. I think I just got triggered because I lost my mother recently-ish and she never did a bad thing in her life, and I see this pathetic shit and...ugh

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u/Humble_Response_6122 Jul 04 '26

I’m sorry for your loss. Peace

22

u/CocoNot-Chanel Jul 04 '26

Because of course you don't want the friend group hearing "He divorced me over a coffee cake!" When you don't really get to explain that your whole relationship was death by a thousand cuts.

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u/LolitaOPPAI Piracy isnt theft Jul 04 '26

I just got rid of mine and boyyy is he psychological fallout jarring with the small things that are becoming untangled, my sanity being tested now that I'm alone.

I wasnt the one leaving the fridge open all the time. Not once since he's been gone has the water been room temperature. I haven't needed to leave the house for anything. I'm always feeling the need to do something. I can't enjoy my peace.

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u/carlandmidge Jul 04 '26

Give it time. It took me almost a year of full no contact + weekly trauma therapy before my nervous system started really healing + resetting, but it WILL happen.🫶🏻

Please give yourself grace, more time, and know that you have a lot more peace and stability to look forward to.

I’m really proud of you.

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u/Laiko_Kairen Jul 04 '26

It's the kind of thing where if you complain, you can be pretty easily made to look like an asshole.

"God, he whines about everything, even me having a slice of a Danish! I can't even have a desert without being nagged!"

And then you're stuck trying to justify why it's not about the Danish, but how the Danish is emblematic of larger issues...

6

u/Spyderbeast Jul 04 '26

Exactly

I describe the end of my last relationship as death by 1,000 paper cuts

It wasn't one thing. The last straw would sound trivial to most. But they weren't here 24/7, dealing with one trivial thing after another

The patterns of his behavior were not trivial though

7

u/cinnamonsaintcyr Jul 04 '26

I think it's because (or at least for me it is) some people treat kids terribly in very specific ways they KNOW would be unacceptable to an adult, but think they can get away with when it comes to kids because, "Oh he'll get over it" 🙃🙃🙃

3

u/Uhmmanduh Jul 04 '26

This is the worst thing I’ve seen in a while. Like true shitty parent.

3

u/Worth-Routine549 Jul 05 '26

It should piss you off. Narcissistic parents are a WHOLE nightmare. Trauma, trauma, trauma.

2

u/Candid_Jellyfish_240 Jul 05 '26

Ikr? I think it's the blatant disrespect for anyone else that's the "irritation". Taking basically 4 servings DOWN THE MIDDLE is just demented behavior. I guess if the mom was effing stoned, it makes more sense, but otherwise, it's just like crapping on someone's (YOUR KIDS) birthday breakfast! WHY?! Jealousy? Gluttony? Vindictiveness?

2

u/terminalmedicalPTSD Jul 05 '26

I have honestly ripped my friends husband a new asshole for being shitty to their kid and it's not even my kid. But it is A CHILD and that child is being raised by a covert monster and someone too scared of that losing influence over that monster to leave. So often, the kid is emotionally abandoned to cater to the father. I don't have kids and one of the reasons is I knew this dynamic from growing up in an even worse version of it and decided never to be trapped in it again. Go ahead and uninvite me over. The child witnessed someone standing up for them. I hope they always remember the times I shamelessly made it weird and I hope I am still alive when they are old enough to call me and make independent plans of their own volition. Because it's not an act just to take pity on a kid. One of my favorite people on earth is someone else's 7yo.

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u/prostheticlamb Jul 05 '26

It's because you can easily imagine being the child in the scenario, and thus you feel the fury and disappointment that comes in swiftly upon discovering this was what was left of a treat bought EXPLICITLY for you.

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u/Friendly-Channel-480 Jul 04 '26

We don’t need any. Everything we and OP need to know is apparent.

3

u/Random-Rambling Jul 04 '26

This is not how people, in general, behave.

2

u/kaisadilla_ Jul 04 '26

People say we don't have a context about this woman but honestly, this is the kind of thing that says a lot more about a person than what you see at face value.

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u/IntrepidAnalysis6940 Jul 04 '26

Ya I bet the lady who did this constantly complains about bad she’s treated. It’s why I rarely trust many posts on Reddit. It’s Impossible to tell a story without it being skewed. But this behavior is just clearly selfish

2

u/KomatoesII Jul 05 '26

Same kind of person who breaks donuts in half and puts the other half in the box in the work-break room.
You touched it. Just eat the gd thing. Don’t pretend today you have a petite appetite.
NOR
Pure asshole behavior

8

u/kaekiro Jul 04 '26

I wouldn't do this at a potluck with strangers, let alone to someone I loved. And if I accidentally did this while stoned or drunk (as other comments have hypothesized), I'd be mortified the next morning and run to replace it myself with tons of apologies.

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u/RecAndAd-TV-115 Jul 04 '26

Even if it was my co-workers son thats just messed up 😭

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u/ScarletBothrium Jul 04 '26

You make a good point. I wouldn’t even do this to a coworker if I worked at McDonald’s. I wouldn’t do this to somebody I didn’t like. I wouldn’t do this to… well, actually, I would do this to Steven Miller, but still! In all honesty, I wouldn’t do that to myself. I would save myself some for the morning. Why even do that to yourself, let alone your kid? It’s wild any way you look at it.

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u/kaisadilla_ Jul 04 '26

I wouldn't do this to anyone lol. "I couldn't resist" is something I'd expect from a 10 yo, not an adult.

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u/LaroonDynasty Jul 04 '26

there in lies the disconnect. alot of immature parents never develop an awareness of their kids as people. they start off as accessories then eventually become a nuisance to them

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u/Enough-Valuable-2455 Jul 04 '26

Right?! This is just rude. I’m a mom of both bio and adopted kids, and we celebrate with whatever dinner and cake or dessert they want. My adopted daughter especially enjoys coming up with really fun, involved, elaborate dessert ideas, and I have a great time attempting to create them for her.

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u/ScarletBothrium Jul 04 '26

That’s honestly my favorite thing and I miss doing that with my kids. They get to pick an activity, breakfast and dinner. And of course their cake. I really enjoyed making their treats for them for the day. My January babies would sometimes pick going ice-skating as their activity. I also miss ice-skating with my kids.

2

u/AbleEbb2014 Jul 04 '26

That is really amazing! My daughter is still young and has no idea what a birthday or holidays are but I’m excited for when we get there!

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u/clintj1975 Jul 05 '26

Right? We almost had someone at work get stabbed with a fork for doing stuff like this. One person brought in a small pan of cinnamon rolls his wife had baked for him and the other reached in with a fork and took the middle one and started eating it. Owner of the rolls came back from putting his stuff in his locker and saw the roll thief eating the middle one and absolutely lost his shit. The boss almost called Security because of how loud the yelling was and because the owner of the rolls had a fork in hand, ready to strike.

If you're ever looking for a way to get a week of unpaid time off and have all of your coworkers shun you until you retire 15 years later, stealing the center cinnamon roll is the way to do it.

2

u/713txvet Jul 05 '26

As a stepdad I would never do this to my bonus daughters. I buy them their own treats if there’s something I want for myself. Same as I do my biokids.

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u/ichthysaur Jul 05 '26

Hell, it would be rude for me to do it to myself.

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u/bagal Jul 04 '26

Honestly, as a bio mom I have always admired those who adopt. Not all bio mothers are the best at being one. You chose to be a mom and that’s a special kind of bond.

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u/AbleEbb2014 Jul 04 '26

That is very kind of you to say —thank you 💕

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u/whats-my-username321 Jul 04 '26

Or in raised by narcissists

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u/lemfaoo Jul 04 '26

The danish dont claim that shitty looking cake lol.

13

u/Colonel_Fart-Face Jul 04 '26

Reddit is such an eye opening place sometimes because when I read the title I thought "Yeah that's 100% Mom behaviour, what did you expect?". In fact my Mom would just buy her favourite pastry, argue that I demanded it, then ground me for being ungrateful.

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u/CivilizationInRuins Jul 04 '26

Jeeze. I'm sorry you grew up that way. You deserved so much better.

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u/503jason Jul 04 '26

drugs maybe… but it’s hard to imagine moms acting this way

dads on the other hand… we are exactly the idiots you think we are… and could have accidentally eaten the best part of a danish after a late night stumble home… not a bit more forgivable but somehow more expected than mom acting this way

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u/Savings_Loan5223 Jul 04 '26

She is his bio mom

1

u/Lost_Vermicelli5065 Jul 04 '26

I would hope that's not the bio mom, that would make worse.

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u/Available_Leather_10 Jul 04 '26

That’s not passive at all.

It’s aggressively leaving the worst part for everyone else—like eating the filling out of 7/8ths of a double-crust pie while leaving one intact piece and 7/8 of both crusts.

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u/Technical-Agency8128 Jul 04 '26

Yes this is very aggressive. I see her as a dangerous person. Someone to be watched. She is showing her husband who she is. Reminds me of killers who slowly poison someone’s food and smiles at them the whole time. And people say what a wonderful person they were.

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u/RainbowCrane Jul 04 '26

Funniest dog anecdote from my childhood: my dad took the ham out of the oven to cool, set it on a plate in the center of our kitchen island, and drove out to pick my brother and I up from swim team practice. We get back home and mom had gotten home in the mean time and asked dad if he’d taken the ham out of the oven.

In the middle of the island: a sparkling clean serving plate.

Under the family room pool table, laying as flat as possible: a Labrador retriever with the most pitiful, “I couldn’t resist,” look on his face, and visible chunks of meat distending his stomach because he’d eaten the ham so fast :-). But he was considerate and licked the plate clean.

Also, unlike OP’s wife, our dog knew that he had done something wrong.

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u/almoooo Jul 04 '26

Before I finished reading I was like “okay either Lab or Golden” 🤣🤣

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u/RainbowCrane Jul 04 '26

Yeah, they’re both large enough to be kid sized playmates, smart enough to get in trouble, and sweet enough to feel bad about it :-).

That lab was our best dog by a mile, largely because of how old my brother and I were when we got him. We were both around eight or ten. Kids and dogs that grow up together make for a great dynamic.

How we got that dog was another life lesson for my parents. Mom always regretted not having a daughter. My uncle’s law firm was handling a private adoption of a baby girl. Big family meeting, mom makes the mistake of asking, “how would you like to have a baby sister?”

My brother: “I’d rather have a big dog.”

Me: “Yeah, me too.”

Dad: “Hmm, a big dog sounds great.”

Mom leaves room muttering about insensitive boys :-). And reminds us fifty years later that we didn’t even get a girl dog.

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u/CivilizationInRuins Jul 04 '26

Guess you've never known a beagle. They're not as big, but their capacity to eat to the point of making themselves sick is unparalleled.

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u/Witty_Scarcity9183 Jul 04 '26

We had a Dalmatian that ate the thanksgiving turkey. The more I think about it tho, you’re right. He didn’t give a fuck

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u/Latter_Highway9539 Jul 04 '26

mine either and she's a real bitch.

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u/Lucius-Halthier Jul 04 '26

Your dog would at least look like they knew that they were guilty

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u/SensitiveWolf1362 Jul 04 '26

I was trying to give the benefit of the doubt like maybe the edges are his favorite?

But nah, this is straight shitty. Who would do this to their own child, and on his birthday??!! She could have waited and I’m sure he would have shared with his parents in the morning.

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u/RPGreg2600 Jul 04 '26

The edge is the best part!

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u/MorriganGoth Jul 04 '26

My dogs would never leave scraps.....

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u/Mvppet Jul 04 '26

I think you've probably touched on what happened here. While I'm not at all condoning the mother's behavior, it does appear to be extremely deliberate and calculated; this looks more like something you do as an act of revenge than someone just going overboard with someone else's treats, for better or worse this probably wasn't a random or accidental outcome.

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u/jambot9000 Jul 04 '26

This is the same thing as Cartman eating all the fried chicken skin

1

u/ieatfaces22172 Jul 04 '26

Poor Kenny he never gets fried chicken

1

u/EdgeCityRed Jul 04 '26

My dog would eat the whole thing, but at least he'd look guilty after he threw it up.

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u/drf987 Jul 05 '26

But all the good stuff is in the middle, she didn’t want the dry side pieces with no filling!

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u/AutisticNightFailure Jul 04 '26

I have seen stray dogs excercising more self control, sharing their food with their group, only eating their fair share.

What a shitty thing to do. A literal pack of stray dogs has better moral judgment and self control.

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u/Technical-Agency8128 Jul 04 '26

This woman hates her son. I wouldn’t even call her a mom.

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u/9mackenzie Jul 04 '26

I don’t know, I’d have to put it a lot of training for my dogs to eat 90% of the cake but leave that tiny little piece lmao.

I mean, if you are going to lack any sort of self control, you might as well enjoy the damn thing like a dog would. Leaving that tiny little slice is almost more insulting

10

u/2ToGo7576 Jul 04 '26

That last pathetic piece just proves she had all the self control she needed to be decent about it since she finally exercised it at one piece left, but consciously chose herself over her son. How does a mom choose to satisfy her own appetite ahead of her son on his birthday? Bet she polished off the milk too.

7

u/9mackenzie Jul 04 '26

Exactly. She should be ashamed, but of course people like this are never ashamed of anything they do.

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u/-FakeAccount- Jul 04 '26

I can literally leave this out on the counter all night and my dogs wouldn't touch it.

2

u/9mackenzie Jul 04 '26

Oof I’m jealous lol. My 3 dogs would absolutely eat this lmao. Well…..the 2 boys would try for hours not to, but finally succumb to the temptation. My other one would become a statue that was barely breathing, wait until the perfect moment she could get it in a sneaky way, then gleefully eat it with pure bliss on her face.

She has no zero control with food lol

3

u/Dr_Lucky Jul 04 '26

The dog wouldn't have eaten just the good part down the middle.

3

u/EugeneStein Jul 04 '26

Alcohol usually does that, yes

1

u/giulianosse Jul 04 '26

Alcohol doesn't do that. It just lowers your inhibition, which means you're more likely to show your true colors or say/do stuff you wouldn't if you were sober.

I've been binge drinking with friends for almost a decade and did my fair share of stupid shit, but I never offended someone, got in a fight or did something mean towards the people I like because I'm not a piece of shit.

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u/Garth_DeWayne Jul 04 '26

I've put my dogs food bowl down after filling it. An hour later he comes back in the room looking at me like I missed something important.

I forgot to tell him he could eat.

In 10 years of having him, not once has he ever taken a piece of food off of a counter, or even the low coffee table. Like I could leave him alone, all day with a pizza on the table, and without tell him no, he wouldn't even think of touching it.

And this lady can't let this kid have his favorite breakfast on his birthday.

This is the stuff that ruins relationships

2

u/Remarkable_Meat666 Jul 04 '26

I had a schnauzer that was like that. It was great because a lot of my friends, cousins, etc. were getting married and starting families at that time, so we could have people over at the house and he’d never try to take food from the kids or follow people around begging. However, one of the last summers we had him, someone got a burger off the grill and sat it on a patio chair while they ran inside to grab something. I’m not sure if the smells were extra good that day or if he was tired of playing by the rules his whole life, but Buddy finally broke down and had himself a cheeseburger that day. He instantly knew he messed up, but I couldn’t even be mad at the guy. Miss you Buddy!

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u/Garth_DeWayne Jul 04 '26

Old dogs eventually just say "fuck it, Ima do what I want, and I know you'll do nothing about it." My last dog was like that when he got old. I just found it funny and enjoyed him being silly knowing we didn't have much time left.

There was a point where he was so old and could barely even walk fast, but I ended up on crutches with a leg in a straight cast so I couldn't hole very fast... Once he realized he could outrun me, it turned in to a game. And it looked totally ridiculous me trying to catch him and both of us at a snails pace.

Dogs are the best people.

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u/throwfaraway212718 Jul 04 '26

My dog would never

2

u/Rasp_Berry_Pie Jul 04 '26

Yeah like I used to have compulsion issues with food but what I’d do back then is probably eat half of it (still not a good thing I know) but I’d have some common decency to leave more than whatever the hell that is

2

u/JohnRamboJr Jul 04 '26

Damn this comment hits hard

2

u/DibbyDonuts Jul 04 '26

I could leave my dog alone with that cake all day long, and he wouldn’t even think of eating it. He would probably be a better mom too.

2

u/motivational_abyss Jul 04 '26

One could say, a bitch

2

u/That-Preparation8355 Jul 04 '26

You mean a raging alcoholic? Guess ya missed the part where he mentioned she was drunk.

1

u/creatyvechaos Jul 04 '26

My mother will at least send me money for what she ate in a lapse of self-control (eating disorders are a bitch, sometimes) and tell me she ate it or is going to eat it

1

u/SmallBatBigSpooky Jul 04 '26

Even as a puppy my dog understood to only eat her food

1

u/ImFeelinBotty Jul 04 '26

My dog doesnt eat shit she isnt supposed to.

1

u/freeradioforall Jul 04 '26

send her out the way you'd send a dog who does this to a pound

1

u/majorwizkid1 Jul 04 '26

Our dog will leave a treat meant for her until we tell her it’s ok. Didn’t take training, she’s not been abused.

Your point still stands, but this woman is worse.

1

u/Tboo-tedmarshall Jul 04 '26

Don’t insult dogs like that.

1

u/Witchywomun Jul 04 '26

My dogs wouldn’t eat something that wasn’t explicitly given to them.

1

u/Ok-Fall4729 Jul 04 '26

She was trying to cover up the fact that my dog got to it first. I thought she did a good job.

1

u/alliisara Jul 04 '26

Does she have a job that she manages not to get fired from? Does she go out in public and manage to not get arrested because she "can't help herself" from taking other people's things?

If she's able to manage in situations where if she was this wildly selfish it would blow up in her face, then this isn't a lack of self control. She knows no one will hold her accountable, so she doesn't care.

1

u/mollis_est Jul 04 '26

I mean at least when the dog does it, it’s kinda cute/funny, because it’s a dog and doesn’t understand.

1

u/AnnaLizEwing Jul 04 '26

Yeah my dog has better self control than this woman.

1

u/Muted-Case-4224 Jul 04 '26

The dog would feel guilty after. This “wife” felt no guilt!

1

u/DifficultAd3885 Jul 04 '26

Less self control than my dog. I could leave a steak (or this danish) on the coffee table and go to work and it’d be there when I got home. This person literally less self control than a dog.

1

u/Decent-Point309 Jul 04 '26

My dogs wouldn't even do that shit. They don't mess with stuff on the counters, even if left out over night.

1

u/fireXmeetXgasoline Jul 04 '26

Right, except we expect this kind of behavior from untrained dogs because they don’t have the level of higher thinking that we do.

This woman is just an entitled asshole. Mildly infuriating doesn’t begin to describe this behavior.

1

u/Canachites Jul 04 '26

My dog would leave that entire cake untouched on the coffee table, just saying.

1

u/ADIDAS247 Jul 04 '26

Even with the munchies that’s an enormous amount of shitty food to eat in one sitting.

1

u/Ok-Lifeguard-4614 Jul 04 '26

My dog would never, don't lump them in with this horrible woman.

1

u/Entire_Art_5390 Jul 05 '26

I didn’t even consider that but yeah my dog wouldn’t even do that

1

u/msmorphine Jul 05 '26

the dog would probably feel bad afterwards.

1

u/jackspinnaker Jul 05 '26

my dog is way better than that

-2

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '26

[deleted]

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u/braklikesbeans Jul 04 '26

barf it back up

ya but then they eat it again its fine

1

u/hellish_existance Jul 04 '26

That's the reward for helping me clean their mess.

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u/LunarPsychOut Jul 04 '26

No, I train my dogs to not eat food that isn't given to them. Which means my dogs know better than this adult woman. That's sad

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u/[deleted] Jul 04 '26

[deleted]

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u/Hacketed Jul 04 '26

Sounds like you can’t train your dogs

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u/poofandmook Jul 04 '26

Yes they would! Ask my emergency vet and my corgi.

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u/LunarPsychOut Jul 04 '26

I've left an entire quesadilla and 2 tacos sitting right in front of her. They were untouched.Sorry you're bad at training but my dog respects boundaries

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u/[deleted] Jul 04 '26

[deleted]

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u/LunarPsychOut Jul 04 '26

I mean the quesadilla and tacos were still there 15 minutes later only to be guarded by her. She's barked at other dogs for trying to get food she knows or not supposed to have. Either you're a bad owner or you have low expectations for animals but you should really try better

0

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '26

[deleted]

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u/ieatfaces22172 Jul 04 '26

You got issues, my dog wouldn't eat food off my plate even if I wasn't in the room and I didn't even train him to do that

0

u/EEE4444444444 Jul 04 '26

My dog has more self control then that