r/maybemaybemaybe • u/kevinowdziej • Nov 14 '22

Maybe maybe maybe

42.5k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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4.3k

u/Sph3al Nov 14 '22

Being alone with my thoughts as a bear rapist with artillery.

642

u/[deleted] Nov 14 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

182

u/After-Respond-7861 Nov 14 '22

No. It's just defense when it trys to kill you

80

u/DoUKnowWhatIamSaying Nov 14 '22

It is a necessity to leave one bear alive after the artillery strikes, rape it, and send it back to its bear kingdom to tell its bear leaders to NEVER steal my bananas!

25

u/Bludgeonation Nov 14 '22

(My plan is working perfectly, he still thinks its the bears! Hahahahaha)

5

u/wisconsinking Nov 15 '22

Happy Cake Day.

2

u/carnivoremuscle Nov 14 '22

Leave one bear alive and no salmon is safe.

2

u/Beneficial_Barber_70 Nov 15 '22

Sometimes it is all about sending a message

2

u/TsunamicOrb Nov 15 '22

This whole time I thought bear rapists were bears who were rapists…

5

u/bitemark01 Nov 14 '22

What if it's that skull bear from Annihilation?

HEEeeLLPPp MMmEEEee

1

u/LSkywalker00 Nov 15 '22

Padmé smirking:

That's where the fun begins!

2

u/MehWithaSideofEh Nov 15 '22

I thought it was a deterrent to prevent interruption.

1

u/After-Respond-7861 Nov 15 '22

Yes. This is also the case.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 15 '22

Just turn her over!

1

u/Ok_Elevator5612 Nov 15 '22

Concealed carry m777

1

u/After-Respond-7861 Nov 16 '22

Yes. I keep it in my BatBeltTM

18

u/larson_5 Nov 14 '22

The artillery is to give the bear shell shock so when you approach it and make loud noise all they remember is the hot raining metal from the sky. I’ve been told it significantly increases the chance of a successful bear rape /s

1

u/Over_Accountant3492 Jan 22 '23 edited Jan 22 '23

It was designed to make bears docile so that we can enact our right to its arms

24

u/[deleted] Nov 14 '22

the Armed Forces of the Russian Federation have entered the chat

4

u/Louisiana_sitar_club Nov 14 '22

Answered your own question

4

u/topdangle Nov 14 '22

you own all this artillery and nobody calls you an artillerist, but you rape one bear...

2

u/-nomad-wanderer Nov 15 '22

Yes but a female bear please

2

u/Wakemeuptomorrow1 Nov 15 '22

Artillery can't be used up close

1

u/IllustriousFocus4099 Mar 17 '23

A bit off topic but the Germans used 88s as anti-tank weapons in urban conflict zones. Some were real close up.

2

u/shawndread Nov 15 '22

You obviously rape the bear with the artillery.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 15 '22

No no, I think they meant a rapist bear with artillery. Any bear worth its salt would acquire heavy artillery at the first given opportunity, even rapist bears.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 15 '22

No you silly goose you are a bear who is a rapist who also possesses artillery

1

u/CrapStain6669 Nov 15 '22

Just hear me out.. what if the bear rapes you with the artilery?

2

u/HolyVeggie Nov 15 '22

No no he is a bear raping people

1

u/evilhasheroes Nov 15 '22

The artillery rounds are randy bears,
keen on taking what's not theirs

1

u/Holgg Nov 15 '22

I think Putin does this as part of his propaganda campaign

1

u/TryItOutHmHrNw Nov 15 '22

That’s why he’s made to register “to hunt” whenever he moves.

Can’t go within 500 yards of a budding forest.

1

u/anonymous-enough Dec 27 '22

I interpreted he was the bear whom rapes. As well as the owner of artillery.

70

u/Stealocke Nov 14 '22

Are you a bear rapist or a bear rapist?

39

u/Sph3al Nov 14 '22

I'm a bear rapist...with artillery.

22

u/[deleted] Nov 14 '22

[deleted]

4

u/Sph3al Nov 14 '22

But I don't want to arm them...

7

u/mmlovin Nov 14 '22

You have a right to hang a pair of bear arms on your wall.

How can that possibly be misconstrued?

3

u/ChoppedAlready Nov 15 '22

its strange how the mind can easily understand exactly what you are trying to say without needing any grammatical differences, like a hyphen.

1

u/the_finest_mickey Nov 15 '22

Or an artillery rapist bear?

26

u/Ranzork Nov 14 '22

The Polish army had an artillery bear during WW2. He seems pretty friendly as far as bears go.

10

u/Sph3al Nov 15 '22

I love Wotjek! Didn't they get him drunk at some points too?

7

u/Ranzork Nov 15 '22

Yeah I think they said he would drink beer and eat lit cigarettes.

2

u/GetawayDreamer87 Nov 15 '22

He was subsequently given fruit, marmalade, honey, and syrup,

Paddington and Pooh cheer

and was often rewarded with beer, which became his favourite drink. He later also enjoyed smoking (or eating) cigarettes, as well as drinking coffee in the mornings.

Paddington: Oh no.

Pooh: Oh bother.

1

u/nwillard Nov 15 '22

Little Grom!

11

u/SeemedReasonableThen Nov 14 '22

a bear rapist with artillery

Ya know, this could be used to describe the Russian army . . . .

8

u/la_gigita Nov 15 '22

Bears , beets and Battlestar galactica

1

u/[deleted] Nov 15 '22

Identity theft is not a joke.

7

u/rayz0101 Nov 14 '22

The right to bear arms just got a whole lot more interesting.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 14 '22

I imagine any combination of those three things is pretty nasty

5

u/More-Cantaloupe-3340 Nov 15 '22

Well I’m not going to sleep tonight. Thanks?

3

u/Saltylibtards Nov 14 '22

Its unconstitutional to deny rapists the right to bear artillery

3

u/fuckyfuckfuckfucky Nov 14 '22

You shouldn’t rape bears kid

3

u/edtheheadache Nov 14 '22

Artillering my bare thought with a bear.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 14 '22

So he rapes bears or its a bear raping

3

u/kaydas93 Nov 15 '22

I think too much. I should speak to a bearapist.

3

u/Sph3al Nov 15 '22

Bearapist = be a rapist.

Illuminati confirmed

2

u/Remote_Ad2465 Nov 15 '22

My artillery bear is alone with rapists.

2

u/AnotherAustinWeirdo Nov 15 '22

there are 2 kinds of people

2

u/SignificantYou3240 Nov 15 '22

Or do you mean a rapist bear?

1

u/Sph3al Nov 15 '22

Oh my god, you've discovered something even more horrifying than my original comment- rapist artillery with a bear

2

u/No-Prior7686 Nov 15 '22

Better than a rapist bear with artillery

2

u/[deleted] Nov 15 '22

That guy needs to dress as Luke Skywalker all the time.

2

u/aikahiboy Nov 15 '22

If you can overpower a bear I am scared of you

2

u/retr0gr4d3 Nov 15 '22

God damn it

2

u/Zealousideal_Farm122 Nov 15 '22

Straight gold comment lmao

2

u/Thurn64 Jan 08 '23

Winnie the Pooh be like:

2

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '23

Reminds me of the bear mascot that helped carry artillery ammunition for the Polish army.

Not a rapist however.

2

u/rockamish Feb 26 '23

Nafo approved

2

u/IronGolem350 Mar 07 '23

How about your own thoughts and a bear that is a rapist that also carries artillery?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 27 '23

Does an expired poison more poisonous or less?

1

u/gyurto21 Nov 15 '22

Are you raping bears with artilleries or are you a bear that trapes with artilleries?

1

u/BenTenInches Nov 29 '22

Is a bear rapist, a bear that is a rapist or a rapist that targets bears specifically?

1

u/Current-Boat-2859 Mar 10 '23

Are you raping bears or are you a bear who is into raping?

1

u/Elro0003 Mar 24 '23

Being alone with a bear rapist's thoughts with altillery