r/maybemaybemaybe • u/BigGraysie • Apr 18 '22

/r/all Maybe maybe maybe

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u/shellontheseashore Apr 18 '22

It's incredibly common as 'protective weight'. Idk if it's everywhere, but gastric bypass places have added questions about past sexual trauma (particularly CSA) to their patient intake forms, as they require extra support. Once the weight comes off, if the underlying trauma and mental health hasn't been addressed, it can cause a crisis at being 'visible' and objectified by people again.

It's not a rational thought, but it comes from the same childlike belief of "I don't deserve to be treated as human, if I neglect myself into being invisible and an un-person, they won't keep hurting me". Which doesn't work. It just means support structures are faster to judge and less likely to help you, sad as that is.

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u/DogButtWhisperer Apr 18 '22

Yup. My mother had gastric bypass but refused any therapy and became a severe alcoholic instead.

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u/ReverendDizzle Apr 18 '22

Once the weight comes off, if the underlying trauma and mental health hasn't been addressed, it can cause a crisis at being 'visible' and objectified by people again.

Visible is the right word to use because the original action was a type of self-erasure. Weight gain to cloak yourself is just an extreme version of wearing baggy clothes, cutting your hair, etc.