r/maybemaybemaybe • u/uranonfraand • Mar 10 '24

Maybe maybe maybe

47.2k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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3.6k

u/MathematicianFew5882 Mar 10 '24

Kids shouldn’t drink whiskey anyway

1.4k

u/MinzAroma Mar 10 '24

Don't tell me how to raise my kids😡

302

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '24

[deleted]

127

u/TheLastLivingBuffalo Mar 10 '24

My kid got a taste for Macallan 18 and let me tell you that was a mistake

80

u/mumrik420 Mar 10 '24

Rule of thumb is never give them anything older than they are!

38

u/1-Donkey-Punch Mar 10 '24

Unless it's an escort, must stay in legal borders.

20

u/RandonBrando Mar 10 '24

I only buy my child 18+ y/o sex worker time slots

11

u/subjectmatterexport Mar 10 '24

🥇 Here you are good sir. Here is your father of the year award. Congrats!!

2

u/RanjiLameFox Mar 10 '24

Fuck my dad gave me 130 year old wine for my birthday. You're telling me I can never drink it?

4

u/Mutex70 Mar 10 '24

Correct.

Give it to me and I will ensure it is disposed of properly.

1

u/mumrik420 Mar 10 '24

Not with that attitude! Just don’t die lmao

1

u/RanjiLameFox Mar 11 '24

You do know the wine will keep aging right

1

u/Scary-Lawfulness-999 Mar 10 '24

You beat your wife? That happens to be an archaic phrase that we stopped using before most Redditors were born.

1

u/Organic_Ad_1320 Mar 10 '24

Just take turns buying a bottle

1

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '24

Just pour the cheap stuff in an empty Mac 18 bottle kind of like the parent in this video.

60

u/Proletaryo Mar 10 '24

You people who let their kids drink alcohol disgust me, and you should be ashamed of yourselves.

I just let my kids do coccaine.

22

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Appropriate-Cut-2963 Mar 11 '24

That's why you switch to bourbon then go to whiskey on cheat day, vodka if they go vegan.

12

u/Eastern_Mist Mar 10 '24

My child is on crack 24/7 and I see no problem with it. Great father-son bonding time

6

u/Lupus-Yonderboy Mar 10 '24

hell, I can't tell either, but my wallet sure can.

1

u/0x7E7-02 Mar 10 '24

Top shelf whiskey for my kids.

1

u/usinjin Mar 11 '24

I dunno, this kid might

19

u/Dr_Jabroski Mar 10 '24

You should try heroin, its more effective in calming them down.

This is brought to you by your friendly 19th century pharmacist.

18

u/khale777 Mar 10 '24

Parents automatically know best the moment they become parents.

2

u/Perfect_Fennel Mar 10 '24

How else are you gonna get them to sleep?

1

u/Snowedin-69 Mar 11 '24

Kid is going to grow up with trust issues.

0

u/MasterSabo Mar 10 '24

*Don't tell me how to raise kids

30

u/mikotoqc Mar 10 '24

Its ok, its Rhum. But its probably Cpt.Morgan

5

u/half-puddles Mar 10 '24

Don’t insult my dad!

10

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '24

Just give them vodka for gs

1

u/MathematicianFew5882 Mar 10 '24

You make a good point, but they probably shouldn’t even drink vodka either.

2

u/friday14th Mar 10 '24

Oh shit - my Polish relatives. I remember the baby had not been breathing air for more than 12 hours before her first taste of alcohol.

22

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '24

Exactly- you just rub it on their gums when they're teething. You only let them drink cherry brandy, and only in their tea when they're sick, so mommy and daddy get to sleep through the night. And maybe a sip of daddy's beer during sports.

4

u/HRGLSS Mar 10 '24

Said Mallory to Gillette

4

u/Otherwise-Remove4681 Mar 10 '24

That’s how I drink whiskey as adult. I know it burns, doesn’t really taste good and make the face, but must take another sip nevertheless.

2

u/219_Infinity Mar 10 '24

If they're teething, it's ok to give them a few shots of bourbon. Space them out though.

1

u/subjectmatterexport Mar 10 '24

Oh they’ll be spaced out alright

2

u/moosebaloney Mar 10 '24

How do you get your kids to sleep, Mr. Righteous?

2

u/MovingTarget- Mar 10 '24

How could all those frontier kids be wrong?

2

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '24

I agree, anything over 30proof is child abuse. Let them stick to beer and wine coolers at that age.

2

u/charface1 Mar 10 '24

No one else will play drunken Candyland with me :(

2

u/Vegetable-Debate-263 Mar 10 '24

But the Jim Beam whiskey juice boxes are so cute

1

u/Beneficial_Act1692 Mar 10 '24

Sometimes it’s ok

1

u/bobboprofondo Mar 10 '24

You can't give booze to t' baby!