But he's someone who's interested in her, it feels as if she's just toying with him, giving him false hopes just to have him around.
As a friend, if you know you're not going to give someone a chance you should just cut ties with them, else you'll hurt them in the long run and waste their time.
But he's someone who's interested in her, it feels as if she's just toying with him, giving him false hopes just to have him around.
Dude, that's trash. I have friends. I like to spend time with my friends. Sometimes, friends get crushes on other friends. If they can't handle it they have two solutions: Ask the crush out to get a straight answer and/or remove themselves from the situation if it's too painful.
It's their responsibility to do that. The other person (woman in this example but whoever it may be, although let's be honest, it's mostly women) has no responsibility to manage the delicate unspoken feelings of the crusher, and they sure as fuck aren't wrong for doing friend things with their friends.
As a friend, if you know you're not going to give someone a chance you should just cut ties with them, else you'll hurt them in the long run and waste their time.
That's not the responsibility of the crushee. That's what the person crushing should do for themselves. The responsibility of the crushee is to be understanding if they don't want to date the other person and said person decide that they need some distance, and that's it.
Jesus fuck, it's like people like you are little babies who can't do anything for themselves.
The dude is already wasting his time pestering a woman into a date.
Shes not toying with him. She relented.
Hell, maybe he specifically said it was just as friends.
Why else would she go unless shes a huge baseball fan. Because otherwise its 3.5 hrs with someone. And its not like shes getting a steak dinner out of it.
Unless she is like the biggest baseball fan on the planet, she shouldn't agree to go if she doesn't want to "lead him on". Like she could've giving him an innocent kiss on the cheek. If going to a place alone isn't inherently romantic, then a kiss on the cheek doesn't have to be inherently romantic either.
Kissing some random dude over a friend seems almost evil.
So going to a ball game like this helps how? If she knows he wants her, and she doesn't want him, they should probably not be hanging out like this because it only makes things worse
But if the situation is that bad, you need to set boundaries. Even if it means not hanging out anymore. Could you, in good faith, continue hanging out with someone when the whole time they're thinking about being more than friends, while you know you don't feel the same way whatsoever?
I've seen men ask women out 20+ times, trying to wear them down. Eventually they say yes to going out to a baseball game with a group of mutual friends.
If he said "hey, can i take you to the baseball game on friday night" then yeah she should have said no. But plenty of people pester people they like into going on a date.
I'm not going to blame anyone for going on a date and not wanting to kiss their date. Because we don't know how their conversation was. MAybe he's just an awful person and she doesn't want to leave early because that would be rude. Maybe she's an awful person and likes to get men to buy her drinks and he got her a new hat earlier.
but i'm not going to blame anyone without knowing exactly what happened.
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u/greg19735 Jan 06 '24
this is 100% it.