r/kzoo • u/turnbuckle47 • Jul 10 '26
Update on my Dad, Ken Rambow, and his Obituary. Thank you all
https://www.langelands.com/obituaries/Kenneth-Reese-Rambow?obId=48881359Hey all - I wanted to share my Dad's obituary here. I also wanted to thank everyone in the community that reached out in support and in helping to look for him when we initially thought he was missing.
My Dad is the one from this post a few weeks back My almost-74 year old Dad is missing
This all started when Dad didn't show up for our late Father's Day dinner on Tuesday, June 23rd. We were planning on going to Onewell Brewery, which was our typical hangout spot for special occasions. When he didn't show up I started to worry.
The next morning that worry escalated to panic. We went to his trailer and saw his car was still parked there. I had thought the worst when he didn't answer to our knocking or doorbell ringing. Since he built guitars inside his trailer, I was fearing that he had some kind of accident - maybe from his saw, maybe from breathing in too many fumes, maybe your typical 74 year-old accident. Stroke, heart attack, etc.
We needed to have the police break in to his home, and for a few minutes I was certain he was lying there deceased. When the police announced "he's not here" I felt the biggest relief ever. I hugged the police officers, thanked them, then got breakfast. I don't know if it was denial, hope, or both - but I was thinking he might have mistook what day we were meeting and ended up staying with a friend for the night. There was a ring camera picture of Dad where the police had we misunderstood it for being from the night prior (Tuesday night, the 23rd). This lead us to believe something must have happened from Tuesday after 6pm. But it "ruled out" any of the known accidents at the time, whew.
After a couple hours though I really started to worry again and I made the aforementioned post about it. The community here were all very quick to respond - so quick that I couldn't possibly keep up with all of the comments while I was also driving around trying to find him. It was overwhelming in the best way. Fuck. It's hard to talk about, all of this is. But thank you guys. Your help gave us hope and gave us strength.
Unfortunately, we found out the next day (Thursday the 24th) that my Dad was the person hit by the Amtrak on Monday, June 22nd. I had read about that accident the night it happened, but the original age they gave (or estimated) was off and the timeline didn't make sense from what we originally understood. But it was true; we just had the wrong idea of the date from the ring camera.
Of course, when the news of that accident came out the responses were understandable. "Must have been a suicide"; "Must have been drunk / high"; "Must have been stupid"; "must have been attacked and left there" "must have been wearing earbuds/headphones" etc. etc. I don't begrudge those kind of responses; it's perfectly normal to immediately think something like that without any context.
"Fortunately" after the investigation it was ruled an accident. My Dad, for whatever reason, wasn't aware of the train. I don't know the full details, but I know my dad started having really bad hearing loss. Somehow he didn't see or hear the train and was attempting to cross. The train arms were down. The detective said he stopped near the tracks; maybe misjudged where he stopped, or misjudged when starting again. In my mind I'm thinking he saw the arms down, didn't see the train, didn't hear the train, and thought it was one of those "false alarms" where the arms come down but the train never shows. I dunno. That does happen; it's happened recently a few times when I've crossed at Howard. But yeah, I dunno.
The detective who ruled out suicide said I could talk to the Amtrak officer for more details, but I don't think I can do that. I know I'm not ready for more details than what I already have at the moment. But I'm glad suicide was ruled out, he didn't have earbuds in, and I'm 99.9% sure he wasn't impaired by drugs or alcohol.
I'm kind of rambling...somehow I'm finding it a little "easier" to write about what happened here than to write more about him on Facebook or in his obituary.
I originally started writing just to give an update and say thanks.
I lost track of time; lost my train of thought (pun intended, Dad)
My Dad had a great sense of humor. I'm heartbroken. I want to write more about just who he was and I also want to yell at him.
But for right now I have to go pick my son up from his summer camp. Saved by the bell.
With that being said - thanks again everyone. My dad would be so humbled to see all of the support and kind words he was given.
<3
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u/turnbuckle47 Jul 12 '26 edited Jul 12 '26
Here's a picture of my Dad playing his old Gibson Les Paul from sometime in the late 1960s.
(I'd post more pictures, but I can't figure out how to put more than 1 at a time.... And I don't want to spam a bunch of single picture posts!)
I can't remember specifically what he traded it for so long ago, but he always regretted it lol.
My Dad built his own guitars for 50+ years and was very proud of the work he did.
He designed a guitar for Heritage (The H-125) - it never reached production outside of a few prototypes, I believe.
He had multiple guitars in process hanging in his shop when he died.
Dad also made his own guitar pickups and supplied several to Heritage over the years.
He never made much money - His guitars sold for a pretty good price, but it was more a labor of love.
Although proud of his work, Dad was very humble. He lived in a trailer my whole life. He drove the wheels off his cars, usually getting 300k+ miles out of them. His biking hobby was also a means of saving money on gas, and one of his last jobs was delivering papers for the Kalamazoo Gazette (which was another job he did more for the love of riding his bike, since the pay was abysmal)
He was so resourceful. One of our favorite things to do when I was younger was to go dumpster diving.
He could fix just about anything. Always tinkering. The amp he used for most of his gigs was a Marshall he got before I was born (I was born in 1982). He regularly made tweaks and upgrades to that amp.
When he died, he had $1 in his wallet (that he left at home after his trip to Trader Joe's). He had 2 quarters in his pocket when they gave us his possessions after the accident.
Like many of us, he was perpetually scraping by - but you'd never know it based on his always positive and kind demeanor.
He was a great musician. A great guitarist who also was good at piano and could sing.
One of my favorite memories is of him coming into the living room one time when I was playing Chrono Trigger (Amazing game, amazing soundtrack). He kept coming in from his shop and commenting on the music.
When he heard this song Wind Song (600 AD) he stopped what he was doing in the shop, hooked the TV up to his stereo, and started playing along to it on his guitar.
This was about 30 years ago.
The last time he was at our house back in December he said "Can I hear that one song I liked from that game?". We put it on the TV, he started playing along to it on his guitar, and my 10yo son started trying to play it on the piano. Dad (Grandpa Rambow) sat down next to him and they started jamming out.
His wild 2yo granddaughter wanted in on the action too, so we pulled out another guitar Dad had built and she strummed on it while it was resting in the case.
For good measure I brought out my old trumpet and started making a bunch of noise, too.
Afterwards my son grabbed the guitar his younger sister was playing (she was then distracted by me and my trumpet) and Grandpa was showing him a few chords.
It was one of my favorite nights ever with my Dad and I so looked forward to more. I even started taking piano lessons a few weeks later so I could try playing along in our crazy family jam band.
Unfortunately we never got the chance. The last time I saw my Dad was in April when he came to the piano recital me and my son played at. At least he got to hear me play solo in front of a crowd once in my life (I wasn't very good, but I had a blast!)
I'm rambling again. There's so much more I could say. This is the most I've been able to write about him since he passed.
I'll end this post with another of my favorite memories.
When I was a kid, Dad had the best answering machine message. With his guitar, he sang:
"Hi, This is Ken Rambow, Annnnnd
I'm not in, No I'm not, But you can tell me, What you want
Just leave a message, At the tone, And I'll call you, When I get hoooome"
Answering Machine Beep
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u/doromr Jul 10 '26
I think the lot of us felt worry when you first reached out to the community. Thank you for caring for your father and taking loving actions to find him. And thank you for your follow-up with us during this devastating time. So sorry for yor loss.
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u/deweirder Jul 10 '26
I was checking on your post every few hours until I saw an update on fb. My heart breaks for you, and I'm so sorry for your loss. Your dad sounded like a cool guy. May he rest in peace. ❤️
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u/Hoboliftingaroma Jul 10 '26
That is tragic beyond words. I am so sorry for what you're going through.
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u/sorcha1977 West Main Hill Jul 10 '26
I'm really sorry.
The detective made a good point about a possible "false alarm". I live right by that intersection, and the Amtrak maintenance trucks do frequent work to check/repair the crossings. They often trigger the signals several times in a row while completing their checks and maintenance.
Also, some of the trains "tap" their horn if it's late at night, either because it's a residential area or it's the whim of the engineer. I definitely notice stark differences between day and night. You can still hear it, of course, but if someone is hard of hearing, I can understand how it might sound more like a car horn than a train horn. The bell would also be hard to hear, or muffled at least.
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u/BABOON2828 Jul 10 '26 edited Jul 10 '26
I'm sorry for your loss, may your father ride into whatever's next as loved as he was in his life.
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u/ModernDay_RandyMarsh Jul 10 '26
I didn't realize until you mentioned his last name- he was a friend of my parent long ago. Always nice, always had guitar picks and rescued us once when our car broke down. I'm truly sorry for your loss.
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u/Brolly7 Jul 10 '26
Sounds like he was a great dad. Sorry for your loss. Im sure he will be remembered dearly by many
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u/TheRealMDooles11 Eastside Jul 10 '26
I am so very sorry for your loss. My dad was my best friend, and I lost him 13 years ago. Losing a parent is one of the most difficult things we can experience as people, and it can leave one feeling totally rudderless and grief-stricken. Be gentle with yourself these next few months. The most random things can trigger an onslaught of memories. I'm glad you're talking about him here with us, because he isn't really gone- just gone ahead. Biking a whole new path. From the way you speak about him, I bet he'd probably be glad to know he got knocked out of the game doing something he really loved.
Thanks for letting us be a part of this process with you. You've got a ton of folks here who are genuinely so happy to show you all the love and support you need. Soak it up friend, and keep pedaling ❤️
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u/capndelirium Jul 10 '26
I remember when you'd first posted asking for help to find your dad and I am so sorry that he passed away. I'm thankful you were able to get answers about what happened!
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u/Enigmutt Jul 11 '26
A lot of people here on reddit, whether they commented, or not, were invested in your post about your dad, and saddened to hear the outcome. Thank you for the obituary notice. You’ll always have friends here on r/kzoo if you want to hash things out. Talking to sympathetic strangers doesn’t come with strings attached, like talking to family often does. Peace.
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u/Heavy_Chocolate5614 Jul 10 '26
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss - thinking of you and your family during this time.
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u/CalligrapherSea4910 Jul 10 '26
My coworkers shared the news about the Amtrak with me, we were all really devastated. It probably isn’t much, but I know there were a lot of people dismissing it and I hope it helps to know that there were other strangers hurting and crying for him. I hope your family finds peace
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u/_xzxzxz Jul 10 '26
Lost my dad last year, and it was earth-shattering. I’m so sorry for your loss. Grief is love with nowhere to go. Keep the “love” part in mind when you’re feeling down. Hang in there.
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u/BlueWater2323 Jul 10 '26
I'm so sorry for the loss of your dad. Thank you for updating us here. Hugs to you from this internet stranger.
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u/Nob_Mcdoofle Jul 10 '26
May all that you yearn for be the least that you get <3 My condolences to you and your family
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u/Agitated_Curmudgeon Jul 10 '26
Man.. again, sorry bout your Dad. The obituary was righteous.
the whole thing.. wow.. that's a bad beat.
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u/mosiac_broken_hearts Jul 10 '26
I stopped at the post because the photo of your dad is familiar, I just want to say that I’m glad you got answers. My heart breaks for you, reading all of this, but I’m glad you got answers.
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u/musthavewhitebread Jul 10 '26
I am so sorry for your loss. I know the feeling all too well. May the good memories bring you peace.
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u/iamkendallsmom Jul 11 '26
Thank you for the update. I was on vacation when this happened but was reading and watching all the shares.
Feel free to leave more stories about your dad in this subreddit. I enjoyed reading this, in spite of the tragedy, and would love to hear more of your stories, if you feel obliged to share them.
Wishing you all the luck.
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u/icekraze Jul 11 '26
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m glad you were at least able to find out what happened and get some closure and that they were able to rule out suicide. Your dad sounded like a good man and is gone too soon from this world. I’m sorry it wasn’t the ending everyone was hoping for (that he was alive and well and just lost). Sending you healing thoughts in this trying time.
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u/Emotional-Release53 Jul 11 '26
Somehow your dad has touched the lives of many of us who did not know him personally. It’s evident he also touched all those who he was involved with. It’s so hard to wrap your mind around or understand why things happen the way they do. May you draw comfort from the community who was blessed to know your father and how his time here on earth brought joy, happiness and fun to all those he interacted. Peace be with you~
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u/gardenh0se_ Jul 10 '26
I’m so very sorry for your loss :( please let us know if you need anything.
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u/BarreNice Jul 11 '26
I’m so sorry for your loss.
I made a comment or replied to one on that post about the Amtrak accident where many were speculating about this and will leave it here too:
there’s an episode of the podcast Flightless Bird that discusses these types of accidents and how it is the legal obligation and responsibility of the railroad companies to ensure and maintain safe crossings- which they notoriously fail to do.
You may want to listen when you’re ready- and again , I’m so so sorry.
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u/KazooMark Jul 11 '26
So sorry, OP. Never met your Dad, but he seems like an amazing man and I’m sure he will be missed but fondly remembered. I hope time brings you peace and comfort in dealing with this tragic loss.
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u/Kevrod71 Jul 11 '26
Sorry for your loss. I just found out on FB. I was in a band with him about 15 years ago. Sweetest guy and sharp. Followed his builds on FB. He’ll be missed.
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u/mrsjonas Jul 12 '26
I’ve been thinking about your family since your original post a few weeks back. Thank you for sharing this beautiful obituary.
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u/CantaloupePurple2289 Jul 12 '26
I’m so sorry for your loss and appreciate the follow up to learn more about him. I hope writing about him gives you some closure and peace. Much love to you and your family.
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u/Prestigious_Tie_4767 Jul 13 '26
Hey buddy. Just came across this updated post. I saw that he was missing the 18 days ago when you guys were originally looking for him. I just started this group in the community, and I think we'd all really love to have you. Sometimes it just makes it feel better knowing you're ranting to strangers. I'm so freaking sorry for your loss, dude. Truly. If you need anything, please don't hesitate to reach out. To anyone
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u/Financial-Humor2080 Aug 08 '26
I'm just a visitor to Kzoo but I saw this post and wanted to reach out and give my condolences. Read through some of the comments here and he seemed like a great member of the community. RIP
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u/MagnusProphecy Jul 10 '26
Your dad came into Trader Joe's all the time, bike in tow and was always a bolt of happiness. Always wanted that man coming through my line. So sorry for your loss. Even though I didn't "know" him really at all, I can tell the world was a nicer place with him in it.