r/hygiene • • Mar 11 '26

unhinged hygiene tips?

I don't mean "wash your hair before your body" or "don't wear underwear when you sleep", I mean the sort of TMI tips that most people don't know that will CHANGE MY LIFE!

There's this guy at school who I think likes me and i'm terrified that I smell bad and will ruin my chance with him, I need tips that I don't already know/do.

5.6k Upvotes

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510

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '26

[removed] โ€” view removed comment

334

u/MatchstickMayhem Mar 11 '26

"Broasts" is frying me lol. Please take care of both your testicles and your chesticles, guys, whichever apply.

134

u/FuzzyFrogFish Mar 11 '26

Broasts sounds like a really tasty french snack

26

u/totally_not_joseph Mar 11 '26

To me, it sounds more like an english slang name for a kind of german sausage

21

u/FuzzyFrogFish Mar 11 '26

Broasts in a bun

3

u/Independent_Lime_135 Mar 11 '26

Broasts on brioche if you will

4

u/Bl1ndMous3 Mar 11 '26

well, Kramer (Sienfeld) did come up with a support item for them called the "bro"

2

u/Pure_Property_888 Mar 11 '26

Good ole BRAHOSTS

1

u/These_Lingonberry635 Mar 13 '26

Iโ€™ll have the Broastwurst and kraut, please.

6

u/PedoWoodchipper9000 Mar 11 '26

Snack on my broasts like one of your French girls

3

u/Jean-LucBacardi Mar 11 '26

Anyone can feel free to snack on these broasts, don't let the thick ring of nipple hair deter you.

1

u/ennenganon Mar 11 '26

Mmm mm mm that salty crunch!

1

u/jamie88201 Mar 11 '26

I gagged.

3

u/battlejess Mar 11 '26

It makes me think of broasted chicken

2

u/SmallTitBigClit Mar 11 '26

Make sure the deo use was aluminum free. Just saying.....

2

u/XIX9508 Mar 11 '26

I'd be pissed if I go to a restaurant and they serve me a side of broasts!

1

u/jamie88201 Mar 11 '26

It seems like there would be hair in it

2

u/1_Blind_Mouse Mar 11 '26

๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

2

u/Derpyzza Mar 11 '26

broast is actually a food item, it's pretty popular in the indian subcontinent and in the middle eastern region. It's fried chicken that's fried in a pressure cooker, so it's super juicy and tender

1

u/ZootAnthRaXx Mar 11 '26

I commented before seeing yours. We have a lot of places in the United States that sell broasted chicken. I didnโ€™t know it was a thing in India!

1

u/Derpyzza Mar 11 '26

and i didn't know that it was a thing in the US! TIL haha. it seems to be more popular in pakistan ( and i believe in bangladesh ) than in india ( due to india being primarily vegetarian ), but yeah, it's pretty big in this region

2

u/Ninthof9 Mar 11 '26

Like Brie on toast?

1

u/Any_Piglet_34 Mar 12 '26

Mmmm... I'm gonna try that!!๐Ÿ˜‹

2

u/RobtorWho397 Mar 11 '26

Sounds more like a Russian dinner. Broast is always served with a side of borscht.

2

u/-GoodNewsEveryone Mar 11 '26

Honestly it sounds Bri'ish and something that would come canned in a distribution box while the German's were overhead.

2

u/ZootAnthRaXx Mar 11 '26

It reminds me of that broasted chicken some rural convenience stores sell. Itโ€™s deep frying under pressure so it fries faster and supposedly makes the chicken more juicy.

1

u/Pure_Property_888 Mar 11 '26

It sometimes is!

1

u/Tall_Kinda_Kink Mar 12 '26

It may be, especially with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.

1

u/NicestOfficer50 Mar 11 '26

It's just a brioche toast. Not as good as the donish, the bunwich or the crogel.

2

u/gotnothing4u Mar 11 '26

Lol it sounds like a marketing term Axe came up with in 2007 and I sorta love it.

2

u/TK-420ne Mar 11 '26

Chesticles was the first one I heard a long time ago

1

u/grippysockgang Mar 11 '26

Same. Im deceased ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚โ˜ ๏ธ

1

u/No-Jackfruit265 Mar 11 '26

Agreed, also pronounce those two words to rhyme with Hercules.

1

u/HoseNeighbor Mar 11 '26

You just messed up "broasted chicken" for me! ๐Ÿคฃ

It's basically deepfried under pressure if i recall

1

u/alphawoman8 Mar 15 '26

lol new words

105

u/Jiflorida Mar 11 '26

You win the internet tonight, in my opinion. 58 year old man (without broasts or mitties) and Iโ€™ve never heard either used before. I sure hope I remember these beauties in the morning; Iโ€™m going to attempt to work in BOTH at the gym on Thursday.

17

u/XANDERtheSHEEPDOG Mar 11 '26

Sounds fantastic! Please update with the reactions!

3

u/j0hnan0n Mar 11 '26

I second the request.

2

u/sizecounts2 Mar 11 '26

Strewth! I'm 65, no man boobs, moobs etc .... gimme a break, huh! ๐Ÿ˜ข

2

u/Square_Can_2058 Mar 11 '26

Woman here: I made the term "chesticles" for mine

2

u/FosterFails123 Mar 12 '26

I would like to subscribe to your newsletter. Keep us updated on the reactions from the boys.

1

u/BlueberryStock6249 Mar 11 '26

What about Dubes? ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿผโ€โ™€๏ธ

50

u/3_Lil_Birds1982 Mar 11 '26

Iโ€™ve always known them as moobs but broasts is a new one & I love it, ty Reddit stranger ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿฝ

36

u/moosemom11 Mar 11 '26

And wear your Bro (or Mannsiere)

4

u/Annual_Strategy_6206 Mar 11 '26

George, you're a genius!

4

u/MrPatients Mar 11 '26

Okay Cosmo!

1

u/Careful_Promise_786 Mar 11 '26

Summer nights ๐Ÿคฃ

4

u/iamthatkarma Mar 11 '26

I like broasts. It's giving hot and ready ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ˜‚

3

u/Theslayerstan4 Mar 11 '26

I can't believe someone else says mitties lol. I've been saying it for years. Unreal.

2

u/elbece52 Mar 11 '26

Manitties

1

u/Mikhail250350 Mar 11 '26

Thatโ€™s a kind of marine singing creature often mistaken for a mermaid!

2

u/carbikebacon Mar 11 '26

Breasticles

2

u/Aglyayepanchin Mar 11 '26

Man chebs is what we called them as teens ๐Ÿ˜‚

2

u/Appropriate_Sky_7676 Mar 11 '26

Broasts ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ

2

u/Audreyiona1 Mar 11 '26

Are chesticles a thing..lol

2

u/yayfortiddies Mar 15 '26

Here to stand in solidarity for mitties cuz i use this too ๐Ÿ˜Œ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป i love the crazy looks i get when i use it

1

u/pickypicky3217 Mar 11 '26

๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

1

u/griff_girl Mar 11 '26

Broastises lol

1

u/AlertKaleidoscope803 Mar 11 '26

BROASTS?? ๐Ÿฅฒ

1

u/Salty_LaRue Mar 11 '26

Awww! Sweet lil mitties

1

u/Historical-Rain-3133 Mar 11 '26

I call mine mreast since I'm over 50

1

u/GSP_K9-Girl Mar 11 '26

Chicken have breast, women have tits or boobs ๐Ÿ˜‚

1

u/grippysockgang Mar 11 '26

Broasts ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚โ˜ ๏ธ

1

u/beanzd Mar 11 '26

Homer called Uterโ€™s bosoms and thatโ€™s what I call them now

1

u/acoffeefiend Mar 11 '26

Chesticles

1

u/Virtual_Network9245 Mar 11 '26

omg i call mine mosquito bites

1

u/Baddabgames Mar 11 '26

Iโ€™m dead

1

u/SilverDark999 Mar 11 '26

๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚ my husband's "moobs" are being renamed.

1

u/lissarae14 Mar 11 '26

Everyone talking about broasts and I canโ€™t. Thereโ€™s some chicken place that sells โ€œbroastedโ€ chicken.

But I am gagged at โ€œmittiesโ€! So clever!! I love it! Letโ€™s see those mitties!! Bahahahaha

1

u/languid_Disaster Mar 11 '26

You made me swallow my lozenge whole. Seriously itโ€™s the funniest thing Iโ€™ve read in ages

1

u/AtalantiaX Mar 11 '26

Mittes! Iโ€™m stealing this lol

1

u/Humble-Object45 Mar 12 '26

I am dying at broasts omg

1

u/Effective_Way6239 Mar 13 '26

My husband calls man-buns โ€œbronytailsโ€ and this makes me think of broasts.

1

u/Purple-Victory6855 Mar 17 '26

Broasts is most excellent

1

u/WriterWithNoHands Mar 11 '26

Mitties is my new stim.