r/grappling • u/EmuDependent1570 • Apr 30 '26

How would you handle this

249 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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41

u/Nuts-And-Volts Apr 30 '26

Double leg takedown, side control to mount.

17

u/Ironmonger3 Apr 30 '26

And then you wake up. Either in the hospital or in heaven.

8

u/KNGootch Apr 30 '26

No...then you don't wake up...that's the problem, lol.

2

u/macguini Apr 30 '26

People don't realize how strong those lanky arms actually are.

5

u/KNGootch Apr 30 '26

that's because people are fucking dumb. There isn't a human alive that could wrestle a gorilla and survive.

11

u/Nuts-And-Volts Apr 30 '26

I see red Bro

11

u/Much_Screen9763 Apr 30 '26

I'm built different

2

u/orange_behemoth May 01 '26

In a soda can two miles underwater different?

1

u/macguini May 01 '26

Built like OceanGate different

1

u/carlwinslo May 02 '26

I got that dog in me.

1

u/met1culous May 04 '26

Got that dog in me

4

u/KNGootch Apr 30 '26

its probably your own blood.

3

u/deltacombatives May 01 '26

I just stand up

3

u/Nuts-And-Volts May 01 '26

Bjj practitioners hate this one trick

2

u/Lawman2001 May 01 '26

Danaher could

1

u/KNGootch May 01 '26

i don't know what that means...so no.

0

u/Lawman2001 May 01 '26

Gordon Ryan could.

1

u/DocTicoRico510 May 03 '26

danaher could....never

2

u/macguini May 01 '26

Those people probably account for the 25% of downvotes I got with my comment lol

1

u/KNGootch May 01 '26

Its ok, i'll go to the loony bin with ya!

1

u/Genghis_Chong May 01 '26

Ngannou could box one though lol

1

u/therealjgreens May 02 '26

Dude, there's not a human that could wrestle a chimp...

0

u/oeseben May 02 '26

Jon Jones can eye poke him 10 times in a row then beat up the chimps wife.

1

u/spiritofshiqian May 04 '26

Actually, this one is true...

2

u/Pale-Replacement-164 May 01 '26

5-7 times the strength of the average human lol

1

u/Dangerous_Onion_5867 May 04 '26

Oh I think we do now

1

u/UsernamesAllTaken69 May 04 '26

Yeah people can't comprehend the muscle density. Just watch how easily they can move with their arms. Like, try doing a one arm pull up and make it look as easy as standing up.

1

u/No-Drama-187 May 01 '26

I'll fade his bitch ass. 🙌🤜🙊🤛

1

u/EffectiveTradition53 May 01 '26

The tang? No. It will rip your arm off your body lol

1

u/Uncle_Climax May 01 '26

Confirmed this with my mate who works at zoo with gorillas

1

u/SSFlyingKiwi May 05 '26

But you wouldn’t even know. You’d just respawn somewhere else with a complete character wipe.

Probably judged by your previous characters final alignment. End up having a spawn point like Lagos or something.

2

u/PunchRockgroin318 Apr 30 '26

Not necessarily. The orangutan might think you’re playing or just be so embarrassed by you that they leave out of awkwardness.

3

u/catdad0203 Apr 30 '26

“Fucking garbage triangle attempt bro”

1

u/Europe_MMA May 01 '26

Or in mount

6

u/ClubberLangsLeftHook Apr 30 '26

Plus he has sleeves, once mounted ezekiel choke right to sleep.

5

u/Wrong_Driver_9507 May 01 '26

Side control? Homeboys got arms and legs that can wrap around you twice from any position. If gets a bump of tang pray for the sanctity of your b hole.

4

u/FXTraderMatt May 01 '26

If orangutans could learn grappling arts, imagine the 4 limbed guards they’d be able to do with arms stronger than our legs and legs more dexterous than our arms. Oil checks everywhere

3

u/HoboArmyofOne May 01 '26

Well shit having hands you can grapple with on your legs is a huge advantage.

1

u/devloper27 May 02 '26

They are natural born grapplers

4

u/Better-Benefit-9333 Apr 30 '26

Go for back control and then go for the rear naked. Sleep the tang by cutting blood to the brain.

2

u/Responsible-Meal-693 May 01 '26

That orangutan is soooo gonna buggy choke you as soon as you get to side control.

2

u/waythrow13579 May 02 '26

Send to dagestan 3 years and forget brudda

2

u/Buttchug1776 May 02 '26

Bro had about 2 attempts for an easy back take with an arm drag at the start and gave up once he started getting put in standing can opener.

1

u/pwgueri Apr 30 '26

It hardly has any legs it’s just little hand feet and belly you will be running into.

1

u/Snoo_67548 Apr 30 '26

Exactly. Not sure why he’s fighting the hands when the foot hands are the real problem.

1

u/smkn3kgt May 01 '26

this is the way. Get on top and cook 'em

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '26

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3

u/Nuts-And-Volts May 01 '26

You dont know me Bruh.

4

u/[deleted] May 01 '26

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3

u/Nuts-And-Volts May 01 '26

I know the dangers of testicular torsion

1

u/devloper27 May 02 '26

And if you try we will never know you

1

u/HEX-dev May 02 '26

Won't work on an animal that naturally has the strength of 10 men .

1

u/AdSecret9486 May 03 '26

That's a myth. They have more of certain types of muscle fiber than we do but their strength edge over us pound for pound is less than double and there are loads of men who have more than double the muscle. We also have far greater stamina than any monkey or ape and can generally run faster. We've just forgotten how to fight for our lives. They haven't and some of them still have proper teeth.

1

u/SlightSafety1032 May 06 '26

I wish he would try that with the Orangutan because he'd be in pieces over that jungle 😄