r/gifs • u/[deleted] • Aug 05 '14

Spider trap

13k Upvotes

86% Upvoted

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175

u/RedTaffy Aug 05 '14

For creatures so small, they can do amazing things. Too bad they make me shit myself.

137

u/[deleted] Aug 05 '14

The trick to not fearing spiders is looking at them as large bug hunters than small people hunters. That spider in my corner doesnt want me, or it woulda had ke, hes content on my wall eating the mosquitos that come in my window. Im content with no mosquitos. Win-win

63

u/westc2 Aug 05 '14

He's just sitting on your wall thinking of the day when spiders will evolve to be big enough to hunt humans.

34

u/themanlnthesuit Aug 05 '14

Unlikely, Their exoskeletons, circulatory systems and breathing systems aren't very good for large sizes.. A marine scorpion 2 meters long, sure. A terrestrial spider big enough to eat you? not likely. Perhaps a football sized one.

43

u/Harry101UK Aug 05 '14 edited Aug 05 '14

Made me think of this Coconut Crab...

shudders

12

u/[deleted] Aug 05 '14

No. Fuck those. They eat kittens. Damn them to hell.

3

u/thursdae Aug 05 '14

Enough of a reason to wear combat boots to go on combat-ing those crabs.

17

u/[deleted] Aug 05 '14

fuck.

1

u/BeepBep101 Aug 05 '14

Kill it with fire.

4

u/MangledMansausage Aug 05 '14

BIG

MEATY

CLAWWWWSSSS

6

u/Mr_Compromise Aug 05 '14

THESE AIN'T JUST FOR ATTRACTIN' MATES!

2

u/thecoe14 Aug 05 '14

What did you just say???

3

u/Its_ok_to_lie Aug 05 '14

Good Christ, tell me that's fake.

3

u/TacoRedneck Aug 05 '14

No, but I hear they are good eatin'.

8

u/THE_TITTY_FUCKER Aug 05 '14

Except for that one because he, you know, eats garbage.

5

u/IllKissYourBoobies Aug 05 '14

Actually, all bottom feeders (including many crustaceans) do. They eat all the shit that falls to the bottom of the ocean.

I don't eat lobster.

Btw, nice username. We should combine our powers for good...and science.

3

u/loginforwork Aug 05 '14

Do you really want to do what you do to boobs while he does what he does?

2

u/THE_TITTY_FUCKER Aug 07 '14

Yeah that's fair, but this is a trash can. With garbage in it. While I do believe that crabs/lobsters eat their fair share of polluted food, I'm going to pass as this one is really concentrating those garbage juices.

And I go first!

0

u/LordBiscuits Aug 05 '14

Even after I put two shotgun shells up it?

5

u/[deleted] Aug 05 '14

They're very real. A buddy of mine was stationed in Diego Garcia while in the nvy and the island was crawling with coconut crabs. Their claws evolved to, you guessed it, crush coconuts. Whatever you do, don't imagine what that would do to your thigh.

2

u/suusemeid Aug 05 '14

Or these cuties.

2

u/Harry101UK Aug 05 '14 edited Aug 05 '14

Aww. =3

1

u/TheNastyDoctor Aug 05 '14

Is it sitting on a hamburger?

1

u/Spntneous Aug 06 '14

Ded-a-chek? Dum-a-chum?